YouLookFab Forum » Topic: There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)

YouLookFab Forum » Topic: There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear) https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Wed, 22 Apr 2026 15:50:33 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php minimalist on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784424 Mon, 06 Mar 2017 00:01:56 +0000 minimalist 1784424@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Well, the opera situation leaves me stumped, because I get hung up on respect for the musicians and for other guests. Many times, an evening at the opera or symphony has been my only respite from months-long heavy workload, combined with family obligations (illness, weddings, funerals, and so on), and whatever else was going on. More often than not, I've ended up in exhausted tears because for other guests, generally in the "regular patron" category, it was just a casual time to chat, rattle their jewelry, and perform hygiene routines. This has been the case in several cities, and especially pronounced in pricier seats. Truly, I don't care what they're wearing. The young women with backpacks might not have known to ask coat check whether they could leave the packs there. That sort of thing doesn't bother me. But relative quiet in which to enjoy the performance BY MUSICIANS WHO'VE DEDICATED DECADES OF STUDY AND PRACTICE has apparently become too much to ask. I'm hoping that this rant is fully off-topic for the thread, and not just an example of an area where my own awareness of being an oppressor is non-existent. Anonymous on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784324 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 17:15:09 +0000 Anonymous 1784324@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Wow -- miss a couple of days on the Forum and get woefully behind in my reading.  Applauds Ryce and everyone else ...  Anonymous on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784311 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 16:42:02 +0000 Anonymous 1784311@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Ah, minimalist, you are on point as always! Did you know I was thinking of you and wishing I possessed a fraction of your eloquence when I typed the above? ClaraT, thanks. It IS a stimulating discussion, no? Rachey, I think it's interesting that most 20th century movies about "the future" tended to style all the actors in very sleek, body-conscious clothing not unlike some ot day's fitness wear. i guess the future is now. Gaylene, My immediate thought on reading your anecdote were exactly the same as AndreaH's. A couple of decades ago, someone likely would have declined to attend such a performance if due to a last minute tickets/lost luggage/whatever they didn't have "appropriate" attire. I do think it is a good thing that people don't feel so constrained today and don't allow something so inconsequential as their clothing options to require them to forego an opportunity. I have a suspicion that community norms are part of the difference in your and my opinions on this subject. In my city, when someone, especially if they are young, comes to the opera and for whatever reason gives off the vibe of not being a "regular" patron, they are typically received with a great deal of warmth and enthusiasm. People are inclined to chat them up, ask if they are enjoying the performance, etc. Because, to be honest, out here on the prairie, the majority of folks wouldn't dream of attending an opera even if they were given tickets for free. So we are pretty pumped when someone is open to the experience! And if they are travellers as your young women with backpacks may have been, we hope they'll go home with a positive impression of our local company. I gather your city has less need to grow your audience, based on your comments about the "16-30 group". We can only dream of having more than a handful of attendees in that age group at any performance. Carla on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784304 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 15:58:39 +0000 Carla 1784304@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ What Angie, Joy, Gaylene, and Staysfit said, though when I was in MEC with DS#1, he looked around at the silver headed folks roaming the aisles of gear and announced "Mom! These are your people!" I do the 'gear to gym and back - with a stop to pick up coffee cream' and the 'destination bike trip - with stop at pastry shop and back', but generally I can't get out of my gear fast enough. I'm even struggling with wearing my puffer for other than to and from the gym! If I shower at the gym, I change into street clothes, and these aren't another set of gear. That's just my preference, and my personal feeling that gear is task specific. I'm pretty tolerant of what other folks wear, but sometimes shake my head when there is a lack of decorum. This may be personal, but frankly I I draw the line at flannel PJ's worn outside the home. Andrea H on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784295 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 14:30:35 +0000 Andrea H 1784295@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I dunno. Young women at the opera in yoga pants and flipflops + huge backpacks make me think they're students or travelers who unexpectedly got a chance for cheap or free tickets and didn't have time to go home and change/didn't have dressy clothes with them.  