Faux pregnancy: draping makes all the difference! (apple pity party) - YouLookFab Forum

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Faux pregnancy: draping makes all the difference! (apple pity party)

goldenpig

(website)

Veteran

Ok, I have been debating whether or not to post these pics because they are so embarrassing, but then I figured we could all learn something from this, so here we go. As an apple, I have a love-hate (mostly hate) relationship with my belly. That all changed during my second and third trimester of pregnancy, when I was able to finally flaunt my belly and celebrate its sheer bigness! But now that I'm not pregnant anymore, I feel like I have to hide it again. I'm still about 8-10 lb over my pre-pregnancy weight, but I can fit back into most of my old clothes again. People are always commenting on how I don't look like I just had a baby 4 months ago, but they don't realize it's because of the way I dress. I've been working extra hard to hide it (although I'm too lazy/busy to work extra hard to get back into shape, LOL!).

I ordered this seahorse maxi dress for my upcoming party, but it was awful on me. I looked 4 months pregnant instead of 4 months postpartum (see #1 for the full faux preggo effect!). I would have loved to have worn this dress while I was pregnant. I kind of wish I was still pregnant so I could celebrate my belly instead of trying to conceal it all the time. Waah, I miss having an huge tummy. When I first got pregnant, I was so afraid of having to dress my bump, but now I feel like it was so much easier when I had a big one. Isn't that bizarre? Do any apples really love their belly and apple-ness or is it always something to minimize and "work with"? I'm not fat or body dysmorphic, I just have a (relatively compared to the rest of me) big tummy and now I don't have any excuse for it anymore.

Anyways, onto the lesson. I had posted something similar about draping for apples a year ago, using this dress as an example. I wore it today (#4), and yes, it still works very well for my shape even though I'm a few pounds up. What is the difference between the empire dress in 1-3 and the one in 4? They're very similar but the red one has a lot more draping and a side knot. Let me know if you can analyze the difference further, but as far as I can tell, cut and draping make all the difference between looking elegant and enceinte!

Thanks for your comments and for indulging me in my apple pity party. OK, back to chin up and carry on!

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Dressing

26 replies

Latest reply was from

Anonymous

I think you are being a little too hard on yourself! It's only been 4 months!

I don't think this dress makes you look pregnant. I think if the waist was cut a little lower and the skirt flared you'd be quite happy with it. But it certainly isn't the disaster I was expecting from your comments on the other thread!

I think you just have to be extra careful in avoiding apple-enhancers like the empire waist etc. for the next little while. Part of your frustration is probably your gorgeous nursing rack, which makes it hard for some of your workhorses to fit right now.

ManidipaM

Veteran

Thanks, GP! I'm bringing a cheesboard to this pity party, because...duh...me too!

I wondered the same thing about celebrating apple-hood. And figured I'll settle for ancient Indian artists' celebration of the slight below-the-navel pooch at least. (Traditional dance attires and many saree drapes still highlight the softer, rounder lower belly here, though it is no longer---unhappily for me---mainstream. And for many modern adherents, the postpartum apple is still a problem because the saree also exposes stretch marks and linea nigra to scrutiny... and societal disapproval. sigh...)

I think one other trick to the second dress is the more built-up bust---draws attention away plus changes belly-to-bust proportions with the pleats, no? With the seahorse, the below-bust band does the exact opposite.

PS: The print is a win, though. It would be harder still to bring off with a flat colour unless very dark. Wonder if the hand of the fabric contributes too?

Lantana

Veteran

I think the key is the draping on the bodice of the pink dress. It draws the eye diagonally down your body, past the empire waistline and down along the drape of the skirt.
Whereas with the first dress the eye is drawn to the deep v of the bodice and straight down to the tummy.
That's my theory, FWIW.
My other point is that there is nothing particularly maternity looking about the first dress - that is, except for the seahorses, which really do always look pregnant.

