https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 18 Apr 2026 16:03:23 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852800 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 23:27:08 +0000 Janet 852800@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>That all makes total sense, Tanya. I can't say I blame you at all, and I'm glad you're doing better and are back here on YLF these days!</p> <p>Something Mo said sparked a memory for me. My sister teased me mercilessly when I was little (she's 10 years older than me). Two things she called me all the time were Elephant Ears and Droopy Drawers. To this day, I really don't care to show my ears, and, well, maybe this explains why I'm so worried about a droopy behind! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852775 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 23:02:15 +0000 MsMaven 852775@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I can relate to the negative feelings about oversized clothes. Like you, I was tall and skinny growing up and I often wore clothes big "to grow into," or else hand me downs from my sister and aunts. I don't care how many wonderful clothes can be found on Ebay or in thrift shops, I absolutely will not wear already-worn clothes.</p> <p>I have photo albums full of full or oversized pants from earlier decades and I didn't ever have a pair I felt I looked good in. I was happy to see them go. I won't be repeating that look again. Very few women look good in pleated front pants. </p> <p>I do believe that nothing helps to heal a broken heart like a little shopping therapy. Good luck to you. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852736 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 22:29:03 +0000 nancylee 852736@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Tanya, first of all I'm so sorry about your breakup. I'm hoping things are looking up for you as we start this new year. We are happy to have you back here on YLF. :)</p> <p>Your analysis of why you don't feel comfortable in baggy pants makes complete sense. It really shows a depth of courage and intelligence for you to be able to understand such a complex emotional reaction, and I applaud you for trying to understand it for yourself...and also for sharing it with us. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852730 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 22:23:43 +0000 Sveta 852730@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Tanya, our emotions play a huge role in how we feel in our clothes. You look superb in skinnies and regular jeans and trousers so there is not need to for for the trend which makes you unhappy. I hope there are a lot of other trends out there which are on the happier side for you!<br /> Actually this is the reason I cannot see myself in Converse sneakers: too many associations with the keds from my school gym uniform. I hated gym when I was a child, feeling awkwardly tall and fat so Cons bring back those unhappy memories from my childhood.<br /> Sending you a lot of hugs, life is bound to get better very soon! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852696 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 21:40:59 +0000 Caro in Oz 852696@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sorry you are having such a hard time. I think it's great that you've understood where your feelings come from. Please only wear what makes you feel good. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852664 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 20:45:08 +0000 rachylou 852664@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It is absolutely upsetting when your pants are falling off. That can have me in tears.</p> <p>Anyways, proper pants will always be proper pants - neither baggy nor skinny. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852655 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 20:35:50 +0000 RoseandJoan 852655@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Perhaps this trend has rolled around too quickly Tanya given how recent this emotionally turbulent time has been? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852610 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 19:46:11 +0000 CocoLion 852610@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sorry to hear about the break-ups. I can relate, although weight loss hasn't been a part of relationship heartache. I tend to drift into self-destructive behaviors when I am heartbroken or depressed. I do have certain pieces of clothing that bring very bad memories yet was unable to edit them out of my closet. Why is that? It's like I enjoy having a token of pain and failure. And that's what baggy pants fell like to you -- a token of pain. It's a sign that you are emotionally fit, that you don't torture yourself by wearing things that bring up painful feelings.</p> <p>I will say that there are some looser trousers that still have good fit. This is why I (generally) don't size up to achieve a baggy look. I buy things that were intended to be oversized; there is a difference in fit. Plus, I will size down one size to get a more tailored oversized fit.</p> <p>You shouldn't feel you have to jump on any style bandwagon. In fact, you will appreciate, in later years, the good judgement you had to avoid certain styles. Things that are the epitome of cool have a way of looking ridiculous about 7 years later. Sometimes in just 2 years! I truly admire this about people with a more classic style but just can't seem to do it myself. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852573 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 19:13:40 +0000 Sara L. 852573@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Your explanation makes perfect sense for why you don't like slouchy pants. There are so many trends out there that there's no reason you have to try this one. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852565 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 19:02:28 +0000 Mo 852565@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I was going to add that I had no negative associations, but merely prefer a slimmer fit like you. But then I remembered being teased on my softball team for my pants being big on me. They called me 'Droopy' as in the cartoon dog character. I'm not scarred or anything, but I can say I've worn pants that fit closely pretty much ever since!