https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Wed, 10 Jun 2026 06:09:59 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66427 Wed, 20 May 2009 07:28:20 +0000 HannahC 66427@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Cciele - I love the sandals you posted! My usual problem with the width of Naot is actually the footbed - in their more classic lines, the footbed is contoured (like in Birkenstoks), but it is too narrow for me, so the edges of the footbed dig into my foot. But, this newer line doesn't seem to have such a contoured footbed ... Must go check them out. The backstrap is a must, because otherwise they will fall from my feet on the playground.</p> <p>Angie - yes, I will start with Naot, since it is our local brand. I have a pair of Birkenstocks, from before-YLF, and while they are not hideous (this is a Madrid line, they have quite a delicate strap in front), they are very worn already, and also they don't have the backstrap. Anyway, I think Naot are a bit cheaper here.<br /> And you confirmed my suspicions about taking the casual up a notch. So I guess I won't be able to get away with a fitted tee and a pair of walking shorts anymore ... I do need structure, and this is exactly what bothered me in dressing casually - the lack of structure, and as a result, highlighting every lump and bump and making me look frumpy.</p> <p>Now I recognize another underrepresented retail niche - structured casual clothing for women above 35, who are moms of young children Especially now, when the average age of having kids is so much more advanced than in the previous generation (example: my mom was 26 when she had me, and this was considered almost too old; I had my oldest daughter when I was 26 as well, and I was the youngest mom in the daycare and on the playground ). </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66408 Wed, 20 May 2009 02:55:09 +0000 Angie 66408@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I like the thinking on this thread and I think I’ve answered all the quezzies - but let me know if I haven’t. A few people hit the nail on the head: change your current dressing habit and lots of practice. It all becomes A LOT easier after a few tried and tested seasons. Promise!</p> <p>So, HannahC, you have ample feedback to get the search going. I eagerly await your progress. And on that note, have you considered stylish Birkentsocks, Naots, Eccos or Merrels? </p> <p>Unfortunately ladies, the older and softer our bodies get, the more structure we need to look our best. There is no getting away from it. That’s one of my mantras: you need to dress a little smarter as you get older. It’s totally age appropriate. You can still be casual, just WITH style, and that might mean a new type of casual then what you're used to. The goal is to look "youthful" as opposed to "young". Hope that makes sense. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66353 Tue, 19 May 2009 22:19:50 +0000 JewelryGirl 66353@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think the casual part is pretty easy for me, at least once I got my wardrobe in check anyway. I had to really focus on what I needed for my lifestyle. I remember feeling like I had an entire closet full of orphans not very long ago actually. It's amazing what all of the wonderful advice on this site, a little perspective and some focused shopping can do for you. I wear pants or shorts (bremuda's most of the time), &lt;cringe cringe&gt; regular shorts on a hot hot day. Then, add simple knit tops (I prefer a rayon blend). Then, my favorite part is fun accessories &#38; shoes!!! They can make or break an outfit for me! I typically am wearing a small heel to work right now &#38; flats for errands during the day. My kids are older to so I don't have to worry about scrunching on my top from holding little one's anymore or spit up. When I did, I used to wear cotton knit &#38; ironically preferred patterns as they didn't seem to show a stain as much. I think I'm leaning more towards solids now from one of Angie's previous blogs as I look back on my wardrobe &#38; think that I likely tire of prints easier as well unless it's a pattern/color I absolutely LOVE (scrolls, paisley, something like that). I also find that I have a tendency to shrink something a bit too much in the dryer sometimes so I have to take that into consideration in my shopping. Gosh, I'm probably digressing now. Anyway, I don't think casual is hard. Dressing up more is probably harder for me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66350 Tue, 19 May 2009 22:15:24 +0000 cciele 66350@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think the the leggings and tunic look will suit you, Hannah!</p> <p>I was also thinking of Naot sandals for you. I think the Allegro line is supposed to run a little wider; maybe something with a backstrap like this one:<br /> <a href="http://www.naot.com/cgi-bin/show_product.pl?yaleet_number=35012&#038;cat=WMnSandals" rel="nofollow">http://www.naot.com/cgi-bin/sh.....WMnSandals</a></p> <p>I also find Mephistos to be comfortable, but perhaps they would be too narrow for you. Do sandals with adjustable top straps work for you? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66320 Tue, 19 May 2009 20:27:03 +0000 HannahC 66320@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Patience, I love your gladiators! Unfortunately, I have very very fussy feet, so I predict they won't be happy in these sandals </p> <p>My usual trouble with Naot is that they are too narrow for me: unlike Birkenstok, they don't offer regular and wide widths, just one width, which tends to be too narrow. Otherwise, I would definitely purchase a pair, especially since it is our local company (it is still very expensive, but the selection is great, and we have many Naot stores around). However, I think they have several types of dressier flat sandals this year, so I might be in luck. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66317 Tue, 19 May 2009 20:06:35 +0000 Patience 66317@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hannah, these are the gladiators I have which I got last year. They are very comfortable to me. I'd buy another pair if they had my size.</p> <p><a href="http://www.zappos.com/product/7432900/color/632" rel="nofollow">http://www.zappos.com/product/7432900/color/632</a></p> <p>I would also recommend Born and Naot sandals that have been linked to on other threads as prettier than gear but still feeling comfortable-- I've worn both. There are actually lots of comfort brands that probably have Angie Approved styles. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66312 Tue, 19 May 2009 19:50:27 +0000 HannahC 66312@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Shiny, I think you have a wrong image of Israeli playgrounds We don't have wood chips - I am guessing the reason is that we don't have enough wood to waste it on playground cover, but I might be wrong. Instead, we have some kind of a black rubbery surface (softer to fall at than on concrete). I remember Boston playgrounds - wood chips and grass all around, and trees giving shade. Here, there is no grass - grass needs to be planted and watered, and because of the scarcity of water nobody waters the grass. So, there is this rubbery surface and no shade except from the neighboring buildings. About safety in sandals - hmmm ... I never thought about it, to be honest. The kids are wearing sandals, and they are engaged in a far more intensive physical activity, so I guess it is ok?</p> <p>Shiny, I don't wash anything by hand - even my bras (which I put in a laundry bag and wash on the delicate cycle). My hands are over-sensitive to detergents and water, so if I wash something by hand, I get bleeding cracks in my palms. Not pretty. About wearing gear - this is exactly the problem: on one hand, the type of activity calls for gear; on the other hand, this is still an outing in the city, and we walk around, and go for ice-cream sometimes (add ice-cream stains to the list of hazards for the casual outfit ), so I don't want to wear gear. I guess I am looking for something that is just as comfortable as gear, but doesn't look like gear. Did I say "impossible task" before?</p> <p>Patience - aha, so the Sweet Pea tops can be machine-washed! I might consider them then and compromise on drying (my initial requirement was that the clothes can be dried in the dryer, but I guess this might be too much for grown-up clothes). And yes, I will definitely stock up on summer tops when the end of the season sales start. This especially makes sense in a hot climate, because the sales start in July, and I can keep wearing the clothes until November. </p> <p>OK, so I will be looking for two kinds of outfits: (1) tunics/dresses with leggings (I am very skeptical, but I trust your judgment), and (2) interesting knits with clams. I guess I will leave harem pants for another time :)<br /> Any recommendations for non-gear-but-feeling-like-gear sandals? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66308 Tue, 19 May 2009 19:24:44 +0000 Patience 66308@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hannah, thanks! I agree that my outfit was for cooler days-- it was actually surprisingly cool that day. It gets just as hot here in Texas-- triple digits. For that weather, I would wear clams and an interesting sweet pea like top and gladiators. I have a pair of casual white gladiators that I feel comfortable in at the playground. Shiny is right about sandals on the playground-- my feet get awfully dusty. But I'm with you in that I'd rather my feet be dusty than hot.</p> <p>Sweet pea tops do hold up from washing. I wash my sweet pea tops on delicate and then lay them out to dry. It's as easy as pie for me. I have a separate laundry basket for myself that I put just my clothes in. Then once a week I put everything in it on delicate and skip the dryer. I am in complete control of the laundry machines in our house, though.</p> <p>I have also accepted what Shiny says-- summer tops don't usually last more than a season for me. There are casual woven machine washable tops out there-- that's often what I look for too. Stock up at the end of the season this year! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66306 Tue, 19 May 2009 19:09:23 +0000 shiny 66306@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hannah,personally I think if you are climbing on the playground then sandals - baring your toes - are probably a safety issue? Plus wouldn't you get all the wood chips stuck in your sandals? I think playgrounds might call for something more like gear. I do think it's okay to wear gear when a situation calls for gear! For example, if we are going on a long walk, with intention to work up a sweat (i.e., exercise, not just an urban stroll), then I will wear gear. If we are going boating, there's no way I'm wearing anything BUT gear. (Have you seen the Charles River lately? It's not very clean! DH fell in once, and wound up covered in slimy oily stuff.... )</p> <p>I handwash my sweetpeas - they can run, so you have to do them separately or with like colors. But the good news is they dry super fast. Yes, they make sleeveless versions. </p> <p>My best bet for machine-washable tops that have some interest - and often some structure - is ATL. I have great luck there for blouses that are made of woven cotton, so highly breathable. My only peeve is that they don't last all that long. You do have to replace them after two seasons or so (realistically -just as you would with Gap tees). But, that shop is cheap, esp at sale time. I will say that their basic cotton tees tend to last better than the Gap tees, and have more interesting details too. They have a bit of spandex in them, so I think that helps them keep their shape better. I also agree with whomever mentioned H&#38;M! </p> <p>Ultimately I am resigned to the idea that summer tops are something that needs to be replaced frequently. You simply sweat too much in them. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66302 Tue, 19 May 2009 18:56:29 +0000 HannahC 66302@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Patience, I love the description of your strawberry-picking outfit! Wow, I bet you were the most stylish person on the farm! I am looking for something much much lower maintenance: no white, and actually no jeans either because of the weather (way too hot for denim).</p> <p>Shana and Shiny - yes! as I grow older (and unfortunately heavier than I used to be), I must have some structure in my outfits (Christine, you mentioned structure too, so I know this is not only an age issue). Otherwise, I feel frumpy, clunky, dumpy, and the whole load of unflattering adjectives. Shiny, I did love living in Boston for dressing up and for the fact that there are not too many hot days there Alas, I was pregnant for 9 months out of 2 years we lived there, so this was a fashion challenge in itself. Playgrounds are quite a fashion challenge, aren't they? Shiny, in the terms of shoes, in winter I manage with my city sneakers and mary-jane keens. In the between weather, I have comfy ballet flats (not the apple green ones - I have a black pair from a while ago that looks like ballet dancing shoes and is very comfortable). But, it is way too hot now for closed shoes, so I don't know what to put on my feet. I don't want to resort to athletic sandals, but I guess a sandal that allows you to climb the playground equipment has to be gear? Or not? BTW, I don't have Cons exactly for the reasons Shiny mentioned - I feel awfully clunky and frumpy in them.</p> <p>Shiny, how well do the Sweet Pea tops hold up in frequent laundering? I saw quite a few on e-bay, and if they can be washed and brutally tossed in the dryer, I might be tempted ... Do they make sleeveless tops as well?</p> <p>I think this is a missed retail opportunity: YLF-approved "play clothes" for moms </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66275 Tue, 19 May 2009 17:14:42 +0000 shiny 66275@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I relate to most everything that has been said already. Except I don't know if anyone said this yet: I just feel totally frumpy in most casual wear, the "jean-gap tee-sneaker or other sturdy flat shoe" look. I don't mind the jeans so much anymore (once I found my citizens!), but it's the rest of the casual uniform I don't like. Yes I have Cons, but I still feel horribly clunky and frumpy in them whenever I wear them. :-(</p> <p>I also dread the summer months and my aging body needs structure and layers! I do not like to bare my shoulders in tank tops and spaghetti straps and most floaty breezy dresses look awful on me. </p> <p>I am so extreme on this, I doubt I'd ever move to a southern climate because then I'd feel under-dressed and frumpy most of the year. One of the reasons I like my urban area is because it gives me a perfect excuse to take it up a notch and go smart casual nearly all the time. I would much rather be a bit over-dressed, than feel frumpy. </p> <p>And don't get me started on the years when my kids were breastfeeding and frequenting playgrounds! Ugh. I cringe when I look at the old pictures. </p> <p>Last summer was the first summer I've ever felt "just right." Not every day with every outfit, but getting there. Thank goodness for denim clamdiggers, sweet pea tops, and Me-Too ballet flats!!! I just bought yet-another sweet pea top yesterday, in fact, thinking forward towards the summer.... yes I know I'm supposed to be on a shopping ban but the pattern and color - I couldn't resist. :-)</p> <p>Hannah - I've been thinking that you might really like the Me-Too Lacie's I have. They are so incredibly comfy (12-hour shoes! I can walk all over town in these, no problem!), and this style is a bit more sporty/less dressy. I would get them in the bronze so they don't show dirt. I am going to live in these all summer... </p> <p>Otherwise, I've been lately noticing Puma's on everyone's feet around here. Not with clams but with long jeans. I would like to give those a try, as an alternative to Cons. They look more streamlined to me? Anyone have Puma's? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard/page/2#post-66269 Tue, 19 May 2009 16:43:56 +0000 Vani 66269@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I find casual hard also, but for reasons a little different. It is mainly because when in the company of other friends doing fairly casual stuff e.g. when we go out for a beer at the Irish pub down the street etc., I have to deal with them feeling under dressed. I guess it just boils down to the fact that I put just a teensy bit more though into what I'm wearing, and maybe spend 2-3 mins extra getting dressed </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66257 Tue, 19 May 2009 16:10:09 +0000 Patience 66257@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've been following this thread too and I just want to add practice practice practice. While I would also love to have three days with Angie (and an unlimited supply of money), I've found that over time, this site and some practice are sufficient. </p> <p>I was looking at some pictures of myself when my daughter (my oldest) was a newborn and I was a bit embarrassed. My mom style also involved fitted tees and jeans or shorts. And I never groomed my eyebrows before the age of 29. Gasp! Anyway, my point is that it can be done even though it is a bit more work than buying a slew of tees in colors as Kari points out.</p> <p>I think casual is so hard because we are surrounded by "casual" that is defined by tees and sweats. I think what Angie is trying to say is that we have to redefine casual for ourselves as something that is more stylish and polished. And of course, still comfortable.</p> <p>Back in March, we went strawberry picking. I wore chucks, dark wash jeans, a loose white woven blouse (casual), white cami, my lime green canvas biker jacket and a fab mommy bag. I ended up leaving the bag in the car for the actual picking part because it was just more practical but I felt completely fab and comfortable. This farm is a very dusty place and my son got covered in strawberry juice and ice cream. Somehow, I managed to come out fairly clean, but even if I hadn't it would have been okay because everything was cleanable. </p> <p>Anyway, I definitely didn't get to this point overnight and I know I'll need to keep practicing as my body and lifestyle change with pregnancy and nursing. Hannah, I also think you did a great job with your yacht outfit and I definitely think you can find "play clothes" that are stylish for the park. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66231 Tue, 19 May 2009 13:58:52 +0000 crwilson 66231@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>As I've complained about in other threads, casual is getting more difficult. Part of my problem is that when I'm wearing casual clothing, I want to be perfectly comfortable, and I seem to be especially sensitive to any clothing that pinches or pulls or is in any way uncomfortable. This is especially problematic since I look best in quite structured clothes. Add to it that I also live in an uber-casual rural Midwestern town... I swear, I'm going to have to stay inside all summer so that I can wear my lounging clothes. I'm hoping to find a pair of walking shorts that I like and a few interesting knit tops and then I'll call it good for the summer. If I can manage one more day dress, I think I'll be okay. At least my feet aren't fussy, so I have no shoe problems. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66227 Tue, 19 May 2009 13:20:57 +0000 shana 66227@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Count me in as someone who has trouble with casual. For more formal events, no problem and back when I was working I felt like I knew what I was doing so much more than I do now. For me at least, part of the issue is that I am finding as I grow older (and saggier) that I need more structure in my clothing. But most casual clothing (especially tops) is knit which doesn't have alot of structure and shows ever lump &#38; bump!</p> <p>Oh, and I have the bad keens (mine are the Newport H2s) linked above -two pairs in fact. I wear them for biking and hiking in the summer when I am wearing gear and love them! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66193 Tue, 19 May 2009 08:26:32 +0000 HannahC 66193@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Angie, thanks for the birthday wishes! I actually like to receive belated birthday wishes because it helps to prolong the birthday feeling (yes, seriously!). Thanks for the compliments on my outfit, and I am so glad you liked the pearls!</p> <p>You know, I see harem pants and sandal booties everywhere in the stores right now. I won't be wearing them myself (I guess I am too conservative for that after all), but I like the look on younger trendier lasses.</p> <p>My next mission is to find flattering combinations of dresses/tunics and leggings. I was quite sure I cannot wear leggings at all, but maybe I can ...</p> <p>I also did not know that clamdiggers can be wide at the hem. I guess I was caught in the image of very skinny pants ending just below the knee. I like the idea of wider clamdiggers a lot, must to look for something like that in the stores (I love Boden, but unfortunately, the type of clams they carry is exactly the skinny one).