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I hurt - ETA stuff arrived - a note of thanks

Anonymous

When my OA flares up, as it is doing right now, I can't bear to wear anything but the loosest fitting clothes. It's gotten to the point where I think I'll have to buy flowy pants, but I don't know where to find ones that fit and don't look like something an old lady would wear. I prefer my fitted jeans combined with flowy tops--not the other way around. What do you all think about elastic waist pants? I don't own any, but I really need to feel comfortable. Help please.

Dressing

30 replies

Latest reply was from

carter

Veteran

Clothing should not add to your pain. I have a client who always (like everyday) wears JJill knit elastic waist pants with a long button front or knit tunic and comfort shoes. Add some pearls and a great bag and no one ever notices that she's wearing knit pants and ugly shoes! She has nerve and disc issues in her back and significant foot issues, so comfort definitely rules, but style never fails her.

abc

Veteran

Maybe look into JJill or Eileen Fisher? I hope you feel better soon.

Anonymous

Thanks. I'll check out J Jill. I'm also thinking about flowy dresses for summer. I don't normally wear dresses on a regular basis, but there's really no reason why I can't or shouldn't. It's my lower back and legs--all the way down to my toes--that kill me most of the time. I'm going to have to take a muscle relaxant tonight. That's on top of the 1800 mg of Gabapentin and 1500 mg of Nabumetone I normally take every day.

Joy

Veteran

I think you can be more comfortable and still be stylish. I recently bought some silky track pants at the Rack with an elastic waist. If the waist is exposed with a semi tuck, I plan to wear a belt, but an assymetrical fluid top worn out could work just as well. Try the upscale sporty look ...elastic waistbands, loose on the body, sneakers, oversized tops can be used.

Karie

(website)

Veteran

Oh you poor dear! I hope you feel better soon. I have heard good things about J.Jill and Eileen Fisher. Elastic waist upscale track pants are very comfortable and might work for you. I've also seen some nice looking elastic waist slim legged pants, and when worn with a flowy top no one would ever know there was an elastic waistband.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

Joy beat me to it I was going to say silk track style pants, loose tops & sneakers.

My clothes have to be comfortable or I won't wear them.

As Coco said: "Luxury must be comfortable, otherwise it is not luxury."

Gaylene

Veteran

Ugh, that's not fun dealing with OA pain. I think there comes a time where everyone has to start putting comfort and practical into the fashion equation. Whenever I read less than flattering comments about elastic waisted pants, I want to snark and say something like "Just you wait!"

To my mind, all waistbands are created equal; it's all in how you wear your clothes. My EF clothes look every bit as stylish as as anything I see on the streets--as a matter of fact, better than most! Joy and Caro are smart, AND fashionable; follow their advice and your fashion cred will be indisputable.

Peri

Veteran

Geez, Carter, am I your client?! I don't live near you, but you just described every problem I have! And pretty much how I dress too.

Bettycrocker, I am famous (infamous?) on the board for having to dress around pain issues. It isn't our fault and we do the best we can. And yay for Gaylene...I agree, most people will face this to some degree or another. So the camp who believes you must wear heels with your flares or you will look horrible, for example, just hasn't been there yet. I only wish we could dispense with the disparaging use of "old lady". If we are lucky we will all be old ladies, some of us sooner than later, and I don't think using those words to imply bad things, fashion or otherwise, is the height of kindness.

But I know you didn't intend that. I will add another vote to JJill, especially the Wearever collection, as having nice pants that can pass as decent looking, while feeling wonderful. Some days they are all I can manage and I hug them for helping my life work.

rachylou

Veteran

I feel for you. I love elastic waist, btw. Just don't buy them in beige from Lillian Vernon or Old Pueblo Traders and then wear them with a pink tropical floral.

Firecracker (Sharan)

Veteran

Aw, Bettycrocker, I'm sorry to hear this. I'm glad Peri chimed in, because she came to mind as someone who has persevered through pain issues and has maintained lovely style. Carter's story is encouraging to hear, and there is a lot of good advice here. Hang in there, okay?