Mochi

Veteran

Pregnant or not pregnant, being an apple is tough. It's a grass-is-greener phenomenon, but I am rather jealous of pears. At least you do have a beautiful, well-defined waist, Natalie! And really, your belly is small. AND it's post-pregnancy, and just needs time.

Heidi Klum said she loved being pregnant because she could flaunt her belly, rather than trying to suck it in.

Makrame

Veteran

You look pretty good in that seahorse dress! But the dress in #4 is a winner, of course! I definitely hide the "faux-pregnant bump", not because I think it looks all that bad but because I don't want to confuse anyone. I have not been as successful at finding drapy dresses (I have one that works - I think it was your find, Michael Kors faux-wrap dress - but many others are still problematic. For me, pencil skirts with loose tops or fitted jackets worn over woven tops work well.

Agnes

You are being too hard on yourself, you do not look pregnant in that dress. It took nine months for your body to get your baby ready and realistically it takes as long to go mostly back to how it was. I always had a little belly and do have more since I had a child. I don't love my belly but I don't hate it. Just remember if something doesn't suit your shape, discard it. But keep loving yourself.

ironkurtin

Veteran

I was watching True Blood last night, where Tara becomes a vampire and starts wearing serious slutty bondage gear. That woman is beyond fit - and she STILL looks like she has a bit of a tummy if she isn't in a corset. Her waist is thick. It's how her torso is made.

Don't be so hard on yourself! We all have to dress to hide figure "flaws." My stomach is my biggest bugaboo, too.

Betti

Don't fret about your belly, it's only been 4 months! It will take time to shrink down, and it will, but of course it will never be what it was before pregnancy (lol, the badge of motherhood). Did I read that you're nursing? That is the BEST way to get your body back, in my experience at least. Relax and enjoy this time with your baby

You really do look fabulous!

Joy

Veteran

I think the diagonal line of the draping across the belly of the last dress is the secret. With definite apple tendencies that only get more pronounced with osteoporosis (less height = more pooch), I'm joining your party and bringing a bowl of mixed nuts (low carb to lessen more belly fat)
ETA: And you are being too hard on yourself. It may take longer to get your shape back this time.

Sara L.

Veteran

I don't think the first dress makes you look pregnant although it's not as flattering on you as the red dress. My motto has always been "nine months on, nine months off".

modgrl

(website)

Veteran

Natalie, I hear you! I had two c-sections and my belly bump never went away... that's how I got to YLF in the first place. People kept asking me if I was pregnant and when I was due when I was 2 years post-baby. That was really depressing! I have learned every trick there is for trying to minimize the apple effect. I am still super self conscious of it but over time I've learned what's worked for me. I try to stay away from empire waists. there's no way to not look pregnant in them.

nancylee

Veteran

I actually love that maxi on you, Natalie, and don't really think your tummy is that pronounced in it. Maybe you're feeling a little self-conscious because you know you still have a few pounds to lose post-partum. I think you should keep it and maybe wear some shape wear with it until you feel better about your tummy (which isn't nearly as big as you think!).

I agree with Lantana that it's the draping down the front of the pink dress that draws attention away from the tummy. It's subtle, but it does make a difference.

Jules

Veteran

Honestly - I'm not an apple but neither is my belly flat. And some clothes just really accentuate the belly. Having weight in other (pear) places doesn't mean I magically don't look pregnant in certain clothes IYKIM. At 4 years post partum and rouding the corner to 40, I find the possibility of looking pregnant to someone is not as bothersome as it would have been at 4 mos post-partum. I think both your body and your eye will adjust, gradually.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

I was JUST thinking yesterday that you look SO INCREDIBLE it's utterly sublime. 3 babies!!!! And you look like this after 4 months and at 40??? WOW, is all I have to say. And I say you need a place in the Guinness Book Of World Records too. xo

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

Natalie - I think you look utterly AMAZING! Don't you dare get down on yourself, ok?

I'm with Rita - I never wear anything with an empire waist because it just emphasizes any belly. I love dresses like our Maggy London black/white faux wrap because it emphasizes what we want to show and hides what we don't.

