https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 04 Apr 2026 04:24:00 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682970 Wed, 22 Jun 2016 00:16:02 +0000 catgirl 1682970@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Gaylene, I enjoy it too, especially in the climbing gym when a 17 year old boy's jaw drops at a move I can make.&nbsp; I'm a rebel and iconoclast at heart, and I love challenging people's assumptions and biases. </p> <p>But explaining who I am to people over and over can get exhausting, just as for my friend, getting people to realize that she knows how to tie an anchor or ride single track becomes frustrating.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682960 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 23:58:55 +0000 DonnaF 1682960@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm not sure *happy* is the right word, but at age 63 I'm definitely more at peace with my body and when things stop working or working as well I'm definitely more appreciative of what works.</p> <p>Because of this forum, I no longer take for granted that I have a somewhat defined waist.&nbsp; I no longer take for granted that menopause didn't cause me to gain weight and that I am about the same weight I was as a teenager.&nbsp; I no longer take for granted that I am the same size on top and bottom which means it is easier for me to find a fit than my extremely IT DD-22.&nbsp; I no longer take for granted that I rarely have to worry about a skirt, dress, or pants/jeans being too short, because after all it is easier to shorten garments than to lengthen them.</p> <p>I don't go to a gym; I go to a track, or at least I did before I had to wear this darn boot.&nbsp; Maybe I would feel unhappy if I went to a gym?&nbsp; I certainly don't compare my body to those of 20-somethings, 30-somethings, and 40-somethings; just a different ballgame.&nbsp; And I try not to compare at all because I think it's a real buzzkill.</p> <p>Definitely, age has given me perspective.&nbsp; Plus, I think YLF has enabled me to out-style all those age groups!!!&nbsp; </p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682942 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 23:36:15 +0000 Aziraphale 1682942@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It has taken me a long time to figure out how I'm going to reply to this. How much do I divulge? So here goes. I was treated for an eating disorder in my late teens. I won't get into why it developed in the first place, but by age 19 what I saw in the mirror (fat) did not agree with what everyone else saw (skeleton). So far, so familiar. By 23 I had the warped body image sorted out, but the voice inside that repeatedly reminds me to prove that I am worthy never really goes away. I've had a lifetime to practice fighting it, though, and I've got pretty good at silencing it.&nbsp;</p> <p>Ironically, at middle age, just when the signs of aging are starting to appear, my body image is actually really good -- the best it has ever been. And with all the disease and death that has touched the people in my life lately, I am profoundly grateful for the fact that my body has not yet betrayed me. Everything still works. :-)&nbsp;</p> <p>One thing that's worth pointing out. If you go from ugly duckling to pretty swan, and enjoy a huge boost in popularity because of it: it's very hard not to base your whole self-worth on your appearance. I think if you have a good solid family behind you, and you are sure of their unconditional love, the self-worth comes from inside and you'll be OK. But if you're insecure to begin with, becoming beautiful does not make you a happier person. It makes you believe that being beautiful is the most important thing.</p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682923 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 22:54:40 +0000 Gaylene 1682923@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>OK, I get the external cognitive dissonance, but I kind of enjoy smashing those smug preconceptions. Blowing by a youngster on a black diamond run and whipping off my googles to get a better look at the consternation on his face when he sees my 65+ face makes me unreasonably happy. </p> <p>I can see how the internal fight, though, is more troubling. Still, it strikes me that part of coming to know my own worth is know how to pick the measuring sticks that have meaning for me instead of assuming I share those of others--and that includes family and friends. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682921 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 22:43:19 +0000 em 1682921@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>As I said, I always had a nice figure, which is purely genetic. And I would look in the mirror and say, "Hello Gorgeous" when I got dressed.</p> <p>About a year ago I twisted my back and I could barely walk for a few weeks. The pain was excruciating. Then a few months ago I got a swollen nerve on my foot and could hardly stand for 2 days. Ever since then, whenever I looked into the mirror to get dressed, after saying "Hello Gorgeous" I would do a few stretches, leg lifts, whatever, and think, "YES!" So now I not only am grateful for my body once a day in the morning, I get a thrill every time I get back from a walk, a jog, gardening, playing with kids, etc etc etc.</p> <p>I like my body because it is attractive. I love it because it works. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682919 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 22:34:24 +0000 aly 1682919@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I will add my voice to those who are perfectly happy with their bodies. Its not perfect...but that is not the point. It is perfectly capable.</p> <p>I have to say I am not "proud" of my body because I have never had to work on it - I am proud of my poor brain because it has worked very very hard these last few years. I am proud of the effort it has been willing to put in. Proud of the times it has been willing to bravely face difficulties...knowing full well that it will take months to heal from the damage the "difficulty" will do. Proud that it is still willing to work tirelessly towards health.