https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 02 May 2026 08:55:05 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle/page/2#post-1510755 Thu, 25 Jun 2015 03:20:10 +0000 Maneera 1510755@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>All this talk of dressier clothes for casual life reminded me of this girl I meet everyday when walking my dog. She wears bodycon dresses that are too short in my opinion and floor sweeping maxi dresses and even extremely beautiful flared dresses I would only wear for parties/dancing when she's walking her dog. She stands out....and sometimes looks downright ridiculous chasing after her dog (who is never on a leash) with her maxi dress sloppily gathered up in her hands so it doesn't get tangled in her feet. Some days she does look absolutely lovely and she always looks confident in what she's wearing....like she doesn't care at all if what she's wearing is 100% inappropriate for a dog walk. </p> <p>I don't think I can wear similar outfits for walking my dog, but I would definitely like to channel her self confidence. I am almost always dressed in workout clothes on these walks as I have a large breed dog who is on the leash and we like to brisk walk, not stroll. Plus, I can't put up with my upper thighs rubbing together and chaffing when I walk faster wearing skirts/dresses. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle/page/2#post-1510734 Thu, 25 Jun 2015 02:33:58 +0000 Maneera 1510734@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Great suggestions Aida and UmmLila</p> <p>A routine is great and I've always had one. I also have a dedicated home office complete with desk, chair and desktop and have never ever worked sitting on my couch! ( though I have sat at the dining table a few odd times). </p> <p>I think my final solution would be:</p> <p>1. Find nicer fabrics, cuts and designs in casuals. I already have way too many bottoms, I will do the closet inventory today and find out numbers. If you guys would like to be a part of the journey, I'll post the numbers here to be more accountable. </p> <p>2. Not feel weird about changing my outfit more often in a day. Several of you suggest that. I actually already change 3 outfits a day. One - what I wear after a shower ( i wear this outfit from 9 to 6). Two - what I wear to exercise (this is only sportswear. I do not feel comfortable in regular clothes as I need sweat wicking fabrics if I want to give my 100% to the workout). Three - after the workout, I come home and shower again and change into my sleeping shorts and T-shirt. I cannot repeat nightwear, as I jump out of bed and make breakfast in this outfit. But this feels 'normal' as I've been doing this for the last 5 years. </p> <p>Essentially, the cooking happens between 5pm to 6pm and I'm going to stop being such a baby and just wear an apron to cook. My problem could very well be that I over-care for stuff and tend to keep anything and everything for 'special occasions'. Well, they never come around, and I have far too many clothes and too few such occasions. My nicer clothes never wear out, my shoes never wear not ( apart from my sneakers. I go through 3 pairs in a year) and then I feel bad adding 'new' to my closet. How darn silly!!! </p> <p>Again, thanks a ton. You all really helped. </p> <p>I'm off to count my closer numbers now. Wish me luck!!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle/page/2#post-1510680 Thu, 25 Jun 2015 00:20:18 +0000 UmmLila (Lisa) 1510680@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I have a few more thoughts, having been in the work from home groove for more than 15 years.</p> <p>I probably work in the range of 45-50 hours per week, but spread out. I therefore end up changing clothes during the day, or adding and subtracting, to accommodate TRX, Pilates and yoga classes, dog runs and dog walks according to season. I do like to feel dressier when I am working, even though I don't wear shoes In the house. My shoes are probably all in the closet crying 'pick me, pick me,' because I love them and have lots but they don't get out much.</p> <p>How I feel dressier: either dressier versions of casual items (e.g., just as people have said -- tees in silk, linen or poly) or casualized versions of more formal items (e.g. knit blazer and jackets).</p> <p>I agree that it's very tough in your climate. I started my post university work life in Cairo, which is very hot and dusty for most of the year and required washing everything you wore just one time, and sometimes twice daily showers. I was into long silk and viscose skirts then. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510632 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 21:22:54 +0000 annabelle 1510632@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Can I reverse-award a Comedy to Maneera? " I just cannot imagine cooking in the outfit you mentioned" tee hee&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510623 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 21:01:50 +0000 Aida 1510623@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lots of good suggestions already. Particularly echoing getting nicer fabrications, or natural fibers, in your casual pieces.