YouLookFab Forum » Topic: .

YouLookFab Forum » Topic: . https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Wed, 22 Apr 2026 20:29:41 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php Deborah on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1091339 Wed, 20 Nov 2013 03:46:45 +0000 Deborah 1091339@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Carter, I really like this outfit.  It is sleek and elgant, very classy.  I find the whole numbers thing interesting:)  I have not counted and would consider my wardrobe medium sized.  But the truth is, based on need I could probably half it and still have plenty to wear. carter on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1091227 Wed, 20 Nov 2013 01:59:10 +0000 carter 1091227@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ And they had tiny waists, karymk! You look great. You seem to be weathering 50 just fine! karymk on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1091181 Wed, 20 Nov 2013 01:36:31 +0000 karymk 1091181@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Sista, I am right behind you, 50 in May.  My reliable body is starting to betray me somewhat too, I have put on lbs this year and stuff feels tight despite simple eating, bar method regularly, with walking in addition.  I look fine, but it's distressing to not fit into your favorite things. I am glad you got it under wraps.  I have never heard of Primal Fitness, but I'm sure its a good compliment to all the Paleo diets out there!  It's sort of ironic: eat and workout like a cavewoman-- Just don't dress like one!  Oh that's a bad visual... Although I must say, Wilma Flintstone and Betty Rubble were pretty chic in their minimal chic, off-the-shoulder minidresses. Emily on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090868 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 22:12:32 +0000 Emily 1090868@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Hey Carter, you look great - I can see why those pants are favourites, and the sweater is a great fit.    I like that your simple outfit is a backdrop for maximal jewellery.  But I know how frustrating it is when you walk out the door in something you know isn't quite right.  Suz on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090479 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 17:58:19 +0000 Suz 1090479@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Love your thought process here, Carter. (And congratulations on the fitness gains, by the way. That is impressive. I came to YLF after substantial weight loss/ fitness changes myself, so I get it.)  From the sounds of things, you will need a fairly large wardrobe. Being in the public eye and working with clients multiple times, as well as having lots of different kinds of activities, will ensure that you need different items and different types of item.  I found myself nodding along with all the other comments -- such great suggestions here! I really like Parsley's suggestions, and E's -- and it sounds as if you're already clear about why you're reaching for some things but not others, and why you didn't feel right in yesterday's outfit.  Thistle on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090415 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 17:13:19 +0000 Thistle 1090415@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You look terrific!  It took some time, but you do look fabulous. I would try the one in and one out approach. I would also pre-make outfits so you have something fast when you are in a hurry. Also, start writing down what it is you love about a piece and why you reach for. This will help you make better decisions in the future. Refugee on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090407 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 17:10:27 +0000 Refugee 1090407@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ From your last response, " I really wanted something more authoritative", it sounds to me like you were looking for a suit.  That always says authority in my book.  And being down 1 in both skirt and pants, a suit could fill one (or both) of those holes and the more authoritative hole as well.  As an added thought, don't hang the suit together in the closet.  Seeing the items separately in their garment categories can keep one from always seeing it as a suit and therefore opening up more outfit options. Golden on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090173 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 14:24:51 +0000 Golden 1090173@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Great outfit, simple and sophisticated, love it! Glory on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090141 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 13:29:07 +0000 Glory 1090141@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You look wonderful and the pants are a perfect fit. I think the ladies have some great suggestions. I would add that starting with the area that is the most difficult for you is perhaps the best. The first category seems to require the greatest number of no repeat outfits so a formula and some great items to select from are a must. carter on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090125 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 13:10:32 +0000 carter 1090125@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Beth Ann, thanks for chiming in! You're right, this is formula dressing for me in my work outfits. I'm so glad you brought this up. I think I need to figure out another formula or two that work for me in this category, so I have options to change up the silhouette. That may make it much easier to evaluate the current items in my wardrobe for what's working and what's not. Thanks PMC, Neel, Alexandra. I do love these pants Neel. If you've seen any other of my WIWs, Beth Ann is right, it's formula dressing for me. It was not the look and feel I wanted yesterday though because I was interviewing agents (older, more years in real estate and male), so I really wanted something more