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WIW - Everything is better in leopard print

nicoleb

(website)

Veteran

I wore this to work....Thursday? Thursday started out a good day and then went downhill. We're starting to have some problems with my son at school...and he's only in preschool! ;_; Academically he does great but socially...he's having troubles (quick to rise to anger etc). As a mom i just want to immediately fix whatever problem there is for him but obviously this is not something i can change overnight. We're doing quite a few things at home to help but if anyone else has suggestions/has went through this with their child i would love to hear them!

*deep breath* Alright, back to the outfit! How fun is this skirt? It's yet another awesome thrift find that i am selling but i had to wear it to work at least once. And the shirt is sheer with a neat Victorian (right? correct me if i'm wrong) print that is in velvet.

And of course, more photos + info can be found on my blog.

Thanks for looking (and reading)!

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36 replies

Latest reply was from nicoleb

san

Veteran

This is a beautiful and unique outfit. Striking!

Joy

Veteran

There's leopard and there's leopard..not all seem to be created equal, but this is an especially nice print with the detail of little pleats at the waist. How does one find your ebay shop?

taylor

Veteran

Everything is better when YOU wear this leopard!! gorgeous!

Your little one is probably not able to express himself/feelings in the right words .... frustration = anger...don't fret too much Mommy these things work out in time. He is only in preschool and they don't always adequately know how to communicate feelings until much later...he's normal and will be just fine I am sure.:) Helping him learn how to express what he is feeling instead of lashing out/hitting/yelling is just something all children must learn.

Sole Femme Trader

This is simply drop dead gorgeous. No ifs, ands, or buts. Gorgeous.

HelenInCanada

Veteran

The outfit is awesome! Meow!

Aw, I understand it can be tricky when our kids don't "adjust" to a new routine so quickly. Not having met your son or knowing all the details, from my own past experience as a teacher (and now a mom) I can tell you to be patient, encouraging, and positive and NOT make it a big deal in front of your son. Boys are well known to have a HUGE amount of energy (*ducking from the uber feminists), and sometimes, sitting and listening to story time or doing something that takes long periods of concentration can be VERY hard for them. They get restless. Nothing critical. It's preschool -they should be mainly playing, for goodness sakes! As long as he is not hurting other kids, his energy should be somewhat channelled into more physical tasks - building things, hide & seek, etc. I wouldn't worry too much - and good luck nicoleb!

Joy

Veteran

Taylor has an excellent point about your son's behavior. I've noticed that those who have a big vocabulary early are less likely to be the ones to throw a tantrum because they can express themselves and don't become as frustrated. Children figure these things out at different rates. He's still very young. Does he like to be read to?
Also, at his preschool are the children all expected to do things together? This is a hard thing to learn if he's not used to it.

Ginny

Veteran

Great outfit!! What a fun skirt indeed!! Hang in there with the little one, it is hard to adjust and I agree with Helen, hang in there and patience is the key, even tough it is hard!!

MsMary

Veteran

Nicole, you look beautiful!! What an elegant outfit!!

I have no advice about your little one, just some Mommy hugs for you!!

ManidipaM

Veteran

Nicole, what an unique outfit --- and so very you! L.O.V.E that shirt. Every time I open a WIW from you, I know there's a feast waiting for my eyes.

About your little lad, I think there are good points already made about the ability to express/vocabulary vs frustration. Also, as someone who used to be *that* child, I wonder if your son is perhaps a bit shy or introverted? If that IS the case, even with a great vocab and fabulous self-expression AND confidence (tall order in tiny tot just going to school!), he might find people around him are not patient enough to wait and hear him out, or that he simply does not want to communicate/interact as much as he's being led into. This too can be immensely frustrating as well.

What worked for me, I recall, was my mother teaching me to *ask* for a timeout when I felt overwhelmed --- you'll of course need his teacher to be on board for this, but this teaches him to (a) know that it is acceptable/frustrated to feel overwhelmed and he WILL be supported through it, which automatically reduces the fuel for anger, and (b) learn to watch for his own pre-outburst internal state and triggers, which can in themselves slow him down and defuse the situation sometimes.

Hope he's a happier bunny at school soon!

Vildy

Veteran

I love this kind of pattern mixing.

Claudia

Veteran

This is such a stunning outfit, just beautiful.

And hugs from one mom to another.

Jjsloane

Veteran

Gorgeous outfit.

Hugs on your issues with your son. Been there. At that age my son was also acting out a lot. One thing that seemed to help was we found he really missed having afternoon naps. He was tired. He also would not eat anything at lunch (picky eater) so he was hungry. If you've eliminated these issues, sometimes it's just growing out of a phase. We worked alot on how to handle anger with just walk away and positive reinforcement when he had good days (no reported incidents).

nicoleb

(website)

Veteran

Thanks everyone to the comments about the outfit AND your mom thoughts and ideas.

Jjsloane - this sounds a lot like my son. He still takes afternoon naps but on days he goes to school (2 days a week) he does not because he has afternoon class. He's also a really picky eater and gets cranky when hungry but because i know that i make sure to give him a lunch full of things he knows he likes to try to help avoid this.

Without making this overly long i'll give two examples of the times he's gotten himself in enough trouble at school to get sent to the office.

The first time he was building a bridge out of blocks with the other kids. He told the kids he would be right back to get something and asked them to not take the bridge down. He came back and they had and he doesn't handle it and got really upset. Teacher sent him to the office to calm down.

The 2nd time (this past week) he was playing with other kids at some kind of table the teacher had set up for them to explore. Teacher asked him to come do a different activity with her and he told her he didn't want to because he wasn't done playing yet. She said fine but next time they switched he would need to. She asked him the 2nd time and he yelled at her. And then in turn was yelling at the other kids because they were taking what he was playing with. Sent to the office. Teacher told my husband (i was at work that day) that two kids told her they did not want to come back to school because of my son. x.x

I've volunteered a couple time at his class but i guess i'm just going to keep it up as much as i can. At home so far we've talked about different ways to respond and alternatives of what to do and how to handle it when things don't go your way. We play board games because they're something no one can control who wins. We're currently reading a book series "Learning to Get Along" which deals with a lot of these issues. I've put on a play for him with his stuffed animals with different problems that arise and how to work around them. I'm going to talk to his teacher the next time he has class to see if she wants to sit down with me so we can talk and get on the same page so to speak, see if she has ideas etc. Both times he's gotten in trouble have happened on Thursdays, when my husband picks him up so i haven't been able to talk to her much about it.

Thanks for listening and again, for all your advice! Please keep it coming if you have anymore thoughts! Sorry that did end up being long. @_@

JennyAnne

(website)

Veteran

Agreed about the leopard print! I love the romantic, fun pairing you made. Very striking!

I hope you and your son can work everything out. I think that at preschool age, kids learn and change so quickly - hopfully he'll figure out better ways to express himself as you talk to him and he matures a bit. I'm no expert - just a fellow preschool mom. For what it's worth, when my son had some behavior issues earlier in the year, tying his TV time to his behavior that day at school (as reported by his teacher) fixed the problem very quickly.

nicoleb

(website)

Veteran

Thanks Jenny. Your thoughts are really helpful and calming. To hear my husband tell it, if he doesn't shape up he's going to be kicked out of preschool. It'll be good when i can go in and talk to his teacher myself.

Meredith1953

Veteran

You look gorgeous as you always do in all your postings! I don't have children so I can't offer any advice but what I am hearing from other people in this thread sounds like such good advice! Hope you find the tools you and he both need to overcome these challenges.

Sarah A

Veteran

outfit is great. In mpls (right?) I would recommend Julie Peters ECFE classes for a parent support group and tips. I believe these are free or very low cost and evening options are available. The daytime options are probably a different demographic as I think they were targeted at teen mothers trying to finish school. Anyway, she was my neighbor growing up and has been working in the parenting field for probably 30 years or more.

marianna

Veteran

I can't believe you're selling that skirt! It is stunning on you. The whole outfit is really gorgeous.

Anonymous

The toughness of the shoes and belt, the romance of the blouse, the fabness of the leopard. . . love everything about this!

I have no kiddo advice, but I'm sure lots of the mommies here will. You will figure it out, you're a great mom.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Look at you rocking those midis

LOOOOOOOOOVE! Elegantly edgy.