</p> <p>I essentially work from home; I say "essentially" because I actually work with my dad at my parent's home office, along with occasionally working from my own home. It's a real office (complete with fluorescent lights) but it's still "working from home". I'm almost always the dressiest one here Actually driving to work seems to help my focus a LOT, so I do my best to avoid working from my own home as much as possible.</p> <p>It was a real struggle to find the right balance for a loooong time! I think that it's particularly difficult because what helps one person may not help another (for example, I haaaaate wearing jeans when I'm actually working at home!). For myself, I decided what I needed was a way to feel like there's some sort of separation in events; wearing the same stuff to work and on the weekend and out with friends... it just made me grumpy and frustrated.</p> <p>So I split my wardrobe up into three parts even though, really, it's all pretty much casual wear: work, weekend, and active-casual. My work outfits are my more fashion-forward looks and veer dressy (most of them I'd say are smart-casual); my weekend outfits veer more towards things my husband likes so are much simpler, a bit more rugged, and more casual; and active-casual is the really casual stuff that I can go romp around outdoors in (the toughest category for me). There's certainly overlap across those categories though, and I don't have them separated in my closet.</p> <p>What this does is allow me to feel like I'm getting "dressed for work" every day, and having a few weekend-only pieces helps give me some sort of separation in utility. But of course, dressy "work" pieces can be easily combined with casual "weekend" pieces for a nicer casual look, and ultra casual "active" pieces can be easily combined with casual "weekend" pieces for more polished ultra casual looks. And I can always combine several dressier pieces if I have a meeting and need to look presentable.</p> <p>A few other things that help me: </p> <ul> <li>Start the day by actually getting ready -- shower, dress, make up, breakfast, the whole shebang. No work until I've done all that.</li> <li>I also change into more casual, comfortable home clothing when I'm done working for the day. Though I am not opposed to cooking in most of my work clothes ;)</li> <li>Have a dedicated work area, even at home. I work at a desk; if I work on the couch it's hard not to just want to stay in PJs!</li> <li>Have primarily walkable shoes (both heels and flats). I used to wear mostly sitting shoes, since I mostly sit and those 4" heels are oh-so-pretty. But over the past few years I've been diligently working towards a shoe wardrobe that I can walk a few hours in -- I figure on being able to, at minimum, comfortably go out shopping although of course I do have a couple proper dressy pairs for proper dressy occasions. I now go out and walk a couple times a day, even in my "work wear", and am very happy to be able to do it comfortably.</li> <li>Determining where I could be happy with casual and where I needed the polish (e.g. fresh face and crazy hair is a-ok with me, but my shoes really need to be refined). This is going to be different for everyone of course.</li> <li>Allow myself to be dressy for "work", even though I don't <i>have</i> to be.</li> <li>And keep in mind that just because it's casual doesn't mean it can't be polished or refined.</li> </ul> <ul> </ul> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510581 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 19:59:30 +0000 Suz 1510581@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>If you love button downs and wear them well, then for sure add them to your at-home rotation! I wear them here in spring, fall, and on cooler summer days, and in winter I wear them in a warmer fabrication (flannel) so they are cozy. They are great for those of us who like a bit of structure! Then the bottoms can be as easy as you wish.&nbsp;</p> <p>I hear you on resisting the count. But it's okay. There is nothing inherently wrong with a large wardrobe. And the only way to find <b>your </b>perfect size is to experiment a bit.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510568 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 19:07:33 +0000 Jessica 1510568@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I don't think there's anything wrong with dressing up when you work from home. It's your home! Make Mondays and Wednesdays dress-up days or something. If it's not an issue of having to sacrifice clothing you genuinely need for your lifestyle, then go for it. Pencil skirts don't inhibit work just 'cause you're in your own house, do they?</p> <p>Even for relatively casual weekend activities, I think structured outfits are perfectly acceptable. I think there are plenty of structured dresses and pumps that might be considered "fancy," but are still appropriate for most outings. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510554 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 18:19:57 +0000 Maneera 1510554@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>@Suz, I have been resisting counting for a whole other reason. I feel if I actually have the numbers infront of me and have proof that 50% of my wardrobe or more doesn't get more than 1 wear per season, I'll feel even more guilty. I know it's silly. I can't pretend I don't already know that. But I do have a large wardrobe so I'm thinking I better do this exercise and find out for sure. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510550 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 18:12:53 +0000 Maneera 1510550@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Again, good questions. I can answer these ones. I like:</p> <p>1. The fit of dressier pieces. They are fitted at the waist, which is my narrowest part. </p> <p>2. Often the way a structured fabric sculpts the body. It holds everything in and for that precise reason it's also not always comfortable to wear at home. Also, the fabric feels more upscale and is thicker, so has a more luxe feel. </p> <p>3. I have already identified that I love detailing on these pieces. Side ruching, pleats, wrap detailing, belts etc. I am aware that I can find comfortable knit tops with these detailing, but I haven't actually found any as yet. I'll continue to search, but I feel that most brands either carry very casual collections or very dressy ones in fabrics that don't breathe well. </p> <p>While I was writing this, I also had a lightbulb moment. I could really just wear more shirts! Button downs. I love them, I have quite a few in pretty patterns as well as solids,so why not wear them with pants and shorts! I wil also start wearing a belt from tomorrow. I noticed for myself that I've mentioned them more than once on this thread and probably hadn't realized how much I love them. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510545 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 18:01:22 +0000 Maneera 1510545@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks Robin. For me, work has set hours even from home. I work 9 to 5 and never ever beyond that coz I pack so many other activities into my day. So I think your idea is a good one. </p> <p>Alasse, you read my mind. I do intend to go find patterned and dressy looking comfortable, stretchy knits I can wear at home. Yes, knits wear out more often when you wear them all day long and wash often, but I honestly don't mind that at all. </p> <p>Also, I would like to point out that my clothes need a wash after every single wear. It's hot, sweaty, dusty in India and if you wear something white, it won't last a whole day without looking filthy. So yes, what I do actually wear often doesn't last past a season. But that's not something that bothers me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510543 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:58:21 +0000 Anonymous 1510543@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>haha, unfrumped, I think we cross-posted. Really, I didn't just cut-and-paste your post </p> <p>ETA and off-topic: unfrumped, thank you for the mention of the Daily Connoiseur article! I can completely identify with feeling a little embarrassed when I dress up.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510541 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:57:29 +0000 rachylou 1510541@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Right now I have a closet full of silky shirts and other office clothes I'm not wearing since I'm not going into an office. I don't want to trash them. I'm pondering the quandary. </p> <p>Meantime, I do have an officey at home capsule, meant to suffer... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510540 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:57:09 +0000 Anonymous 1510540@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hmmmm....<br />Can you narrow down specifically what about the dressy clothes makes you feel fab? Is it the fabrics? The slimming effect? The hugging of the curves? The cut of the neckline?</p> <p>Maybe you could try to find some of these elements in casual wear. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510539 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:54:54 +0000 unfrumped 1510539@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes, Maneera, that approach may be right on. I like Joy's reminder of the Sporty Luxe category and Suz's attempts to "drill down" (forgive me, I hate that expression) to what ticks the happy boxes. Is it color, shine, fabric, structure, detail, great workmanship, being very nicely fitted (opposite of sloppy), any or all, what feels closest to your style persona but is <u>real</u>, and practical. That may address everyday happiness factor. Then still can use any reasonable excuse for dressing up even when others might--read Daily Connoisseur on "Dealing with Attention" </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510538 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:54:43 +0000 Suz 1510538@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, what <b>Alasse</b> says is also key. One reason I like my summer wardrobe is the stretch tube skirts...I can wear them for work at home but they dress up well, too....So I get to have my cake and eat it, too. :)&nbsp;</p> <p>I resisted counting wears for a while. But <b>Caro</b> suggested it, and she is wise, and I listened.&nbsp;</p> <p>I think I'd resisted because I thought I knew more or less what I was wearing and what I wasn't. (I don't have a massive wardrobe so I could remember).&nbsp;</p> <p>Well, that was true. I <b>DID</b> have a pretty good handle on what was getting worn.