https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Wed, 08 Apr 2026 15:32:49 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318735 Tue, 18 Apr 2023 14:35:31 +0000 rachylou 2318735@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Well done!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318712 Tue, 18 Apr 2023 12:27:46 +0000 jussie 2318712@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am a bit of a settler, and yes sometimes I regret it…<br /> Good to stay strong, if you don’t have a wardrobe hole you need to fill. If you have a hole then that’s different.<br /> This dress just doesn’t look like anything special to be honest. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318622 Mon, 17 Apr 2023 21:32:01 +0000 Sal 2318622@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I have settled twice recently and regretted it.</p> <p>Both with sweaters - purchased online, that really are too big.&nbsp; I am truly between sized and I tend online to err for the larger size which is a mistake.&nbsp; In store I try both on and its 50/50.</p> <p>The black is shapeless and only gear - not the versatile black merino I thought would work with trousers and skirts.&nbsp;The navy is also a bit too large and wide.</p> <p>Other people can wear oversized knits and look awesome, but they often just look and feel sloppy on me.</p> <p>Good job for not settling - I need to be a bit more critical, </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318477 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 20:58:35 +0000 Tanya 2318477@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What Suz said.&nbsp; It is hard not settle, but also rewarding in the long run.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318447 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 18:36:57 +0000 unfrumped 2318447@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>kkards, exactly. Sometimes you only know more surely you did the right thing after you’ve completely done it. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318432 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 17:17:45 +0000 kkards 2318432@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>The do not settle muscle can be one of the hardest to flex, but it feels so good when you do. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318412 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 14:39:32 +0000 Carla 2318412@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>LOL! @&nbsp;<b>CarolS</b>! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318408 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 14:35:06 +0000 Angie 2318408@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Good job, <b>unfrumped</b>!&nbsp;</p> <p>I'm nodding along with <b>Suz</b>.&nbsp;</p> <p>If you aren't desperate for the item - try not to settle.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318406 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 14:20:00 +0000 CarolS 2318406@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It's so hard to walk the line between being selective and holding out for something that's taking too long to appear!</p> <p>I've returned so many things in the name of being picky and then thought, "gee, if I had kept that I would have a better option for X".</p> <p>And why is it SO true that you only find the right thing after you've settled for something else?! Not just with fashion, either...</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318403 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 14:02:22 +0000 Anonymous 2318403@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Applause! You are so smart. &nbsp;The right dress will come along eventually&nbsp;</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318401 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 12:19:00 +0000 Dee 2318401@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I agree to not settling when there's no urgency. </p> <p>If you have to talk yourself in to keeping it or buying something extra to make it work better thats always a red flag for me. And half the time you usually find what you really wanted right after you've succumbed. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318391 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 04:42:59 +0000 Jenni NZ 2318391@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Your last point is why I actually take my clothing lists with me to planned shopping trips in B&amp;M stores. It sounds a bit OCD ( and it is, but then so am I, in a reasonably non-pathological way). It has been so useful though in thinking what the purported new purchase can work with, that I already have.<br /> This year’s 2 purchases both were going to be slam-dunks with existing items, plus I had that feeling of love with both.<br /> I am being extremely fussy and applaud your restraint. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318387 Sun, 16 Apr 2023 03:41:41 +0000 unfrumped 2318387@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Brooklyn, that’s right. </p> <p>When I go shopping in person, I try to make myself wear something that I think looks good to ME— a blazer tgat has my favorite fit, a top in color that is very flattering and fits well, or something. Ideally the whole outfit would look “ sharp “ as much as will still be practical for the dressing room. But things that help “ set the bar”.</p> <p>At home it’s even easier, though can take time, to compare. Even finding out, gee, I had no reason to get this because already had ___. Feels foolish, but good to realize in time. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318369 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 23:21:10 +0000 Brooklyn 2318369@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes, to what Rejoiceandbe said. I find in this situation it can be helpful after trying on the “not sure” item in question to try on something that you already own and that you love and feel confident in. In many situations (for me) that makes the decision easy. I think “I want that feeling when I put it on”. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318363 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 22:03:15 +0000 Rejoiceandbe 2318363@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I find that if you don't love it when you first try something on, you never feel good in it later. Go with your instinct! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318361 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 21:23:39 +0000 unfrumped 2318361@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Janet, yes. I enjoyed that post! </p> <p>It coukd get too imaginary I suppose, as there are some aspects of “ growing older and better” that have created some, ahem, challenges to feeling really good in an outfit. Or it doesn’t happen with such a high percentage of items, the way youngsters can look fab in a per sack!