festive ?

always trying

What would you wear if an invitation said attire -festive?

Prior to 4 years ago our ski, biking and hiking group had its Christmas party at a country club. It was very pretty and everyone dressed up. We experienced declining membership and cost increases. So the country club became too costly. One of our members volunteered her home. Someone suggested since it was in a home some would come in jeans or something too casual. So to keep it a more dressy affair I suggested we say attire "festive". The first two years everyone dressed about the same as at the country club. Now it is getting very casual -some in jeans and sneakers. at first festive was suggested as we thought the guys would be the ones to come in jeans, etc.
Last year even some women were quite casual-

6 years ago

Dressing

13 replies

Latest reply was from bella

JAileen

Veteran

For many years we've gone to a Christmas party with outdoor caroling. It's very casual. I think we wore this last year. My husband and I both wore festive sweaters, *not* ugly sweaters, and jeans.

This post has 1 photo. Photos uploaded by this member are only visible to other logged in members.

If you aren't a member, but would like to participate, please consider signing up. It only takes a minute and we'd love to have you.

6 years ago

rachylou

Veteran

I’d wear my disco clothes... I wear gold lame leggings once a year for our company Christmas party, lol.

Hmm. But maybe I should switch it up this year.

6 years ago

LaPed

Veteran

Love those sweaters, JAileen! Esp the starry night over the trees.

My husband's office does a "festive" dress code for the holiday party (hors d'ouevres and drinks at a local steak house). Men show up in shirts, sometimes ties, and not-sneakers. Women are usually in dresses or dressy trousers and blouses. You see a few holiday sweaters in the mix but not the "ugly" kind. It's not a blingy party, but it's a bunch of engineers in rural New England -- the antithesis of fancy! This year I'm wearing plaid wool trousers, a navy blue silk top, a long silver pendant, and silver flats. DH will wear one of his two dress shirts, his boring "good" trousers, and his "good" Blundstones (the thin-soled kind).

So yes, I'd say "festive" might get people back to a dressier level at your get-together.

6 years ago

Jenni NZ

Veteran

I've been to a "festive" 21st and a "festive" 50th, the former in a home in January and the latter in a bar in June. In NZ it is code for "dress up a bit fancy with some sparkles for the women", I think. For us January is summer and June mid-winter. So festive doesn't necessarily mean Christmas, but if that dress code were given at Christmas it would be taken to be party wear. Because we are such a casual society there would still be jeans and in summer there would be shorts worn, by the men at least. This can only be avoided by putting at least as high as "semi-formal" on the dress code. I think for us, it is that many people, especially the men but often women too, just genuinely feel happier in casual dress. I love dressing up and sparkles so I will use that dress code as a trigger to go blingy. For the 21st I took the chance to wear my only fully sequinned silver top!
Could you step it up to semi-formal if you want a higher standard? Because it sounds like you're saying festive already and they are dressing more casually than you hope?

6 years ago

approprio

(website)

Veteran

I always think these occasions call for a bit of tasteful bling. This could be shiny like rachylou's leggings, whimsical like JAileen's knits, luxe like LaPed's silk blouse, or sparkly like JenniNZ.

Maybe you should qualify the 'festive' somehow? How can you get people to up their game without them dressing like a Christmas tree?

6 years ago

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

My first thoughts at the title were Lisa P’s holiday pieces and Delurked’s jumpsuit, though I’d probably actually end up in a dress (boring!). I don’t think jeans are an automatic disqualifier, but it depends what they’re worn with. Maybe a colored Oxford or dress shirt on the guys, and a smattering of accessories like suspenders and bow ties. A solid black sweater with a sparkly bib necklace or a bright colored top like Angie often pairs with dark jeans would seem “festive” to me. A graphic T-shirt, even with a holiday-themed print, is unlikely to feel that way to me.

Do you plan to raise this with the group? What reasons will you give? If people aren’t dressing up, maybe that’s not what the majority wants the party to be. I think the host’s wishes would carry a little extra weight.

Here’s a crazy idea for getting people to think about what they wear: you list three activities as the core of this group. You could have people who principally engage in one wear winter white and blue, another wear red and green and the last in sparkly gold and black, or some such code.

Or you could look for a different venue, like a restaurant that has a private room (and the dress code you desire).

6 years ago

Jenni NZ

Veteran

Maybe you just need to spell it out more on the next invitation: no jeans, no sneakers, this is a chance to dress up a bit.

6 years ago

binkle

Veteran

I guess it is a matter of "know your audience". Seems like your group of outdoorsy active types might not want to do it up too much for a celebratory holiday party? Some people like to bling it up, some dread it, some may even resent it.

If I got an invite that said festive, I'd try to consider who it is from, the expected group, where the party will be, any past experience with this group/event. I can be festive in my dressy long black skirt and ruffly ivory silk blouse and jeweled black holiday cardigan, or I can be festive in nicer jeans, a velvet blazer and sequin tee. But I like the opportunity to jazz it up. Festive for some one else is maybe the party experience and good times, not fussing with their outfit.

Jenni said it - be specific! Would some of these folks be insulted if the invite stated "no jeans"?

6 years ago

JAileen

Veteran

I want to add another experience: We were invited to another Christmas party several years ago. The invitation said "caroling". We went dressed as above, in jeans, but festively. Another couple we knew from the other party (this is a small town) dressed the same. We were greeted at the door by the hostesses' father who was wearing a tux! The caroling was not outdoors, but gathered around the grand piano. Everyone except the four of us was dressed to the nines.

6 years ago

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

JAileen, OMGeeeee. I also would have assumed that “caroling” meant going door to door. I hope you and your hosts could laugh off the misunderstanding.

6 years ago

Runcarla

Veteran

For a Christmas party in the pm that said 'Festive' I would be inclined towards my black velvet leggings and green and black velvet cut-out top. If it was for Chanukah or the New Year - my silver foil T-shirt. NOT jeans or sneakers.

Now for the local Santa Clause parade in the am (next weekend) I will be dressing festive but casual - with red leather high tops and a red puffer, and possibly a stocking hat with a pom-pom!

6 years ago

Aquamarine

Veteran

If you want people to dress a certain way, you need to spell it out. My usual holiday events are house parties and without a specific request to dress a certain way, the attendees are all over the map, dresswise. I try to strike a middle ground, maybe erring on the dressier side after my first party in this neighborhood. No dress code was given, so we wore nicer clothes. When I walked in, I was mortified at how blinged-up everyone was, when I wasn’t. Two women even had on long dresses (ok, over-the-top), and white-gloved waiters were passing food.

6 years ago

bella

(website)

Veteran

When i see festive, i think jeans are fair game. Classic dark wash, with a blingy top and heels but jeans nonetheless. If this is not what you have in mind, I think you should be more specific.

6 years ago

Category