https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Thu, 28 May 2026 13:40:11 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784880 Tue, 07 Mar 2017 13:51:22 +0000 Thirkellgirl 1784880@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My dad used to always answer "fine" when asked how my mom or I looked, and the only time he said "very nice indeed" was on my wedding day. When my husband and I married I told him that if he was going to say "fine" he needed to assign a number to it and he now says "you look fine with a nine!" if he doesn't come up with a more creative assessment. Husbands are trainable...</p> <p>I don't wear heels, either, but I wouldn't have worn flip flops, and I would have worn more makeup and simpler (not necessarily smaller) jewelry, but you look&nbsp;PERFECTLY lovely to me. I think you're being too hard on yourself. </p> <p>If you look at my photos I'm not exactly red-carpet-worthy myself. I've both&nbsp;raised and lowered my standards and expectations for how I want to look a LOT in the past couple years. Raised in that I no longer buy things that I don't like a lot, and which are comfortable and an appropriate level of dressiness for the situation (keep: LL Bean cargo jacket/lose: Target blazer; keep: JJill dress/lose: NY&amp;Co fussier dresses). And lowered my expectations in that I've made a concerted effort to stop comparing every glance in the mirror to how I looked twenty years ago. I work with many volunteers about my age and recently attended a funeral with many college friends and believe it or not I look pretty good (tended, stylish) compared to these women. It's been quite a process to deal with the hair/weight/droops of current me and to learn to like this body and face, instead of missing the old one. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784833 Tue, 07 Mar 2017 11:16:11 +0000 Summer 1784833@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think the dress is lovely on you.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784776 Tue, 07 Mar 2017 02:58:02 +0000 JillG 1784776@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Could you possibly shorten the ruffle of the dress a bit?&nbsp; Even an inch or so might give you a proportion that works better with a lower heel.&nbsp; It's such a flattering dress. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784596 Mon, 06 Mar 2017 17:16:42 +0000 jill58 1784596@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ryce, your husband's comment made me laugh. I've had many similar moments.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784588 Mon, 06 Mar 2017 16:18:55 +0000 Anonymous 1784588@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Husbands - ha!</p> <p>Mine rarely comments, but a few weeks ago he gave me a rare compliment.</p> <p>I was wearing a silk blouse that fit beautifully, in a subtle print that includes all of my most flattering colors. &nbsp;Great shoes that picked up one of the colors in the print and a clutch that picked up another of the colors. &nbsp;Oh, and a bracelet he had given me. &nbsp;I was feeling really good about the outfit.</p> <p>As we are walking out the door, my husband says "I like those pants." &nbsp;</p> <p>"Those pants" were a pair of jeans that I probably wear twice a week. &nbsp;</p> <p>WHAT??</p> <p>Anyway, your dress is lovely, Jenni, and you've gotten some terrific ideas on different ways to style it. &nbsp;Can't wait to see how you wear it the next time!</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784411 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 23:23:08 +0000 Brooklyn 1784411@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jenni, the dress is lovely on you. I agree with Angie that different shoes and bag (I'd like to see a clutch) would amp up the look. Have you thought about metallic sandals with a low heel?<br /> Also, what I do on these type of occasions is use my husband as a packhorse. I pack a little backpack with my dressy shoes in them and wear my comfy shoes for walking. Then change at or just before the venue. My DH carries the backpack and does not mind at all. Sometimes I pack a cardi or wrap and umbrella (if needed) too. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784398 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 22:45:12 +0000 Sal 1784398@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lucky you going to Waiheke - it is a beautiful spot - just so gorgeous.</p> <p>I cannot add much more that what all the others have said, I think you have had sage advice. &nbsp;I also think you look lovely.</p> <p>It is hard when you want to wear lovely shoes, but there is walking involved. &nbsp;I gave myself blisters this weekend walking out to dinner from my home in heels...but I wanted to wear them!! &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784361 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 19:38:33 +0000 Rambling Ann 1784361@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Belated happy birthday.</p> <p>Waiheke sounds very posh.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784350 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 19:11:24 +0000 Jenni NZ 1784350@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Well I have learned so much here! It's the next morning now and I am lucky to start work a bit later today. I do love boho and have even called myself a "boho girl" in the past, I've also often felt that elegance or glamour, and me, do not go together. ( Probably why I felt so awesome in my ball dress which you've seen, as for once I did feel those things.)<br /> Both the turquoise bags are quite old, and the jacket is from 2010. The jacket is a little tight on the sleeves and I had been wondering about culling it. I like its colour.<br /> Thanks Suz for the comment about the photo. All photos taken by DH of 5 foot 2 me look down on me, because he is 6 foot 4. We looked very funny having the first dance at our wedding, in the photos!