I think that if the item you like expresses the real you and what you want to project is the real you as well, then you can find a way to incorporate the item. If what you're trying to project is not the real you (but maybe the fantasy you), then there may be a problem, and one that's bigger than incorporating an item of clothing. And also, there are things you may like and appreciate on others but not necessarily want to wear yourself.

Re: one-piece bathing suits and the loo - why is it a wrestling match? You pull the crotch part to the side and do your thing. Easy-peasy.

I'm in Una's boat on this one. I have very little chance to wear something that truly represents me. It's all pencil skirts and slacks and blouses at my stuffy office. I mean, can I get a casual Friday??

Alexandra - all good points. Also sometimes I think we like things because they touch parts of past and future "you's" but are not "you" right now. The girl who wore shortalls is not the woman I am right now, I remember her with fondness but I don't want to go back, I want to move forward. Nostalgia is powerful and I have nothing against repeating trends but it's not always best to repeat them in exactly the same way. I think the "fantasy you" is a really important distinction too. Love it on others but does not fit in our real world scenario. You have to respect that. Great insights!!

Liz - sounds like you really need a casual friday!! Is there some way to incorporating some of your style into this mix? Toppers? Accessories? color?

For me, I have a large fully functioning wardrobe. So fashion is all fun for me.

Melllls - may you always have many choices and goodies to pick from!! Nothing wrong with that!!

Hmm, my image is fashion or I should say Fashion with a capital F. But personally I find almost any item can be tweaked in the styling towards your goal. There have been some many times on the forum that people say I don't X item would fit your style, and then I prove them wrong in how I wear it.

Liz, even pencil skirts, slacks, and blouses leave a lot of room for self-expression. Your choice of colors, style details (collars and necklines, buttons and zippers, shape and structure, etc), and of course footwear, accessories - those are all ways to show who you really are. I mean, if people can express their personality while wearing scrubs, office wear is really easy.

Anna - I think that's absolutely true. If you want it to fit, you'll make it fit. But I think it requires a commitment to the piece that I may not have to those overalls. I don't love them that much. Although in another fabrication or perhaps skewing to more of a jumpsuit, in black, of course!!, I might find something that references them but is a more perfect and more versatile fit for me. But honestly, I don't think there is one piece of apparel that you could not manage to style and make look good!!
Alexandra - that is a really good point!! We had a resident who used to roll her scrub sleeves, peg her scrub pants, faux tuck her top and wear an interesting layering tee underneath or necklace and she always looked fab. Of course, she brought pressed clothes in dry cleaning bags,stillettos, stockings, and make up bag on call. She would charge up 4 flights of stairs in those heels while the rest of us were dragging. We had a pool going and no one gave her more than a month of this, wrong, she was dubbed the navy seal of fashionistas. She's now a very sucessful cosmetic dermatologist, are we surprised? Attitude is everything!!

Gryffin, your navy seal of fashionistas is a woman after my own heart

Alexandra, to the extent that I choose to wear pencil skirts instead of full, simple blouses instead of frilly or whatever, yes, I can make my work clothes my own.

The point is if I had my choice I would never wear any of those items. I'm a jeans and sneakers girl all the way. So I guess mine is not an issue of the image I want to project but rather the one I'm required to project if I want to keep my job.

ETA: So what I do when I come across an item I love that doesn't fit the image I have to project for work is I consider whether I can use this item for my casual capsule (much, much smaller). If I have too many pieces in that category already which happens a lot, I have to pass on that item even if I love it.

Another probing thread, gryffin! I've enjoying reading all of these thoughtful answers!

If a piece really doesn't fit with the image I want/need to project, and I really can't incorporate it to be authentically me then I guess I would give it a miss.

But ultimately, and possibly selfishly, the first person I dress for is me. So if I can't incorporate something I love, perhaps I'm not being honest with myself and not being authentic in the way I dress. That would make me nothing more than a mannequin. And I think people can tell.

Alexandra- regarding the bathroom and one piece bathers, I was thinking the same thing reading another thread! I just didn't want to be the first to say it........!!!

Liz, I don't quite understand the jeans and sneakers bit as those are not appropriate for most situations. If you mean a more relaxed, casual, natural style, then maybe this blog post by Imogen Lamport will help: http://www.insideoutstyleblog......laxed.html

Fuzzy - I agree with everything you've said, but I know sometimes when I love something, I love it in my fantasy life or on someone else. I think, at least for me, I need to always clarify why do I love it and it who do I love it for? If it's me, then I would probably have no trouble incorporating it into my style. When I look at a great denim button down, well I OD'd on button downs in high school - I really have an aversion to wearing them because they are so strongly associated with that time it does not feel authentic to me now, but I love them in other peoples outfit posts and I actually bought one, only to donate it. I don't know if anyone else has that particular challenge but I have to respect that I do and having a filter mechanism helps me prevent mistakes. But all really good points!!

Yes, I have had that problem too! I can appreciate lots of styles and items and would feel good wearing them without them being me enough to fit into the image I have of my style. And with a small budget and small wardrobe you have to take care that each piece works towards the overall look you want to have or you're not going to be happy creating outfits. I've actually found it much easier after I decided to just say no to the pieces that don't work with the picture I have in mind. It's a kind of freedom to just pass and makes shopping much easier. I can always enjoy seeing those items on other people.

Alexandra, I will respectfully disagree with your point and continue to live my life as I see fit, jeans, sneakers, and all.

Gryffin, sorry to thread jack.

Astrid - you are so eloquent. That's exactly what I've been trying to say (but very ill!!) A small wardrobe needs a point of view to make it cohesive. Following trends is absolutely fun but when we by things that we fancy but are not really "us" it all falls in to chaos!! Thank you so much for elucidating that!!
Liz - no need for apologies!! We are complex people and language has it's limitations. It's really hard to sometimes make others see the world through our eyes!! As much as we all try to empathize there are limits to our ability to be helpful. You know who you are and what you are about, that's really all that's important!!

