https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1 Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sun, 17 May 2026 18:31:08 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1729607 Tue, 20 Sep 2016 13:26:44 +0000 chewyspaghetti 1729607@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm glad it went well- I was waiting to hear the outcome! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1729496 Tue, 20 Sep 2016 06:25:09 +0000 minimalist 1729496@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you all, so much. The GRIN on his face, when he looked in the mirrors, you would not believe. He looked really sharp, while still authentically himself and comfortable. </p> <p>I wish I knew how to post finds via iOS device; I'd love to post what the SA had him try on.<br /> <a href="http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/theory-yost-canvas-jacket/4251931?origin=category-personalizedsort&#038;fashioncolor=INK" rel="nofollow">http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/.....ncolor=INK</a><br /> <a href="http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/ag-graduate-sud-slim-straight-leg-pants/3645155?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&#038;fashioncolor=SULFUR%20INFANTRY%20KHAKI" rel="nofollow">http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/.....RY%20KHAKI</a><br /> <a href="http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/peter-millar-high-hat-check-regular-fit-sport-shirt/4214299?origin=category-personalizedsort&#038;fashioncolor=AVIO%20BLUE" rel="nofollow">http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/pe.....VIO%20BLUE</a><br /> <a href="http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/timberland-wodehouse-lost-history-boot-men/3059682?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&#038;fashioncolor=BURNISHED%20DARK%20BROWN%20LEATHER" rel="nofollow">http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/.....%20LEATHER</a><br /> <a href="http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/magnanni-catalux-leather-belt/4216387?origin=category-personalizedsort&#038;fashioncolor=CUERO%20BROWN" rel="nofollow">http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/.....RO%20BROWN</a></p> <p>I *really* wish I could post pictures of him in the outfit, but he didn't want me even to show pictures to close mutual friends. </p> <p>*K. Period.* "Good, interesting shoes or boots" will have to supplant the current jogger-style shoeniform, often in neons. I liked the brown chukkas on him; they seemed authentically him rather than just playing dress-up. </p> <p>*Liz* His shirts are too small around the belly. But a bigger size would, you're right, just be a tent around his shoulders and chest. </p> <p>*Colette* !!! Thank you for posting those. The SA had him try on exactly these pants. :-)</p> <p>*Kaelyn* Something sleek: yes, the jacket worked this way, as did chinos and shoes. Good point!</p> <p>*Sally* Here's to the "hopeless (fashion) case" SOs, and all their redeeming qualities.</p> <p>*Joy* Alas, he's recently renewed his (every 10 year) jeans supply, 6 pairs of some kind of Levis. They ...are certainly an improvement over the now-retired last-surviving pairs from the previous installment. Personal hygiene, per se, is probably fine; but some outerwear seems to have mold issues, and there might be general accumulation of perspiration in synthetic. </p> <p>*Bijou* "Unfortunately some guys hang onto clothes well past their use by date, so encourage him to get rid of items that are old and worn for a nice fresh start." This is very much the case here. I have no idea how to address it. </p> <p>*Barbara Diane* You might not need to get your DH into a store. If there's a Nordstrom near you, their return policies make it easy to pick up several sizes and styles, have him try them on at home, then return. Mr. Min went through a long time with zero minutes to shop, but we were able to schedule times for him to try on things I'd picked up. He's now 2/3 converted to flat fronts, without ever setting foot in store or ordering on-line; the spirit was willing but the calendar prevailed. </p> <p>*rachylou* He's got a scant 5'7" height, yes is "generally slim except for the tum," and yes, "his conversational quirks lean toward Big Bang Theory quirkiness," with a strong dose of making-up-statistics-and-probabilities-while-countering-whatever-was-just-said. (Yes, no matter what was said, including a woman talking about her own experience.) We're talking a date wardrobe, yes, but perhaps it's worth a general shift overall, in case there's a potential date encountered in the course of an average day.</p> <p>*Ledonna* Two out of your four verbotens are part of the current uniform. Perhaps rachylou would be interested? ;-)</p> <p>*Traci* He cut his own hair in preparation for the outing. It's better than the entirely-unaddressed situation had been. One day, perhaps soon, perhaps not at all, I'll get him to a professional.