<br /> I think one issue is also that I don't know where I'm going with my style or where to take it. After this whole episode I've been putting some black sandals in my Wishlist on Styletread as if those would have "fixed" my problems with this outfit. Grateful for your comment Angie, and all of you who like the dress. It does have a black lining/slip underneath which doesn't go down as far, which is how it is floaty and transparent at the bottom. I think I still love the colours of the dress and may try it again for another occasion. The only compliments I received at the event itself were about the Swarowski earrings and necklace.<br /> Maybe I just need to post lots more outfits on YLF as this feedback has been so helpful, about 100 times more helpful than my lovely husband's who gave the "fine" response when I said I was feeling a bit sad. However he also said that he told the birthday girl he liked her dress as he felt obliged to, as he knew she had spent a lot of time sorting her outfit and she is his favourite most valued colleague. But he said to me, " What else could I say... But well, it was blue". So that's his takeaway from all her effort... she had a blue dress.<br /> Thanks to you all, I feel better x </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784308 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 16:22:21 +0000 Angie 1784308@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>The dress is fabulous. Very flattering shape. FESTIVE. Great look on you.</p> <p>If I were dressing you, I'd have changed the shoes, bag, and jacket to styles that are more current. That way you'd have given the old dress new life.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784300 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 14:56:06 +0000 Carla 1784300@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Reading your intro I wasn't expecting such a nice outfit! The darkly romantic dress is perfect for the brief you described and I bet it was so pretty in movement and with a breeze. Probably physically comfortable as well (since you didn't need to wear the jacket).</p> <p>You did accessories it in a boho kind of way, and (IMHO) boho skews casual. Sleeker accessories (like others have said) maybe a clutch or chain handle purse, and refined footwear would have communicated a more formal vibe.</p> <p>Be that as it may, you look lovely and comfortable, and entirely appropriate for the occaision . </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784294 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 14:29:20 +0000 Anonymous 1784294@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I do think this dress is flattering on you, but agree with the other comments that accessories can help make items more modern. I can't count how many times DH has said I look fine. My response is usually "so you don't like it?" That's why we have YLF to come to. :)</p> <p>I think you should consider what outfits you have that would have made you feel better, or shop with a vision of that in mind. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784287 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 14:09:30 +0000 Suz 1784287@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jenni, you look lovely in the dress! For me, the length is good, even with the flat jandals (fun new word for me!) for two reasons -- first, it is very floaty and almost transparent at the bottom, and secondly, I actually think the proportions are a bit "off" <i><b>in the photo</b></i> vs on your body -- because of the perspective, we are looking down so your bottom half looks shorter than it looks/ looked in real life for anyone seeing you in motion.&nbsp;</p> <p>I tend to think that 3 things might be going on:</p> <ul> <li>You might have felt that you preferred the outfits of a few other people.</li> <li>You might have preferred those outfits because they felt closer to your <i><b>aspirational</b></i> style -- i.e. where you want to go in your style. (This is connected with Caro's "over it" comment.)</li> <li>Your DH's comment might have been a bit deflating, however well intended and lovingly meant!&nbsp;</li> </ul> If I were in your jandals I would keep this lovely dress for a while and try it with plain red accessories. With your grey hair, the red will be a slam dunk and it will "clarify" the look somehow, I think. The great thing about party dresses is that it takes them a long time to date <i>if you use very modern accessories.&nbsp;</i> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784281 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 13:55:34 +0000 Anonymous 1784281@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think you look wonderful. The length of the dress looks good to me because the fabric is floaty. It is also a great shape on you. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784208 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 04:06:28 +0000 Jenni NZ 1784208@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks Shevia. He did manage to miss the cue. I know he didn't mean to...<br /> I do love all my outfit components individually. If I wear that dress again I might pick out the red, as I do have red sandals, red handbag, red earrings, even nice red sunhat I bought vintage for a wedding 2 y ago. I no longer have any plain black sandals. I can find them boring and my last pairs died and got given away in the charity "clothing bin" . But maybe they do let dresses shine, hmmm. Food for thought. Lots of lovely support thank you, it's like a group hug! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784194 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 03:29:28 +0000 Jaime 1784194@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jenni I really do think you are being too hard on yourself. Your picture does not match you description at all. You look great in the dress and I bet the hat was smashing. I think your husband was just trying to comfort you and missing the cue to actually say how good you look. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784192 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 03:02:30 +0000 Caro in Oz 1784192@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><i>"...I guess I do tend to zero in on the ones who I think look nicer than me, sigh." &nbsp;</i>I&nbsp;don't think the zeroing in is the problem - I think it's a great skill to see &amp; learn from observing others. The problem comes when we are negative towards ourselves because of it. Instead I would focus my critical faculties towards improving my outfit. <br />You know you liked the silk dress &amp; plain shoes &amp; you also know you didn't like your bag in this context. As Angie says NEXT!!</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784191 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 02:32:32 +0000 Jenni NZ 1784191@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks all, great wisdom here. Thank you La Belle Demimondaine- yes, I probably did compare myself to the other guests and maybe particularly the birthday girl who is slimmer than me and 6 y younger almost to the day ( she is 1 March and I'm 2 March). She wore a beautiful sky blue silk dress , embellished above bust, to the knee, and some plain black sandals with a tiny wedge. I think I felt overdone and TMGO next to her maybe. I did put the bag down most of the time so wasn't feeling the bag was an issue even though embellished. She does do a lot of yoga and I don't do any! Some yoga friends were there too, all with very nice figures. When I think about it, there were some women there who were not as nicely dressed, I guess I do tend to zero in on the ones who I think look nicer than me, sigh. As has been said by wiser heads than me, comparison is the enemy of happiness . I wish I could stop doing that.<br /> I also do begin to wonder if I'm "over" the dress as you suggest is possible, Caro. I did buy it 8 years ago, after all. I do feel that on-the-knee dresses are better for my short height, did not know that until more fashion reading in more recent years. I am wanting to cull but I suppose I get scared of giving away a dress like that which has the bright colours I love and which I adored when I bought it. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784189 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 02:23:34 +0000 Bijou 1784189@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I love the dress on you and agree with the above comments that simpler accessories may have kept the focus on the killer dress. I like your jandals. Having sore feet is never a good look. Husbands can say the worst things when trying to cheer us up, no wonder you felt a bit disappointed! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784183 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 02:04:17 +0000 Bonnie 1784183@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You look perfectly dressed for a summer birthday party. I went to the symphony today and they played a wonderful new piece composed by a young woman - maybe 30s. She was there for the performance and even spoke about her inspiration. She was dressed very much like you are dressed down to the jandals.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784168 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 01:25:00 +0000 Caro in Oz 1784168@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think the shape of the dress looks great on you. The only thing I notice is that the proportions (longer length) may look &amp; feel better with a heel. I hear what you say about walking though.&nbsp;</p> <p>I'm not sure about the jacket - something about the fabric &amp; frill makes me feel it may not be right with the dress - a light wrap/shawl could be a great option. I'd also go with plainer shoes &amp; bag.</p> <p>One last thought, for me there comes a time when however much I've loved something &amp; however many compliments I've received when wearing it, I know I'm over it Not sure if this applies to you but it may be worth thinking about what your vision of the perfect outfit, for this occasion, would have been. Glad you had a great time :)&nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784167 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 01:19:18 +0000 Linda de Vasquez 1784167@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You look fabulous!!! The dress is fantastic as well as the jandles!!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784166 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 01:17:47 +0000 RobinF 1784166@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I like it! I agree it might look better with different shoes but think the dress is very floaty and festive. Can't wait for warm weather here! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784161 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 01:05:59 +0000 lpr200 1784161@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You look lovely and nice I'd like to see you in the first top. Do you think you may have liked it if you "anchored" the dress with darker slippers and necklace? It's beautiful as is, but I wonder if that would decrease the feeling of "too much going on", and maybe a lightweight chiffon scarf rather than jacket?<br /> The dress looks great on you but playing with the accessories might give it a different feel? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784153 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 23:24:15 +0000 JAileen 1784153@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I like your outfit, and you look very nice in it. The dress looks perfect for a warm day birthday party with a ferry ride. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784152 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 22:52:48 +0000 Mary Beth (formerly LBD) 1784152@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think you look beautiful and festive! &nbsp; This is the perfect outfit for a summer birthday party that involves a boat ride. &nbsp; You're colorful and lovely, and the dress suits you well. &nbsp; The proportions look great.</p> <p>I think you should take a moment and let that sink in. &nbsp; And then let's analyze...</p> <p>What happened to make you second-guess yourself? &nbsp;&nbsp;Were you happy with your outfit when you walked out the door? &nbsp; I'm wondering if perhaps you were comparing yourself unfairly and unfavorably to the other party guests?</p> <p>I keep studying the photos. &nbsp; The&nbsp;only thing I see is that maybe the bag adds a level of visual movement and busyness that you might have found uncomfortable when you got to the party. &nbsp; I don't think that it was "too much going on", though, for a bright sunny day with boats and water and celebrating &nbsp;:) &nbsp;:) &nbsp;:)</p> <p>By the way, your husband's response was what I think 9 out of 10 men would say. &nbsp;(Including my boyfriend. &nbsp; Boy, do I have to fish hard to get more than a 'you look fine' out of him) &nbsp; &nbsp; :D&nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784151 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 22:49:42 +0000 Jenni NZ 1784151@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks kkards, it is a uniquely NZ word, short for "Japanese sandals". Some NZer believes they invented them way back, given the idea from the Japanese. Of course this is internationally disputed but we have always called them jandals here<br /> Thanks Jill, I couldn't have managed high heels due to the walking although I do think that length of dress would look better proportioned with a higher heel. I also think in retrospect that plainer accessories may have allowed the dress to shine more. I forgot to show the maximal sunhat, pink and stripey! I think I'm quite suspectible to picking out colours from a print and thinking that's what's needed. Appreciate your thoughts. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784150 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 22:31:20 +0000 jill58 1784150@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jenni, I think you look lovely in the dress. I wonder if your husband's comment was sort of deflating. &nbsp;If I ask my husband how I look and he responds, "You look fine," (which happens) It makes me feel like I look adequate, rather than great. I do like the dress but you suggested that perhaps there was too much going on. I wonder if you might have liked the outfit better with solid colored shoes and bag? I can understand the temptation to wear the sandals since the colors correspond so well but I might try a simpler style, maybe with a heel if you're comfortable with that. I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with your outfit and I love the gold nail polish but I think simplifying your sandals and bag might be something to try.&nbsp;</p> <p>Just wanted to add, looking in your finds I see lots of red shoes. I think a pair of red shoes or sandals might be great with this dress.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784149 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 22:26:08 +0000 kkards 1784149@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>i like this...it reads very summer party to me.... </p> <p>(&amp; thanks for teaching me a new word today...jandal, sounds so much more than flip flop or the other American name for them&nbsp;thongs)</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-to-the-winery-long-lunch#post-1784140 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 21:34:10 +0000 Jenni NZ 1784140@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi everyone. We went out yesterday for my husband's work colleague's 50th birthday lunch. It was held at a winery on Waiheke, an island a ferry ride away. Drinks first then 4 courses, went on for nearly 5 hours. I knew she wanted people to dress up and had put lots of effort into organising, for 26 people.<br /> I put a lot of effort into my outfit but I'm really disappointed with how it turned out, when I see the photo taken at the ferry terminal on the way back. There was some walking to the ferry involved so I had to wear comfy shoes, picked jewelled jandals ( flip-flops to most of you) and dressed them up with gold toenail polish which was also on my fingers. The dress is old, from 2009 I think. When I first wore it to an all-day training that year a woman said "I love your dress, I just can't stop looking at it." It has peacocks, flowers, bright colours ... I tried to tone in the shoes and the larger bag to carry stuff, with a smaller bag inside for comb and lipstick which I took to the restroom partway through. I had a pale green silky jacket with me which I didn't need as very hot and sunny, only put on briefly when sitting in the sun, to avoid sunburn. The jewellery is Swarovski bought half price at Waikiki Beach July last year, its first outing.<br /> Are the proportions wrong, or is there just Too Much Going On? Why am I disappointed? Husband says it looked fine and no-one's outfit was " What do you call it, red carpet worthy?"- but I don't think this helps! I could see that all the women, maybe 18 of the 26 guests, had put in effort on their outfits! His colleague is single and has a lot of female friends and some gay male friends, but also there were couples like us.<br /> #1-2 are the big and small bags, #3 the jacket I took, #4 shoes, #5 dress fabric close-up, #6 me in outfit.<br /> I believe the birthday girl had a great time, we did, met some lovely new people.<br /> Honest opinions appreciated! </p>