</p> <p>I am also very much relieved that you approve of Cricket's keens, because I have a very similar kind myself (also flat maryjanes, but in dark red). Unfortunately, keens won't work for the kids-related activities in this heat (we had 104 degrees yesterday!). </p> <p>My sons have outfits for the day care that are sold as "play clothes" and come as a full outfit - a tee shirt and shorts (washable, good quality, comfortable knits). I guess what I am after is some kind of "play clothes" for grown-ups? And it would also be nice if they came as full outfits (or maybe as "garanimals", with different stickers indicating what can be worn with that) Of course, I am not seriously considering an outfit of a tee shirt and knit shorts, but, you know, a nice knit top and clamdiggers or walking shorts. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66089 Mon, 18 May 2009 22:51:34 +0000 Christie 66089@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm the one saying "phew," Angie! I'm glad those maryjanes can somewhat pass for a very casual event. I see the keen sandals everywhere too. I agree ... good for gear, but not stylish. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66086 Mon, 18 May 2009 22:35:42 +0000 Angie 66086@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>HannahC! I’m sorry we missed your birthday. Happy belated birthday! I’m glad you had a fab day sailing and you look adorable in that picture. Nice knitted top and bandana! And the pearls are a super touch :0)</p> <p>I’ll be back to answer more questions but for the mean time: </p> <p>o Hanna you can absolutely wear leggings and knit dresses. You can also sport a “wide” clamdigger (not tapered) as long as it’s at a flattering length. Walk shorts will also work. Heavens, YOU might even get away with harem pants! I saw them work beautifully in Israel so let’s have an open fashion mind. You are tasked!</p> <p>o Cricket – phew! When I see keens around here, I see the variety I linked to below (instant apoplexy). It’s usually worn with a bad basic T-shirt and you guessed it, ankle length leg-shortening capris. So while I think you can go for something a little less “keen looking”, sporty is not bad if the look is a little more refined and NOT gear like. Think along the lines of Merrel, Sketchers, Puma and Cole Haan. </p> <p><a href="http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/3008788?Category=&#038;Search=True&#038;SearchType=keywordsearch&#038;keyword=keens+in+Women%27s+Shoes&#038;origin=searchresults" rel="nofollow">http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/30.....rchresults</a></p> <p>o Tara, hoodies are for the most part a no after a certain age. If you’re sporting the kind that teens wear than definitely not. BUT! A refined cashmere hoodie, or something with that flavour worn in an esoteric and sophisticated kind of a way TOTALLY works in your 40’s, 50’s and 60’s. Laura wore a chic belted hoodie over a dress with boots and tights and pulled it off. I hope that makes sense. Sorry I’m strict with certain things. Just wouldn't be doing my job if I wasn't :0( </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66074 Mon, 18 May 2009 21:51:19 +0000 tarzy 66074@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What's the consensus on hoodies? Are they okay for casual Sunday coffee at Starbucks? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66058 Mon, 18 May 2009 19:00:39 +0000 marianne 66058@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hannah, I think you'd look great in a dress with leggings, and it would be a nice casual look. Maybe try a dress that ends right above the knee cap? </p> <p>I feel like I am only now getting my head around casual. Since YLF I also eliminated anything gear-like from my casual outfits, and after that things somewhat fell into place. My casual is definitely sporty, though. I like Esprit look - a lot of their stuff is too young, but I find that for me some of their jackets and shirts have the right level of casualness and trendiness to keep the outfit from being blah. The most worn things for me this year have been sweater tunics, jeans, doc martens, converse, twill washable jackets, casual button down shirts. I agree, it's harder to put together an interesting casual look and there are not that many places to look for inspiration. All around me I mostly see t-shirts and Tevas, but here I find pictures from GG and Tam very helpful in that aspect. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66055 Mon, 18 May 2009 18:49:25 +0000 HannahC 66055@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>San, thanks so much! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66051 Mon, 18 May 2009 18:11:34 +0000 Anonymous 66051@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I just want to comment on your outfit in the picture. You look very good in this style. I smile everytime I look at the picture. This is a great example of how a string of pearls and a nicer top can take the jeans way up a notch. The pearls and bandana also make a nice contrast.<br /> That is a beautiful picture of you sitting on the sailboat. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-66046 Mon, 18 May 2009 17:38:35 +0000 HannahC 66046@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Kristen, since longer capris are not YLF approved, I guess in the area of capris we are left with clams only. Since I don't wear clams (I don't wear skinny jeans or any of their variations), I too resort to walking shorts - the type that comes almost to the knee (I guess this is what you called bermuda length?) I am wondering what I should wear in place of the t-shirts, though ... Wrap tops are out because they gape or shift when I am running around or climbing. I am trying to wear "nicer t-shirts" - you know, with a nicer neckline, or thicker material. As usual, they don't fit perfectly ... sigh ... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-65959 Mon, 18 May 2009 11:10:31 +0000 Kristen 65959@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Such a great thread, and something I have been thinking a lot of as I rebuild my wardrobe for the summer! Like Marlene, I had not been considering casual to be that important, since for me it only gets worn 2 out of 7 days. But the reality is in the summer, I do shed my work clothes as soon as I get home, and I do have at least two week-long vacations planned -- so I do need more casual outfits than I think, and smart-casual isn't the best option for those times. But I won't go back to my old uniform of just shorts and a solid colored tee-shirt, so I've been stumped.</p> <p>I've started picking up some nice city shorts, knit or structured cotton tops, white denim clamdiggers, and lots of sundresses. I'm okay with leggings, but all the tunics I've found so far are either too boho or too trampy or too expensive, so I don't know if that's a look I will utilize much. I am always going to prefer shorts over capris; shorts are summer to me, and I can't let that go. They're always bermuda length, and this year that's an especially good look for me now that my thighs are a reasonable size *g* and my calves are looking so fit. </p> <p>The tops are killing me -- I'm used to picking up a dozen t-shirts in every color available, and being done with it. Picking them one by one is tough! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-65958 Mon, 18 May 2009 10:50:52 +0000 yublocka 65958@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>HannaC I really like the look of the outfit you wore sailing - I think you pulled off casual very nicely!!!</p> <p>Maya you made me laugh with the "35 years old and I need to refine my look" comment. I'll be approaching 35 in a couple of years and don't own any dressy pumps that are less than 10 years old. I've been thinking I seriously need to look at the "dressier" side of my wardrobe, but truthfully my motivation is low, because like you I am casual most of the time. Means my stress levels do go up whenever I have a dressier occasion, which is only a few times a year thank goodness!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-65953 Mon, 18 May 2009 09:45:12 +0000 HannahC 65953@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Cciele - exactly, the clothes that fit most of the requirements are gym clothes, but I fear Angie will have an apoplexy if we start walking around in gym clothes :)<br /> Also, jeans are fine for cooler months, but not so much when it is over 90 degrees outside Basically, I guess I am looking for a hot weather substitute for a pair of jeans and a nice tee.</p> <p>Marlene - yes, you are absolutely right - I need to get my head around the fact that I need to invest in casual clothes. It makes a huge difference. For example, I have a cute hoodie from Martin&#38;Osa (which I bought to wear during flights), and it looks so much better than just cheap generic hoodies. On the other hand, when I am wearing something nice (even if it is casual), I am constantly nervous about popsicle and grass stains And this kind of defeats the whole purpose of dressing to play with the kids, right?</p> <p>Kari - thanks for the compliment! The pearls are actually real (cultivated)! I agree with you that they are not really appropriate for a sailing lesson, but (1) it was a surprise, so I had no idea what we are going to do, and (2) we went to a nice restaurant for lunch afterward, so I had to be dressed reasonably well - at least the part that is above the table </p> <p>Maya - it is too hot for jeans here from April to November And actually, yes, I am climbing the jungle gym or rolling in the grass every single day with the kids, so dresses are out of the question You are so right about the mindset - I am so used to associate dressing up with a way I dress to work (btw, I dress SC, and I am always overdressed - well, you saw Angie's posts, we are a very very casual country; I just don't give a damn anymore, you know?). Can you believe I still cannot get my head around Converse sneakers? Anyway, it is much too hot for them now ... OK, I must get a Sweet Pea top - this sounds like a great solution. Aren't they too dressy for the kind of the outfit I am after?</p> <p>Tara - your outfit sounds great! And nothing black! Yes, casual is hardest for me in hot weather too, especially because I cannot wear jeans when it is hot, and then I am perplexed about the appropriate bottoms.</p> <p>Angie - I wish I could spend three days with you! Alas, I cannot :(</p> <p>Lwc - oh, it was hardest when one of the kids was nursing in addition to other requirements! Fortunately, I am done with this, but still - being out with three kids, with the youngest under 3, is still a fashion challenge.