https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56 Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 23 May 2026 02:48:35 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1657806 Tue, 10 May 2016 02:25:26 +0000 Karie 1657806@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh I totally hear you on the aging thing - I do NOT have the body I had 5 yrs. ago (not by a long shot) even though I exercise every day, eat right (OK for the most part) etc., I have this flabby belly that I cannot get rid of. I just turned 56 last week and I am having a bit of a hard time with it - now I'm on the downslope headed towards 60! How did I get here so fast? I have no idea.<br /> I accept the age thing because I cannot change it, and I really am just glad to be here (my mother only lived to be 54). The body thing I have trouble accepting because I suppose I could change it, but the older I get the harder that is to do. </p> <p>And kudos to you for having a bikini body even if it was 5 yrs. ago! I never had one, I have always had belly issues. </p> <p>BTW, you look fantastic in olive! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1657653 Mon, 09 May 2016 21:58:15 +0000 Lisa 1657653@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>First, you look wonderful in this color and style.&nbsp; Second, my favorite part about getting older, the confidence that comes with it.&nbsp; I wish I had the confidence now, back in my 20s.&nbsp; I would have saved myself a lot of pain and anguish if I did. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1657286 Mon, 09 May 2016 11:16:51 +0000 Brooklyn 1657286@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Olive counts as black for summer. You look fab as always, and I don't think the print and blue accents are OTT. Just perfect actually. I appreciate your honesty and understand where you are coming from. I am also prone to self criticism. But, as Lisa said so well, sometimes you have to show yourself some compassion too. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1657283 Mon, 09 May 2016 11:07:33 +0000 dakotacheryl 1657283@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Great thread Lisa and ladies!!</p> <p>I will be 59 in September and the changing post-menopausal body I have is still sometimes a stranger to me.</p> <p>If I didn't LOVE to cook well, and eat what I cook, I could easily be 10 lbs lighter, but that's not going to happen....so, I am at peace with my body (most days). I will continue to exercise, which for me is daily hikes with my dogs and swimming laps at the YMCA when I can.</p> <p>And of course last evening on my hike, I climbed through a barbed wire fence and got a great big 2-3 inch cut on the front of one knee, so now, all summer long, when I wear knee baring shorts or skirts, I will have this stupid red mark...sigh... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1657272 Mon, 09 May 2016 10:39:50 +0000 lyn67 1657272@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Your post resonated deep inside me &nbsp;and I have some olive pants like yours, thanx for the inspiration, love the sandals as well, and of course YLF!!</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1657213 Mon, 09 May 2016 06:09:39 +0000 Lyn D. 1657213@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I just read something along the lines of turning 'letting oneself go' into&nbsp;<br />'letting go' which sounds so much more about the acceptance we would all like to achieve.<br />Thanks for posting! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656879 Sun, 08 May 2016 11:56:05 +0000 UmmLila (Lisa) 1656879@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>After struggling with weight issues for 35 years and gotten to a place I find acceptable, I do give myself a hard time over the things I can / should be able to control, and I do weigh myself every day, and I do exercise a lot. It can be tiring to feel that your body needs constant vigilance to keep it on track. At the same time it's good to recognize your own achievements in other spheres and to always find compassion for yourself. And to be happy for the companionship here and know that you do look great as you are now. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656843 Sun, 08 May 2016 02:54:47 +0000 Jaime 1656843@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thought provoking thread. Yes, where is that magic land between acceptance and giving up? My grandmother never gave up until the day she died at 95 and she is, for better or worse, my "taking care of yourself" role model. She proudly the announced the 70th anniversary of her nose job a few years before we celebrated her 70th wedding anniversary (a party she fully orchestrated a few months before she died). And why is it so much easier to accept things we aren't "supposed to" control? I have a scar on my face from an unfortunate meeting with brass knuckles and I rarely give it a thought. The scars from adolescent weight gain tormented me for years - even though hardly anyone sees the latter and the former is right on my face (although not very noticeable I am told). Well I don't know the answer, but that is my overshare for the day.<br /><b>Angie</b> you have already fulfilled your goal for so many - but I am glad you are not one to rest on your laurels and will keep on doing what you do so well. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656810 Sun, 08 May 2016 00:38:52 +0000 Beth Ann 1656810@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>When I was teaching voice at the Uni, I used the term "sustainable excellence" with my students, and it's carried over into my own life. &nbsp;No one can give 100% to everything all the time, but we can learn to be fabulous in a way that allows us to enjoy all of the journey, and not just the peak moments.