https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 02 May 2026 16:43:08 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-739634 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 02:35:50 +0000 Angie 739634@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>The venue looks stunning!!! So is the tent still an option? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-738906 Thu, 04 Oct 2012 13:50:21 +0000 Diana 738906@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Well, the tent can house the bar. And that's the important part. =P Actually, we can have a dance floor in it, we just have to rent the portable one. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-738717 Thu, 04 Oct 2012 05:28:33 +0000 rae 738717@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, wow, the tent can't even house the dance floor? Yeah, that does put a damper on things if it is damp outside. </p> <p>Pretty umbrellas for everyone? ;)</p> <p>Definitely, definitely preferable to spiders and drunk people falling off of the cliff. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-738685 Thu, 04 Oct 2012 04:17:47 +0000 Diana 738685@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Rae, I don't think the tent is ugly or anything. It's just the standard white tent and you can always decorate it. The problem is actually that, because of the trees, they can't tent in the actual walnut grove or over the reception site with the built in dance floor and stage area. They have to set up the tent in the adjoining field next to the parking area (although they do set up something to hide the cars!).</p> <p>I love that you had your wedding on a cliff! I wish I could do that, but 150 guests is kind of a lot for an unreserved location. Not to mention all the elderly relatives and/or drunk friends we might have... seriously, we looked at another venue which was a ridiculous fantasy garden setting (waaaay too Disney) and I had visions of people getting lost in the jungley shrubbery, falling in the pond, or getting eaten by giant spiders (for reals! We got a nighttime tour and the site manager said that she didn't like to go down a specific path at night because of the huge spiders. And then we SAW one. Actually, it was kind of cool, but not the kind of guest I'd want at my wedding!). </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-738638 Thu, 04 Oct 2012 03:09:04 +0000 rae 738638@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>The venue looks really beautiful, Diana! The tent option doesn't sound so bad - is the tent they provide ugly? Maybe you could rent a prettier tent? </p> <p>I know how you feel when you say you are shell-shocked - I was so shell-shocked in fact that I said to heck with it all! We had our wedding out on a cliff with no reservations or anything. The outdoor thing was amazing IMO and really let the dresses and bouquet pop in our pictures. I would totally do it that way again. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-738547 Thu, 04 Oct 2012 01:21:28 +0000 Diana 738547@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I added some photos of the venue up top. They were setting up a wedding on Saturday and allowed us to come back and see how it looked with the tables, chairs, decorations, etc. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-736038 Mon, 01 Oct 2012 17:29:10 +0000 MsMary 736038@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>BTW, the tent option is good for unseasonable heat as well as rain. Some years ago I went to a lovely garden wedding in So Cal in early March that was ruined by unseasonable 95+ degree weather! Nobody could sit in the seats provided because it was too danged hot and there was no shade -- everybody huddles under the overhang on the side of the builsing to watch the ceremony!</p> <p>It's great that you will have them available and can pull the trigger at the last minute if need be! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-736032 Mon, 01 Oct 2012 17:25:22 +0000 catgirl 736032@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I have to run but just have to tell Ramya that my husband came to a family wedding in India, and when I jokingly told him he was now related to the 800 people there, he about keeled over. </p> <p>Diana, will come back to post but I think you need to hire MaryK and delegate the order-barking to her! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-735950 Mon, 01 Oct 2012 16:26:17 +0000 Diana 735950@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am back in Boston now (and typing on a real keyboard as opposed to my ipad, yay) and wanted to respond in more detail to everyone who has weighed in here. First off, thank you! All of your insights are really helpful and you are all definitely helping with the "OMG everything is so overwhelming" feeling! I think I need the reminder that people get married and plan weddings all the time, and I am not alone! Everyone's weddings sound like they were amazing!