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New member in need of overhaul. Hep?

MoiraBlue

Hello to all. I'm new to YLF, and in need of a complete overhaul. I've come out of a longish rough period in life with few clothes in my closet, even fewer that pass muster, and no clue where to start. I'm eager to start looking like I feel, and to have more confidence in my appearance. I guess my first two questions are these:

1. Style - I don't want to fall into jeans-and-tank mode, but I have no idea what my style is or how to go about putting it together. Are there store sites or other sites with pictures of various styles I can browse through to get an idea of what I like? My starting point: 33-yr-old SAHM, introvert, NOT confident. I like feminine and sophisitcated clothing, but have to wear stuff that holds up to a relatively active lifestyle with a 3-yr-old. I'm tall and slender and I *think* I fall into hourglass category best.

2. What to get first? I'm pretty much starting from scratch, and have a limited budget to rebuild with. My plan is to buy maybe one item a month, depending on what I can afford. Item #1 is going to be a dark pair of jeans that fit correctly, but where do I go after that?

What I have: two pairs of jeans, both too short, both embarrassingly worn. A pair of nice black pants that fit well, but which gather cat hair within the first 30 seconds of wearing them. Pretty gray slacks that fit perfectly, but with a hem come undone. A pair of ultra-wide-legged trousers which I love, but are 1-2 sizes too big for me. A handful of tops, only a couple of which are in good shape, flattering, and fit well. Two pairs of loafer-type shoes, one of which is embarrassingly old-lady-like. One pretty pair of black silk flats. Ill-fitting bras - my boobs sag after having a lil' girl, and my bras don't do a thing for them. An honest-to-goodness biker jacket, a gray pea coat, a dirty but gorgeous, fitted, light brown suede jacket. One purse, relatively new, snap already torn out, black leather with rich red-brown trim. "Gear." Not the cute kind. One hot pair of specs.

Many, many thanks for any advice you can offer, and apologies in advance for all the forum-hogging I'm going to be doing to get myself started.

Dressing

20 replies

Latest reply was from MoiraBlue

chewyspaghetti

Veteran

Welcome to the board Moira!
I'd suggest getting a good haircut and a bra fitting first. I think your idea of new jeans is also right on track.

marianna

Veteran

Welcome! I remember when I was first getting started Angie suggested a good haircut, fab handbag, and great shoes (and of course a good fitting bra!) After you get those inexpensive basics down, you can slowly start building your wardrobe. You should look at Angie's recent MOTG posts, I think you'll find them very helpful.

It's super hard building a wardrobe on a budget (I'm working on it right now) and my biggest advice is to check out stores like Nordstrom Rack. Some of my best finds have been from the Rack. Lots of ladies thrift as well, and it's something that I've never dared try, but obviously has great potential.

Good luck!

Queen Mum

Veteran

Hi Moira- welcome to the forum. I agree that you want to start with a good haircut, and a good bra, and a nice fitting pair of jeans-- a good bra will make all your shirts look tons better. Then go from there. Look at Angies MOTG post http://youlookfab.com/2009/10/.....on-the-go/ and make your shopping list from there. I wouldn't try to complete every single formula right away, pick the 3 or 4 that most interest you and start there.
I'd say, after your jeans, you want a cute jacket (not denim- don't wear denim with denim) and maybe a couple of scarves. A scarf will take any outfit from blah to wow in less than 2 seconds flat! Looking forward to watching you transform your style!

medusa

Veteran

Moira, welcome! And don't be discouraged. You can get a lot of great advice here.

I second the recommendations about starting with a bra fitting and a haircut.

I also noticed that in your list of current clothes, you have some things that could be revived with some help from a tailor or cleaner - you could have the hem on your gray slacks fixed. Could the wide-leg trousers be taken in? Maybe some of your tops could be altered to fit better? And the suede jacket sounds like it could be great if a cleaner could spruce it up. I'm thinking you could invest a bit in improving your current basics, and then you would have a great base to build on.

MoiraBlue

Looks like a good bra is a top priority. Can I trust myself to fit my own bra, armed with the right info? If not, where should I go to be fitted on a budget?

I recently got a great cut. The color leaves a bit to be desired, but I don't have another $200 to drop on color repair.

medusa

Veteran

Moira, I definitely recommend getting a professional bra fitting. Most department stores will do them free of charge in the lingerie department (of course, they encourage you to buy the bras from them once you are fitted, but you don't have to). I had a great fitting at Nordstrom.

Sarah

(website)

Veteran

I also use Nordstrom for fittings. This last fitting I was on a bit of a budget (I try not to be when it comes to bras, but sometimes that can't be helped) so I told the girl right away that I was hoping they had more inexpensive options for me this time around. My favorite bra ended up being Betsey Johnson, and cost around $30. Very do-able! I have had a lot of luck with Chantelle bras as well, and can usually find at least one good style on sale. Just leave it to the experts and they are more than willing to work with you.

RoseandJoan

Veteran

Welcome to the forum Moira, we are quite similar, I'm a mum of two aged 31, I have recently lost my baby weight and had nothing in my wardrobe which fit which was less than five years old. Three months on and I'm still a work in progress but I'm getting there.