authoritative. Now that I type this, I think that's a wardrobe hole. Jenanded, thanks. It was the health numbers (blood pressure for me, cholesterol and blood sugar for my husband) that I most wanted to correct. I figured my hormone-related shape changes were something that had to be accepted. My husband's doctor recommended the Mediterranean Diet for his issues, but that's exactly how we've been eating for years, so it was not working for us. I read several books, but the one that really resonated with me was Gary Taube's, "Why We Get Fat". It spoke to the science side of me. The leaning out and reshaping was a bonus for both of us. I also changed from long cardio sessions to the Primal Fitness workout. Really love it. jenanded on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090041 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 07:38:37 +0000 jenanded 1090041@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Would love to hear about your new healthy regime! 10 inches is amazing but more importantly that you feel/are better... do think the changing physique is adding to your woes but love Suz's analysis.... that hanger turned around trick can really help you to realise what you DON'T grab... Alexandra on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090025 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 06:38:44 +0000 Alexandra 1090025@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You look wonderful! I'm sorry to hear it was frustrating to get dressed but there's absolutely no way to tell from the way you look. Congratulations on the healthy lifestyle changes! Neel on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090011 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 06:11:33 +0000 Neel 1090011@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Wow!  You have a very inspirational story there Carter.  10 inches is a huge achievement!!  As a person who struggles with fluctuating weight I can totally understand the efforts that might have gone into it.  You deserve yourself a huge pat on the back for just that! As about your outfit, you look lovely!!  Love the beautiful shade of purple of the pant.  Sometimes outfits that look like a no brainer take a lot more time than one would think!  As about the wardrobe inventory, I really wish I could help you with that!  I am struggling with my own!  I am doing a lot of purging as I see my style evolve.  I will probably post something about it soon, once I figure out what! Anonymous on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1090003 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 05:55:28 +0000 Anonymous 1090003@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ congrats on making such positive changes in your health. the pants are great both in fit and color! Beth Ann on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089981 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 05:10:59 +0000 Beth Ann 1089981@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ So glad I was late to this thread (and late to bed, for that matter).  Your explanation gives me great perspective on your style goals.  Having just turned 50 this summer myself, I know how milestone birthdays can be used to facilitate big changes! Kudos to you on making lifestyle changes that have made you healther!  I seem to be taking the s-l-o-w road to better health myself, so it's encouraging to see my peers doing well!  How natural to have a style shift when your body has changed.  Even when you like the changes, it can make you feel "out of sync."  I think your outfit today is a great example of a successful "outfit formula."  The streamlined silhouette of slim trouser, v-neck sweater, pointy-toed flats and statement necklace is a winner for you.  Formulas are perfect for days when you're having closet frustrations.  They give you a day to wear what you know works while your figuring out other options. carter on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089944 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 04:19:06 +0000 carter 1089944@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Oh wow.  So many good things to think about!  First, thank you all so much for the votes of confidence and for the thoughtful insight.  So many of the things you've mentioned have started to set off light bulbs. Some background. I'll be 50 in a couple weeks, and over the summer that really started to bother me.  For the first time in my life, I had gained significant weight in my waist plus added a layer of insulation everywhere that hadn't been there before.  I felt frumpy and old in everything I tried to squeeze into.  My shape had completely changed, and nothing in my old wardrobe really suited this new shape.  So late July/early August I decided to makeover my wardrobe and style as my 50th birthday present to myself.  I ditched tons of stuff...it was way more like 20 items out to one item in.  The things that were coming in were things that I felt better in...longer tops to wear out to cover the tummy, pants with a slightly higher rise, etc.  So through the end of September, things were looking better, albeit fairly shapeless to camouflage the new shape. Around then, my husband and I both had our annual physicals.  Despite eating "right" and getting plenty of aerobic exercise, my blood pressure was up, and his blood sugar and cholesterol were up.  After significant research, I did a complete about-face on our old way of healthy eating and exercising.  Since October 2nd I've lost 10 inches, I have a waist again and my old pear-leaning shape has slimmed.  Blood pressure is also fine.  So now, the higher waisted bottoms and longer covering tops are not what I want to wear.  Don't get me wrong, I don't do tight/hoochee anything, but with the body shape change, I do want to acknowledge that I have a waist again, and I want to wear slimmer pants now that my pear half has gotten leaner.  About 10 days ago on YLF was the first time I have ever worn skinny jeans (or boots over my jeans, for that matter), and I liked it.  