YouLookFab Forum » Topic: Style portrayal

YouLookFab Forum » Topic: Style portrayal https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Wed, 29 Apr 2026 17:37:37 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php rachylou on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540632 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 18:43:06 +0000 rachylou 1540632@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Omg, squawks!! The barefoot-large dog-tousled hair kids-house mag photo! Yes yes! I know it! Which reminds me... The 'girls who lunch' now a days... instead of buying a club house they open shops that sell $500 yarn dolls made by bush people and staffed by weepy, emotionally fragile women... kills those charity/career requirements with one stone while leaving time for lunch... Gaylene on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540623 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 18:10:06 +0000 Gaylene 1540623@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ *laughing*. Thanks Rachylou, for the definitive explanation of "ladies who lunch", especially their transition into Hipsters 2.0. Same social clubbiness, but the uniform has to keep up with the times. Who, after all, wears gloves, hats, and mink coats these days? Can I suggest that one hallmark of the new version is being photographed barefoot in a short, designer dress in her gorgeous home with a large dog and two perfectly tousled kids who ride their bikes on the immaculate floors--just keeping it real, of course. rachylou on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540610 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 17:23:07 +0000 rachylou 1540610@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I rather think Vanity Fair, like T&C, is suffering from A) age gap ignorance and B) the formal end of segregation. I mean, the authors of The Preppy Handbook realised there was a problem and did a revision. The last issue of T&C was a desperate - yes desperate - effort to name some Swans, a la CZ. Anyways, CZ and Jackie O and so forth are not quite ladies who lunch. They were too high profile and traveled too much, esp. to foreign countries. Plus Jackie was Catholic. The ladies who lunch were the lower profile, opera committee grunts. In smaller cities, they had a relative in the ladies who did the church charity coat collection once a year wearing gloves. There's a bit of difference between 'social clubs' and 'country clubs.' Ladies who lunch is really a social club thing. You see, the club has to be ladies only and close at 4 p.m. Too many night events at these country clubs... Not to mention MEN. Anyways, the clubs are outmoded, but I'd argue the ladies are still there. WASPs didn't go anywhere. They just became Hipster 2.0's. P.s. I will argue against Real Housewives being the new ladies who lunch because their husbands don't really the run the world. Melinda Gates would be more like it, except she's a 'horrid liberal' Anonymous on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540609 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 17:22:03 +0000 Anonymous 1540609@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Vix -- so funny. "Divorced badly" => me. "Average Jane" => also me. annagybe on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540593 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 16:31:32 +0000 annagybe 1540593@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I wasn't trying to offend anyone. Shannon, I knew exactly what look you were talking about when you said you didn't want "Ladies who lunch". I know you meant no harm.  I was just intrigued by the use of the phrase, the semantics. I just thought it was very interesting. Vildy's Vanity Fair article described exactly what I was thinking of. Many of the women on here are a bit older. I was just thinking if the phrase was told to someone under thirty would they even understand. We all have our style aversions, our poison eyes. And it can very difficult to describe a visual medium in text, ie all art criticism.  Vix on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540590 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 16:22:11 +0000 Vix 1540590@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ While I agree that many may not have an instant visual or cultural  "get" re the ladies who lunch term, it's a phrase that does have a lot of meaning.  Good news: being a woman who lunches with friends will never make one a LWL. Nor will wealth and/or social striving alone, so Real Housewives and yummie mummies in Lululemon don't qualify either. I'm sure there are approximately 4,509,215 signifiers of being a LWL I'll never know since I'm Not Their Kind, Dear.  However, I feel pretty confident that for this EXTREMELY financially, socially, and culturally privileged group: <ul> <li>working for an income shows you either married or divorced badly </li> </ul> <ul> <li>social capital (behind the scenes power) matters greatly, and one should aim to control or heavily influence those who rule key institutions (artistic, religious, and public/governmental) </li> </ul> <ul> <li>worrying about what Average Janes think about your way of doing anything, let alone dressing, is...cough...rare</li> </ul> Another pop culture LWL: Jackie Florrick (Peter's mom) on The Good Wife Photo 1: Actress Mary Beth Peil at an event Photo 2-3: "Jackie Florrick" Cool interview with MBP on Jackie's motivations/mindset <a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/04/16/the-good-wife-mary-beth-peil-on-jackie-dawson-s-creek-and-more.html"><a href="http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/04/16/the-good-wife-mary-beth-peil-on-jackie-dawson-s-cre" rel="nofollow">http://www.thedailybeast.com/a.....wson-s-cre</a>...</a> Anonymous on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540561 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 14:54:08 +0000 Anonymous 1540561@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Shannon -- your comments were not offensive in the least.   That said, this has been a fascinating thread.  I never realized until now just how much that term is firmly entrenched.  In my part of the world that term is most definitely derogatory, primarily because it represents selfishness and shallowness to the ninth degree.  And it is not about being a lady or being someone that lunches with friends, it is about an attitude.  If you have that attitude, you just might be a lady that lunches.....  And perhaps that is what you aspire to be.   Oh, and I'm on the east coast.   