&nbsp;</p> <p>What I didn't have was a clear idea about <b>WHY </b>-- and counting helped me reflect more specifically on that. I am not counting summer wears this season as most of my wardrobe is a repeat of last year's and it is my shorter season (plus, my happiness factor is higher). But it was a really, really useful exercise! I wish you luck with it! You will probably find that you edit your closet as you make your list. &nbsp;:)</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510537 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:54:39 +0000 Maneera 1510537@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lol Suz...your outing with your friend sounds like my outings!!! My closest girlfriend refuses to wear what I call 'grown up' clothing.... Lol! Thankfully my friends don't mind that I'm almost always overdressed....they know my dressy look is just 'me'. </p> <p>I do not plan on changing that!!! </p> <p>Annabelle, I will check out the blog. Thanks for the url. To answer to your initial response - a pencil skirt and button down DO NOT work for my lifestyle at all. If it did hypothetically, I can never imagine wearing those without the right accessories - pumps, waist cinching belts, small jewelry, etc. and those I simply cannot wear at home because they will interfere with almost EVERYTHING I do around the house. I work, cook, do laundry, walk my dog and go out to buy groceries etc in what I wear through the day, and I just cannot imagine cooking in the outfit you mentioned. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510534 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:51:34 +0000 Robin 1510534@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>While I doubt you'd want to wear a dress or pencil skirt when jogging or walking with your dog, there's no rule saying you can't wear them, or other structured items, while you're working. If you're concerned about damaging them too quickly, you could always invest in a few big, colourful aprons to co-ordinate with some of your favourite outfits. </p> <p>You're also allowed to change your clothes during the day. So, if you're working in the morning, you can wear your work clothes, then change into a casual outfit to walk the dog - or wear your work clothes all day, then change when work is finished. (Yes, I know, work is never actually finished if you do it from home, but having a structured work day is also a healthy goal. :)aYour reply </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510528 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:48:45 +0000 Alassë 1510528@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Maneera, I think you're spot on.&nbsp;"...I need to find casuals that are only casual in there comfort and care factor, but actually have a dressy vibe to them."&nbsp;</p> <p>This is what I suggest. Wear stretch pencil skirts, knit dresses that look like office wear, and knit/stretch button-downs. (Cotton shirtdresses also work well.) If you have an outside-the-house errand that day, you have an excuse to dress up (groceries, post office, etc.). Make peace with dressing a level above your peers (it sounds like you already do) - even at home. And when other people do smart casual, you dress business: sheath dresses, suit jacket + pencil skirt, etc.</p> <p>I wear the above, plus dressy knits (personal preference) and flared skirts, at home. (I do have a desk-and-chair setup for my computer, which helps.) </p> <p>ETA: I agree with Robin below, about changing as necessary. Wear your nice outfit and change into gear when walking the dog. Works for me!</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510524 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:44:16 +0000 Liz 1510524@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'd make sure your dissatisfaction really is with your clothes, and not with your lifestyle.&nbsp;<br /><i><br /></i>Also, there is nothing to say you can't wear your office clothes during the week when you're out and about. Or even at home. It sounds like you have lots of clothes; if some of them get worn out or damaged, it will be fine. &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510522 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:42:43 +0000 Maneera 1510522@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I just read all your points again. I like to be very very thorough and I like a solution-driven approach to everything in life. </p> <p>I cannot thank you enough for this. Unfrumped, Suz and Joy....thank you. </p> <p>Some things are very clear to me now. I know the final solution - I have to bridge the gap between what I wear through the week at home and what I wear on weekends to go out. I'm not saying I should be able to use 100% of my wardrobe on any given day, but Atleast 70% needs to be wearable on any given day. Once I achieve this, I think I'll achieve the balance I crave. </p> <p>Also, I do love Suz's idea of that spreadsheet. At least it'll make it clear to me what clothes I actually like to wear or need to wear, and can at least stop buying the categories that aren't getting enough use. How I'll use the existing pieces is another story, but I think I'll get there. </p> <p>It's also clear to me that this will be work in progress. Either I will find the middle ground like Viva, or I'll learn to make peace with dressing for function by injecting a few 'happy factors' here and there. But first, I must begin with a closet audit. I don't actually know how much wear each item in my closet gets. </p> <p>Thanks again. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510516 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:36:49 +0000 crutcher 1510516@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Solution to your problem...You said wearing the dressy business casual clothes made your heart sing...You said that you "should" change the way you dress...I really want to know why?....You don't sound like a crowd pleaser type of woman...Why don't you just make yourself happy and keep dressing the way it takes to make your heart sing?...<br />I know this is a simplistic solution but it is from my heart...I just don't understand why you feel a burning need to change what works for you...<br />Problem solved..let's go for a coffee...smile... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510515 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:35:10 +0000 Suz 1510515@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>And another thought -- one reason I prefer summer clothing (in my climate) is that I can wear white bottoms. As Angie says, white feels "dressier" than denim even if it is a jean (which, conveniently, can be tossed in the wash).&nbsp;</p> <p>So maybe in your situation, it would be useful to identify the neutral that makes you feel fab and that has a bit more inherent dressiness than denim blue or khaki green?&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510512 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:32:54 +0000 Suz 1510512@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>annabelle</b> -- in theory that should work, right? But in practice...when you are curled up on your couch with a laptop, running out to walk your dog, or sitting (as I am now) on a saddle chair -- a pencil skirt and white button front shirt don't cut it. I tried and tried, and it just won't work. I get irritated at having to change too many times in a day.&nbsp;</p> <p>Having said that, I think your approach <b>does </b>work for others and might work for Maneera!&nbsp;</p> <p>Maneera, Zara definitely sells the kind of top I am thinking about -- at least sometimes. Here are a few that I got from them last year. I have also had success at J. Crew for linen (and a few decorative cotton) tees, and I believe Madewell also has some good linens.&nbsp;</p> <p>I generally prefer a shirt/ blouse to a tee myself because I like the neckline structure, but sometimes a tee is the only thing that will work.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510511 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:25:44 +0000 Suz 1510511@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, just jumping in to add: I also love <b>Joy'</b>s solution -- nicer fabrics for casual. Almost all my tees/ sleeveless summer tops now are linen or silk, or they are cotton with very interesting patterns. In winter I aimed for a few fun new silhouettes, and my sweaters are mostly cashmere. I wear them for everything, from working to skating. Wash them in the machine.</p> <p>I also wash my silks and hang to dry.&nbsp;</p> <p>And <b>Joy </b>and <b>kkards</b> also made another really good point: it is important to book outings! Mr. Suz and I have theatre tickets every year so that is a dressy occasion; I have my own occasional appearances (sometimes dressy, sometimes not); I volunteer for an organization that has a few dressy events per year, and so on.&nbsp;</p> <p>Even so, here's something that happens quite a lot: &nbsp;last night I went for a pub supper with a friend. She was wearing yoga pants, Sketchers sneakers, and a tee shirt. I wore my mule sandals, a knit tube skirt, a silk sleeveless top, and a cobalt bag. Plus a cuff and necklace. Overdressed, me? &nbsp;;) &nbsp; Never mind. I had fun.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510510 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:25:02 +0000 annabelle 1510510@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi Maneera, I love this thread!</p> <p>I had an initial reaction - which I will share - but I also love all the suggestions already offered.</p> <p>My first thought was, wear a pencil skirt, button up white oxford and a heeled sandal in the home office (it's summer where I live). I.e., there's nothing less comfortable or functional in these pieces than there is in a breezy t-shirt and cropped pants. As <b>unfrumped</b> says, find a middle ground when you purchase a trim jacket with a wrap style in lieu of a classic navy blazer. </p> <p>If you are at your most comfortable in a more structured look, go for it! You should be dressing for yourself, not your expectations of yourself. </p> <p>You might enjoy some of the information on into-mind.com <a href="http://into-mind.com/2012/12/20/building-a-capsule-wardrobe-101/" rel="nofollow">http://into-mind.com/2012/12/2.....drobe-101/</a>&nbsp; The site is a little overwhelming as Anuschka's posts link to prior posts (that of course you want to dive into!) and you can feel like "I'll never get there!" Search for her posts on "elements." You will find an exercise where you list 20 (20!) elements you want in your wardrobe (unstructured, blue, tigerstripes, not peplums, etc.). I started with her posts on getting to a "uniform," which I call a style formula. I still am not where I want to be in defining my style monikers - it takes time - but I think you will enjoy the process of listing the elements that make you feel amazing when you wear them. </p> <p>Into-mind also has a set of what