</p> <p>Re: the tent. We do not apparently have to make a final decision until around a week before the date. They are not allowed to have permanent structures anyway, so it goes up the night before in any case (at most they leave it up for three weddings on fri/sat/sun). Having the last minute decision is nice because the tent is $$$$. They told us that they only tented once all this season, and it was in early april and unseasonably cold (but no rain). There are also heaters available for the cold issue; again, we don't have to decide until the week before. </p> <p>Mary, good point about being able to bark orders! Although I think I definitely have trouble delegating, like Angie. I guess with the coordinator I am going to wait and see how much it costs and think about it some more. It's a little confusing b/c the site manager is also a day-of coordinator and apparently you can hire her for an additional fee to do standard day-of stuff, but she is also already around (or someone on her staff) to set up etc ahead of time. So I need to figure out the exact breakdown of tasks and see what is missing. </p> <p>Sylvie, good idea to have parasols! I've always enjoyed having them at weddings I have attended (they're fun and good photo props in addition to providing shade). I've been told that in may there is more sun than now at the ceremony area (because the leaves are less full on the trees) but the temperatures are also cooler. </p> <p>Ramya, wow, 1000 people?!?! I don't even think I know that many people! That must have been completely crazy to plan. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-735765 Mon, 01 Oct 2012 10:33:32 +0000 ramya 735765@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ok Indian here and we had a big fat Indian wedding with 1000 people...<br /> And my company decided to relieve me 2 weeks before my wedding and I flew home...</p> <p>So my involvement in my own wedding was barking orders(I so get you Mary K) politely at my Dad and not so politely at my mom!!! (Sorry Mom)... Well Dad finally got fed up and said he would take care of lunch( we have a big food affair back in India ) and promptly hired his friend who owns a catering company... Flowers and stage decoration I was very involved... Bridal shower is held the day before wedding in same venue... And moved only after dad assured yes the flowers were right and yes the people knew what they were doing :)</p> <p>So I am so for atleast a catering co-ordinator... Its a nightmare over there </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-735722 Mon, 01 Oct 2012 07:53:36 +0000 Sylvie 735722@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>If I had to do it again I would not go for an outdoor wedding. It poured during the entire wedding ceremony and we had to keep going through the rain. Atmospheric yes, but probably not very pleasant for our guests. It was in June, but it was also in the northeastern part of the US.</p> <p>However, I think you'll be fine in southern CA. If anything, you might want to provide parasols for your guests - we found them pretty handy at a northern CA wedding we attended.</p> <p>If the site provides a day-of coordinator, you don't need to hire your own. But if they are only handling food and won't be (for example) calling guests into dinner, telling them it's time to sit down, cueing people involved in the wedding when it's time to start, you may very well need a coordinator. It also depends on how formal you want your wedding to be - if you're ok with things being more "natural" and the flow being a little less seamless, there's no need for one. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-735239 Sun, 30 Sep 2012 15:51:06 +0000 Janet 735239@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, and a friend made our gorgeous cake, and friends also provided music. I designed, printed, and hand assembled the invitations and favors (bookmarks which I understand some of our friends still use and treasure, and a most appropriate favor since hubs and I met in a bookstore!). I saved money on photography by hiring the assistant of a great local wedding photographer who was one of my clients and friends, and she simply turned the film over to me after the wedding so I could do my own editing and processing, since I was very comfortable with that. I designed my dress with the help of a local dressmaker/costume designer, but it wasn't cheap. Our main expenses were catering a sit-down dinner and the open bar, but that was fine with us because we wanted our guests to have the best experience possible. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-735234 Sun, 30 Sep 2012 15:45:59 +0000 Janet 735234@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>We had our wedding in our backyard garden, and I would totally do it that way again! We had worked hard on the garden, planted lots of beautiful plants and trees (I built long stone retaining walls and everything), and invested a lot in it, so it felt natural to have the wedding there. We lived in a tiny beach house at the time, across the street from the Chesapeake Bay, so it was convenient to a nice spot for photographs with the water in the background.