Who knew? All is not lost, I just need to figure out how to reconfigure things.  I have pants that I like but that aren't form fitting, so I need body con tops for those.  I have slim pants that I love, and the looser tops will work for those.  Although, I have to say that most of these are sweaters, and even though hot flashes were short lived about a year ago, I now just seem to run hot all the time. Parsley, Caro, E...you guys really hit on this.  Fit is elusive at the moment, and I need to figure this out. Suz, your approach to wardrobe building is a much more clearly designed version of what I have been trying to do, although probably without enough up-front homework.  My categories are: Client meetings/showings.  I'm in real estate, so showings can and most often do happen 7 days/week.  I guess I'd call this a business casual look.  I need to look finished and polished.  This is my largest category because I want significantly fewer repeats here than I want in other categories.  If it takes 4 months to sell a listing, I could conceivably see the same client 80-100 times in that 4 month period.  Maintaining a larger rotation lessens the likelihood that the client will see the same outfit 20 times in a relatively short period of time. Closings/open houses, agent caravans, listing appts.  These tend to be dresses or skirts for me. Work at home/errands/school volunteer.  This is nice casual, but nice enough that if I run onto a client at the grocery store, I don't have to duck around the corner.  Mainly jeans/cords and nice tops. Morning carpool/evening lounge.  After Gaylene gave me a much needed talking to a few weeks ago, my old stuff was tossed and replaced with my previous work at home/errands wardrobe that needed to be upgraded.  Gear.  This category has also been upgraded, even though I work out at home. Date night/social: I should have enough to pull from both home and client work wear.  Cocktail dresses and holiday wear are separate. Vacation. shorts, casual dresses, tee shirts Well, I've written an epistle, and I've barely touched on the great points you have all made.  I'm printing this now and will study it while standing in my closet tomorrow and evaluating what's working and why and what's not working and why not.  I'll report back! Jewell on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089816 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 02:08:44 +0000 Jewell 1089816@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You look fab! Only you (and those of us who saw your post) know how much effort went into looking this effortlessly chic! Regarding your closet confusion: you're already approaching your challenges in a thoughtful way. I think the next step is evaluating why certain wardrobe items aren't getting any love. When you've figured it out, then you can use that knowledge to purge or replace certain pieces. It's taken me two years to realize why I gravitate toward some items (comfort, style feels more "me" etc) and completely ignore others (ill-fitting, too much fuss and so on). Good luck! E on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089762 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 01:19:52 +0000 E 1089762@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You look wonderful in the outfit you finally decided on, but I understand the frustration! I'd suggest comparing the items you reach for all the time in a category vs the ones that try on and take right back off to figure out the differences and make your future shopping more effective. For example, trousers and jeans are most comfortable on me when they hit just below my belly button, which requires at least a 10" rise. I still have a few pairs of mid rise on me (8"-9") options, but I don't wear them quite as frequently. So I know in the future to be really picky about rises, since it affects my use level so much, and I'd love to find higher rise replacements for the mid rise trousers I have left (following the one in/one out principal). I also like my trousers slim with tapering at the ankle: non tapered/skinny ones don't get worn as much. Other things I've learned over the past couple of years (in case you identify with any of this): I much prefer rounded necklines to v neck ones, and I wear my tops with higher necklines the most. I won't wear straight or even a line skirts; I pick my full ones every time. I wear my dresses lined in acetate or with no linings more than the ones with polyster (I just figured out a work around with this though and now use a silk cami to keep the polyster from touching me). Right now I'm trying to figure out why I don't wear some of my long sleeve button down shirts more...I'm pretty sure it has something to with collar size/shape (I have a short neck), button placement, and seams (and maybe the sleeve proportions around the armpit), but I haven't quite put my finger on it yet. So no more of that type of shirt for me until I do!  Parsley on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089728 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 01:01:39 +0000 Parsley 1089728@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Carter, no one would ever know that you struggled today from the way you look: beautifully put together, well groomed, and accessorized! But I can relate to having a closet full of clothes and yet they're not always something I really want to wear. Suz's analysis is excellent (as always!), but I would recommend that you ask yourself the reason that you don't reach for the less favored clothes. Is the fit off? Are they uncomfortable? Poor quality? Color not flattering? Do they not express the fashion persona that you want to show to the world? If you can identify the reason you reject some of your items, as well as the reason you like the ones you end up choosing to wear, you'll be able to make better informed shopping decisions. I've found that for me fit issues are one of the key reasons I don't wear some of my things, and the next reason is that I don't feel like a piece expresses what I'm trying to express about my