Anuschka calls "proportions" which might be fun to look through, to see which outfit formulas appeal to your instincts right now. </p> <p>I'm looking forward to following this thread and your other posts, and being inspired. </p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510509 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:24:48 +0000 Maneera 1510509@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Suz, I actually read your old thread and that started me on this crazy chain of thoughts. It's linked to Angie's post on how to feel fab when you work from home. I like your ideas. Thanks a ton. I think it's the other way round for me....I almost always feel good about myself in winter. I have tons of styles in jackets, costs, sweaters etc and our winter isn't severe. By the time I wear everything, winter is over. And I love boots so much that I wait for what winter. But skirts and dresses are out of question in winter so it never bothers me that I don't wear them enough. My problem is summer. But I understand what you're saying, and I do need to spend more time thinking how to look and feel dressy at home. </p> <p>Umfrumped, you ask some very good questions. When I say I'll 'ruin' clothes by wearing at home, I'm talking about dresses sold as corporate wear. They are polyester with ir without some stretch and are very fitted, often with belts. I actually bought these dresses from brands that sell clothes ONLY for formal wear. I know that's where the problem started...I never should've collected these clothes to begin with. They are all part of suits, skirts and dresses, but I didn't pick Blazers because those I can't wear at all (too warm here). Wearing these at home will ruin them, not to mention they will also be very uncomfortable. I haven't ever tried, so maybe I'll actually wear a dress with some stretch and see how it feels. </p> <p>The other great question you point n so does Joy - is my wardrobe lacking smart casual tops? Like silk tees? I think it does. Since I rarely pick tees, it's possible I haven't even noticed these tops at all. Does Zara sell them? If I can find tops/tees that I look AND feel good in, I might not really feel this way. </p> <p>Joy, thank you so much for your advice. It does make sense. </p> <p>To me, it's looking more and more like I need to find casuals that are only casual in there comfort and care factor, but actually have a dressy vibe to them. Am I correct? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510502 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 17:15:47 +0000 viva 1510502@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I work from home too, and it's particularly hard to be one of us and also love clothing/fashion. I still struggle with the reality/fantasy dilemma myself but thanks to YLF I have gotten better at amping up my casual looks so that I feel and look more pulled together (usually) and happier as a result. I've also found more fun ways to do going out wear in a less traditional, less classically dressy way. As a result I spend more time dressing in the happy valley between ultra casual and dressy, and that's probably where I will stay most of the time. It's an ongoing process through and some days are still a struggle. There is a lot of good advice on this forum and I am sure you will find your way. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510498 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 16:52:18 +0000 Anonymous 1510498@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Maneera, I live a casual retired life style but like to be dressed up too. We buy season tickets to the symphony and theater so that most of the year there is at least one, often 2 occasions to dress up plus I wear my dresses and skirts to church. I really look forward to dressing beyond casually.<br /> Another thing that has helped is getting tees and other casual pieces in better fabrics, like silk. I hand wash my silk and hang to dry. By shopping sales I probably pay less for these pieces than I would regular price for a cotton tee. Sporty Lux can give you ideas. It isn't what everyone else is wearing but closer than office wear. Again it doesn't have to be expensive. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510497 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 16:47:02 +0000 Suz 1510497@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>We are living parallel lives. I also work from home; prefer soft unstructured clothing (mostly) for my at-home work life, yet feel 300% better and more "myself" in my more structured, dressier ensembles (which I pretty much reserve for going out); live an active lifestyle including daily runs (in temperate weather), skates (in winter), and long walks or gym jaunts (in any weather); and suffer from a crazy long season (in my case, winter) that makes dressing for anything other than function supremely ridiculous.&nbsp;</p> <p>Don't get me started on those seasonally confused bloggers who pair high heels with <b>OPEN</b> winter coats. ARGH!!!!!</p> <p>In other words, I live and breathe your dilemma, and I am sorry to tell you there are no easy answers.&nbsp;</p> <p>But Angie does have a few excellent blog posts that touch on this subject, and as Alaskagirl remarks, we've had some terrific conversations here on the forum that you can find in the archives. In fact, I might have to go look those up myself!