</p> <p>*Jenn* This man's jeans are long enough! See, he gets a few important aspects of fashion consistently right. :-)</p> <p>*La P* Underpinnings. I brought that up today, in presence of Mr. Min. They both didn't think it's that important early in the dating process. Neither of them is the race into bed type, and they didn't buy my argument that women may well pick up on what kind of underpinnings you're sporting even if we can't *see* them. </p> <p>*JAileen* No torch; I'm not his type. Among other things, he prefers ambitious (=using all earned degrees and professional credentials) women who, something about enthusiasm for certain hobbies and something about initiating activities like hiking weekends. </p> <p>As for looking his age, I didn't mean that in an ageist way; I suppose that in context we all look our ages, don't we? Perhaps it would be more accurate to say, he looks like 50 did in our grandparents' generation, or in a different region, or in a different socioeconomic class than he is. We live in an area where many mature, family-oriented mid-50s men are also washboard-abs fit and have a youthful energy about them. Those gentlemen might not be this man's actual competition when dating, but many people around here remain single in part because they believe themselves to have options such as the many ultra-fit, vibrantly youthful people they encounter. </p> <p>*Chris987* Wonderful idea on taking pictures, perhaps including of his usual outfits. Mr. Min and I have both taken pictures of him for use on dating sites, but we've kept them as flattering as possible. Outfits out of focus! :-)</p> <p>*Staysfit* Shirt fit is really a challenge. The SA put him in a slim cut, which looked good around the shoulders but pulled very distractingly (to my eye) across his belly. And YES to machine-wash, although I'm wondering if the washing machine in his building isn't perhaps part of the mold-smell aspect the body odor issue. </p> <p>*RunCarla* That sounds like a wonderfully constructive shopping day with your son! Thank you for the boxers tip, which I suspect Mr. Min will use long before this friend does. </p> <p>*elpgal* I kept it even simpler and just went to Nordstrom, where a lovely SA did all the collecting. (Cologne/aftershave would be viewed as socially insensitive in this region: lots of people find that synthetic scents give them migraines or other unpleasant symptoms. Here it's very bad form to wear scent anywhere others can't escape it immediately.)</p> <p>*Traci* No spandex shirts; there's something else going on with the weird fit issues, possibly posture. And the smell is probably a complex, compound issue. </p> <p>Thank you all for your support; I was very worried going in. It turned out as well as it possibly could have! </p> <p>This friend is such a solidly GOOD person with *so* many solidly positive traits, and would make an exceptionally kind, giving, and understanding partner for the right woman. I find it sad that superficial things are likely getting in the way of his quest for love and someone to build a together with. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728914 Sun, 18 Sep 2016 20:26:37 +0000 Traci 1728914@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Okay, I can't help it, I have to ask. &nbsp;Is he wearing spandex shirts like this? &nbsp;<a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.jcpenney.com/xersion-compression-crew-tee/prod.jump?ppId=pp5006241586&amp;country=US&amp;currency=USD&amp;selectedSKUId=57801101479&amp;selectedLotId=5780110&amp;fromBag=true&amp;quantity=1&amp;cm_mmc=ShoppingFeed-_-GooglePLA-_-T-shirts-_-57801101479&amp;utm_medium=cse&amp;utm_source=google&amp;utm_campaign=t-shirts&amp;utm_content=57801101479&amp;gclid=CKbvgarfmc8CFYs7gQod7XMKTA&amp;kwid=productads-adid^45810122978-device^c-plaid^76121677538-sku^57801101479-adType^PLA"><a href="http://www.jcpenney.com/xersion-compression-crew-tee/prod.jump?ppId=pp5006241586&#038;country=US&#038;amp" rel="nofollow">http://www.jcpenney.com/xersio.....S&#038;amp</a>;</a>&nbsp; I tend to find men's clothes so forgiving of a bit of tummy, and these shirts are the first thing that came to mind when you said his current uniform is accentuating the tum.&nbsp;</p> <p>So, the reason I ask is this kind of fabric can be really terrible for holding smells. &nbsp;That could be part of his intermittent odor problem. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728912 Sun, 18 Sep 2016 20:17:34 +0000 elpgal 1728912@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'd keep it simple. Take him to one store say BR. Have him try a couple different styles of jeans, khakis, shirts, tees and pills. make him a small capsule wardrobe with a few different items. Take him to a shoe store and get him a nice pair of shoes and leather flip-flops. Perhaps an outdoor store for some shorts and wicking shirts in case he has to do active stuff with potential paramours. Leave the undies to him a run to Target for some nice deployed and some basic aftershave/cologne.