</p> <p>I insisted on a tent, even though my husband didn't want one. You don't mess with June weather in Maryland. It had rained every single weekend that spring, right through to the weekend of the wedding. Sure enough, the day started fine, warm and partly cloudy, all during the ceremony and pictures, when we had a little cocktail time for guests in the community clubhouse (three doors down from our house, while our backyard seating was being transformed from ceremony to dining format). </p> <p>But as we were walking back towards our house for the reception, the first drops of rain started, and the moment we were under the tent in the back yard, the sky absolutely exploded. Buckets and buckets of rain! It poured off the sides of the tent and we all looked at each other in amazement. Ten minutes later, the sun came back out. So yes, my recommendation is for a tent. My philosophy on them is the same as umbrellas -- whenever I have one and don't need it, I never regret having it, but it would not be true when the situation is reversed.</p> <p>I am also quite the control freak, and for that very reason, we elected to have a wedding coordinator. That may sound counterintuitive, but it was mainly because we were having the wedding where we lived. I was already painting the front porch two nights before the wedding! The coordinator saved me from myself. She insisted we book rooms for ourselves and our families at a nearby hotel for the night before the wedding, which was brilliant. I got a great night's rest the night before, and all the last-minute arrangements were out of my sight. She did an awesome job, and she was easily worth 4x what we paid her! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-733775 Fri, 28 Sep 2012 17:21:34 +0000 MsMary 733775@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>If you have a catering coordinator you may not need anybody else. We had our wedding at home so our coordinator did everything for the ceremony AND the reception.</p> <p>And yes, spend money on the things YOU care about and cut corners on the rest! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-733742 Fri, 28 Sep 2012 16:46:22 +0000 Angie 733742@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Mary barking orders. I just spat out my tea. Ohhhhhhhhhhhh! How I love a good laugh :)</p> <p>There you go, Diana. I am the worst delegator in the world. I can't even delegate someone to make a cuppa. Soooooo, if you can delegate, a co-ordinator might be worth the cost. </p> <p>Yes, weddings can be extremely expensive. I have been to extremely extravagant weddings, as well as very modest ones. They were both AS stunning. I will also add that our wedding was not expensive - it was organized in less them three months and we cut costs where we could. It really helped that my Mum was the Chair Lady of the flower club in Cape Town at the time so all the flowers were bought wholesale and the labour was free. I designed my own dress with a seamstress which also cut costs. Now, I believe it's cheaper to purchase a dress online - this was not the case 16 years ago. </p> <p>I stayed away from all party favours and we didn't have a registry of gifts either. But, we had the BEST food and venue - because we are foodies and that was important to us. </p> <p>Just saying that you can cut costs if you want to. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-733725 Fri, 28 Sep 2012 16:31:13 +0000 Diana 733725@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks, ladies. I knew I'd get lots of helpful advice here. =)</p> <p>Re the wedding coordinator, the main impediment is cost. I think at the moment I am a little shell shocked at how much things cost (and how many things seem to be not worth it) that I am having a hard time judging relative worth objectively! To be honest I'm not actually sure what a day of coordinator does beyond organizing the rehearsal and ceremony. There will already be a catering coordinator, and since the catering company does most of the rentals (like tent, addl furniture, etc) they would be in charge of that. There will be around 150 guests but the wedding party itself is just us, our parents, and our siblings (2 each) so should hopefully be not too complicated.</p> <p>But I suspect there are a million small things to deal with.... I would be ok with doing stuff before the date but not sure I could handle all the stuff on the wedding date itself.... Will have to consider further. Not sure I want to make any friends do it if it's a big job - one reason I only have my sisters as bridesmaids is that I think nobody really enjoys being one and friends would have more fun as guests. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-733699 Fri, 28 Sep 2012 16:01:46 +0000 MsMary 733699@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am a gigantic control freak and the thing I loved the best about having a day-of coordinator was that I could just bark orders at her without worrying about whether she would take it the wrong way and get her feelings hurt. If I'd been relying on family or friends I'd have felt like I had to be a lot more diplomatic and that would have stressed me out. LOL</p> <p>That's probably just me, though. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-733688 Fri, 28 Sep 2012 15:52:44 +0000 marianna 733688@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Looks lovely! So excited for you!</p> <p>I think a wedding planner depends on how many guests you have. I did everything myself (although my wedding was tiny) and I liked the control it gave me. Also saved money that way. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-733629 Fri, 28 Sep 2012 14:44:42 +0000 Angie 733629@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Well. Rain on your wedding day is good luck! I hope it rains on the day, but NOT during your actual wedding or reception, of course :)</p> <p>The venue looks gorgeous, Diana!! Getting married under a walnut tree sounds blissfully perfect :)</p> <p>I'm with Mary. MUST have the option of tents too - just in case. Although we were married in the oldest Church in Cape Town and our reception was by the sea - all covered. It rained on the day too! But not for the wedding or photos.</p> <p>I can't comment on the co-ordinator bit. We had 100 people at our wedding and I organized the entire thing because I am a control freak. My Mum and Dad were gems at helping though. My Mum did all the flowers in both venues, and sorted out the wedding cake. My Dad was very supportive. Greg was away, and supportive from a distance. He just let me do my thing - which really helped :)</p> <p>It's up to you. Mary loved her co-ordinator. Maybe go with that? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-733569 Fri, 28 Sep 2012 13:13:10 +0000 MsMary 733569@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>We got married in May in So Cal in our own back yard and it rained the morning of the wedding! We were VERY glad we had put up tents! If there is a tent option I would go for it!</p> <p>I also vote yes on the day-of coordinator. Our wedding was pretty small (90 guests) but I was still very glad of the coordinator so family and friends could just enjoy the day. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-733552 Fri, 28 Sep 2012 12:42:53 +0000 missvee 733552@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It looks like a lovely venue, and if as you say the chance of rain is small, then I'd say go ahead. As to your other question abou hiring a coordinator I guess it depends on how big the wedding will be, how complicated, how capable your sisters are etc. I wouldn't give the job to your mom - let her enjoy the day without fussing over the arrangements. Millions of weddings have gone ahead just fine without the services of a "wedding coordinator" so don't feel that you need to hire somebody if you don't want the expense. Weddings can get way out of hand with lots of extras that nobody needs or wants. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/wedding-planning-part-1-venue-selection-and-random-questions#post-733457 Fri, 28 Sep 2012 07:53:05 +0000 Diana 733457@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>We have spent the last few days looking at potential wedding venues. I now know more about all sorts of outdoor lighting options than anyone needs to know. Twinkle lights, anyone? Anyway, this one is currently the front runner, based on price, availability, ambiance, and convenience (both for ease of planning and for ease of guests getting there).</p> <p><a href="http://www.walnutgroveweddings.com/" rel="nofollow">http://www.walnutgroveweddings.com/</a></p> <p>What do you think? Any thoughts, ideas, etc? The venue is basically a big open space with grass and walnut trees, surrounded by fields. We wanted an outdoor ceremony which this place is perfect for - it will be under the walnut trees. Their reception space is also outdoors, with a lovely built in stone dance floor and stage area with fireplace. Plus twinkle lights and market lights, naturally. =P The only thing I was a bit concerned about was that they have no indoor options in case of rain (they can erect a tent but it would not be as nice). There is literally nothing inddors but the brides room and bathrooms. On the other hand, they had a May date available, and the chance of rain is pretty tiny in SoCal at that time. </p> <p>There was a second venue that we really liked, but it was in the middle of nowhere, plus we would have to handle a lot more rentals, vendors, etc by ourselves.</p> <p>For those of you who had completely outdoor weddings, would you do it again? </p> <p>Also, would it be a good idea to hire a day-of wedding coordinator or is this something I (or my mom or sisters or a friend) could do?</p> <p>ETA: some photos of the venue. They were setting up a wedding on Saturday and allowed us to come back and see how it looked with the tables, chairs, decorations, etc. This wedding was pretty minimalist/rustic with the decorations. </p>