Ahem. Weren't you a nay vote to midis when they first resurfaced, Nicole?

Anonymous

This is the most beautiful, demure, sexy, feminine, appropriate, tough, cool outfit! I don't know how you do it! I love every detail. I can't believe you thrifted the skirt! The blouse does look very Victorian to me, velvet and lace? To die for. I love the artistic way you put your outfits together. And you are the ca-yootest model! I can't believe you're a mommy, too. I'm sure you'll get a great outfit together for meeting with your son's teacher.

You and your DH will figure out a way to help your son appropriately express his anger and deal with disapointment. It sounds like you're on the right track. My son had different issues, which I will share in the effort to distract you from your troubles.

I thought DS would NEVER get pottytrained. I couldn't believe that he was still in diapers when his sister was born (almost 3 years apart) and I was frantic. My BF (3 kids, all whom *self potty-trained* at around 18 mos) kept telling me he'd be fine, and it wasn't like he'd be going off to kindergarten with Pull-ups on. Well guess what? I had a kid who could hold it all through pre-school and wouldn't go poo until we put a diaper on him! If we didn't, he'd wait till we were distracted and take a dump in his pants while hiding behind a chair. I think he did the same thing all though kindergarten (not sure, I've tried to block the memories) and he was wetting the bed up til age 9. He is now 18 and really turned out to be a great kid. But like you, we had our challenges.

christieanne

Veteran

Love the bold and longer length skirt!

One more thing to think about for your little guy - does he have non-preschool play time with other kids of same age where he can practice getting along behaviors outside of school? He seems like he has pretty reasonable expectations (don't knock down my bridge) but could use support (which teacher may not be able to give on the spot) with problem solving.
Just a thought - these things do tend to work out so don't stress over it

Jonesy

Veteran

Your skirt is fab! Re. your son: I have a lot of thoughts about this. I teach child development and used to work as a social worker at a preschool, consulting with and helping teachers when they reported a problem with a particular child, conducting play therapy, etc. From what you have described (and this is just my reaction to that, not knowing anything else), to me it sounds like the teacher is the one with the problem.

Preschool-aged kids are quite volatile and can get riled up, get into disagreements, etc. many times over the course of the day. This is pretty normal, IMHO. Your son may be particularly sensitive, or get sort of loud when's he's upset (and of course I think it's great to try to help him build his skills, learn how to manage his frustration, etc.), but that's not that unusual for kids this age. It doesn't sound like he is being aggressive toward other kids or anything like that (and even that is pretty normal at this age). It's the teacher's job to be able to manage the child's behavior, role-model how to deal with anger/frustration, etc. This is a key part of what a child learns in preschool and a key part of the teacher's job! To send him to the principal's office makes no sense in the situations you describe: he feels like he is being punished and he doesn't get the opportunity to learn anything, and the teacher isn't doing her job.

Just my two cents, of course!

catgirl

Veteran

Outfit is PERFECTION!

My son went through a phase where he was overreacting to things. Part of it is that he's very insightful and any perceived injustice, even mild teasing, set him off. It's just part of the learning curve with social skills. Now he's completely over it and will probably be a playground mediator next year.

His school uses Kelso's Choices which are super-helpful to kids in learning how to choose from different possible reactions in resolving conflicts independently. You may already know about it, but if not here's a link:

http://kelsoschoice.com/

And a school link that lists them:

http://roosevelt.osd.wednet.ed.....ills/kelso

It works at home too!

Mochi

Veteran

Oh, this outfit is stunning. Absolutely stunning, nicole. Your style is truly unique and sophisticated yet totally cool.

Wish I had good advice re kids. They go through so many developmental stages so quickly. You are on top of it, and that's the main thing. It might take time, but you'll figure it out.

Scarlet

Veteran

Gorgeous combo! Really striking and visually rich. I am glad you could get some good parenting advice. I have none.

jenanded

Veteran

The outfit is wonderful! Hugs for the mummy as well

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

I neglected to mention in my first comment that I wish you the best with your little guy. It's so hard being a parent

Also, why on earth are you selling this amazing skirt? Do I need to spank your bottom.

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

Late but love the outfit!

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