<br /> Wear what makes you feel fab. For me, that is a hint at looseness in a BF jean, not baggy. A nod to the trend that still feels right on me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852558 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 18:52:01 +0000 Suz 852558@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Tanya, this is a really helpful analysis and it is brave and kind of you to post it because I am sure that if others look at their own very strong reactions to various styles they might find something similar in their histories! I am glad you are starting to feel better now, and I believe we should NEVER wear clothes with a low happiness factor -- no matter how good they look! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852542 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 18:29:35 +0000 Anonymous 852542@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This is not silly, at all. I did have a similar childhood experience, with not geing able to fill my clothes. I used to layer leggings under denim, to try to fill them in. I was slighly underweight until I hit 32 or so, when I gained some weight due to my sedentary job, then went to overweight territory as I quit smoking. I guess I am surrounded by people, who think I can take any comment - which is true for the most part- 'cause lord, did I get comments!!!! I then lost about 25 pounds in about 8 weeks, due to anxiety attacks, that just like in your case, rendered me unable to eat anything at all. </p> <p>I think I was the most unhappy when people called me thin, after the anxiety issue, in spite of it bringing me back to a very healthy weight range, because it reared the freakisly skinny issue of my chilhood. Go friggin figure. </p> <p>I put back about 10 pounds out of the 25, I think I could be happier without 4 or so but oy vey! </p> <p>I was also "abnormally" tall for my race, to the point that I never met any women taller than me, until I moved to the US. I wore flat shoes for years, despite my love for heels, because I had this freakisly tall concept in my head</p> <p>Jeez, I think I went all over the place and ended up with very little on the way of a constructive comment. I guess I wanted to say that you are not alone and it is not silly. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852528 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 18:18:41 +0000 unfrumped 852528@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Tanya, I wish you all good things and better times ahead.. your post is so genuine,<br /> and I'm sureit will help others. The whole funny thing about fashion is that this style will have its data and its fading time, too. You shortsighted out very specific reasons fo your " poison eye" here but I think it's so.liberating for all to realize that sometimes a style or item that seems perfect for us just doesn't feel.right, for whatever reason. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852521 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 18:12:11 +0000 Thistle 852521@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This makes perfect sense. Waaay too many negative emotions attached to the style, and so very low happiness factor.</p> <p>Clothes should make you happy!</p> <p>So, sit out this trend and enjoy the other parts. Tailored is always in style, and you look fab in it! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852519 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 18:09:09 +0000 Diana 852519@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This makes perfect sense, Tanya. After all, it's you who has to wear your clothes so if you are not happy/have bad associations with a particular style, then you should not wear them!</p> <p>I think we all have some types of psychological poison eyes, whether we know them or not. Mine is strong centered front seams, especially ruched, down the chest, because they look like my dad's scar from open heart surgery. I can't look at tops like that without cringing. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852513 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 17:56:51 +0000 Tanya 852513@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you very much for your kind words and support ladies! I am doing fairly well, there is still a bit of weight left to gain back, but I am letting it happen on its own.</p> <p>The reason I am struggling with this is that I actually like these pants and they do not look that bad on me either. It is just that I feel horrible in them, as it brings all the bad associations. I am really enjoying all the slouchy/BF looks here on YLF and really want to join in the fun! But then I try some on and immediately realize it is not a good idea for me. The slouchy look also seems to be not just a trend, but a major direction bottoms are in and without it it seems I am left with my usual skinnies and some flares, which I love but I am also craving something new. So I keep going in circles...</p> <p>Edit: just saw Angie's post, we must have been typing at the same time.<br /> I much appreciate your kind and wise word Angie! Sorry you are not feeling well, hope you get better soon! I will listen to your advice and focus on finding the right pair of slim BF jeans. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852510 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 17:51:03 +0000 Angie 852510@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>(I'm under the weather and off the forum until I feel better, but I had to chime in here). </p> <p>Tanya, this makes sense by a billion percent. It's VERY liberating that you understand your negative feelings towards a style. You are in touch with your emotions and this is commendable. Well done! Now *no* slouchies for you!!! </p> <p>Of course, you can appreciate the look on others because you are just that type of person. And being such a trendy denim girl yourself, a pair of slim cut BF jeans will satisfy all emotions and style sensibilities. </p> <p>You are EXTREMELY FAB. Can't adequately express how happy I am that you are back on the forum. Your energy is a delight. </p> <p>HUGS!! xoxo </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852456 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 17:03:56 +0000 cheryle (Dianthus) 852456@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am sorry to hear that you have been through two relationships that caused you physical pain in addition to the emotional trauma.