</p> <p>I've never met you, but your still photos hint at a vibrant and energetic woman -- someone who really moves and gets it done! &nbsp;You project an energy that is more of a fountain youth than any potion or surgery could ever deliver --- and you've got beauty to spare!</p> <p>I love the way your warm weather style brightens. &nbsp;It's still very sophisticated -- very "you," but it reflects the joy of warm days when the winters are long. &nbsp;And no bikini, no problem --- find yourself a great swimsuit that works for you today and hit the beach! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656798 Sun, 08 May 2016 00:19:44 +0000 amiable 1656798@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I hear you Lisa. &nbsp;I'm in somewhat of a mid-life crisis over here too - trying to figure out (again) who I am and how I want to look as I age. &nbsp;I don't lose weight easily like I used to, I have lines, and grey hair, and I do care, and want to look my best, but don't want to look like a kid..... &nbsp;And I'm not willing to make my life about losing weight either :)</p> <p>You look wonderful though - love your outfit and your acceptance of who you are in your body.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656714 Sat, 07 May 2016 20:49:58 +0000 CocoLion 1656714@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you for your honest post Lisa, I've enjoyed reading your thoughts and all of the responses. &nbsp;You inspire me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656675 Sat, 07 May 2016 17:47:09 +0000 jill58 1656675@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lisa, what an insightful post. I just turned 58 and you have articulated so much of what I feel. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656650 Sat, 07 May 2016 17:04:20 +0000 Chris987 1656650@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wow everyone here is so astute, eloquent, brave and honest. I'm loving every bit of it as I think about what I will wear and post as part of this challenge. </p> <p>I also have to share something I heard a few years ago that really cracked me up......your comment Lisa about "eating days are over"&nbsp;...made me remember it....it was an interview with actress Kim Cattrall who is just shy of 60 now.&nbsp;The interview was&nbsp; 5 - 10 years ago. The interviewer asked her how she stayed&nbsp;thin and in good shape. Here answer (with a twinkle in her eye) was "..I've been hungry since&nbsp;1975". &nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656618 Sat, 07 May 2016 16:04:36 +0000 Angie 1656618@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>*applause*</p> <p>Your outfit and musings are Killer, Lisa. FWIW, you have done me proud in this post. You look<b> as</b> incredible in your signature Summer outfit as you did in that bikini.</p> <p>There is a soft spot between “letting it all hang out” and self acceptance. The former can feel undignified, disrespectful to yourself, lethargic, and as if you have lost your zest for life. The latter can lead to obsessive comparing and despairing. Both are extreme and lead to unhappiness. <i>The point of the challenge was to find your sweet spot. </i>And it looks like you are well on your way, and you made my day. </p> <p>Your feelings about aging, body image and self acceptance are complex, Lisa (as they are for many of us, of course). It must have been quite cathartic for you to think through this challenge and organize your feelings. *more applause*. </p> <p>There is a strong disconnect between our minds and bodies as we age, because our minds feel more alive, wise and confidant than ever, but our bodies start to let us down. My almost 84 year old Papa can’t believe he sees an old man in the mirror or when he looks down at his wrinkled hands, as he puts it, because he feels 30 in his head. Getting older is a weird reality to process - and it doesn’t seem to get less weird as you age. But we <i>can</i> help each other feel comfortable in our aging bodies, and motivate each other to make doable healthy choices while we continue to live our short lives as happily as possible. That’s the point to all of this, and my life's goal as a fashion stylist.&nbsp;</p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656616 Sat, 07 May 2016 15:55:43 +0000 Elizabeth P 1656616@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What Viva said.&nbsp; Again.</p> <p>74????&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656606 Sat, 07 May 2016 15:16:14 +0000 viva 1656606@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wait. Bonnie is 74??!! I suddenly feel much, much better about the next 20 years.</p> <p>Life is good in this circle.</p> <p>:) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656594 Sat, 07 May 2016 14:25:11 +0000 Bonnie 1656594@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You are beautiful and intelligent and I love your style. I can assure you that getting older does not mean that you are going to lose anything important, it will just make you wiser and more content. I'm 74 and having a great time. I'm healthy, exercise (walk an hour a day, take yoga, etc), travel (actually driving from Banff to Jaspar this summer), have time for friends, and am interested in current styles in fashion. I probably worried too much about aging when I was your age, but now that I have arrived, I've discovered that I have the time and resources to &nbsp;actually do the things I was too busy for when I was young and that's a great thing. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656587 Sat, 07 May 2016 14:01:34 +0000 Anonymous 1656587@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Aliona - I absolutely understand the dignity component of this issue. My mother was very much about that - sometimes to the point where it bugged me to listen to her - but I'd rather maintain that sense of personal dignity than dress purely for comfort. &nbsp;Again, that theme of "letting it all hang out" &nbsp;- no thanks. &nbsp;I like your experimentation idea - that makes a lot of sense to me too. &nbsp;And what a bad bit of luck having to buy a new car right when you had planned a summer vacation . We haven't had a vacation in several years either - one thing or another always gets in the way. &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56/page/2#post-1656578 Sat, 07 May 2016 13:42:25 +0000 Anonymous 1656578@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Your post resonated with me hugely, Lisa, because I feel as you do. But first, I just want to say your outfit is smashing. I love seeing your summer look, and how different it can be from the items you choose in winter. Even though you have a more cohesive sense of style than me and you have the knowledge and skill to be more creative, your different seasonal styles make me feel better about my own chameleon tendencies. </p> <p>I also want to thank you for bravely putting the idea of "letting oneself go" out here. You, and all the commenters, have helped me think about where that concept and body acceptance meet. For me, the crux of things comes down to my own personal idea of dignity. It would take up way too much space to background that here, but I will do so as I explore Angie's summer challenge. In short, I still cling to the idea of decorum dressing after a certain age, and I can't seem to let go of some of the rules. </p> <p>But let's see if I can. After all, maybe those old rules date me. When it's warmer, I will wear (and post) outfits that expose my bingo wings and crepey skin. I will post pasty legs. I will post a bikini shot if I make it to the beach (summer holiday cancelled after we had to buy a new car). I want to challenge myself, to experiment with how it feels to go sleeveless or stockingless. Then, if I return to my comfort zone afterwards, I will know which of my 'standards' are rooted in lack of body acceptance and which come down to my sense of dignity. </p> <p>Thank you again for this wise and wonderful thread. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656575 Sat, 07 May 2016 13:33:26 +0000 Anonymous 1656575@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>chouette22 </b>- you and I are so alike - wow . And with regards to having to cut out a lot of food, period? Well, a few of my friends and I have acknowledged to each other that our eating days are over- as dramatic as it sounds. &nbsp;Maintaining or losing weight at this age means you just can't eat . And when you do drop your will power for an evening out , or for your husband's barbecued burgers (lol).....you know it means a few days of protein shakes and not much else. &nbsp;Whatever - I'm just glad Im not a foodie and really don't care . &nbsp;</p> <p><b>style fan</b> - yep, I bought these in the Steve Madden store here last summer - they still carry them and have a few different versions too - I may get another pair :)&nbsp;</p> <p><b>viva-&nbsp;</b>funny, I always wish my pants fit me the &nbsp;way yours fit you &nbsp;I think my mirror and camera angle are odd though - making it look like they are less flared/kicked out than they really are. These Gap jeans/pants never fit the same way twice, do they? &nbsp;I must have 3 or 4 pairs and none of them look the same . Yes, these could stand to be slouchier but , whatever - &nbsp;</p> <p><b>Everyone</b> : I'm so happy to hear that what I am writing about isn't foreign to you . It is a funny process, this aging thing, and sometimes I can't believe I'm here at 55 already. I don't think I had any expectations for what 55 would look like, but I'm not unhappy with this. &nbsp;There are so many other things to think about and worry about in life, and really....having a fit and healthy body is to be treasured, not scorned. &nbsp;And yes, comparison is death to the soul.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656570 Sat, 07 May 2016 13:20:18 +0000 Anonymous 1656570@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think you look great! Very far from Lilly Pulitzer though!<br />I would keep on with your health regimen (it's so much easier in the summer!) and make sure you allow yourself some ice cream after your vegan smoothie ;-)</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656560 Sat, 07 May 2016 12:51:30 +0000 RobinF 1656560@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lisa, I love this post. It says so clearly the issues with aging that I also feel. I want to be accepting of the changes but my mind still feels 35 so when I see myself it shocks me to look 54! </p> <p>I think you look great, love the summer look. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656558 Sat, 07 May 2016 12:45:14 +0000 Janet 1656558@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I can totally understand and relate to the internal tug-of-war, so you get sympathy and support from me! </p> <p>I love this outfit on you. It balances casual and fun and sophisticated, which is no small feat (one I aim for myself). The muted colors in the top keep the playfulness in check. But I really love the extra spark that your jewelry and nail color give the look! </p> <p>I'm only four years behind you, age-wise, but I'm struggling with similar feelings (although even at my skinniest I never looked as good as you in a bikini!). Most days, I'm ok with how I look, but we all have days when it's easy to feel "less than" for whatever reasons. We can be so hard on ourselves. </p> <p>I think you look fantastic, regardless of what age you are. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656556 Sat, 07 May 2016 12:43:26 +0000 chouette22 1656556@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What Viva said: Thanks for sharing your vibrant sense of self! I always enjoy your posts very much: your energy, critical stands, WIWs, self-deprecation, honesty. And I always recognize myself in your posts, very often I could have written them myself. Especially the part about body acceptance and aging. We are the exact same age. One big difference is your love for make-up which I don't share. I only do the minimum, as I never cared much for it (tomboy here). However, I am, should I say it, obsessed, with how my body looks or is changing and trying to hold on to my old shape as long as I possibly can. I have always been very athletic, just like you, and work out pretty much every day, quite intensely, for 45-55 min (cardio and weights). I really am in very good shape for my age. I enjoy it too and it really is no sacrifice. However, to maintain my weight, which is imperative for me, I really have to sacrifice when it comes to food, and if I didn't work out daily, I would have to reduce my intake even more. That for me is really hard. There are days when it's easy, and days when it's very tough, and days when I fall off the wagon. It requires so, so much discipline! But I enjoy fashion and just dislike very much how things look on me when I put on weight. It pulls me down emotionally so very much when it happens, and it does happen. I know you have the same struggles. There is a constant up and down, by just a few pounds, but at 5.1" it's enough to make a difference from feeling great to feeling crappy. Thus, all of this to say that I completely relate to your push-back feelings.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656553 Sat, 07 May 2016 12:25:03 +0000 Elizabeth P 1656553@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lisa, I fear you misinterpreted what I meant. You can bring it up as many times as you want, I think posts like this are fantastic. Sharing your journey on coming to terms with yourself does help many, myself included. I was also nodding along. I was trying to give you a pat on the back, and encouragement that perhaps YOU had reached another step in your journey. But if you haven't, or stall, or just want to reflect, or whatever.... Please post! Clearly I shouldn't comment late at night after a glass (or two) of wine. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656549 Sat, 07 May 2016 12:04:55 +0000 Ledonna N. 1656549@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Own IT, Rock It, Love It Sister </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656538 Sat, 07 May 2016 11:43:54 +0000 viva 1656538@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>PS That bikini picture of yours is wonderful. I actually thought it was from a Lily ad. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656537 Sat, 07 May 2016 11:42:15 +0000 viva 1656537@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>As I am shivering in wet, cold southern Maine I am green with envy at the spirited beauty of this ensemble! You look so beautiful - the proportions are fantastic (even though I am never sure I know what I am talking about when I say that). Really, what I mean is that I love how the pants fit you (different than on me), and that top looks perfectly suited to them in terms of shape, color, and length.&nbsp;</p> <p>I've been thinking a lot about aging lately. Partly because it's happening and partly because of the talk around the forum. There are some steps I have taken -- the procedures on my varicose veins -- which I am so, so glad I did. It gave my legs years of life and energy, and made me much less self-conscious about the rear view of my knees (which, you know, is VERY important). &nbsp;And other steps I muse about, like face-related stuff. Yesterday, I went to our baby Sephora (within JCPenney) to get a tinted moisturizer/foundation with more coverage than the LM. I've just reached the point where the discoloration and age spots (AGE SPOTS!) at the temples, etc., are really driving me crazy ....&nbsp;</p> <p>Anyway, not sure where I am going except that aging is just the latest roller coaster ride for me. Some days I am full of complete acceptance for myself, and some days it's harder.</p> <p>Thanks for sharing your vibrant sense of self. It's making a difference for me today. :)</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656518 Sat, 07 May 2016 10:32:30 +0000 Chris987 1656518@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Love this posting Lisa. You are talking about that tug of war between pushing yourself in various aspects&nbsp;of life vs. acceptance of where you are.&nbsp; You used words like&nbsp;"punishing myself" or "giving up". It's always a balancing act and that balance can and does change over an over, plus it's a little different for each of us. You said it all so well.</p> <p>I've never really liked the bright summer clothes I see everywhere, but I think that's because I worked full time for all those years and tended to take my vacation time NOT in summer, so I've always been working all summer. This year will be different so maybe I'll watch your postings (and other people I'm sure) and take some inspiration from the bights. </p> <p>Your outfit is really really lovely, right down to the jewelry and nails! Love how you've put the colors together.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-stand-wiw-56#post-1656514 Sat, 07 May 2016 09:36:39 +0000 Style Fan 1656514@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You look Fabulous.&nbsp; I see a woman who takes very good care of herself.&nbsp; I love the outfit.&nbsp; Those sandals are to die for.&nbsp; Did you buy them in Canada?<br />I look back at pictures of myself when I was skinny (pre menopause) and wonder why was I so hard on myself?&nbsp; The answer is a long book.&nbsp; </p>