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682914 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 22:18:19 +0000 catgirl 1682914@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Gaylene, I have an idea of what Lisa means: our clothes and shape and style don't always match our self-image or abilities.&nbsp; A dear friend of mine is, as she would put it, of stocky Teutonic build and&nbsp;shaped like a barrel.&nbsp; She has fought against it with diet and exercise, but there's nothing she can do to change her basic build, any more than I can change my shoulders.&nbsp; Point being, she can&nbsp;more than&nbsp;keep up with the rest of my intimidatingly fit friends and kick our butts at certain activities like biking or weight-lifting.&nbsp; She finds it very insulting (as do I!) when people talking about their latest athletic feats- which is what people do&nbsp;here -&nbsp;don't think to include her because she doesn't&nbsp;resemble&nbsp;their idea of a mountain biker or rock climber.&nbsp; </p> <p>This happens to me sometimes too&nbsp;- fit young things look at me and see an "older" Indian woman, with all the stereotypical connotations that brings (I can list them if you want, but they are not me).&nbsp;It's that&nbsp;cognitive dissonance between how we look and what we can do, both with outsiders and in our own minds.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682903 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 21:58:10 +0000 Gaylene 1682903@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>OK, now I'm seriously fascinated. How can body appearance and functionality be two very different things? </p> <p>I understand the social benefits which accrue from being aesthetically pleasing to others, but to see that quest as being separate from functionality seems to be rather unworkable unless you have a very particular lifestyle where form is everything. For the rest of us, as Staysfit so eloquently puts it, form needs to be balanced by functionality to live a full and satisfying life. </p> <p>Which, to me, is the point Angie is making. Focusing on form to the point where we get depressed or miserable tips the scales too far. It's fine to work towards an aesthetically pleasing appearance as long as the aesthetic is of MY choosing and doesn't relegate function to the sidelines. </p> <p>We are human beings with lives and families who operate in a myriad of settings and responsibilities, not static works of art. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682800 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 18:20:10 +0000 catgirl 1682800@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What Lisa said. I am actually writing what is turning out to be an Atlantic length essay to express my thoughts on all the recent body posts. But as far as function, I can climb, hike, ski, surf and hopefully get back to mountain biking again. I look at my body the way I do my house - there's always something that needs painting, fixing or maintenance, but would I move out altogether at this point? I don't think so. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682790 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 18:04:02 +0000 Anonymous 1682790@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I see body appearance and function as two very different things. I'm not going to carry on about appearance here -especially after Angie's forum post yesterday- so re: body function and ability ? You bet I am happy. &nbsp;The only thing I regret is that I can't run or do anything high impact anymore due to a permanent knee cartilage issue. But I am very very happy with my strength, athletic ability , coordination , and overall health. &nbsp;I am so mindful of that part because of what my own mom had to deal with (a degenerative muscular disease that had no cure) starting when she was about my age. &nbsp;So I am pretty darn thankful every day of the week that I have a high-functioning body with really strong legs, shoulders and arms. &nbsp;I can hit a golf ball really well, hit a tennis ball really well, &nbsp;bike at a high speed for ages, walk forever, &nbsp;haul things around in my garden (I pulled a crappy old Juniper bush out by the roots last week !) , push stuff around, lift my bike high over my head etc etc. &nbsp;And I will NEVER take that stuff for granted. I work for it, and appreciate it. &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682770 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 17:31:08 +0000 Suz 1682770@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>Staysfit</b>, you are a lovely person. Thank you for sharing your experience with us. Puts it all in perspective.&nbsp;</p> <p>I'm happy with my body, yes. Do I think it's perfect? No. But it is a pretty amazing and resilient gift.&nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682742 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 16:40:56 +0000 Gaylene 1682742@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've always liked my body, even as a teenager, but I suspect my liking has a great deal to do with my measuring stick.</p> <p>Since my broad shouldered IT body shape never fit conventional feminine norms, I've always been more interested in clothing it for a functional, active lifestyle than for fashion. I suspect this focus insulated me from a lot of the body image angst which was rampant in my peers. I was also lucky enough to marry a man who admired my strength, fitness, and endurance. As the sole female in a family of males, I could keep up with them and enjoy the activities they enjoyed. </p> <p>It was only in my forties, when I had more time to spend with my girlfriends and to play with fashion, that I realized how out of step I was with prevailing female norms.. Most non-athletic clothes were not cut for my body--my shoulders were too wide, my arms and legs were too muscular, my waistline was too large and in the "wrong" place, my feet were too large--the list of ways my body wasn't "right" was so alarming it was almost laughable. And, as if that wasn't enough, the first signs of aging were starting to appear. </p> <p>I honestly think it was the overwhelming number of ways my body wasn't going to fit into prevailing norms of feminine beauty that made me just turn away from the whole cultural expectations thing. I had zero interest in re-shaping and re-designing a functional body I had enjoyed inhabiting for almost half a century just to fit some arbitrary notion of feminine beauty. </p> <p>By my standards, I'm just fine as I am--and my liking extends to the signs of aging I'm seeing as the years pile on. I'm more interested in keeping my body strong and flexible than I am with fighting wrinkles and cellulite. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682700 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 15:09:40 +0000 JAileen 1682700@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm pretty happy in spite of having gained weight. I love Staysfit's response - yes, I'm happy with my brain! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682673 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 14:33:23 +0000 MsMary 1682673@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I echo much of what Linda said. My mom passed her body image issues on to me, and I also married two men who criticized my body all the time (because, I guess, I thought that people who love you tell you that your body isn't good enough -- crazy!).</p> <p>These days I'm pretty darned happy with my body, after a lifetime of serious body issues! I struggled with my weight beginning at age 9, and six years ago I had weight-loss surgery that was really life-changing for me. I love that I can walk into a store and find clothes to fit, I love that I can ride my bike 30-plus miles, I love that I can crush it at the gym. As I get older (I'm 57 now) I am so, so grateful that I'm still reasonably fit and agile and active. And I'm engaged to a lovely man who loves my body just the way it is, which has been incredibly healing. I have bits I'm not crazy about, but generally I'm feeling okay about my body at last. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682649 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 14:10:50 +0000 Linda 1682649@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am very happy with my body. &nbsp;However, I'm 63 and this hasn't always been the case. &nbsp;I was raised by a mother who, to this day, has a serious eating disorder and a very poor body image. &nbsp;It has taken me years to actually realize this, and unfortunately her issues were passed along to me. &nbsp;Fortunately, I have always been active, a bit of a tomboy really, and that has kept me healthy and trim. &nbsp;Also, my diet has always included fresh vegetables, fruits and whole grains. &nbsp;Growing up, my weight has always been fine, but my mother convinced me I needed to lose weight, even though I was never overweight. &nbsp;</p> <p>Only in my 50s did I come to actually begin to appreciate my body, and give up on being elusively "thin". &nbsp;My body is toned from daily running or swimming, and my posture is good due to my yoga practice. &nbsp;I'm in better shape than a lot of 30 year olds. &nbsp;I can run 6 miles or swim a mile easily. &nbsp;At one time, I thought that if an article of clothing didn't look good on me, it was my fault. &nbsp;Now, I only buy things that fit and look great. &nbsp;If they don't, it's not meant for me! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682643 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 14:04:36 +0000 RobinF 1682643@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I wouldn't say I am happy with my body but I am most of the time OK with it. I have always struggled with my weight but have managed to keep it pretty consistent so I think this is just who I am. I'm 54 and trying to get used to wrinkles and sags that weren't there before. And I know when I am working out regularly and eating better I feel a lot better in general so I try to do that.&nbsp;</p> <p>Love the poem Ladonna posted!</p> <p>And I appreciate those of you who admit you have it a little easier because genetically you fit the accepted norm. It's nice to hear that you understand that it isn't easy for everyone but I also get that you may also have your own issues to deal with. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682637 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 13:49:49 +0000 LilMrsNomad 1682637@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am happy with my body. It is fitter and stronger than it has ever been before. It has helped grow and birth two beautiful boys. There are areas I would like to work on but I am trying very hard to appreciate my body for what it is, rather than focus on what I would like it to be. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682568 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 11:54:02 +0000 Anonymous 1682568@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm generally happy, as I am able to fit into off-the-rack clothing most of the time, and I am in very good general health. What I'm not happy about is the chronic pain I have to endure. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies/page/2#post-1682560 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 11:30:40 +0000 Sheila 1682560@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes I am happy with my in general body. </p> <p>Sure I am nit-picky about low slung boobs, saggy upper arms.. but in general I know that I am extremely lucky.</p> <p>I am flexible, slim with zero cardio. I have very little muscle mass but I am small boned and light and not afraid to jump, run, bend ... do anything. At 56 , and after four children and years of breast feeding... I have won the lotto. BUT you know, I am the oldest of seven and all five of the my sisters are the same way, same non-athletic but slim build. It may have something to do with who your grandfather was... and who can control this ? Nobody now. It is what it is...</p> <p>Clothes fit me- right off the rack... and although I have always taken this for granted, NOW&nbsp; I know it is a present. </p> <p>IF I do complain, I am immediately chastised- which I hate. Everyone else can complain... I do ... it is dead silence or someone tells me to be quiet. Unfair... so I keep my body insecurities to myself. We are women... we ALL have them... look at the media and what is held up as the standard. It is non-attainable.</p> <p>I do see enviable figures out there... but I am OK with my lot in life.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682525 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 10:08:08 +0000 Sisi 1682525@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Staysfit, you are so dear, thank<br /> you so much for your comment! </p> <p>It has been very helpful. It made me think. </p> <p>I am aware of the fact that the darn perfectionism complicates my life in many fields. </p> <p>You are right, my measuring stick definitely is doing me a disservice.