I only get the earaches in winter, but my hats or scarves have to cover the very front part of my ear--where the wind gets in--for it to work. Is that what you do as well?
Here are some things that have worked for me:
A beret--a big, slouchy one, pulled down, with most of my hair tucked in, so my ears are covered.
A knitted or fleece headband, worn fairly forward to cover the ears (what I usually use for skiing.) As a variation on this for summer--I have seen a Pinterest pin somewhere that was a summery looking headband, made by braiding together pieces of a cut-up T-shirt into something resembling nautical knots.
A large square scarf, tied under the chin Babuschka style (like the mod girls did in the early 60s movies to keep their hair tidy in convertibles).
A really large square scarf, tied like a turban African style.
A rectangular scarf, much smaller and narrower than a pashmina, tied like a 60's style headband at the hairline, with the long ends trailing back at the nape of the neck.
I love wide-brimmed hats in summer--or any time really--but they don't cover the ears, or stay on in the wind. Well, except for the style that has a wide ribbon or scarf tied around the front of the brim and then passing down through it to tie under the chin--that would work too.
Other ways are possible but don't suit me: tiny bandanna scarves tied to knot at the nape of the neck make me look like Dopey the dwarf. And ear-warming woolly hats--the helmet and ear-flap and Peruvian dangly-braided-bits-by-the-ear styles that were "in" before the recent spate of tuques and "beanies".
As for being unable to find any square scarves: if you really can't, then cut up a pashmina into squares.
There's a blog called MaiTai's Picture Book, that is entirely dedicated to new ways to wear square silk scarves. She may have some for you as well.