You really have found a fantastic resource and guru in Angie to get your wardrobe working for you. Here are a couple of blogs which I found particularly useful

http://youlookfab.com/2008/02/.....ssentials/
http://youlookfab.com/2009/06/.....lifestyle/

I'm looking forward to your first outfit posts,

Julie

Ana

(website)

Veteran

Hi Moira, welcome to the forum! The ladies have given you great advice. I agree that a bra fitting and new bra is in order.

Did the salon color your hair, and you're not happy with the way it turned out, is that it? If so, you should go back and let them know. If there is something wrong with it, they should be willing to fix it free of charge, especially if you paid $200 to have it done in the first place.

Anonymous

Welcome, Moira. Several of us have had to start from scratch to make a wardrobe after losing a lot of weight. Start with the bra and Nordstroms is the best. My fitter found bras for me on their sale rack. You can also write down the information on the bras that fit best and look online or watch for a sale.
For clothing try thrift stores in nice parts of the city and consignment and resale shops. Be picky. Your best bets at these places will be slacks, pencil skirts, sweaters and buttondown shirts. They usually have them in abundance and in good condition. Good knitwear is more rare. If you go with a list of specific things to look for, you will be better able to focus.

Maya

Veteran

I also suggest a professional fitting but please please please don't go to Victoria's Secret. Most major retailers don't do a great job. Nordstrom is the only nationwide retailer that does a good job. Macy's might too.

If you want to try "self fitting," I recommend browsing around the Intimacy website for tips, especially this section:

http://myintimacy.com/bramistake.html

mummy2thea

Hi Moira, I don't really have anything to add I just wanted to tell you that I am also reasonably new to ylf, I joined around 3 months ago, unfortunetly 6 weeks of that I had no internet access, but even in the time I have managed to get on and post everyone here is very helpful! I too am a sahm (for the moment anyway) and know what its like trying to look turned out and stylish despite having a child hanging off you leg most of the day lol! I am sure that you will find ylf an excellant source of information, and hope that you are able to build up a great wardrobe.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Welcome, Moira! You’ve received superb suggestions so I’m just chiming in to say hi.

MoiraBlue

Wow, thanks so much for the helpful responses! I'm learning a ton via Angie's posts, and I'm really excited to put it together.

Regarding my hair: I'd been dying it at home for years, and finally got sick of the color and of doing it myself. I couldn't afford to have it done professionally on a regular basis, so I decided to go back to my natural color (a cool brown). There was the potential that it would take a couple of visits to take all the warmth out of my hair, but I could only afford the one at the time. The color itself isn't too bad; it's just warmer than I had hoped for, with cool roots. Three months out, it is getting warmer. I can see that you're right, though; it looks like I'll end up putting a couple of other purchases off in favor of getting my hair completely right.

I feel like I'm running around putting out fashion fires.

Does anybody have any tips on finding a particular individual style I like and can emulate? E.g., where would I find a collection of pictures of women in any one particular style genre? I've tried looking through some store catalogs, but they're mostly just pics of individual pieces. Sorry; I'm not quite able to articulate what I'm looking for.

MoiraBlue

Hi Angie, and thanks!

Queen Mum

Veteran

Moira,
Look at http://www.myshape.com
they have outfits classified in some different syle genres that might help you define what you like.
or, look through peoples posts here-- is there anything you have seen that you think "oh, I really like that and could see myself doing that..." ?

Ana

(website)

Veteran

Moira, I would recommend the book, "Lucky's Guide to Mastering Any Style." If you are just starting out, it will probably be a little beyond what you can swing right now as far as emulation, but it will give you a very defined idea of what constitutes a particular style, ie, what does "mod" look like? Or "American Classic?" That sort of thing. It's the best one I've found out there in this regard, and there are also lots of pictures which help.

chewyspaghetti

Veteran

Ana just posted about the book I was thinking of. It's not worth buying if you have a bookstore close by where you can just browse it- but it will probably be helpful.

One way to figure out your style preference is to look at the pieces you're drawn to. Go through a magazine, catalog or website and pick things that instantly catch your eye. Look at those things as a group and see what they have in common- romantic styles, clean lines, vintage feel, color palette, etc. You may also get clues from your house. I didn't realize that I liked simple lines with natural accents and ethnic influences until I looked at my living room. It sounds weird, but my day to day dress is really reflective of my decorating style, and you may find the same thing. There are a a million online quizzes that you can take, but I don't know if they are particularly accurate or helpful (or they weren't for me).
With a good haircut and a hot pair of specs, you are heading in the right direction from the top down! I'm on a pretty strict budget, too- and with on-going weight loss I am always in need of one thing or another. I hit all of the bargain spots- from ebay to thrift stores, sales racks, outlets, and closeout stores like Ross and Marshalls (and don't forget your coupons!). Don't leave any rock unturned in your search- you may be able to find some great bargains.

velvetychocolate

Veteran

I found a somewhat fun style 'quiz' online at the covet website:

http://www.covet.com/index

MoiraBlue

Thanks again for the tips and great resources! I'm starting to get an idea of the overall look I like, and am getting a baseline for putting some things together. If I'm clever enough with bargain finds, maybe I can put it together a little faster.