Parsley

Veteran

Natalie, just echoing that you look fabulous in BOTH dresses, although I do think the red one is more flattering.
But honestly, the first thing I notice in the maxi is how busty you look, not your belly! Ah, the benefits of nursing!
I DO understand firsthand the challenges of camouflaging one's midsection! But, really, you have an amazing figure, and you dress in a very savvy way for maximum flattery. You always look stunning!

goldenpig

(website)

Veteran

Thanks guys! I know I'm right where I need to be, even ahead of schedule (it usually takes me a year to get back to pre-pregnancy weight). All this weight has just fallen off of me because of nursing. And I don't even exercise. Thanks for the boost, and for letting me vent!

Raisin

Veteran

I'm always in awe of how great you look in all your post baby pics. I hear ya on it being so much easier to just flaunt the huge belly, but rest assured you do look great and you are dressing in such a way that you are flaunting all your best post baby assets!

Thistle

Veteran

You look amazing!!

Three babies, 40 years, a full time demanding job, demands of children and DH? Lady, you are beyond rocking it!

You look spectacular and not even remotely pregnant. I am amazed you are only 4 months post partum! I would have thought a year or more. You really do look terrific.

rae

(website)

Veteran

I am not an apple, and DH is the first one to say I look pregnant in that style of dress! Empire waists are the Big Tummy Evil, I say! While the red dress is also sort of empire cut, all the ruching creates lots of vertical/diagonal texture lines that keep you long, counteracting the empire waist. If you look at your sheath dresses and even the asian jellyfish dress, you look just as perfectly thin there, too.

To sum up? Your figure is totally amazing! It is the dress, and not you. It would make anyone who is not 7 ft. tall and willowy look bad.

Diana

Veteran

You look amazing. It's totally the dress that doesn't get you. Honestly, like Rae says, everyone looks pregnant in that style of empire-waist jersey dress.

I'm not an apple and dresses like that make me look like I am pregnant too. It's funny, I too am super sensitive about belly pooch, even though objectively I know I don't have much of a belly at all. On the other hand, I have a pear butt and I don't care at all that it's big (except when I can't zip things up there, LOL), I even sometimes dress to emphasize it. Go figure.

Aziraphale

Veteran

Aw, Natalie, don't be too hard on yourself. You really do look fantastic, and I'm not just blowing hot air.

The fact is, dead flat tummies on women are rare. Most of us carry a little layer of fat there. Add to that the fact that you are a mere 4 months postpartum. My belly took FAR longer than that to shrink back to some semblance of what it was before! (And even before pregnancy, it was never dead flat).

As for feeling like you need to choose clothes to hide your belly -- we all do that in some way or other. It's different body parts for different people. Some of us want to minimize the belly, some want to elongate short legs, some want to conceal saddle bags...but we've all got something.

IKWYM about pregnancy belly vs. postpartum belly, though. In mid to late pregnancy, the belly is big, yes, but it's firm and the skin is taut, and you feel all healthy and glowing and...fecund? In a good way. And you get used to that. Then the baby's out, and there's all this extra skin, and the muscles haven't finished tightening back up, and your belly feels like bread dough. And on top of that you're waking up at night to feed the baby, so you're quite tired. No wonder it's so common for postpartum women to feel frustrated!

For me, by the way, 4 months postpartum was always the lowest point, in terms of feeling blah. So really, you're looking amazing!

AviaMariah

Veteran

I think that seahorse dress is beautiful and looks great on you! Maybe you're being too hard on yourself. After all, you're not going to walk around with your hand under your tummy like in pic #1.

Sylvie

Veteran

I have to tell you Natalie, I have an empire waist maxi very similar to yours, I've never been pregnant and my belly looks exactly the same as yours in that dress.

I see why the second dress is more camouflaging, but it would be really unfortunate to cut out empire waist dresses just because we've got a little belly fat.

Kristin L

Veteran

I think you look great in the seahorse dress.

Anonymous

I personally like the blue dress very much don't be hard on yourself you look fab!