Thistle on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540554 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 14:42:17 +0000 Thistle 1540554@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Not sure why it would be derogatory other than someone isn't looking for that style. I am not really looking to add arty or bohemian to my style descriptors, but I still adore the look on other fab bears. I pictured LWL as an older, preppier, very wealthy crowd. More like Grades Dames. I have never seen any of the movies referenced, so maybe I was off base. The grandmother form Gilmore girls is exactly what I pictured. It rang true for me as I see it as a certain look you may or may not want to aspire to. I've never seen Real Housewives either, but my Impression of them is that they are far . . . Not sure I can express my thoughts without offending. So, perhaps more gouche, and less refined than traditional LWL. kkards on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540525 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 13:57:06 +0000 kkards 1540525@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ i think ladies who lunch may also be a very east coast term…..i see similarly to how Dashielle has described it….i say its an east coast term, because it very much still exists today, and the real housewives series wants you to believe that they represent it, but anyone who's spent time on the Upper East Side of NYC, or Greenwich CT, etc, it really misses the mark. these are smart, well educated women, who have left the workforce to focus on raising children (and yes, moving there husbands career forward), and for many charity. anyway, maybe ladies who lunch is not the right name for this group anymore….it should be school drop off moms. Carla on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal/page/2#post-1540521 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 13:42:42 +0000 Carla 1540521@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ When used in the context of a fashion forum, and when used to articulate a style descriptor, I put the emphasis on 'the look' rather than the lifestyle (or social signifier as Rhubarbgirl so aptly suggests). Using a term like LWL, Geek, Preppy, Punk, Hipster, etc. let's me think 'Aha! I SEE!' - with less words than an item by item breakdown of an outfit. Since we often outline what we DON'T want to look like as much as what we DO when struggling with composing our 'look' the discriptor that goes in the 'DON'T' column takes on a negative connotation, alas. Anonymous on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540520 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 13:41:11 +0000 Anonymous 1540520@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Shannon, I'm guessing Deb is referring to my comments, not yours. And she's right: I was being very judgy, for which I apologise. Your original post was not in the least judgemental and came across meaning exactly what you intended it to. Janet on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540508 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 13:08:53 +0000 Janet 1540508@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I don't find the term derogatory, and I have known a number of women who fit into that demographic and style category. I associate it the same way Dashielle describes it. I think I first heard the term well over 20 years ago when I worked for a private school -- and yes, many of the students' mothers (or more likely grandmothers) were LWL. dakotacheryl on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540495 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 12:33:52 +0000 dakotacheryl 1540495@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Shannon, your comment was not offensive in the least...and you better not think of leaving this forum!! Transcona Shannon on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540490 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 12:07:19 +0000 Transcona Shannon 1540490@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I feel like I need to chime back in here and give an explanation of how I meant the term in the thread Anna referenced. I did not mean the expression to be derogatory nor offensive, and did not consider it to be dated in my post either. I wasn't applying the term to anyone else. I simply meant that I PERSONALLY do not wish to have elements of MY style look a particular way - in the same way others do not want to have elements of RATE or drape in theirs. Isn't that what personal style is all about? In my thread, I used the term as not wanting to look too prim and proper. Clearly the expression can have different meanings to different people. And I will say that reactions to innocent comments such as mine is one of the reasons I sometimes wonder if forum participation is really for me. Deb on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540477 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 11:34:45 +0000 Deb 1540477@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I'm glad this subject has come up. I've read this term several times here in the past and it is an outdated and derogatory term really. One that has the potential to offend. If nothing else has come out of the post feminist era, women can live the life they choose, with whatever level of wealth they have, eating as they wish, without being put down or judged by random women on forums. Summer on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540468 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 11:02:44 +0000 Summer 1540468@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You're right, Anna: this is a rather dated term now, and I can imagine that younger people may be unfamiliar with it.  It's some time since I last heard it, but I agree that it often does carry a derogatory connotation.  Real Housewives would be an excellent substitute. Aliona, Smittie and Dashielle - I think your definitions are spot on. Jaime on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540321 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 01:20:26 +0000 Jaime 1540321@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I understand the reference as Dashielle et al, but do think there could be a new term for the Real Housewives look. I will be lunching with a friend tomorrow and will fall over if anyone is wearing pearls but expect to see at least a few that could fit into the RH pinterest board. Rambling Ann on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540309 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 00:31:11 +0000 Rambling Ann 1540309@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I read it once in the context that Dashielle described. The Best Dressed awards in the Houston paper, a big charity do. It was definitely meant as complimentary. Chanel suits, charity galas, the wealthiest of the wealthy with season tickets to the front row at the opera. They are still doing the awards but I don't see the detailed interviews with the winners like they used to have in the paper: favorite designer, perfume, preferred skirt length, the winner's favorite charity, etc. The one thing I remember that was useful was that the ladies all professed to knowing what length skirt best suited their legs and hemming to that length regardless of fashion.  