</p> <p>I do have a few thoughts, for what they might be worth.&nbsp;</p> <p>Make a list or a spreadsheet of every clothing item in your closet. Or take photos. Whatever is easiest for you. I just listed all the items in my F/W closet in a note.&nbsp;</p> <p>Keep track of every time you wear that item. You may feel silly at first. But by watching (not judging, just watching) your actual wearing habits for a full season, you will have a clearer idea of how many items of that type you can reasonably wear and enjoy.&nbsp;</p> <p>Also, note your "happiness" factor and try to analyze it. If you are feeling unfab in the work from home outfits, <b>is this something you can address in another way than adding more structure/ dressiness?&nbsp;<br /></b><br />For example, I have discovered that my happiness factor is much higher for my spring/ summer wardrobe (both work from home and out of the home) is far, far higher than for my fall/winter wardrobe -- especially the work from home fall/ winter.&nbsp;</p> <p>Why? Well, I narrowed it down to a couple of factors, some of which I can do something about, and some I can't.&nbsp;</p> <ol> <li>I have far more variation in silhouette in spring/ summer. This is because winter means snow and bitter cold and that means a steady diet of skinnies tucked into boots where I live. There's not much I can do about this, but I am looking into some options.&nbsp;</li> <li>I get to wear my real footwear more in spring/ summer. Winter means snowboots. Argh.&nbsp;</li> <li>Related to #1, I can wear a lot more skirts/ dresses in summer. Because my lifestyle is so casual, I have made it a point to buy some casual skirts/ dresses and they get a ton of wear. They are "easy" enough for home wear but they give me the dressiness I crave. It's harder for me in winter due to extreme temperatures.&nbsp;</li> <li>I like the spring/ summer colours more...they work better with my lighter personal colouring. They give me a happy lift. It is harder for me to wear these colours in winter (for practical reasons -- slush).&nbsp;</li> </ol> <p>These are just a few of the observations I've made.&nbsp; </p> <p>Anyway, the point is, I've learned there is some seasonal variation to my feeling of fabness (or lack thereof).&nbsp;</p> <p>Some ways I add a bit more structure and dressiness to my at-home ensembles include:&nbsp;</p> <ul> <li>Wearing nicer footwear in the house. We are a no-shoes house so this poses a problem (ha!) but I actually plan to buy some house dedicated shoes next winter instead of only slippers.&nbsp;</li> </ul> <ul> <li>Wearing a cuff, earrings, a belt (if wearing jeans, etc.) or other jewellery.&nbsp;</li> </ul> <ul> <li>Scarves in winter as a third piece, even in the house.&nbsp;</li> </ul> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-do-you-do-when-your-sense-of-style-is-at-odds-with-your-real-lifestyle#post-1510496 Wed, 24 Jun 2015 16:45:27 +0000 unfrumped 1510496@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think this is a great post and can understand where you're coming from.<br />I don't&nbsp; have quite the same issue but have a work schedule in which whole months can go by without having an opportunity to "go out". If items are too seasonal or holiday-specific, I might even miss the window for wear for that item for a year!<br />In addition, I've been trying to upgrade casual wear so that it is perfectly comfortable <u>and</u> has some degree of style.<br />Tall orders, for sure.</p> <p>My quick answer is, find a middle ground. <br />First I might need to understand whether you're saying you have a lot of clothes you do want to keep (you love them, they fit great, in style, etc), so should you risk "ruining" them. The answer usually is yes or kinda yes, if they <u>work</u> for the occasion. An example might be a sweater that is fully comfortable but is upscale for dog-walking--maybe it's cashmere--, but if you don't wear it it'll just deteriorate, not be used, get moths, not fit one day. So it's not doing you any good, if you have an abundance of these items, to save all of them for special occasions. Sure, you don't want to feel as though you just "ruined" things willy-nilly, but good use and normal wear and tear are part of life.<br />Another question is, do you love everything ( dressy items) equally, all 10's, or could you identify your <u>very best </u>special items/outfits and pare them down, so that percentage wise, you have less "special" items, &nbsp;but then fewer items reproaching you for not wearing enough, and yet you have enough to be well-dressed and happy for the occasions you do have.<br />Next is actually coming back in contrast to the "first" question--do you have a wardrobe hole for better casual items (interesting, stylish, great performance fabrics or brands that really cater to function + form), not met by your current wardrobe,&nbsp; and&nbsp;your&nbsp;dressy items just don't fit the bill. ( For example, I love pencil skirts but they would&nbsp; not be what I would&nbsp; &nbsp;wear&nbsp; &nbsp;around the house). If I had a dog AND I wanted to dress up more, I might wear washable knit blazer, or an interesting bomber jacket, &nbsp;instead of a sweatshirt or athletic jacket, while going to the park. Then you would make a list and budget and work toward replacing and upgrading.</p> <p>Sorry if this is somewhat meandering, but hope it helps. </p>