style. I've also found that lower quality items hardly ever manage to feel quite right, while something with beautiful fabric that's nicely cut always gives me pleasure. That seems obvious, but sometimes I've tried to tell myself that lesser quality things were "good enough", but in reality if I don't enjoy them they end up being a waste of money. Do any of these resonate with you? Anonymous on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089694 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 00:44:53 +0000 Anonymous 1089694@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You look great, Carter! Caro in Oz on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089689 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 00:43:01 +0000 Caro in Oz 1089689@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz has explained it so well. I used to always have a niggling feeling I had too much but then I wouldn't have enough, especially tops for travel. Working out what I ACTUALLY wore on a daily basis was the key for me. Number wise I had enough shirts in my wardrobe so my clothing count & ratio was about right but it wasn't until I realised I didn't like wearing shirts under my jackets that I knew why I felt like I didn't have enough :)  Angie on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089687 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 00:42:54 +0000 Angie 1089687@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Great outfit. Great bling bookending.  Have you tried the one-in-one-out approach? That will keep your wardrobe the same size without feeling overwhelming.  karymk on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089686 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 00:41:59 +0000 karymk 1089686@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I love this combo. Why was it such a struggle because it looks so simple and perfect! It is soooo refreshing to see some jewelry being worked! Love it, Carter. Peri on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089675 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 00:35:59 +0000 Peri 1089675@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Carter, you look gorgeous! I like the colors and it looks so rich and elegant and simple all at once. So...if you aren't feeling it, maybe you are just tired of the items? They feel tired to you, but to us seeing them for the first time they look great. Nothing wrong with one in, one out if you are tired of the things going out. I don't like this phrase when it seems like you are required to get rid of something before you can get something new, even if you don't want to. Anyway, I'm kind of in the same place, so sending you some commiseration. And you asked about my polka splot cardigan...Loft last spring, sorry! Probably not available anymore. Suz on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089655 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 00:24:19 +0000 Suz 1089655@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You look beautiful. Sophisticated yet comfortable and chic.  So. Here are my thoughts, for what they are worth. I am in a similar place in my wardrobe -- it's pretty much the right size (I think) but in some areas is rather rich, whereas in other areas it seems to be poor.  I am taking careful note this year (and yes, it takes a whole year, going through each season) of what I actually reach for. What types of items in what season, for what circumstances?  I divided my life up into several overlapping yet distinct capsules. Yours will be different, but here are mine:  MOTG: I have a teen daughter and I still escort her round to various activities. We live in a small, casual city.  Work-at-home: I'm a writer and editor and work from home both in my paid capacity and for my creative work.  Workout and outdoor sports: self explanatory Sleepwear: ditto Appearances/ Events: As a writer I am sometimes invited to read, speak, or teach a class. I need various kinds of clothes for these activities. Some fairly casual but trendy/ current/ arty and some dressier. These can overlap with a date-night or night-out-with friends capsule.  City visits/ travel: I regularly travel to larger metropolitan centres where I want to "up the ante" in terms of my clothing. I also travel once per month to visit my mother in another city, for caregiving, taking her out, etc.  Having identified these various capsule, I then started to narrow down what I actually reach for in each situation. And in each season. And guess what? It's quite different.  In summer, I like woven tops for work-at-home.  In winter, I like knits.  Wow, what a big realization that was. No wonder all those button up shirts sit unworn in my closet all winter!! And meanwhile, I keep thinking I have "nothing to wear."  I guess what I am trying to say is that simply counting things up in an abstract way didn't get me far enough. I had to go further and think about what's actually super comfortable and what gives me high happiness factor in each situation. If my situation changes (i.e. I get an office job) my choices would also, obviously, change.  carter on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089642 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 00:12:39 +0000 carter 1089642@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Thanks, El Cee! I was in a bit of a funk all day. Should have made the time to post sooner. The comments and advice here always seem to help with an attitude adjustment on my part:-) El Cee on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089621 Tue, 19 Nov 2013 00:03:18 +0000 El Cee 1089621@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You look lovely and very "meeting appropriate". (Sorry your morning was so frustrating.) The necklace is beautiful and looks great bookended with the stack of bangles. carter on "." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wiw-11-18-and-closet-confusion#post-1089429 Mon, 18 Nov 2013 21:09:51 +0000 carter 1089429@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ .