It is, in fact, a family. Fabulous in every way. Father figure who takes care of everything and makes you feel safe, protected. Strong, loving mother figure who nurtures your strengths, helps you correct your weaknesses in a way that makes you feel empowered, sets the boundaries, challenges you. Then the siblings -- an amazing palette of characters, each beautiful in their uniqueness, each generous in sharing their life wisdom.

That family had adopted me some 7 years ago. Since then, in its nurturing embrace, I’ve gone from sheepish to happy dresser, gaining confidence in the area that was an extreme puzzle for me. Like a toddler stumbling while making those first steps and who suddenly had the whole world at the reach of my hands, I went through those early 'years' of trying to play with almost anything; to mastering alphabet and becoming a more skilled reader who could start separating better choices from obviously bad ones; to teenage years and clarification of the right descriptors that could envelope my choices and set path for the future; to an adulthood in which I no longer search for my style identity, but enjoy the process of deepening and refining my choices.

This final stage of growing up was not really planned, but it happened as a natural consequence of leaving home, or -- in forum speak -- as my participation significantly slowed down. It’s been obvious for some time, but with this thread I wanted to make it ‘official’ in a way. I did try to pick speed up occasionally, but eventually had to accept that I can not be around as much as before, at least not in the foreseeable future.  But as I went back to work after a long break, and the demands of off-line life were greater than I could have anticipated, three things became apparent.

First, most of the time I don’t think too much about what I wear, but all of the time I feel good. I’ve realised that being dressing in basic, simple clothes, is in fact my thing. I enjoy it. Only I know how deliberate those seemingly boring pieces are, and that’s enough for me to feel happy. What excites me is not so much what's trendy or new, but what's fresh or new to my eye.
Second, same as real-life families are ours forever, YLF will be under my skin forever. Things happen in my life and I compose threads in my head wanting to share the outfits or life news or dilemmas with you, which then never really get written - but the impulse, the habit to share with you are as strong as when I was around a lot more. What I mostly do lately is read the blog daily, and forum whenever I can.

Last and definitely not the least, my time here has given me tools and knowledge to recognise the joy that other women put in dressing themselves. The streets are one big fashion show, and things inspire me and fill me with joy thanks to my eyes being opened here. When I compliment someone, it always amazes me how quickly surprise of the other person turns to happiness, when their very private form of creativity is acknowledged and admired by a complete stranger.

Style conversations aside, there is a very personal reason why I will always feel strong bond with YLF. You are all incredible life mentors and I feel very proud to have found my place amongst you. Part of me has always felt incomplete because my mother did not live to see me as a fully grown up individual. Being accepted by you, a group of incredible women who radiate strong sense of self-fulfilment and know your own purpose in the world, had greatly helped to fill that void. There is absolutely no way I could have come across a community like this in off-line life, and to be able to actually benefit from your wisdom, intelligence and grace, is a privilege and my life is so much richer for knowing you all. My friendships and special moments from here are as real to me as they can be.

One more thing… in my random commenting in recent months, there were always lovely messages from the forum members who had known me from my more active period and I wanted to say a big Thank You - for being happy to see me, for not forgetting me. It means a lot. Which is also why I needed to address the fact that I am so rarely around. I still have and want to share a lot with you, and I will find time and way, but it’s a matter of balancing needs and wants.

Germans, according to an acquaintance, say that one builds three homes in a lifetime. If that’s the case, knowing that before YLF I’ve only been active in two communities many years ago and that this place had felt like my on-line home more than any other, I’m not going anywhere. Whether to even post a WIW or just report spam, I will be around -- just less visibly active.

Thank you, once again, Angie and Greg for YLF. 

Thank you YLF ladies for your friendship and guidance.

Love,
O.