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Help please, I am so discouraged!!

50andstylish

Have 2 upcoming weddings and would like something fun and pretty to wear besides the same black dress (its pretty but I am sick of it) that I wore to the weddings last yr. I must have lost my mind because I ordered 3 dresses from JCrew and 2 from Anthro. and none fit. It is really depressing! Its me, not the dresses I know that. Granted the dresses were prob. too young for me (strapless and were shorter length than I realized) and given that I am a size 14...I should have known they wouldn't work. If any of you have any recommendations on possible dress options..it would be much appreciated. If this doesn't help me stick on my diet...I don't know what will.

Dressing

14 replies

Latest reply was from Kyle

chewyspaghetti

Veteran

Angie swears by a well stocked Macy's dress dept.- do you have one close to you?

50andstylish

Our Macys is very limited in every dept. I think it is fairly low rated so they don't send alot of stylish clothing. I will be in a larger city next weekend and will look but am open to any suggestions for actual dresses or styles or websites that you all can recommend.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Don’t worry! We’ll get you sorted and welcome to the forum. Remind me of your height, body type and whether these are day/evening weddings.

Thanks for chiming in, Chewy – a well stocked Macys is by far your best bet from a style and budget point of view.

Also, it's never your body - the dreses are at fault, not you :0)

crwilson

Veteran

Don't be discouraged! It was probably the dresses. I order a lot online, and I probably keep about 10% of it. It's just so hard to tell what's going to look nice without trying it on. Dresses are difficult anyway. What's your body type? What styles do you usually like?

50andstylish

Thank you, I knew that the women on this forum could understand how down on myself I am feeling. I am between an hourglass and a pear I think. I don't have a camera right now so am not able to take a picture; hopefully I can do so soon. Right now I don't feel like anything looks good on me but I can tell you what looks bad: a sheath style is awful for me because of big hips/thighs, one of the JCrew dresses was a wrap which I had high hopes for but it was to tight to wrap and tie and it showed way too much in the bust area (I am big on top and self conscious about that). I am blonde, fair complexion, 5ft. 7 and as I said about a 14/16. I would hope not to spend over $150.00 and less if possible. Again, my sincere thanks for your support.

Chris

I had a dress challenge last year and I understand the fit issue dilemma as well - we've all been there!
Talbots has lots of dress styles and is generous with the sizing so curvy girls can find things there. We have a Talbots Outlet nearby luckily as well.

Another website to check out is Igigi.com but they may run too large for you (I have never oredered but my cousin told me about it.)

Nordstrom.com is an option too if you don't have a store nearby.

Good luck to you!

shiny

Veteran

I'm 43ish and a different body shape (hourglass/inverted triangle) but have also been on the hunt recently, and it's been terribly frustrating. I have struck out COMPLETELY at Jcrew, Anthro, BR, and AT. And I mean completely.... I think I tried every dress on in these stores!!! I don't think my body is really all that difficult... maybe I'm just getting too picky... or hmmm... it may be true that I simply need more structure and yeah... my shape is maturing. If you know what I mean!

These are the brands I have liked and have had luck with lately:

- Nicole Miller
- Kay Unger
- Donna Ricco
- Calvin Klein

All seem to be designed with a more mature, curvy figure in mind.... a little more room for breasts... strategic ruching around a thickening waist... stretchy material... more substantial fabrics ("gut suckers")... etc. For formal wear, I especially like the styles with "stretch satin"... that is music to my ears because it means it is forgiving.

Since you are pearish and like the idea of wrap dress, and you're not petite like I am, I will add in Diane Von Furstenberg. Love DVF but DVF doesn't like me (I'm too short).

Some of the above are above your price range, unless you hit a sale, but if it's a dress you think you'll get years of wear out of (for example DVF would work not just formal events but for everyday), maybe it is worth spending a little more.

Let us know what you find!!!

shana

Veteran

Don't be discouraged! I think many of us have felt the same at one point or another. There simply is no standard when it comes to women's bodies! Macy's sounds like a good bet - I bet if the ladies on the board can give you some ideas on styles to try, you can probably hit up that bigger Macy's and try on a bunch of dresses to find the right one(s). Good luck!

shiny

Veteran

One more to add... Adrian Papelle (I may have spelled that wrong). Very popular at the moment is this v-neck with tiered layers look. It is highly flattering (at Macy's this weekend I saw three very different women try this style on, and all looked fantastic) which is probably why it is everywhere (and copied by other designers too).... I would buy one of these dresses but I fear showing up to a formal event and seeing every other woman in this dress. Am I being paranoid about that.... I don't know! If you go to Macy's, you will see what I mean. At least... at my local Macy's, it seemed about 20% of the dress section had dresses in this style?

Example:
http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/30.....0&P=1

bella

(website)

Veteran

Sorry to hear about your dress troubles. I just wanted to add a small note to Shiny's post that dress she's talking about is Herve Leger's signature look and has now apparently been recreated by other designers.
These are the originals on a bunch of celebrities:
http://www.catwalkqueen.tv/herve79058639.jpg
http://img175.imageshack.us/im.....ianxv5.png
http://media.photobucket.com/i.....gerRed.jpg
I am not normally this fashion-obsessed. I have been seeing these dresses everywhere as well and they seem to flatter every figure.

50andstylish

Thank you and will appreciate any other ideas any you have. I have seen the "tiered" dress and heard it was flattering but just thought it would make my wide hips look even bigger than they are. Maybe I will work up my courage and try the style on if they have one in my size. Have any of you who wear a 14/16 tried this style, what did you think?

I have one A. Papelle dress (the black one I wore to 2 weddings last yr.) and I love it, just tired of always the same one dressy dress. I do think larger Macys will have some other designers you suggested Shiny.

I am glad others are echoing my frustration with my "go to" stores of B. Republic, Anthro, J. Crew. I think their buyers should look at blogs like this to see what their customers like/dislike. Granted I can still find wonderful separates at Anthro. and JCrew (not sure what B. Republic's problems have been lately??) so maybe if I cannot find a dress I should look for a beautiful skirt/jacket or top.

Kristen

(website)

Veteran

Hello! Sorry I am late to this thread! It's funny, because you described yourself and you are EXACTLY my coloring, height, and body shape! I am about a size smaller than you now, but I've been hardcore dieting since January and I *just* moved out of the 14s.

I too have been on a dress hunt, for work and for play, and it can be discouraging. I have had a lot of luck with Ann Taylor Loft and Ann Taylor Factory Outlet, and I was recently very pleasantly surprised at how many suitable dresses I found at our low-rent horrible Macys. (If you haven't been in yours in a while, wander through just to see. You might be surprised too!) Try Nordstroms as well when you are in the city.

Most of what I have found so far has been black, but there's such variety in them I've been okay with that. Here are some photos and/or links:

Alfani at Macys: http://www1.macys.com/catalog/.....x-xx.index

On me (under a cardigan for work): http://www.flickr.com/photos/k.....552470668/

ATL lantern sleeve dress: http://www.anntaylorloft.com/c.....ory=Misses

(I haven't posted any photos of it yet, but it is FAB. I was thinking about wearin it today!)

AT Loft polka-dot dress (this sold out within a week, sorry. But there are lots of polka-dots out there still): http://www.flickr.com/photos/k.....683817607/

AT Factory brown a-line with white bottom. I ended up returning this because I got smaller than the size, but it was still available at ATF when I went there last weekend. I loved the structured feel of it!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/k.....683817607/

ATF blue-and-black patterned knit dress. This is going to be my go-to dress of the summer. I love everything about it. Also still available at ATF.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/k.....203863601/

Banana Republic also has a number of their dresses on sale right now, and you can get your size online from them. I do a lot of ordering and returning with all stores; don't be afraid to try! You can always return it.

50andstylish

Good news...I may have found a dress. Was out today with a friend at 1 of the 2 boutiques we have in our small town. Told the owner what i was looking for (she and i have similar body shapes altho she is mid 30's). She suggested this beautiful pink knit dress that had a sort of smock top, empire waist and then a same fabric as the dress tie that sort of "dangled" down the front. I had absolutely no expectations and it ended up being a great color and I liked it. I will def. wear a jacket or cardi over it (I actually have a new white BCBG eyelet "coat/jacket). The brand is called Zen-Knit, have any of you ever heard of this brand? It was under 100.00, their sizing is from S-XXL.

Thank you for all of your support and suggestions.

Kyle

Veteran

FAS:

Persistence will pay off for you and you'll look like a star at the wedding. So don't settle for anything you don't love or that does not make you feel fab.

I think a wrap dress might work well for you -- and a wrap is so versatile.

Also, check this out online. Nordstrom has a guide to lead you to dresses appropriate for your body shape. Some of these are quite nice:

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/30.....in=related

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/29.....8&P=1

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/29.....8&P=1

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/29.....8&P=3