Style Fan on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540305 Sun, 16 Aug 2015 00:21:41 +0000 Style Fan 1540305@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ It might depend on where you live.  Ladies who lunch brought up a very different picture in my mind.  I only heard the term on the forum.  No where else. I liked some of the hair dos. catgirl on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540240 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 21:16:36 +0000 catgirl 1540240@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Well, I have an exact idea of what Shannon meant - perhaps that's because I'm dated myself these days! Vildy on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540238 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 21:05:58 +0000 Vildy 1540238@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ yes and Carolina Herrera became the designer, whereas at the start she was often sniffed at as a dilettante.  annagybe on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540235 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 20:53:49 +0000 annagybe 1540235@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Yes, Vildy, that is what I was trying to reference. Great read. Thanks. Funny thing is Jackie Kennedy is still considered a style icon today. Vildy on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540232 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 20:39:15 +0000 Vildy 1540232@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <a href="http://www.vanityfair.com/style/2012/02/ladies-who-lunched-201202" rel="nofollow">http://www.vanityfair.com/styl.....hed-201202</a> donnat on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540231 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 20:27:25 +0000 donnat 1540231@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Cheryle and dashielle .... exactly. shedev on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540229 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 20:22:57 +0000 shedev 1540229@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ My understanding of the term is in line with Dashielles description. I think the term was in an old skit on Saturday Night Live, and I've seen it used in the 90's show Dharma and Greg (it describes Greg's mom really well). Laura (rhubarbgirl) on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540210 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 18:53:14 +0000 Laura (rhubarbgirl) 1540210@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ There's a current day Silicon Valley version of ladies who lunch, for sure. Usually it's SAHMs who are pretty well off and have household help, so once they get the kids off to school they go to exercise class, run errands and go shopping, and have lunch with friends. Their look tends to include a lot of athleisure wear worn with very done hair and big statement bags. Since I work at home and often run errands during the day, or go out to lunch to get out of the house and see people, I end up cohabitating with this group a lot. There are lovely people in this crowd and not so lovely, just like any other group, but it definitely is a trend around here. The gal who writes the Recovering Shopaholic blog had a post recently comparing her clothes now with a year or two ago, and she called her older outfits very 'church going', which I thought was a good descriptor. In my area her outfits would be thought of as very outdated and old, but in other areas they'd be very mainstream. There are a lot of social signifiers in clothes and outfits, to put it mildly. Sometimes a description can be factual but also used to connotate approval or disapproval of a certain group. cheryle (Dianthus) on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540208 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 18:48:27 +0000 cheryle (Dianthus) 1540208@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I agree that it was initially coined to reference the wives of men who were in positions of power and wealth who were part of a specific social structure.  It brings to mind Daughters of the American Revolution where the members are held to fairly strict rules for dress and decorum and daughters have a "coming out" party.  The group is not known for being bold but rather for conforming to societal strictures. I don't think of it is an offensive descriptor any more than I would take offense at the term power dressing to refer to a senior lawyer who conforms to the strict rules of court. Shannon, you are know well enough here that no one would consider your comments to be anything intentionally offensive. dashielle (Ann) on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540205 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 18:40:13 +0000 dashielle (Ann) 1540205@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ The term was initially used for so-called 'country club wives' who were wealthy and spend most of their time arranging events for charity and the like, often over lunch. Their dress often ran quite conservative compared to today's standards, so pearls, Chanel jackets and hair coiffed within an inch of its life. Anonymous on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540164 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 17:14:50 +0000 Anonymous 1540164@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Jenn and Always Trying -- you're probably right. I'm not from the States so I may have put my own interpretation on this term. I first heard it used when I worked in New York so assumed it was meant to describe the wealthy city types. To Shannon's point, the country club set I've encountered do dress a lot more stodgily. Jenn on "Style portrayal" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/style-portrayal#post-1540161 Sat, 15 Aug 2015 17:06:58 +0000 Jenn 1540161@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I think of it as what always trying said. Like the blueblood grandmother in Gilmore Girls.