</p> <p>ETA: ignore what I wrote, just buy him Collete's finds! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728805 Sun, 18 Sep 2016 15:11:51 +0000 rachylou 1728805@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lol! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728792 Sun, 18 Sep 2016 14:49:29 +0000 Ledonna N. 1728792@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Rachylou no to dad jeans.</p> <p>I think it is great you helping him and he allowing you to do so. </p> <p>Be careful with the male ego sometimes it can be sensitive </p> <p>Also think about tailoring no size is perfect. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728786 Sun, 18 Sep 2016 14:16:26 +0000 Carla 1728786@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What Kperiod said about flat front vs pleated (made a huge difference for DH when he went from super slim to having a little tum in late 40's). Also good underwear, socks. My sons introduced DH to Lulu Lemon long leg boxers, for which I am grateful! Love Colette's pics. Figure out what colour(s) work for the guy, too. Haircut is a good idea. If he's willing, get him to an aesthetician for a men's mani/pedi. </p> <p>When I did a big wardrobe shop with DS#1 we spent a long day with him developing a capsule around a shirt he really liked. I took pictures of EVERY item/combination. We found a quiet place in the store and reviewed all the photos and he made decisions about what worked and what didn't. The photos really told a story! He ended up not getting the first shirt (it didn't fit) but it was a great jumping off point for a useful capsule. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728764 Sun, 18 Sep 2016 12:57:33 +0000 Staysfit 1728764@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I agree with the fit issue. My DH is tall and has an athletic build. In lieu of good fit he sometimes resorts to purchasing size XL which looks awful. Getting the right fit works wonders regardless of the trendiness of an item. It also sounds like you should look for machine wash rather than dry clean items. It's just a guess given your description of his personality. Good luck with your shopping trip. Maybe your friend will be brave enough to show off his purchases. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728757 Sun, 18 Sep 2016 12:27:10 +0000 Chris987 1728757@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Another vote for modern versions of basics that fit well. I know a LOT of men that meet your friend's description. My DH also fits that description when he's working at home (except for the paunch). When he's leaving the house he wears better fitted&nbsp;clothes in slightly better fabrics but they still tend to be well-worn. </p> <p>Fit is the FIRST thing and your friend may have his own ideas about fit that you might have to push him on a little. If you can get him to try on several different sizes to compare/contrast that would be great. Maybe you can also try taking pics of him as he's trying stuff on and show him the pics...I know that approach works wonders for me because it moves me&nbsp;from what I think to what I see....if he can start to see what others see it might help him change his approach...</p> <p>Kudos to you&nbsp;for&nbsp;taking this on! You are very brave </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728677 Sun, 18 Sep 2016 01:22:49 +0000 JAileen 1728677@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>First, I think it's so nice of you to help him. He's not carrying a torch for you, is he? That could be awkward. </p> <p>"Mid 50s and looks it". Ouch. </p> <p>I love Colette's wardrobe suggestions. Very nice! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728583 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 17:14:30 +0000 LaPed 1728583@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've had to help my SO build a wardrobe. He was black tees and jeans everyday, which worked fine for him until he changed jobs and ended up in a business-casual office. What I've learned:</p> <p>1. Stick to a single basic silhouette. My husband now wears an oxford shirt and chinos pretty much every day. We've tried a bunch of brands and now stick to the ones that fit him best: JCrew for slim fit for trousers and Land's End slim fit for shirts (one of the only true slim fits out there). I have yet to find a smart-casual overcoat that doesn't swallow him whole -- he's a skinny guy. That's my challenge for this winter. :)</p> <p>2. Color and fit matter *a lot*. The vast majority of poorly dressed men are poorly dressed because they don't actually know what well-fitting clothes look like, because they've never worn them. Also, mens clothes don't have anywhere for flaws to "hide" -- now flounces or ruffles or tunics, etc. Go to a department store with knowledgable SAs and a generous alterations policy. Encourage him to have things tailored. Encourage him to learn his own measurements (my husband didn't even know his own shoe size when I met him; like, he'd just go in and get measured every time he needed a new pair...). My husband has low-contrast summer coloring and gorgeous (I'm biased) blue eyes, so I've gently weaned him off black and into graphite, navy, french blue, heather grey, greens, and some cooler browns and taupes. &nbsp;</p> <p>His wardrobe is more cohesive than mine now! I'm actually a bit jealous.