You're a very courageous compassionate lady. I can't imagine how hard this has been for you both. Hugs to you.

How amazing that you had that long and productive talk together. I will be thinking of you as you walk through this next piece of the journey -- but I haev confidence you will do it with grace and honesty. You're quite an inspiration, Michelle.

I'm glad to hear that the you were able to have that discussion, and that it went so well on both sides (understanding and mutual agreement).

Relieved for you to have this finally resolved - sounds like you are both mature enough to take the next steps in a compassionate, considerate manner toward each other and that will make things much easier.

Thanks for taking the time and energy to write this update. You must be exhausted after the emotional work you've been doing.

I'm so grateful that you were able to come to a consensus so quickly, even making the beginnings of an amicable exit plan. It sounds like your partner was able to move forward, too, due to your actions.

While it is wise to give yourselves time to make the transition, I suspect you'll be the one who continues to move the process forward. It sounds like your SO is in the habit of shutting down when things get difficult. I hope and pray that both of you can find new living arrangements that actually draw you towards them with the promise of a fresh beginning.

Hugs, Michelle. I continue to be in awe of your strength, compassion, and maturity. I know this must be hard, but your sense of relief at reaching a resolution comes through strongly as well. Sometimes the worst thing is not knowing, and now that you have come to a resolution, hopefully things can begin to move forward. Wishing you the best of luck and all the happiness you so richly deserve as you move forward.

The others have said what I think and feel with much more eloquence. I just want you to know you are supported and I wish you the best of luck as you make this change in your life.

So many others are so much better with words than I am. I wish you the best of luck as you make this change, and I hope for brighter days ahead for you.

A difficult thing, but c'est la vie. Live in the present, look forward to the future, yes?

Michelle, I've been thinking of you, and will continue to do so. I hope this closure and relief continues and that you will bravely venture out into the next stage of your life. And as always, even when you are telling us about something so deep and cruel as all this - I always admire your writing. I am sure your ability to verbalize things so clearly is helpful for you.

Michelle, I am sorry that you have to go through this. I am hopeful and relieved that you both came to a realization that will ( hopefully ) allow both of your spirits to soar now.

Much love and respect !

Hugs, Michelle. You're on the right path.

I'm so sorry... I am always amazed at how strong, self-aware you are! {{HUGS)) This is so much less than I wanted to say, but all I can come up with right now

Sending hugs!

Hugs Michelle! I don't have anything useful to add, but wanted to express my support and admiration also. Here's to the next phase of life!

Thank you, one and all, for your comments on this thread. They've been a source of strength during the past few troubled days. My emotions veer crazily from relief to total devastation. I can be exchanging witty text message banter with a friend one hour and sobbing hysterically the next. Corey seems to be in the same boat. His sadness is so difficult to witness. There are times when I even find myself wondering if we've been too hasty in calling it quits and if things could possibly turn around. I know perfectly well that the emotional dust needs to settle for us both and nothing definitive can be hazarded until well after that. That time can't come soon enough.

Michelle, if you were not caring and compassionate you would not be on an emotional roller coaster. It WILL get better, but the path there will not necessarily be enjoyable. But you know that. And I think you know in your heart of hearts that you made the right decision.

I've been listening to an audio book on decision making. To get a little distance and perspective on hard decisions, it suggests you think about what you would advise a close friend if she were in the same circumstance. It also suggested that you ask yourself how you would feel about a particular decision in: 1) 10 minutes; 2) 10 months; and then 3) 10 years.

Hang in there, and reflect on how you will look back on this in ten months and in ten years.

Oh Michelle, I missed this post! I kept checking back on the other one and was worried about how things might be going... I am so very sorry for the pain. I know well the bizarre and confusing mix of relief and grief. There is nothing like it for turning you inside out and upside down, and wringing you out in exhaustion. It can be so disorienting. I admire, as others have said, how beautifully you have handled it all. I don't know if this will be a comfort to you, but in my life I have learned to live peacefully with the sadness when it comes. I find it comforting - like a sort of proof of the value of what was lost. It becomes less of a "bad" thing and more of a way to feel fully alive and present in my reality... And it honors the humanity and enormity of it all.

Still... I just wish I could give you a hug!

Hi Michelle, I am so sorry for the pain of this time. I am thinking of you lots.

Michelle, you are so brave. Hugs to you and I wish you continued strength and courage. Be kind to yourself.

Hugs to you Michelle. It takes an incredible amount of strength and courage to face the elephant in the room. I have no doubt that you are feeling like a load is off your back for having taken this step. It will be tough going while your heart recovers from the grief, but you will get there. love sue