</p> <p>So I’m going for that a balance between being unrealistic— which occurs at any age really, if we expect clothing to do something it was never meant to do, vs buying the wrong things unnecessarily, due to impatience, expanding the wardrobe without using a high enough bar. </p> <p>It’s kinda the same old “less but better” , but for me it’s not linked to brands or what some people think of as investment pieces. It’s back to the joy. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318355 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 19:55:39 +0000 Janet 2318355@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It comes back again to that question that I posted recently but applied to closet editing, even though it applies equally well to shopping: “Do I WANT to wear this?” Is this something that makes me wish I had an occasion tomorrow? If not, and you’re not in a pressing need situation, hold off — chances are there is something better out there! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318352 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 19:22:31 +0000 Kate 2318352@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>More congrats on not settling. I've been trying to flex that muscle more recently, and every time I do, I feel a flood of relief. I need clothes that give me joy and are a pleasure to wear, not stuff that I've just settled for and takes up space, and that I may never reach for.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318345 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 17:43:29 +0000 Astrid 2318345@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Congrats on not settling! I agree, there's no reason to make do if it's not an emergency and you have other options. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318344 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 17:42:02 +0000 cat2 2318344@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I have been narrowing down my palette and only adding things in colors I really like; it’s made me much happier with the evolving results. So stay strong, and send the navy back! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318341 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 17:30:16 +0000 Anonymous 2318341@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Big yay to not settling! I'm still learning </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318330 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 16:05:04 +0000 Suz 2318330@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes -- it can be awfully hard not to settle, particularly if you have a strong need for a certain type of item -- but it's always better to send it back. Something better will come along!&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318322 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 15:53:02 +0000 Cardiff girl 2318322@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think it’s so difficult to stay strong on this but you are so right to do so.l think that we are all guilty of this particularly if we have done a lot of recent sending back,it’s almost like we “should” keep something but if you have no urgency to buy and it’s not 100% sent it back.You know that you will find something you love the minute you settle for something you don’t! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318319 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 15:48:18 +0000 unfrumped 2318319@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you Carla! </p> <p>I may have overstated “ not my style” when what I meant is, I really enjoy wearing midi skirts and dresses but they fit into wardrobe in a very particular and more limited way. So, no need to have much inventory or utilitarian or backups. Need the love factor. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318315 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 15:34:44 +0000 Carla 2318315@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Stay strong! &nbsp;I’ve been shopping for a couple of easy summer dresses, and almost capitulated yesterday. &nbsp;When I found myself making excuses for&nbsp;<i>the failure of the dress&nbsp;</i>I gave myself a shake and returned it to the rack. &nbsp;<br /><div><br /></div><div>I feel like I’ve ordered and returned so many things this year, or left items behind…*sigh*</div> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/trying-to-be-more-selective#post-2318307 Sat, 15 Apr 2023 15:08:23 +0000 unfrumped 2318307@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I came across this dress before Angie featured it in her collection. Here is kind of a review / decision process. </p> <p>Navy is not my color, but the style and material looked just right for a casual dress for church and other places and looked like might work with sneakers. </p> <p>I ordered 2 sizes; the bigger one had a longer waist that was good, but was top blousy, smaller one fit quite well overall.<br /> I thought it was a bit long, partly for the color and fabrication but also I think my sneaker combos look better with a shorter midi - below- knee dress/ skirt.<br /> Whereas people who can wear sandals can get a lighter look. But it could be hemmed. ( lot of circumference though). </p> <p>Then, the navy. The neckline is something like a wide crew which helps lighten the look. But it’s still so not-flattering, except for being “ classic”, that I immediately move to mitigation mode. Casual faux pearls, white beads, scarves. </p> <p>I was SO close to packing up just the one size &amp; keeping the other. When I went, why???? It’s close, but just not right. If it were gray, pink/ berry, medium blue, medium teal or even a desirable print then it would be something I’d be happy to grab &amp; go &amp; actually likely to look more casual and sneaker- ish as well. It’s close, but not right. </p> <p>I already have a Boden LS navy dress slightly similar, that I got for a funeral option ( or in happier option, a F/W wedding) but have actually never worn but am keeping for now as it’s slightly dressier, &amp; I would wear dressier shoes . It’s not good for summer though due to the close- fitting LS and bodice. </p> <p>So I have packed up both sizes for return . Perhaps they will issue it in another color someday. Or something else will turn up. </p> <p>I am working on exercising my “ don’t settle “ muscles, especially when there’s no wardrobe emergency ( dresses are not essential to either my style or my lifestyle.) But, for those who like to wear navy, this could be a good option. </p>