Would I personally want someone to pass up a chance like that because they didn't have the "right" clothes?  No.  But other people will feel differently.  In any case, I feel like that's totally a different thing than April's original example of a woman in yoga pants at the post office. Gaylene on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784174 Sun, 05 Mar 2017 01:38:21 +0000 Gaylene 1784174@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Ryce, as much as I endorse your right--and the right of any woman to wear whatever she wants, from a burka to a bikini--I also think it's impossible to prevent others from thinking their own thoughts about the suitability of what a person has chosen to wear. Maybe the two young women who came to opening night at the opera dressed in Lululemon and flip flops (with rather grubby toes) felt empowered, or maybe they deliberately chose to defy the dress code for such an event, or maybe they just were clueless, but regardless of their motives, their choice of attire did make them look very odd given the rest of the crowd was in formal and semi-formal attire. What was interesting, though, was the snarky looks directed towards that pair were not from the 55+ crowd. It was actually the 16-30 group which seemed most annoyed at their attire--especially when their oversized backpacks swung around and almost knocked over a couple of elderly women as the two galloped up the stairs towards their balcony seats. I'm having a hard time thinking of their outfits as huge step forward for women's rights, but this Edwardian (nodding to Rachylou) is starting to see the funny side, so maybe that's progress of a sort! ClaraT on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784113 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 18:45:24 +0000 ClaraT 1784113@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Ryce, I appreciate your thoughtful comment (which I heartily second) and appreciate this thought-provoking thread. rachylou on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784109 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 18:05:17 +0000 rachylou 1784109@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ That's one way to look at it, Ryce. I personally have become accustomed to gear and like it. To the point where normal trousers on the street look odd to me. I personally wear leggings every day for the bakery. I much prefer them to the saggy traditional chefs' outfit. On the other hand, I was raised Edwardian. I miss formal dining and seven course meals and dressing for dinner. Eating my Lean Cuisine-sized meals, which take longer to cook than eat, lacks a certain something (besides food, lol). It was like a dance, a ritual dedicated to the highest ideals of civility and humanity. The highest ideals take effort, which my leggings simply do not. On the third hand, hehe - speaking of Aliens - one day I'm sure we'll reach T'Pol fashion. Just because. I used to think that was silly, but my mind has been changed. Even if Jolene Blalock hated wearing the costume. <a href="http://www.thegeektwins.com/2014/12/7-surprising-facts-about-star-trek.html?m=1" rel="nofollow">http://www.thegeektwins.com/20.....k.html?m=1</a> minimalist on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784107 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 17:59:48 +0000 minimalist 1784107@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Thank you, Ryce. It's not just you. Monitoring other women's conformity, including "saying nice things" aka compliments (signaling approval), is a powerful method in which most women are socialized to keep each other in our places. Of course, no-one wants their comments "to be interpreted in that manner," but awareness is painful work. Thanks for speaking out. Anonymous on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784095 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 16:28:25 +0000 Anonymous 1784095@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Is it just me? This discussion is making me want to go drop a bunch of money at Lululemon and wear some colorful ultra-fancy workout duds to the fanciest restaurant in town, just to prove the point that......... It is nobody business what another person chooses to wear! In this time when, even in modern progressive countries, laws are being written about what women may and may not wear in public, it makes me extraordinarily uncomfortable when a conversation veers into this territory of having expectations surrounding what other people - but especially women - wear. Even the casual suggestion that the social contract includes the expectation that we be "visually interesting" to others makes me shudder. As every one of us knows, there is a long sordid history of fashion and modes of dress being used to keep women "in their place". So I personally celebrate that we are at a juncture at this moment in our society where women have the option to attire themselves in clothing that allows them to stride through this world freely, easily and completely unencumbered. At least one person here has expressed the opinion that wearing "gear" makes her feel empowered and in a mood to get things done. Exactly what wearing a power suit or perfectly tailored sheath dress (sleeves optional <grin>) does for others. Hooray for any mode of attire that yields this result! And