https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Wed, 22 Apr 2026 23:05:02 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1677425 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 23:10:29 +0000 JAileen 1677425@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Barbara, thank you for sharing your experience. When I talked to my neighbor she seemed very happy. She's more than my neighbor, she's really my friend. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1677404 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 22:40:42 +0000 Barbara Diane 1677404@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I took so long to write my response, I hadn't seen that you RSVP'd. And how lovely that you offered rides. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1677400 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 22:39:11 +0000 Barbara Diane 1677400@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Invitation lists are so hard! I avoided having parties for my birthdays because I couldn't stand it!</p> <p>Weddings are really hard. We weren't invited to either the wedding of our Best Man's son or our Matron of Honor's son. We were initially very hurt, but in truth, we were not close to those kids. And one of their brides wanted a very small wedding. And for the Matron of Honor's daughters, who I knew more, and whose wedding my friend had more control over, we were invited.</p> <p>And for one of my Matron of Honor's daughter's wedding, there was a same day cancellation, and my friend asked my parents if they'd like to attend. My parents were thrilled, and I also think it was a non-political choice. She didn't risk asking someone who had just missed the cut.</p> <p>So, I say, the choice is not whether to go given the late notice, but whether you want to go. Where are you on the desire to go scale and on the obligated to go scale? And if it's more that you feel obligated, examine if you should feel obligated.</p> <p>I love the joyousness of a wedding. I don't do heat well, but it was worth it for the one I went to. Think about water, hat, fan, cloth that can be wet with water from your water bottle, etc.</p> <p>P.S. I also spent way too much time stressing about what to wear to that outdoor wedding. I think I was the only one who cared/noticed. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1677379 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 22:24:42 +0000 JAileen 1677379@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Unfrumped, yes, it was great to get Mary's list! Maybe you could start a new thread, asking people for their rules for life.</p> <p>I just RSVP'd, and talked to our other neighbors who are in their 80s, and offered to drive them. The wedding is at a ranch an hour drive from here. Today isn't too hot, it's only 80, but 20 mph wind. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1677349 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 21:56:18 +0000 unfrumped 1677349@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>JAileen, you are already on the right track but I will chime in anyway.<br />I have a bad problem of trying to imagine what someone was thinking and imagining the worst, typically paranoid ! My DH cannot fathom it but he patiently says, I doubt that, probably not, that seems unlikely...to get me to realize that 1, it's probably <u>not about me</u>, and 2, it doesn't <u>do any good </u>to ruminate.</p> <p>Anyways, the other thing that becomes more apparent as one, ah, ages, is that friends can be hard to make/keep and even a modest friendship is worth some investment of time &amp; energy and that&nbsp; might lead to some good thing. Plus weddings are by nature likely to be happy--sorry about heat, though. </p> <p>Hot, outdoor weddings seem to be all the rage with brides now, and my DD had one, though we got extremely lucky and it was only "warm" and the setting was quite picturesque, &nbsp;and there was an indoor escape available. So you may sympathize with the MOB that that may not hve been her choice!</p> <p>Plus you started a great thread to get MsMary's list, and now I want to go work on creating mine, for what may be a next chapter in my life!</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1677196 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 16:29:40 +0000 Ledonna N. 1677196@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Mary this is so so so good </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1677175 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 15:57:02 +0000 JAileen 1677175@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Helen, you're so right!</p> <p>Mary, I generally don't make chair noises, but my Jack Russell does! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1677147 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 14:37:43 +0000 MsMary 1677147@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I swear, "no chair noises" is the hardest one! But I think it's the most important because otherwise you end up like my mom, who moans and groans and sighs every single minute... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1677046 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 10:56:42 +0000 Helen11 1677046@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>So many wise women here, JAileen : )<br /> So kind of Ms Mary and LF to share her rules. Now I want to know Rachylou's!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1676993 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 07:02:40 +0000 rachylou 1676993@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>OT on OT - I'm such a smart aleck, I see this now. StyleFan - my version is 'Maybe it's YOU.' Lol. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1676948 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 04:47:52 +0000 JAileen 1676948@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Amy, I'll be doing an outfit post soon. I know, chair noises! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1676868 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 01:46:48 +0000 minimalist 1676868@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>No chair noises?! Never heard of that before but it's a good one. I'm going to implement it, just for myself. Thank you, MsMary!</p> <p>JAileen, I'm late to this round, but look forward to your outfit selection for the occasion. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1676828 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 00:28:05 +0000 JAileen 1676828@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Mary, thank you! </p> <p>Sally, thank you, too. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1676816 Fri, 10 Jun 2016 00:01:42 +0000 MsMary 1676816@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm here! Some of the rules are a little obscure but here they are:</p> <p>1. Be kind.<br /> 2. Don't be poor.<br /> 3. Use it or lose it.<br /> 4. Have young friends.<br /> 5. Look where you want to go.<br /> 6. No chair noises (i.e. don't sigh when you sit down or get up).<br /> 7. Presume good intentions.<br /> 8. Do the right thing.<br /> 9. Never assume the ball is dead.<br /> 10. People are not improvement projects. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1676769 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 22:59:11 +0000 Sal 1676769@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am pleased you are going JAileen, I agree with what the others have said. &nbsp;Weddings are tricky with lots of people to please. &nbsp;</p> <p>I am also interested to hear the rules from Mary. &nbsp;Thanks Style Fan for adding yours and Rachylou.</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1676742 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 22:36:35 +0000 JAileen 1676742@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Style Fan, is that one of your rules - don't take it personally? If it is, it's a good one. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend/page/2#post-1676676 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 21:26:38 +0000 Style Fan 1676676@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes I want to hear Ms Mary's rules too.&nbsp; Don't take things personally.&nbsp; It is not about you.&nbsp;&nbsp;Another one of mine.&nbsp; &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676593 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 18:59:32 +0000 JAileen 1676593@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>AviaMariah, thank you. I know, I want to hear the rest, too! </p> <p>Mary, yoo hoo, what are other rules? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676592 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 18:58:10 +0000 AviaMariah 1676592@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I was just going to say basically what everyone else did. &nbsp;But now I also want to hear the rest of Mary's rules as I love #7! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676575 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 18:30:16 +0000 JAileen 1676575@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ledonna, BC, thank you. You're both absolutely right. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676571 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 18:24:44 +0000 Anonymous 1676571@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I agree with everyone who tells you not to make assumptions. Go to support your friend. You might end up enjoying yourself. ;)</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676564 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 18:02:19 +0000 Ledonna N. 1676564@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It's the darned "what Ifs" speaking to you.&nbsp; You just tell them to be quite because you are going to support your friend.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676414 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 14:10:46 +0000 JAileen 1676414@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Delurked, I am friends with the MoB. You may be right about the list.</p> <p>Style Fan, I guess list agony is common. I've mentioned eloping to my own son several times as a good solution to wedding folderol. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676296 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 10:39:15 +0000 Style Fan 1676296@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I try to not make assumptions.&nbsp; Similar to Ms Mary and her LF.&nbsp; My stepson #1 recently got married and agonized over his guest list.&nbsp; Stepson #2 is getting married this summer.&nbsp; More agony.&nbsp; I remember getting married and the guest list.&nbsp; The people you have to invite.&nbsp; They are on the first round.&nbsp; <br />Who cares what round you are on?&nbsp; <br />She is a good neighbour.&nbsp; She probably wants you there and is happy she can invite you.</p> <p>My brother and 2 sisters eloped.&nbsp; Smart.&nbsp; No guest list. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676229 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 04:31:13 +0000 Anonymous 1676229@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'd go. It could be that you are more friends with the mom of bride, and not the bride herself? If that's the case, mom may not have had as much sway on guest list. That's just one possible interpretation, but it ultimately doesn't matter. Keeping your good neighbor friend should be your objective here. Just maybe don't stay long in the heat. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676180 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 02:18:36 +0000 JAileen 1676180@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Angie, Suz, thank you. </p> <p>Mary, yoo hoo, we need your rules, please. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676164 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 01:50:19 +0000 Suz 1676164@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Glad you are sorted, and going and now let's get to work on your outfit.&nbsp;</p> <p>And I also want to hear the rest of Mary's rules.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676114 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 00:51:27 +0000 Angie 1676114@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>EXCELLENT, JAileen. Now we can cheer you on in your outfit.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676065 Thu, 09 Jun 2016 00:25:04 +0000 rachylou 1676065@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Um, that's soooo much nicer, Mary, than my 'Never assume maliciousness for what stupidity can explain' Lol. You're good people. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wwyd-wedding-invitation-for-a-second-string-friend#post-1676040 Wed, 08 Jun 2016 23:56:39 +0000 JAileen 1676040@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Mary, thanks. What are your other rules? </p>