Jeanie

Veteran

Sorry you are hurting. I was perusing this site the other day. The clothes are very modern but a lot of the clothes are very flow-y. I thought it might inspire some silhouettes you could try.
http://totokaelo.com/clothing/bottoms

Style Fan

Veteran

I am so sorry to hear this Betty Crocker. I also dress around chronic pain. I find it frustrating to balance fashion with comfort but it has to be done. Otherwise I will have clothing hanging in my closet.

I got very excited when Angie posted the high waisted cropped pants a few days ago. They looked comfy to me. There were some in linen that I liked (Theory). Very spendy though. I have also found some designers who make wide legged pants with elastic waists. I wear them cropped (I am 5 feet 7 inches) and I like that look though it is not popular on this forum. I have to wear flatter shoes for feet issues.

It takes a lot of planning for me to come up with outfits that are comfortable, fashionable and flattering.

I agree with Peri. I am lucky to be getting old.

Anonymous

Thanks, everyone. Rachylou, you lightened things up for me a bit. Peri, when I said old lady, I was thinking of the looks described by Rachylou. There has to be a more stylish way to work around chronic pain than that. Just saying!

At least I got the comfortable shoes part taken care of this past year. I just need to figure out the pants and how to style them with the tops I already have. It's going to take some doing, though.

Anonymous

Well, I visited J. Jill and found some nice seamed ponte knit pants on clearance that I think will be just right. They are a misses size that has a shorter inseam for misses but that will be just right for me, I think. Also, they come in a lighter color that I think will work well with navy, black, etc. While there, I took advantage of the sale and bought a really pretty cardigan I'd been eyeing for a while. I used a 25% off promo code on top of the 40% off sale to get my order total fairly low.

Ponte knit seamed pants:
http://www.jjill.com/jjillonli.....h&

Bloomsbury Topper:
http://www.jjill.com/jjillonli.....&sk=M

kerry

Veteran

Ouch! Good luck. You have a great attitude and sense of humour for dealing with chronic pain everyday.

Anonymous

I'm not completely sure what OA is an acronym for but it sounds horrible. From what other people have contributed I'm thinking it's chronic, peaking and subsiding so it's definitely worth coming up with a plan you like so you don't have to add wardrobe disappointment to an already challenging time!
While you are not feeling so well you could identify what type of clothing would be the most practical and comfortable. Then when you're in a good mood, look for styles that incorporate those details, like wider legs, softer fabrics, elastic waists, etc.
All of those details exist in stylish clothing and there's no reason why people looking at you would assume that you're making choices based on need rather than want. Be kind to yourself!

shiny

Veteran

I feel ya on that, Betty! Some solutions I've found -

Rag & Bone printed sweatpant jeans - I don't wear these to work but they are great for the weekends. Nobody realizes they are sweatpants.

Betabrand yoga pants - look like dress pants but are stretchy and feel like yoga pants.

LOFT ponte knit 5 pocket pants - these are not flowy, so YMMV, but they are stretchy and I am practically living in them lately. My go-to for business travel.

I just got a BR dress like this, but it's in midi length - which will look cute with flat booties:
http://bananarepublic.gap.com/.....=401444002

Shift style dresses are another favorite.

VC tube skirts are awesome.

EF slouchy pants. For winter, try their merino version:
http://www.eileenfisher.com/Ei.....rawstring+
I bought a pair in merino, they were much too big & baggy, the waist came up to under my rib cage, they were also too long.... but SO incredibly comfortable, so soft against the skin, so cozy and warm... I kept them for loungewear/sleepwear!!! I have been wearing them around the house constantly. Then my hubby accidentally sent them through the wash and dryer (I think they are supposed to be dry clean?). And they shrunk. To PERFECT size! So I will be wearing these out of the house now, for sure...

Catnip

Veteran

So sorry you don't feel good. I also have OA and various back and other problems. I am not a doctor, but wanted to let you know what helps me. On the advice of my physiatrist, I have been doing Pilates for about six years. If I do it regularly (about 3 times per week), the pain subsides and is nearly gone, although some slight stiffness remains. If I stop, the pain is back. Just a thought, but please discuss it with your doctor before trying it.
Regarding elastic waist pants, I wear them a lot. Eileen Fisher is my favorite, but I'm sure other brands will be fine if they fit well.
Good luck!