</p> <p>One of the messages I have read many times on YLF is that not all trends are for all people and we need to understand and accept that we can pick and choose the ones we want to adopt that fit into our personal style.</p> <p>You look great in everything you wear so relish it and don't give the loose trend another thought. Enjoy it on others if you can just as you would a color you like to look at but not wear. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852455 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 17:02:40 +0000 Mellllls 852455@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>i think it's great that you recognize what causes your poison eye. but there are so many trends out there that there is no reason to adopt each and every one, so if you pass on this one because of your association with loose pants, there is nothing wrong with that. happiness is most important </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852454 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 17:01:20 +0000 Tina.b 852454@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Tanya, first I'm so sorry that you've been going through a difficult time lately. You do sound like you have such a positive attitude, and that will help you tremendously. </p> <p>I think we all carry some baggage and body issues that influence what we choose fashionwise either consciously or subconsciously. I think that there are so many stylish options out there today, that it is just fine to pass many trends right by, regardless of how flattering they may be. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852451 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 16:58:23 +0000 JennyK (NC) 852451@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I really feel for you. And it's ok not to like all trends or to feel uncomfortable with them. I have extreme negative reactions to certain looks too, and the strength of the emotional response has to do with associations those looks have for me. It is tougher though, when these looks seem to be all over the place with a "wow! This is it! This is the new look! Adopt! Adopt!" Most of that is purely in my head. Still, it's there. </p> <p>So I get it. I do. </p> <p>What if you get some BF jeans, wear them around the house for a day and see how they make you feel? If it doesn't feel good, return them. Clothing should *always* make you feel good about yourself. :-)</p> <p>Jenny </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852449 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 16:56:47 +0000 Kim 852449@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>And so we get a poison eye for a particular style. Nothing to worry about there, there's so many other things to wear! LOL</p> <p>Sorry about your losses, but glad to hear that you are mending (and learning a lot about yourself in the process.) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/very-low-happiness-factor-with-slouchybaggy-pants---analysis-long#post-852442 Mon, 18 Feb 2013 16:48:38 +0000 Tanya 852442@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>As I have mentioned on the Angie's blog today, which was very timely, I have spent a lot of time recently trying to figure out why I have such a strong negative reaction to these types of pants ( on myself, not on others) and came to all sorts of conclusions. After all, I tend to be an early trend adapter, and am relatively slim/tall, yet every time I would try one of these pants I couldn't take them of fast enough as I would feel absolutely miserable in them. It finally downed on me that the happiness factor is very low due to a couple of non-fashion issue related to my past (feel free to stop reading here, as this becomes more of psychological self analysis than anything else). </p> <p>My while life I have been fairly skinny, especially as a child. My mom (like many moms) would always buy my clothes too big as "I would grow into them", but a lot of times it never happened and I really hated going to school in very over sized clothes - it made me feel quite unhappy.</p> <p>The main reason, though, has to do with my grown-up life. Since I was 15, for 20 years, my height and weight have been pretty much the same, +/- 2 lb at most. I also prefer more fitted fits of clothes, particularly bottoms in general (interestingly, I have no issues with anything over sized on the top - will happily wear that). A couple of years ago I went through a really painful break up of a 6-year long relationship and ended up loosing a lot of weight ( I believe I was down to ~ 92 lb from mu usual 110 lb on a 5'6" frame) as I literally couldn't eat anything. I looked and felt horrible. All my pants were literally falling of me and people commented on it ( well my friends used it as a reason to try and make me eat more as they were quite worried). Even when I recovered a little and tried to but something that fit properly 00s were often too big. Eventually, I recovered and gained the weight back, but it took more than a year. </p> <p>Then this in the summer of last year another break-up happened ( though less devastating, but still bad) and the whole weight loss thing happened again as well ( this was the first in the series of various bad things that made made go of YLF for a while). And again the whole baggy pant thing. I am still in the recovery phase this time around, but things are much better. </p> <p>So, as silly as this might sound, my brain has forged a strong connection between very baggy pants and feeling miserable. While, rationally, I am quite aware that it is not the pants that made me unhappy, I just can not seem to shake those feelings away. Every time I try I end up feeling very unhappy. Not to mention that I still get the comments : "you loosing weight again/not eating/ not over him yet". </p> <p>I can handle things a bit baggy and relaxed - right now I am still not quite back to my usual weight and a lot of my bottoms are a size or two too big. That I can deal with in moderation - especially with the new tucked-in in belted look. I like some looser fits in thin materials for hot weather. But I do not think I can do the purposefully very baggy/slouchy looks from Angie's post, even though I would like to. I am still trying to decide if it makes sense for me to get a pair of fairly streamlined BF jeans as I really like them on others.</p> <p>Thank you for reading if you made it this far! </p>