&nbsp;</p> <p>One last thing -- check his underpinnings. Get him to throw out any underwear that are full of holes and replace them with something that fits well and isn't too bulky (I think traditional boxers are too voluminous under a lot of the contemporary slimmer-cut trousers; boxer briefs give a nicer line). Make sure he has functional undershirts that fit and get him to put them on *under* his *shirts*. And socks -- no white athletic socks! Get some decent crew socks in a variety of neutrals that match the rest of his wardrobe. Wool is good at minimizing foot stink. Nothing worse than grungy white socks peeking out from under a slick new pair jeans or trousers. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728582 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 17:11:42 +0000 Jenn 1728582@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My suggestion is to have him model clothes he's trying on. Let's just say that neither my husband nor my son has an eye for PPL, and they'll happily walk out of the dressing room with pants that are inches too short for them if I don't check. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728574 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 16:54:49 +0000 rachylou 1728574@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Aww, I have a soft spot for dad jeans... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728543 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 15:46:28 +0000 MsGreer 1728543@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm with Ledonna N. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728540 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 15:39:26 +0000 Traci 1728540@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Maybe you could binge watch Queer Eye for the Straight Guy on Amazon before the big trip? &nbsp;Definitely try to get him in for an updated haircut and grooming while you're at it. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728403 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 08:40:01 +0000 Ledonna N. 1728403@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Just clean him up you will do great. I work in it with all men. Please stay away from:</p> <p> dockers<br /> Dad jeans<br /> Socks with sandals<br /> Plaid short sleeve shirts.</p> <p>That is all. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728391 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 08:03:32 +0000 rachylou 1728391@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>That's an interesting question. To be straight: I'm thinking clean and neat - but not too neat - is the way to go. Things depend a little on body type. If he's a bit round and slouchy in the overall impression, hair should be short and clothes trim - no pleats, shirts tucked flat. If he's got height and is generally slim except for the tum, there's a little leeway in how close a shirt needs to fit. If his conversational quirks lean toward Big Bang Theory quirkiness, I'd be vigilant about anything clever or too sharp...that's a mixed message. Subdued is a better way to go. No black turtlenecks under graphic tees and Beatles Hair. We're talking a date wardrobe, right? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728378 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 06:09:17 +0000 Barbara Diane 1728378@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Good luck! I'm going to use some of these ideas for my DH, if I can get him into the store. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728354 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 04:14:24 +0000 Bijou 1728354@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I love everything that Colette has picked and would buy these for my husband (also in IT). A well fitting blazer does a lot to sharpen a guy's look and hide a little bit if middle aged spread. Some new t-shirts and shirts will help with the body odour. Unfortunately some guys hang onto clothes well past their use by date, so encourage him to get rid of items that are old and worn for a nice fresh start.<br />Wishing you both much success. You are a great friend to help him in this way. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728341 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 03:07:58 +0000 Anonymous 1728341@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>He might look better in cargo pants or cords than jeans, which can be hard to fit on a paunchy waist and still fit well through the hips.