</p> <p>I&nbsp;will try to change it!</p> <p>Much love, </p> <p>S.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682522 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 09:57:37 +0000 Style Fan 1682522@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I love what Staysfit just wrote.&nbsp; What is perfect?&nbsp; It also makes me sad to see the discussions about poor body image on the forum.&nbsp; But it is everywhere unfortunately. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682506 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 08:56:31 +0000 Staysfit 1682506@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sisi, who are you letting define perfect?! To often we go by standards determined by men, or by skinny fashion models. What is your measuring stick of perfection? Mine is that I can wake up every day. I can go to work. Sometimes I cannot because I am ill enough to be hospitalized, but my body has a remarkable ability to heal and recover enough that I go home and function again and I find that miraculous. My body allows me to go for walks with my neighbor. I can meet friends for an evening out. I can enjoy my time with my family. Spend time with my children. I can still travel to see my parents. My body can still bend and move enough to do Pilates and yoga. I have great memories of running marathons and waterskiing, swimming and boating. I can hike and snow shoe. My body can wear nice clothes. My body houses my brain which reads great books, enjoys music, movies, plays, etc. My body loves the work I do, which is intellectual and also involves connecting with people. My body was fortunate and gave me my two wonderful children, but my brain which is part of my body helped me raise them into the awesome adults they are today, (because they both have autism.) My measuring stick has nothing to do with what I see in the mirror or how my clothing fits. It has to do with how my body functions and serves me. So, what is your measuring stick and why? Can you alter your measuring stick if it is doing you a disservice? Helping people, particularly children and adolescents has been my life mission. It makes me so sad to see so much about poor body image here on the forum lately. However, it's a testament to Angie that people feel so comfortable opening up about it. All I see is beauty and bravery here. Kudos and Love to all of you! XO </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682495 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 08:29:09 +0000 Sisi 1682495@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am not.</p> <p>I am too much of a perfectionist to be happy with anything that is less than perfect.</p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682476 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 07:57:21 +0000 Astrid 1682476@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am also happy with my body, even though there are downs sometimes... I've had various health issues over the years which made me sometimes not like my body very much, but it's the only one I have and I'd like to enjoy the time I have on this planet. </p> <p>That's a thing that has always bugged me to be honest, the shift from looks to ability. It's all well and good to say love your body for what it can do, but what if it can't do many things you would really like to do? </p> <p>I also have to agree on ill fitting clothes being a huge problem - I felt very uncomfortable at my highest weight, but more because I thought nothing looked good on me and nothing fit right. I was fine with my body when I was naked. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682444 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 06:05:01 +0000 Sally 1682444@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I have more body confidence now than I had in my 20s and 30s. Maybe I've grown into it. I have lost weight recently and do worry sometimes whether I can maintain it. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682391 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 03:42:26 +0000 Carla 1682391@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes, I am. Very. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682378 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 03:13:19 +0000 Firecracker (Sharan) 1682378@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am. <br />Wait, does that include the face? If so, my answer would be, I am, mostly. Ha haha! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682370 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 02:52:32 +0000 Anonymous 1682370@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sorry, I should acknowledge that I am also playing on easy mode. It is easy for me to lose and gain weight.<br /> I had Graves disease (hormone imbalance) for a while and was given<br /> Meds that caused me to gain weight without any change in diet. I do know that hormones play a huge part in weight. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682365 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 02:46:28 +0000 Anonymous 1682365@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I do have hangups about my body but I would never cry about them or let them make me feel bad about myself as a person! </p> <p>Thank Goodness I dont have real "body issues" because I have so many other issues to deal with! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/who-is-happy-with-their-bodies#post-1682364 Tue, 21 Jun 2016 02:45:39 +0000 Echo 1682364@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Bravo to Greyscale and Staysfit. I like the acknowledging when one is "playing on easy mode." It is not as easy for me as it once was, but it is far easier for me than for many others, and I must accept that gratefully and do my part.&nbsp;</p> <p>But what Staysfit resonates most with me. I am not coordinated, nor am I athletic. Nor are my children. However, I've always said that college entrance exams have never included skipping or dancing. I am forever grateful to my mum and dad for the brain I was born with. Despite sometimes wishing I could more easily change my body, I would never change who I am or "the brainy part". </p>