let's be honest, the particular clothing being discussed here is mostly form-fitting and shows off the body. So, whether intentionally or not, any discussion of its suitableness inevitably raises the implication that objections just might be related to body-shaming and/or the notion that women have an obligation to attire themselves "modestly" (as opposed to choosing to do so). And I'm confident that no one is this lovely group wants their comments to be interpreted in that manner! Whether any of us individually care for it esthetically or choose to embrace it for ourselves or not, I would suggest that it is HUGE progress for women that these functional, comfortable and, for some individuals, empowering, choices are readily available. To anyone who's read this far, thanks! And special thanks to April for introducing this topic and allowing me space to share my humble opinion. April on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1784050 Sat, 04 Mar 2017 13:04:56 +0000 April 1784050@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Jeanie, it sounds like you are describing wearing gear for appropriately  gearish purposes rather than living in gear.  (And I love your infectious enthusiasm for dressing for the activity at hand.  I too can relish throwing on a velour tracksuit before rolling up my sleeves in the kitchen.) It's the "throwing off gear and getting dressed up for dinner" step that seems to have fallen away around here, the belief being that if you've spent a fortune on those yoga pants, you're already "dressed up."  I'm saying I disagree. Jeanie on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1783879 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 20:03:23 +0000 Jeanie 1783879@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I love gear!  I feel excited to wear it for the adventure that awaits.  I am so excited that there are so many stylish options.  I think it reflects a lifestyle.  There are days that I am looking at working at home, cleaning the house, afternoon yoga and an evening hike for example.  When I consider the day I am either looking at 4 outfit changes or just putting on my gear and being done with it.  If you want to live an active lifestyle gear jus make it easier and is probably the reason so much nice gear has been created.  I do think stylish gear looks nicer than baggy sweats and that is what I opt for as I like to look somewhat put together.   I am just as excited to throw off the gear and get dressed up for dinner.  As long as I'm having fun with fashion I'm happy.   rachylou on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1783864 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 19:29:30 +0000 rachylou 1783864@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ 'Birding, birding, birding' ... Got it! Don't want to embarrass Lilypup at Peet's! Gaylene on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1783856 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 19:07:33 +0000 Gaylene 1783856@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Still laughing at that video, Anna! I'm not really a fan of gear --and that includes hiking, golfing, riding, skiing, and biking as well as yoga/gym gear--worn outside of its environment. To my eye, it makes the wearer look weirdly clueless about what works for different environments and activities. A golf jacket and pair of yoga pants on a ski trail generally isn't a good idea. Same goes for gym wear at the opera (yes, and on opening night, if you can believe it!), or biking shorts and top on a receptionist in a lawyer's office. That said, today's gear has come a long way from the baggy hiking pants and bulky ski wear we used to wear. Many pieces integrate well with mainstream fashion and can be styled in a way which downplays their gear orientation. And sometimes it's just practical to wear my golf gear to Costco on my way home to pick up a bag of oranges and a jug of laundry detergent instead of making a second trip across town. But I've also discovered that it's those moments when I'll inevitably run into an acquaintance who I'd really prefer to have met when I looked more presentable, so I try to keep that kind of gear-wearing to a minimum. I also keep hearing Angie's voice saying "Wear the heck out of your nice clothes!" so I pull my "good" clothes out for regular wear instead of automatically reaching for my gear. So I guess I'm on the fence. Wearing gear isn't a crime, but it isn't something I'd want to do very often because I think gear rarely looks good outside of its native environment on an adult woman. April on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1783822 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 16:23:13 +0000 April 1783822@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ AG, that video made me laugh harder than anything that wasn't Melissa McCarthy this month.  :) JAileen on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1783821 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 16:13:38 +0000 JAileen 1783821@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I guess we really are a suburb of CA. When I got my haircut last time, I wore my Patagonia raincoat, and my stylist said I looked like my outfit came from REI. I wasn't wearing any exercise clothes, though. Rachy, BTW, they call it "birding". viva on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1783765 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 12:27:34 +0000 viva 1783765@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I'm not usually offended by other people's fashion choices unless they are extremely revealing. Period. For me, I have to say that I never wear gear intentionally out as my day wear. However, I often end up out in the world in my gear because I never go to yoga or barre and then go home. There are always other stops - groceries, post office, Staples, what have you. And I don't do hair or makeup for yoga. I don't feel at all at my best on these outings but I feel spiritually great after yoga so that must count for something. This is just not my favorite style of clothing; it's functional and what I wear really before I get dressed for the day. But not what I wear before I go out. If that makes sense. rachylou on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1783735 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 09:07:17 +0000 rachylou 1783735@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Omg. Slay me now. That's immortal Anna! I went to REI last week, which venture reminded me that my entire neighborhood is 'Dressed by REI'... coffee supplied by Peet's. It's more bird-watchers' gear than Fabletics, which maybe makes the difference. But anyways, I'm on Team LisaP. It's a definite aesthetic and you can be more or less stylish within the continuum. It's also appropriate to the lifestyle everyone leads...hiking down from the hills with the dog to get to Peet's, lol. I mean, most people do put on their lagenlook to attend the latest reinterpretive Shakespeare rendition... Auto-Tune King Lear and stuff. On the other hand, the neon jogging capris do look awful wrong here. Mesh panel leggings don't go with the potholes and sidewalks torn up by tree roots AT ALL. Just too fresh and new looking. Also: We don't have good restaurants anymore, so that doesn't matter. What would you wear to eat a chili relleno filled with mac n' cheese anyways? ETA: I probably wouldn't like my math teacher to wear jogging capris and matching sports bra, but I hate seeing people struggling to walk down the sidewalk in their platform stilettos equally... Anonymous on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/3#post-1783728 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 07:51:31 +0000 Anonymous 1783728@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ One of the things I very much like about this forum is that the community is so accepting and supportive. And that there isn't a generally accepted set of "style rules" here, but a lot of encouragement for each member to explore her (or his) own unique sense of self-expression through wardrobe, with a big dose of emphasis on "dressing for the life you actually have." So many of the people here whose look and outlook I most admire, style themselves in completely different ways. I see that as a good thing, because we all have different bodies, appearances, lifestyles, levels of activity, climates, likes and dislikes. I notice that when someone puts time and care into choosing hair, makeup (if they wear it) and clothing that makes THEM happy and suits THEIR life, they almost inevitably appear happy and attractive to me. Janet on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1783717 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 04:53:16 +0000 Janet 1783717@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ LOL Anna! annagybe on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1783694 Fri, 03 Mar 2017 02:48:55 +0000 annagybe 1783694@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ From two years ago <a href="https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CYRENWT8lz8&t=12" rel="nofollow">https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=.....&t=12</a> Anonymous on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1783591 Thu, 02 Mar 2017 23:38:46 +0000 Anonymous 1783591@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ . April on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1783587 Thu, 02 Mar 2017 23:30:41 +0000 April 1783587@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I salute you, LP -- at least there's no deceit in Adidas track pants.  They are what they are, and they don't cost the moon pretending to be something else. LaPed on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1783480 Thu, 02 Mar 2017 19:02:27 +0000 LaPed 1783480@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ April, I actually totally understand being irked by the perfectly-manicured Lululemon ladies. It's not so much the gear, but the way gear has become yet another form of class/privilege signalling. It's like the new "ladies who lunch" look. Like many have mentioned above, gear seems to be to the 21st century what jeans and t-shirts were to the 20th. April on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1783474 Thu, 02 Mar 2017 18:40:02 +0000 April 1783474@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Ah, so here we have a case of the market not responding to your body type, AH.  A problem, to be sure.  There are definitely many bodies that get ignored by retail -- probably most of them, if we're honest.  Too short, too tall, too plus (or not quite plus enough, I now understand), too large-breasted, and you are simply out of luck.  Or you can buy but will pay through the nose for extra tailoring costs.   Believe me, I am sympathetic to the practicalities of gear.  I taught preschool for 8 years in the 80s and 90s.  The clothing choices in that job were roughly 3: denim (if permitted); dress like a preschooler yourself, e.g., leggings with tunic; or drop-waist dresses with long full  skirts; or gear.   When I landed my first job where I "got to" (had to) dress up every day, I was thrilled.  No doubt these experiences have colored my attitudes. Anonymous on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1783472 Thu, 02 Mar 2017 18:20:18 +0000 Anonymous 1783472@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I'm working on it  And guess what I'm wearing right now?  Adidas track pants.   Andrea H on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1783467 Thu, 02 Mar 2017 18:07:54 +0000 Andrea H 1783467@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I feel better in my workout clothes than in my "regular" clothes not because they're more comfortable, but because they fit better and because they fit better (and are designed more to flatter an athletic body type), they look better.  Take jeans.  Any pair of jeans (skinny, "straight" legged, even many boy- or girlfriend) that fits my waist and hips strangle or catch on my (apparently disproportionately) muscular calves.  For me to wear skinny jeans that fit over my calves, they have to have so much stretch in them, they're basically leggings. At which point? I'd rather just wear leggings.  I mean, I still wear jeans when it's more socially acceptable to do so, but I don't feel as attractive in them. Can I get my Team LisaP shirt now? April on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1783457 Thu, 02 Mar 2017 17:29:39 +0000 April 1783457@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Ok, I'm wading in one more time, even though I feel this has become one of those "Mommy Wars" threads where I am likely to be misunderstood no matter what I say. 1.  I was not criticizing a busy mom.  I was saying that the norms of my new town (where a mom in gear had nonetheless clearly spent a lot of time on her appearance) differed from the norms of my old town (where a mom in gear was overlooking her own appearance because she was so focused on that of her kids.) 2.  I was suggesting that spending a lot of money on a pair of exercise pants does not elevate them to street clothes.  3.  I was also suggesting that a person with time to spend on exquisite makeup and hair has the time to put on something other than yoga pants.  Does anyone bother with exquisite hair or makeup on their way to (or from) exercise class?  Seems unlikely. Janet on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1782998 Wed, 01 Mar 2017 12:56:36 +0000 Janet 1782998@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Ok, I haven't read this whole thread yet (just started), but I am so over the whole idea of criticizing what other women (or men) wear out in public unless it is truly and obviously inappropriate. If someone sees me in the grocery store in my gear (because I often do errands in my gear after running because making a separate trip back home to shower, change and put on makeup adds time to my day I do not care to spare), to be blunt, if they don't like it, they can look away. No, I don't wear makeup and finished hair to work out, so you would even see me bare-faced (probably red-faced), ponytailed, cap-wearing and sweaty. Don't like it? Too bad. My life is busy and sometimes it's just more efficient to stop at Target after my workout. Also, I often wear hiking gear to go out and take photos (because I'm often in rugged environments for that and don't want to ruin my regular clothes). I often go to a casual restaurant afterwards for dinner because I usually photograph until the sun goes down and am then famished and don't feel like going home and cooking. So yes, I go out and eat, by myself, in my hiking gear. Granted, this is more likely a casual sushi place than anything else, but again, if someone wants to judge me for wearing gear to eat alone in a restaurant without knowing anything else about me, so be it. So no, I don't have a problem with it. LaPed on "There's gear and there's gear (and it's all still gear)" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/theres-gear-and-theres-gear/page/2#post-1782993 Wed, 01 Mar 2017 12:04:47 +0000 LaPed 1782993@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Oh, geez, I'd never judge a mom with a bed head kid or a PJ kid. Kids' hair is hard, and then you try a new conditioner and they have a skin reaction, so you go back to no conditioner. And you go through phases where they don't want *any* help. And even professional hair dressers can't make them hold still. And some kids have sensory issues and wont wear trousers, only soft pull-on pants. And sometimes they get sick right before bed or early in the morning and you rush them to the doctor in whatever they're wearing. And sometimes they were wearing a snowsuit with long johns, but then it got too hot for the snowsuit in the afternoon. And sometimes they spill chocolate milk all over themselves and the only extra clothes you have with you are long johns... All of the above has happened to me. Granted, I'm not going out with flawless hair and make-up myself, but still, I never judge parents for that stuff. (Also, no one EVER judges dads for how messy/poorly-dressed the kids are; they're just so impressed Dad managed to make it out the door at all. SUCH a double standard.)