https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Mon, 27 Apr 2026 00:20:36 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667747 Thu, 26 May 2016 20:46:07 +0000 Roxanna 1667747@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I second what everyone has said here, and I also chime in to commiserate, I have a condition called Myasthenia Gravis, which makes the lid of my left eye droop, especially when i am tired or stressed. It bothers me when i look at pics, but the truth is, this condition could have been much worse (affecting movement on my whole left side) so i am thankful i got away with just the eyelid. i do like the suggestions here though and may give glasses a try (even though i now wear contacts almost exclusively.) I never thought of it as a great 'cover up.'</p> <p>Thanks for sharing such a personal story - and know that some of us struggle along with you :)</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667628 Thu, 26 May 2016 16:10:56 +0000 viva 1667628@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I appreciate that you shared such a personal story, and I really wish you the best in finding a solution. It might help to think of glasses as a fashion accessory, which is really what they have become to so many people. I used to wear glasses all the time and then had Lasik, and while I appreciate waking up and being able to see, I often miss the extra jolt of style that glasses gave me. Lately I have been snatching up a lot (too many???) pairs of reading glasses, and I am accumulating quite the collection. What's interesting for me to consider is that I am also an introvert and I wonder if part of what I like about glasses is the shield they provide, too. In any event, I guess ultimately what I am saying is there are MANY reasons to wear glasses, and you've described a way they can have high utility for you in certain circumstances. I hope you give them a try, and I hope they are useful and also a fun and new way for you to express your style. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667592 Thu, 26 May 2016 15:25:18 +0000 rachylou 1667592@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sure, why not? It's nice to help other people with THEIR issues, hehe. You'll probably have a lot of fun too. My work and real babies like fashion glasses, so you'll be right in line with the 'little ones.'</p> <p>I personally am a little attention blind to these things. Like when my one work baby said he wanted to start a gang and call it the Red Chin Gang, because of the birthmark that covers his chin and neck...and then, well, had to explain that all to me. I was like, *where did that name come from?* Lol.</p> <p>I like the white frames look, btw, lol. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667569 Thu, 26 May 2016 14:40:54 +0000 Angie 1667569@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>That's a good strategy, Becky. Fashion is there to have fun with, and to support you in the best possible way. We'll be your specs cheerleaders from the sidelines.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667522 Thu, 26 May 2016 13:24:05 +0000 cobaltblue 1667522@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I really posted and ran yesterday; my afternoon turned out much busier than I expected. Thank you all for the replies and suggestions. I will keep them in mind when I take my initial trip to the optical shop later today.</p> <p><b>Kookaburra </b>- I think you are right. My husband is like your coworker in that he also looks much better in glasses. He agrees and is very selective when it comes time to choose new frames.</p> <p><b>JAileen </b>- yes, isn't it great to be able to see? A slight tint is an interesting idea, and I'll take a look at the optical shop when I go. I know they have a few options including an old-fashioned green. (although I'm pretty sure that shade with my complexion would be a BAD. PLAN.)&nbsp;</p> <p><b>Ledonna</b>, thank you for reading. It is very helpful to hear that your coworker has found some success with this method of camouflage. I know my eye problem can't be totally concealed, but it would be nice to have a bit of distraction and not have that be the first thing people notice about me every time.</p> <p><b>Suz </b>and <b>Angie</b>, thank you for your twin responses. It's really nothing I suffer from (never painful, and I see really well except for things that require real depth perception, like catching a ball) - it's mostly a fashion/social problem! Maybe I can wear specs like armor when I know I'm going into battle and need a confidence boost! Or perhaps I will find a pair I like so much that I will wear them more frequently, who knows?</p> <p><b>BrieN</b>, I will definitely post pictures of specs options! I have made some BAD choices of specs in the past and know I need some hand-holding. Thanks for your compliment - my cheekbones (from my Mom) are probably my favorite feature.</p> <p><b>Runs With Scissors</b>, you definitely understand the issue! Your initial reaction is how I often feel. Actually the friend who suggested the glasses first said "*bleep* those guys, you do not want to work with such guys" (English not my friend's first language, but I like the force of his statement. He also did not actually say *bleep*). Mostly I dress for myself, but sometimes I just don't want to deal with the discomfort and bewilderment of others. It's so hard for people to handle anyone who looks the slightest bit "off," it seems.&nbsp;</p> <p>And my eyes are definitely the "after" version! In my baby pictures I am VERY cross-eyed and also had the "pirate baby" post-surgery patch stage. I actually had the surgery twice (once on one eye, once on both), so I have "pirate toddler" pictures, too. I'm very grateful for those surgeries even though they didn't completely fix the problem. Maybe I'll pull out the baby book and show you all a picture!