Double Spinoff: 5 adjectives and the image you want/need to project

Liz A.

In Sharon's thread about our style adjectives, I put:

Simple
Sleek
Feminine
Flattering

In reading over other people's answers, I've been thinking more about it and wondering if I could hone the words further to express my true style. But then I was wondering what exactly are these words meant to do? Are they meant to describe or prescribe? Haha, like are they the chicken or the egg? I guess it's like what Angie talks about in her post: your current style vs. your aspirational style. So like I want these adjectives to do work for me! As in when I'm shopping they help me decide whether or not to buy something, or whether to buy this vs. that.

So that's where I get confused, am I expressing the way I really want to dress? Or the way I have to dress for the life I have? If I could wear whatever I wanted to work, I think my adjectives would be something like this:

Casual
Comfortable
Simple
Flattering
Urban

But taking into account that I work 5 days out of the week in a professional setting, maybe they should be more like what I have above. Does anyone else face the same challenge? What are your thoughts/words of wisdom?

10 years ago

Inspiration

9 replies

Latest reply was from Suz

Liz

Veteran

This doesn't address your larger question, but why couldn't (most of) your preferred words work for your work style as well? With the exception of "casual," they all seem as if they could be appropriate to outfits for an office (comfortable, simple, flattering, urban).

10 years ago

Liz A.

Veteran

Good question, Liz. I guess you're right about that, and maybe I'm expecting the adjectives to take responsibility for my wardrobe, but I think I sometimes do need help in the dressing room, because I'm still making more orphan purchases than would be desirable.

Ummm, so when I think of urban though I'm meaning it to be more like a hip hop style, so like flashy sneakers, cute t-shirts, jeans, and fun outerwear.

10 years ago

Helena

Veteran

Liz, I totally hear you - during my working days my words would probably have been: sleek, modern, dressy, polished, bold. I loved black, stilettos, bold-colored purses in clean-lined shapes, sleek suits, etc.

But now I am a SAHM in the 'burbs where my main audience is the other moms doing pick-up runs and dressing up means putting on the "good jeans" - so now my reality list is really more like: casual, relaxed, simple, understated ...

So is that the real me, or is the first one the real me, or do these lists really just reflect my environment and have nothing to do with me at all? I have no idea!! But I do relate to the dilemma!

I suppose if I had to pick ones that described both eras: crisp, classic, unfussy, polished, and (thanks to gryffin), essential would fit both bills ... so maybe those are my words?

sorry for the tangeant ... very thought-provoking question!

What is brainstormed a larger list for each role, and then looked to see if there were any words that landed under both (even if they were not your top words), as an over-arching guideline ... and perhaps a few extra words that are role-specific? is that too many words? (not unlike my reply haah!)

10 years ago

Liz A.

Veteran

Yes, exactly, torontogirl! I was hoping some other people could relate and not to make the whole thread about me

But that's how I feel too. Which one is the real me? I usually feel like it's the casual me, because that's what came first. But then the professional me is more dominant now. I will try to brainstorm like you said and see what I come up with.

10 years ago

rabbit

Veteran

I'm going through the same thought process. I think the point I'm at now is that I want a few words that describe my current style and my style through time when it has produced the highest happiness factor for me, whether worn at work or home. So it doesn't include everything, just the highlights. So for me so far those words are: graceful, charming, rogue.

Then the two other words are aspirational, a higher/more specific bar I want new purchases to meet, so those are: grounded (craftsmanship, carefully considered, practical, sustainable, necessary), and edgy/contemporary - I want new clothes to add a new flavor to my existing wardrobe.

So if I look at my existing clothes through the lens of these words it should help me focus on retaining the highest happiness factor ones, and also give me guidance and take new purchases to another level. At least that's the hope...

I can see how you might have a different set of words for home versus work, with 'Urban' and 'Casual' being the harder ones to apply at work. But then, there might be a way to remix the same items, or bring a few of those 'you at home' influences into your work dressing.

Maybe you could try a Ven Diagram of your words, and maybe your ward-drobe items? Two circles, home and work, and see where they overlap.

10 years ago

rachylou

Veteran

My 5 address what I think about (in my own unique way) when picking things out. They barely, if at all, describe the result IMO. It's a little bit of a problem for me, because I *would* like to have a sense of what I look like from the outside. On the other hand, I would have a hard time putting together outfits trying to make them look a certain way. I don't know how to explain that. I'd probably buy 7 pairs of the same pants, 7 of the same tops, etc.

10 years ago

Gigi

Veteran

Hmm...I work at home, so I don't have as much of the same dilemma. I guess my goal, were I in your shoes, would be to apply my at-home descriptors to my work wardrobe but perhaps in different ways. For example, "casual" for work could perhaps mean a button-down shirt that is of a softer, drapier fabric, like silk--in other words, not crisp. "Comfortable" likewise could be on a spectrum. Maybe it's not *as* comfy for work as at home, but you could aim always to pick something that is relatively comfy--for instance, a pencil skirt that has quite a lot of stretch in it. Or maybe you feel like pants are in general comfier than skirts, so you will want to skew your work wardrobe toward pants. For "urban," maybe you could have red patent pumps, or a brightly colored necklace or scarf? Or crazy earrings? How about a colorful handbag?

Of course, I have no idea what kind of setting your work is. Some workplaces are so formal that wearing anything even remotely exciting or soft is out of the question!

10 years ago

Liz A.

Veteran

Sometimes starting a thread like this is so helpful! All of your comments are getting at different pieces of the puzzle. I can see how my dilemma could be reversed for someone like torontogirl who feels inately more dressy but lives a casual life.

Rabbit, having two sets of words would be safer, because then I wouldn't accidentally buy and wear something that is really too casual for work, which I have done in the past and now regret. But at the same time, you do want your whole wardrobe to feel united in a way, right? I have been feeling more me at work since joining YLF. I'll have to think about exactly why... an overall color scheme is probably part of it.

Rachylou, I'm not sure I totally understand... are you saying that when you go out of your comfort zone, you default to a uniform of sorts? I can kinda see that happening in my case. However, a uniform does seem better than accidentally wearing something too short or other mistakes I have made.

Gigi, I work for the government, so the dress code is business casual I think. You're right, since joining YLF I've also moved towards softer, drapier, so maybe I really have made progress after all. And red pumps is a fantastic idea!

10 years ago

Suz

(website)

Veteran

When I was starting to try to make sense of all this, I did a version of what Torontogirl suggests. I thought about my two favourite outfits EVER and brainstormed lists of words that applied to each and then looked for any overlapping words or associations. This was more illuminating than I expected, considering one was a jeans and Docs outfit and one was a two piece silk dress.

I also did the Angie exercise of describing my current style and then my aspirational style -- and I still do that exercise about once a year or so.

If your office is business casual there should be the possibility of some overlap between your out of work style and your work style. (Some jackets, tops, some footwear). But perhaps you'd prefer to keep them in separate spheres!

One forum member who is a school principal felt that she really didn't have a handle on her casual style at all, so she spent a good month or two evaluating just that part of her closet and trying to come up with a few capsules that were truly casual and felt great. For her, the division between the two areas helped her feel clearer on her needs in each, and that in turn drove her shopping decisions.

10 years ago

Category