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

You've received lots of great suggestions on this thread already. I'm chiming in to say hang in there and take care. xo

Anonymous

Thanks!

Isabel, OA is the acronym for osteoarthritis, which is characterized by pain that comes and goes. My meds keep the pain at bay most of the time, but I have to break out the muscle relaxant for flareups.

Catnip, it kills me to lie down, so my physical therapist developed exercises for me--like yoga but not on the floor.

I think once I get comfy pants, I'll be okay. Wide pants don't look good on me, though, and I can't just think about what will work for weekends.

Everyone has given great advice to steer me in the right direction. I really appreciate it!

columbine(erin)

Veteran

How about some skirts? Sorry you're hurting.

crutcher

Veteran

Wonderful suggestions..I hope you find some really comfortable clothes...Have you looked at the Starfish collection at Lands End...These are super comfy looking...I haven't actually seen them but something like that might start the look and you can add your own chic touches...What Carter said about her client who is able to pull off a disquised comfort with chic on top...My best to you...

Vicki

(website)

Veteran

So sorry to hear you're hurting, Betty Crocker, and along with the elastic-waistband pants recommended here, I've recently purchased a few dresses from Ann Taylor and Talbots and I love them all. I'll post both here and they are very comfortable and will be great for springtime. Agreed, you can look stylish in flowy pants and tops. Would something like Activ-On ointment work when it flares up? Hope you feel some relief.

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Gigi

Veteran

Bettyc, I am so sorry that you're in so much pain. Being in pain is bad enough, period, but when you are also interested in dressing stylishly it hits you doubly hard.

The only thing I can suggest is to check Anthropologie. They often have wide-leg rayon-type-material pants that have drawstring or elastic waists. And they would have interesting patterns and such. I don't know what your budget is; Anthro is on the more expensive side. Free People might have some stuff like that too. Free People stuff is sold at Macy's as well as from their own site online.

ETA: I just read upstream, and I see that you said that wide pants don't look good on you. I am in the same boat. I hope you find something that works.

Anonymous

Thanks. I've purchased a few more casual dresses that should also be ok for work. It's the cold temps that get me, both for comfort (how many layers to feel warm in an unheated office?) and pain (heat helps). I think I can sort this out if I figure out, like I just did with the J Jill pants, where to find misses pants with shorter (but not too short) inseams. It's hard to find 29" to wear with flats and 30" for bootcuts to wear with 1.5" to 2" heels. Ugh!

tulle

Veteran

Hang in there, B. C. I hope you'll find a solution and feel better soon. Personally, I find most elastic waistbands to be more uncomfortable (and way less flattering )than regular waistbands in looser (sized up a size or two) pants with stretch in their fabrics. The Gap's 1969 black knit skinny jeans are extraordinarily stretchy and comfortable--can't feel the band at all. I also have some Christopher Blue bootcut cords--very handsome & office-appropriate--that have a completely non-binding waistband, thanks to the 2% spandex in the corduroy. At home, try the soft yoga pants that simply fold over at the waist, without any elastic at all. Elastic puts constant pressure on the lower back; I would avoid it.

Anonymous

Thanks, Tulle. Since my natural waist is high, maybe certain types of elastic waist pants will work. It's a looser fit I'm after, really. Nothing too oversized; just relaxed.

Elle

Veteran

I also recommend flowy track pants - Banana Republic makes a nice pair and so does the junior section of nordstrom (blanking on the brand name). They are very easy on the body. I also wear black yoga pants from Old Navy - with a long top you can't tell that they aren't work pants.

Good luck.

Anonymous

Thanks. I appreciate the recs. My mom had neuropathy, and ended up wearing a lot of elastic-waist pants and button-down tunics. The poor thing was worse off than I am because she refused to undergo any testing. Is it my imagination, or do older folks distrust doctors more than younger people? Since my pain started years ago and has gradually gotten worse, to the point where the pain is excruciating without meds, I had various tests done and visited several doctors. It took a while to figure out what it is (and what it isn't), but knowing what I'm dealing with makes it somewhat easier to manage. And I know I don't have cancer or anything. Anyway, back to my point...

I'd like to look stylish and still be comfortable to minimize pain. I so very much appreciate everyone's support and advice!

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