</p> <p>Judging from all the responses, it seems that a flop-proof outfit is tunic and leggings. Unfortunately, I don't wear leggings (not this time, and not the last time they were around in the '80s -'90s). This is because (1) I have thick thighs, and (2) my legs are X-shaped (that is, they go in in the knees, and out again in the calves). The X-shape is not visible in a knee-length skirt, but it is painfully obvious in leggings and a mid-thigh length tunic. Do you think I can still manage to find the right proportion that will allow me to wear this look? I am also only 5'3'', so I really cannot wear a knee-length dress with leggings - I am too short for this. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-65943 Mon, 18 May 2009 07:03:36 +0000 lwc 65943@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hannah,</p> <p>I hear you on the challenges of dressing casually. I think that it is one of the hardest looks to nail, in part due to the fact that there are differing opinions of what constitutes casual wear. One person's Juicy suit and flip flops, is another person's dark denim skirt, Sweet Pea top, and wedge sandals. I do think that it can be done successfully - even by us mommies.</p> <p>I live in AZ, and it was 105F today. Whew! Many people here dress sub-casually, and I try not to look at that as my standard. I read books, magazines, and forums like this one to stay connected with people who care about dressing properly. I'm constantly learning, training my eye, and fine-tuning my own personal style.</p> <p>It is tough, especially if you're doing it on your own, don't have a babysitter, and don't have the benefit of Angie personally taking you shopping and dressing you for your regular weekly activities. At least we can come here and "drink the Kool-Aid." </p> <p>I am a mom of 2 kids under 3yrs., one of whom is still nursing. Jeans, basic t-shirts, and sandals or sneakers were my previous uniform. I am trying to put together a stylish, colorful, casual wardrobe that will take me from play dates to date nights. It's overwhelming, especially when you're starting over. I am very picky about my purchases, and look for items that can be washed, dressed up or down, mixed and matched, that fit and flatter me, that don't cost a fortune, and that really show my personal style. As cumbersome as it is, I am determined to nail this. Once I get into a groove, I think that it will be easier to shop and put outfits together going forward. </p> <p>Don't give up, and don't give in! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-65937 Mon, 18 May 2009 05:51:44 +0000 Christie 65937@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Angie ... here they are ... <a href="http://www.zappos.com/product/7292350/color/41114" rel="nofollow">http://www.zappos.com/product/7292350/color/41114</a> Tell me the truth. I do want to know! I know they are gear-ish, but are the closest thing I have to a fashion sneaker. And keeping my toes covered in crowds and around my kids (and dirt) is a big deal to me. (BTW, do cons look okay with bermudas? Or is that too young looking?)</p> <p>I appreciated everything you wrote about fitting in but with style. Maybe that's what I mean by "regional." In my sporty casual town, people wear "fashion gear." In a rural farming community, it could be more western-wear oriented. Neither of those looks is *my* look but I still would want to fit in. I guess I've never been one to want to stand out, but I do want to stand tall and know that I am dressing with a good fit, good colors and a style of my own that works anywhere. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-65929 Mon, 18 May 2009 05:00:11 +0000 Angie 65929@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Nice list, Maya. </p> <p>I go through these exact thought processes with many, MANY clients. I'm going to come from another angle! Take it for what it's worth. If you think it's codswallup - that's okay :0). </p> <p>Just because other people are poorly dressed does not mean that you have to be. Set the example. Don’t conform. Be the role model. Think laterally. Change bad dressing habits. By all means stick to the appropriate dress code and "fit in" but do it with style. You can absolutely be casually dressed WITH style. I do not know HOW to stress this point more strongly. Having style does not mean wearing dressy clothes, or even dressing smart casually. My dear Cricket, perhaps you can link to the type of keens you were wearing. I shall not pass judgment until I see the actual shoe! </p> <p>I wish you could all spend three days with me. I'd get you sorted asap. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/why-is-casual-so-hard#post-65927 Mon, 18 May 2009 04:44:54 +0000 Christie 65927@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think casual is a regional thing too. I live in a very casual town so even wearing a skirt with a tee is a step above the norm. I'm just learning to put some accessories with my outfit and I find its making a big difference between "casual" and "put together." </p> <p>Also, shoes change the look so much ... today I wore keen mary janes to a very casual event but my outfit would have been upped a notch with wedge sandals. But I would have been overdressed wearing the dressier shoe. </p>