@Rachylou - I'm in marketing. There's not an engineer anywhere near here. And I'm wearing boots. I can't wear black skirts and opaque hose? That's just not cool.

Oh, they looked like ankle-strap heels to me. I need to clean my screen! But boots and booties also generally didn't go down, and definitely not with the tough/sexy edge of all-black.

I'd say the only allowance marcom peeps got was a Rolex - but I'd be lying. That was marcom stretching things to the limit.

Conservative people and dress norms are interesting.

ETA: I imagine you *can* wear them. People will get used to you.

This isn't a conservative office, though. It's very casual.

I just really don't think I dressed inappropriately, which is why I don't understand the reaction. I wore boots with opaque black tights, so of course men will stare? It's been 30 years since that was an official work uniform, thank you Donna Karan. Not buying it.

Honestly, I am so spaced out in general, that I don't even know if someone is looking at me. Also, I am too cynical, my first thought is going to be that something is wrong i.e. I have lettuce on muy teeth or my zipper is down etc. I honestly don't care either way, because I dress for me and me alone. Also, in all honesty, there is so much to look here that I am nothing remarkable. Eeee...

Casual can be conservative. And conservatism doesn't progress, I have to point out. It's still 1972 at least.

I think it's appropriate, but I also think it's glance inducing. I find for some reason the boots with skirt thing harkens to superhero and gets more attention that just plain flats. Tights or not, the silhouette is there. heck, tights are all superhero, too.

Perhaps they are looking because you are dressed differently from your "normal" fare. Eee, don't think much about it.

I'm so glad I quit and am moving to the coast again. This is baloney.

Oh... I think I owe you a congratulations, IK!

Sure, I am 43 too and I don't mind a little glance (there is a fine line between glance and ogle). Today, a gentleman (client) even said to me:"Nice watch, and I notice no ring!" Ha ha! He is 35 years my senior and he also reported that his wife divorced him because she waned to shake rattle and roll, and all he could do was rattle (because of all the pills he takes). It was harmless and cute. Not to downplay sexual harassment which is not cool. BTW, I am married just never wear my ring for hygiene reasons.

DH and I laugh that we are both so oblivious to attention from the opposite sex that it is a wonder either of us ever got married, let alone to each other. I can see that women look him up and down, and he says he sees men look me over. But neither of us ever notices the opposite sex looking at us.

I have been catcalled, although not much given that I live in a small town where I don't walk very many places. It mostly happened when I was living in larger metropolitan areas. And I do NOT find it flattering. I find it creepy and intimidating.

OK, I do have something to say about this.
- When I was younger, I always looked down because like Avahmaria I felt really uncomfortable with ANY kind of attention (I was that shy). My strategy was to ignore 100%.
- As I became older and more comfortable with myself, I started to enjoy the attention! I would say, from age 35-52. (Now I too am invisible like MaryK so it doesn't happen anymore.) I could take ogling, staring -- I had a greater tolerance and I just chalked it up to male awkwardness. But -- I drew the line at touching/pawing and cat-calling. Or any kind of kissing/sucking sound when passing by. And even at 55 I would still be grossed out by that behavior.

As for you IK you look amazing in your outfit today! You have a very attractive, toned figure. You look better than a lot of models (harking back to an earlier thread of yours) -- really. I just think males aren't used to seeing someone in such fine shape. Even most young women don't look this good.

Some people are inappropriate no matter what. I wear unisex hospital issued scrubs. I once got a handwritten thank you card from a patient. He called me a sexy angel. I of course immediately showed all my coworkers the card. And thanked my lucky stars I never seen him since.

Well, I have to say I don't mind it. It's especially nice to get some attention both on days when I've really put in effort, and on days when I feel cruddy. When I've put in effort, It's nice to see it appreciated by someone, and when I feel cruddy, it's a little bit of a pick-me-up.

In your case, I have to say there was nothing inappropriate about your outfit whatsoever, BUT you do look like a gorgeous leggy vision in it, so some of your more awkward coworkers may not realize how ogle-y they're being as they admire the view. Not that I'm excusing rudeness or harassment, just saying that they probably don't think they're being as obnoxious as they are. I hesitate to write them off as a bunch of total pigs without any other sign of cruddy behavior.

I much prefer a guy just approaching me than being stared at, ogled and catcalled. Not that it happens often. I detest walking by lawn guys, construction workers and other leering idiots. And I never dress for male attention.

A couple of years ago, I was leaving the grocery store decked in hat and puffer, laden with bags, and a cute sincere dude chased me down in the parking lot. He said, "I know this sounds ridiculous, but is there ANY chance you're single and available?" I politely told him I was married with a kid, to which he responded, "Of course you are, I just would have regretted not taking the chance for the rest of my life." And he waved and walked off. Now THAT I didn't mind.

Yes! What Jaileen said. Don't like it but have noticed that plenty of men in the 50+ category are still looking. Don't like it but have a very well developed blinders on street face that only a rare person can breach.

Una, what an amazing story!

I love when men look. Always have. I don't like ogling - but looking? and appreciating? Absolutely!

I don't like leering, but I'm surprised that some of you mind *any* looking. I look at/appreciate men too, so it would be unfair for me to dislike the reverse! Plus, as someone who doesn't get a lot of male attention, I appreciate it more, as long as it's respectful. The thing I hate the most though is catcallers who not only catcall but then get angry if you don't respond to their catcalls. Looking is their prerogative but they have no right to demand any sort of behavior from me.

A lot of my male labmates compliment me on my clothing, so they definitely notice, and I've never minded that.

Yes, I like it.