&nbsp;</p> <p><b>Runcarla</b>, thank you for sharing your son's experience. The 'game face' sounds just right. I have noticed that I tilt my head, too, though not extremely. I make an effort to square myself when I find that I'm crooked, but 30+ years of habit is hard to undo, I think. I read recently that it's a common habit of adults with strabismus and only then realized that I do it. My eye condition is much more noticeable if I'm tired or stressed, too.</p> <p><b>Aliona</b>, great idea with the readers; I'll take a look. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667468 Thu, 26 May 2016 12:10:58 +0000 Anonymous 1667468@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You have a beautiful face with lovely bone structure and a stunning, welcoming smile. I'd say have fun with specs--do whatever it takes to feel as gorgeous as you look. </p> <p>There are some fun reading glasses in the market, often less expensive (and more interesting looking) than regular specs. I have found that the lenses on readers are often fairly easy to pop out, so you can get an idea of how they look before you take the leap into clear lenses--or pop the lenses back in and return if you decide they don't work. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667451 Thu, 26 May 2016 11:04:12 +0000 Carla 1667451@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Youngest son (24 years) was born with an underdeveloped right eye, and wears a schleral lens - which is a fancy name for the shell or artificial eye that fits over it - like a giant contact lens. The artificial 'eye' moves, but not with the same range of motion. Also, due to the blindness, he has developed an 'excentric head tilt' to cope with nystagmus (involuntary side to side movement) of the sighted lift eye. The nystagmus becomes more pronounced when he is under stress. </p> <p>Like you, when he looks a person in the eye, it appears that he is looking over their shoulder or over their head (he is very tall). He has found that if he looks at a persons left earlobe, he gives a good approximation of of 'straight on'. </p> <p>He also has 'cool' glasses (though he prefers not to wear them most of the time) and a beard and stylish cut, which provide further 'distraction' from any facial asymmetry.</p> <p>Most of the time, he doesn't care, but for interviews, etc. he puts on a 'game face', </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667307 Thu, 26 May 2016 01:56:53 +0000 Runs With Scissors 1667307@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am also very nearsighted (I wear contacts but uncorrected I can't read the "big E" on the eye chart), and was born with pretty severe strabismus (I had surgery at 14 months: &nbsp;before that I was straight-up cross-eyed.) &nbsp;When I'm tired, one of my eyes can go all lazy and roll up a bit. &nbsp; </p> <p>So, anyhow, all that to preface my initial reaction, which is -- screw anyone who can't handle your eyes the way they are. &nbsp;That said, I've had to get my first pair of reading glasses recently, and I'm actually having fun with them. &nbsp;And, I do agree with what others have said -- it can be easier to just blend in. &nbsp; So maybe give it a try, and if you have fun with glasses, why not? &nbsp; With no need for expensive prescription lenses to put in them, the cost of having a small wardrobe of "statement specs" would be minimal!</p> <p>PS -- I wish I had the pic of me at my first birthday handy. &nbsp;My parents gave me a jar of peanut butter instead of a cake for some reason, and I'm sitting there in my highchair with my spoon at the ready ... and looking *insanely* cross-eyed. &nbsp;(Not long after this in the family photo album comes the "pirate baby" series: I had to wear an eye patch for a while after the surgery.) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667306 Thu, 26 May 2016 01:55:24 +0000 BrieN 1667306@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Looking at your face shape I bet you look great in a lot of different style glasses and with those cheekbones and that mega-watt smile, wow. </p> <p>Let us know if you decide to give it a try - hoping you'll post some photos!!! &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667302 Thu, 26 May 2016 01:34:16 +0000 Anonymous 1667302@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You are a beautiful woman, but it would not hurt to have some specs for when you feel better to have them for distraction.<br /> I do something similar to cover my eyes when for a couple weeks or more each year when they look red and crusted due to seasonal allergies. I wear light sunglasses indoors. Sometimes people will ask about it and I take the glasses off. I think they are relived when I put them back on. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667249 Wed, 25 May 2016 23:25:15 +0000 RobinF 1667249@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Well that's discouraging! I would definitely give it a try. It could be a fun fashion accessory and shouldn't be too expensive since they would be clear. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667209 Wed, 25 May 2016 22:10:21 +0000 cobaltblue 1667209@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ok, I am on my phone but will post a more complete response to each of you this evening, but thank you all! I think I will make it my challenge while I'm home this month to find a great pair of specs. I appreciate your kind words and encouragement - I have a pretty thick skin overall, but for some reason I'm sensitive about the topic. There is a great optical shop in town - maybe I can go tomorrow. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667181 Wed, 25 May 2016 21:22:08 +0000 Angie 1667181@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I echo Suz. Your eyes are gorgeous and I'm sorry that you've had trouble with them, Becky.</p> <p>I would give a pair of fun specs a go. Test the waters in work settings and take it from there. Leave off the specs when with those who are familiar with your challenge. </p> <p>Keep us posted and lets help you get fun specs!&nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667176 Wed, 25 May 2016 21:10:52 +0000 Suz 1667176@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Becky, thank you for sharing this. Your eyes are beautiful and it's a shame you've had so much difficulty with this.&nbsp;</p> <p>If you feel that it would give you more confidence and put others at ease, then I think specs would be a fun fashion accessory! As others have said, they would not be heavy (oh, how I empathize with that push-em-up-the-nose story!!) and you could get a few fun frames. You wouldn't have to wear at home or with close friends who know the situation.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667170 Wed, 25 May 2016 21:01:53 +0000 Ledonna N. 1667170@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wow, Thank you for sharing something so personnel.&nbsp; I read your full post and it must be kind of disheartening having to go through that. Well there is also a gentleman in our office that just so happens to have the same<br /> strabismus</p> <p>and he wears fashion glasses.&nbsp; Non prescriptions lenses that helps make him feel more comfortable.&nbsp; Unfortunately he does not like taking pictures but he is very dapper because I told him so.&nbsp; Among the land of I.T.where direct eye contact seems necessary He says that his glasses are a distraction and in a good way.&nbsp; Instead of people focusing on his eye they focus on the stylishness of the glasses.&nbsp; I hope this helps.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667169 Wed, 25 May 2016 21:01:08 +0000 JAileen 1667169@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I had eye surgery, too. I'm very glad to be free of my heavy glasses! If it made you feel better to wear non-prescription glasses then I think there's no harm. They would be lightweight, too. With my prescription I had to get small glasses. With no prescription you could get any size. And as Kookaburra said you could have several pairs for variety. If you are trying to disguise your eyes, would a slight tint be helpful? Not as dark as sunglasses, I mean. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667158 Wed, 25 May 2016 20:43:18 +0000 Kookaburra 1667158@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sorry you've had so much to deal with concerning your eyes - just not fair! Having said that - I think a nice pair of glasses often make any face look more interesting. I love people with glasses. And given you won't be paying for the expensive corrective lenses, you can have quite a few, in different colours to match different outfits. </p> <p>Actually I'll tell you a story. There was a guy in our office in another city whom I always thought quite good-looking and stylish. He always wore heavy-frames glasses, which suited his face. Then he had LASIK surgery and turns up without glasses. And you know what? He looked overweight. Turns out the heavy glasses used to balance out his (body) frame and made everything look nice and in proportion. Without the glasses, he looked too plump. I never changed my view on this. Some people just look better with glasses </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/specs-or-being-comfortable-in-my-own-face#post-1667147 Wed, 25 May 2016 19:50:50 +0000 cobaltblue 1667147@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Long preamble. Feel free to skip down!</p> <p>Growing up I had TERRIBLE vision plus fairly severe astigmatism and strabismus (often imprecisely called a lazy eye). I wore thick (nerdy!) glasses and couldn't be without them for a moment. They invariably slid down my nose.</p> <p>After college, I had laser eye surgery that corrected my nearsightedness and astigmatism. I could finally see without my glasses. And nothing sliding down my nose! (Writing this is giving me a strong sensation of needing to push up phantom glasses.)</p> <p>The issue is that the laser surgery did nothing for the strabismus (nor was it supposed to), and the lack of specs to hide behind makes the issue much more apparent to others. I can focus/ look out of either eye but not both at once, and the resting eye tends to drift off to the side. When I meet new people, the new person invariably looks over his or her shoulder to see what I'm looking at because it's impossible to tell that I'm looking right at her/him. After initial meetings/handshake type situations, I rarely try to engage in direct or sustained eye contact - just too uncomfortable for my partner in conversation. Teaching can be a problem for the first few days of class before I know students' names as they can't tell which person I'm addressing, but that's another story!</p> <p>If you've made it this far, I think you'll have a good grasp of the question before me here.</p> <p>Short Version:</p> <p>A (very direct) friend suggested that if my eye problem and the resulting social awkwardness bothers me, I should choose and wear some great specs with clear lenses to camoflage my strabismus. </p> <p>What do you think? Usually I don't even think about my eyes, but now that I'm back in school and meeting new people, attending conferences, etc., I have been realizing how unnerving people can find it to talk with me. All the networking events and professional development workshops I've attended stress the importance of eye contact, and I just can't do it! Maybe a little distraction with fancy specs would help? Or maybe just lipstick on a pig? I'd be interested to hear any advice or thoughts you all have as this is a wise community.</p> <p>I've included a few pictures that sort of show the issue. And a close up of the eyes - no makeup today - yikes!! The problem is much more apparent in person and in non-staged photos.</p> <p>Edit: Just realized that in the middle photo I have unfocused/sort of crossed my eyes to make them look more normal. That trick sort of works for selfies but is quite unsustainable! </p>