Ohmigosh, Liz, re. one-pieces. I could totally freak my gypsy neighbor out telling her to do that. She threw out a free taco because the guy who bought it for her swung his dog's poopy bag over it... Lol.

I haven't read all the responses, but something about the words "image" and "authentic" just don't seem to go together for me.

"Image" is such a marketing word, and I am in marketing.

The truly authentic don't need to work all that hard to project an authentic image.

That said, this thread made me go google "fashionable overalls" and I came up with a lot, non denim. Polished, refined, etc. Cute!

Oh, sorry, gryffin. Perhaps I missed the point a little.....

I see lots of pieces that I know I could style and wear but just aren't quite me. Eg a little navy shift that I had envisaged taking into mod territory, and any heel over 10cm is probably best appreciated on other people and left to my fantasy dressing life.

The voyeur in me love to look, though and I appreciate lots of looks on others that I know I could never pull off- anything 'eclectic' with lots of patterns would give me conniptions by mid morning, and some of the less structured looks that Angie presents would look like a zute-suit-riot on my larger frame!

Does keeping in mind the words which you think define your style help you when shopping, gryffin? Sorry, long post but not much help

Shiny - gosh girl this could get really deep!! How do you translate what is wordless and nameless into something you can see and discuss? Did you ever stop in your tracks because something was so perfect or so beautiful and touched you so deeply and then try and explain why? I think we recognize what is authentic to us when we see it but trying to translate that into how we present ourselves, at least me (you are obviously much farther along the path to your personal truth and style) does require thought. I have to filter out from the vast choices and images I am bombarded with, which ones represent the authentic me. Not easy from my vantage point but I am so impressed it you have that kind of ease and facility!! Wow!!!

Fuzzy - I think this exercise is helpful to me because I love many things in theory but no one my frame or closet. I do not filter well. I'm like a kid in the candy store and Fuzzy, I love candy even though it's bad for me!! So I need a rock, an anchor, a touchstone. These threads are really helpful in reminding me to do that. It's not an exercise that works for everyone, but it's been invaluable to me! PS large frame? really? you give the impression of height but with a delicate, very well proportioned frame!!

I would say about 90% of my wardrobe fits my style persona and works with how I wish to project myself.

But I have this other 10% that is outside my norm and I love that 10%. It's what helps me to grow stylistically and makes my wardrobe individual. I don't want to be completely predictable and it's fun for me to throw in a curveball from time to time.

Gryffin - you have started some fantastic, thought provoking threads in the last few days. Thanks

But that would only be a sliver of the authentic you, not the whole "contains multitudes" you. It is that sliver which is you at that moment in time, a compilation of trends, culture, time period, body you happen to be in (fluctuating day by day), current preferences, rational choices, emotional factors (subconscious and unconscious), and on and on it goes.

And since you appreciate the philosophical:

Describing/labeling is a mind game, not a soul/spirit game. It is what makes us human, of course -- language, our stories. Your authentic self can never be described. As soon as you put words to that endeavor, you are now only looking at a fragment. This is why the zen & other spiritual masters tell you if you want to know God, or yourself, stop talking and quiet the mind.

As for image, it is projection. It is perception, the act of perception is what creates reality itself, and it takes two, observer and observed. So I'm not suggesting there's necessarily anything wrong with it, just that "authentic" is in the whole, not the parts.

Bwahahaha! I love the candy store analogy! I say have just a little candy, just a taste, incorporate it into the image you want to project and arrive at a place that is uniquely gryffin without the constraints of the boxes. If you wish to stay within a framework or box because socially that's where you need to be then do it one piece at a time with your staples.

Oh, and to develop a filter for what works and what is always going to be candy, I suspect it's a case of exploration and trial so that a pattern becomes evident to you. You know those people who just seem to be able to put an outfit together? Well, they've probably spent years developing that skill! I'm still exploring. The mod/shift dress went back. For now.....

Oh, regarding 'large frame' I was comparing Angie's smaller, delicate elven frame to my more muscular athletic frame- wasn't precise with the language. But it has only just gone 5am here.......

Shannon - in my style descriptors I have the word unique. It's really important for me to have the unexpected, authentic, whimsical surprise!! I think those ideosyncratic pieces are really important too!! No box, just guidelines!!
Shiny - but what about Blake's "One thought fills immensity!!" or "To see a world in a grain of sand and heaven in a wild flower Hold infinity in the palms of your hand and eternity in an hour." Yes, we try and name the unnamable, know what our minds can not comprehend - but it is in the trying that we find ourselves!! It is the spiritual journey that the quest leads us on that leads to our individual truths!! We may just journey differently but it does not negate the validity of the other's path. It just makes it more interesting!
Fuzzy - I agree and as I said to Shiny and in my style descriptors unique is one of my monikers. But I love how you've described it!! Wow, 5am and you are lucid!! I am impressed. I get up before 5 am everyday and that I am not articulate at that hour!!

Griffyn, see OT subforum --- I started a thread to continue the philosophical discussion, so as not to derail your thread here.

What a great thread. I have to go back and read the comments here. For myself, I like to stick to a core style/image and add the occasional wild card item to mix up my look. This way I can test out new styles without greatly impacting the harmony of my wardrobe.

It's so great to find people who analyze this stuff as much as I do. I love scarves, and approximately 99% of the time that I wear one, it looks stupid. I still buy scarves, because I live in hope that I will whirl it around and it will settle in such a way that I don't look like a turtle. In my mind, I look fun; in the mirror, I look messy.