<br /> Does he bathe and put on clean clothes ( boxers, socks, and everything else from body out).<br /> Talk to him about good posture. It makes everything look better.<br /> Just as Angie advises us...start with hair style and specs, (but probably not a bra fitting.) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728333 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 02:51:47 +0000 Sally 1728333@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My SO is a hopeless case but a friend of mine has her husband (early 60s) in black jeans and turtle necks with a blazer. She's almost set him up in a uniform. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728299 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 00:50:10 +0000 Kaelyn 1728299@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Same age and profession as my dad! I vote something modern and comfortable. Whatever men's modern classics would be. Especially because your friend is fit and would probably look good in something sleek. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728295 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 00:44:52 +0000 Colette 1728295@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I buy my SO's clothing, he is not a hipster or trend dresser. See examples in finds. You need to make sure the fit is right, my SO always wants the size that is too big on him. </p> <p>Updated blue jeans<br /> Casual pants<br /> Casual shirt-plaid or stripe or one of each to wear on its own, layered with a dressy t-shirt, sweater or both. Can even wear it under a sport coat.<br /> Dressy t-shirt to layer<br /> Merino or cashmere pullover<br /> Updated casual shoes and coordinating belt<br /> Coordinating socks and boxer briefs</p> <p>If he really wants to bring it:<br /> Blazer-black or navy<br /> Dress pants<br /> Dress shoe<br /> Dress shirt </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728285 Sat, 17 Sep 2016 00:09:41 +0000 Liz 1728285@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Do these outfits give any ideas? <br /><a href="http://www.eddiebauer.com/campaign/outfitting-men?Previouspage=GNAV&amp;cm_sp=topnav-_-men-_-outfits" rel="nofollow">http://www.eddiebauer.com/camp.....-_-outfits</a></p> <p>From seeing some episodes of What Not to Wear, with men, the biggest revelation for them seemed to be wearing clothes that fit. They'd always felt better buying the XL or XXL (seems more manly than an M), and then were drowning in baggy fabric, drooping sleeves, and sagging shirts and pants. When Clinton talked them into trying a smaller size (not tight, just not baggy), they couldn't believe how good they could look. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728276 Fri, 16 Sep 2016 23:46:50 +0000 K. Period. 1728276@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My thoughts from dressing my husband (about that age): &nbsp;</p> <p>Two things: Flat front pants that are neither too voluminous, nor too skinny. &nbsp;Good, interesting shoes or boots. Not modern tennis shoes or anything too hip unless they are his style, just current versions of a classic, quality leather shoe. &nbsp;If he isn't into fashion, the worst mistake would to buy something too hipsterish that he'll feel uncomfortable in. &nbsp;Okay, three things. &nbsp;A non-office woven shirt in a current cut. &nbsp;No obvious novelty patterns (like palm trees). &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/taking-a-male-friend-style-shopping-your-suggestions-1#post-1728271 Fri, 16 Sep 2016 23:36:31 +0000 minimalist 1728271@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This weekend I'm taking a male friend to Nordstrom's to try on some current clothing. He's agreed to try things on just to see how they look and feel, in order to further his mission of finding love. </p> <p>Any ideas of what to have him try on?<br /> - mid-50s and looks it; though he prides himself on walking everywhere and being fit, he has a bit of a paunch, which his current wardrobe/style of wearing that wardrobe heavily accentuates<br /> - IT worker in traditional company, so no need to dress any differently</p> <p>I hesitate to describe his current "uniform," because it's hard to describe both accurately and diplomatically in a manner suitable to the good tone of this forum.</p> <p>I didn't think he'd agree to this, and now that he has, I really have no idea where to start! The SAs are lovely but I don't want to waste their time if he's just going to try things on and decide they're too new. </p> <p>He's a wonderful person, a very good friend, and at the foundation a good-looking guy. It's really just his appearance (oh, and perhaps a few conversational quirks, and an unpredictably recurrent body odor issue) that is unnecessarily narrowing the range of women he could appeal to.</p> <p>What do modern casual relaxed men of his age wear? </p>