https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2 Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Thu, 16 Apr 2026 17:18:43 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2/page/2#post-2063595 Tue, 24 Sep 2019 13:58:25 +0000 Anonymous 2063595@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Anchie, I empathize. Pants are the hardest things to fit with weight change. After I lost a bunch of weight, pants tended to bag in back horribly. Alterations did not help. I still have not replaced most pants because of fit problems. Most success was in heavy knit Ponte pants. I found some at Chico’s that fit in the smallest size then and bought 3 pair in different dark neutrals. Another pant that worked was Eileen Fisher Ponte and her signature fabric. The extra fabric seems to fall back against the body and not look baggy. My favorite were lantern style.<br /> If you try alterations, find an excellent tailor that alters men’s pants, they seem to understand pant problems more. Ask the SA’s at Nordstrom or The Rack if any alterations people there can do the job. Then ask for that alterations person by name and get an appointment. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2/page/2#post-2063393 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 18:43:59 +0000 anchie 2063393@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I was thinking some more what to do and I think that maybe I should try to get by with what I have for now and save money for shopping in Seattle. It is only 6 weeks away. I could do some kind of challenge for myself to make dressing in this period more creative and fun. For example how to wear my 5 new items differently every week.<br /> Black pants are not new, they are actually 12 years old, but never been worn - I got pregnant the same month I bought them and I never got to wear them. Kept them more for sentimental reasons, not really thinking that they will fit again </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2/page/2#post-2063302 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 11:24:39 +0000 cindysmith 2063302@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Congratulations on making it to target weight! That's a big accomplishment (one that I am totally struggling with) and I'm proud of you!</p> <p>I totally get it. I think you could probably get by for a bit (even though 3 pairs isn't much) by having a full roster of tops/blouses. People notice the tops more than the pants (I forget where I read that), so having a wide variety of tops and toppers could save you from looking repetitive. Also, scarves can make something look really different, and shoes &amp; bags help change the look up too.</p> <p>Most people are so worried about what we think of THEIR outfits or hair or whatever, that they don't notice that we only have 3 pairs of pants to go with our full rotation of tops and toppers. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2/page/2#post-2063247 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 02:51:57 +0000 rachylou 2063247@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I know this frustration. Oh, do I know it. It can take so long to rebuild. Tbh, I’d duplicate the navy to have four pairs, which is more liveable while the search continues... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2/page/2#post-2063229 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 01:49:31 +0000 Jaime 2063229@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>There is so much great advice on this thread. I do like the idea of your going to one or two shops and trying on more items - you don't yet know how everything will look on you at this weight. And shopping with Angie is the ideal solution of course! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2/page/2#post-2063225 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 01:12:10 +0000 Gigi 2063225@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm sorry to hear that you're having such a difficult time doing what should be a fun activity! It can be really hard when what you're looking for just isn't there.</p> <p>I too think it's a bear to find pants that fit. I'm struggling even with jeans, and I think pants are worse. So I can sure offer some empathy.</p> <p>It might be helpful to take some measurements so that you can get an idea of what types of bottoms will work for you. For instance, I don't look super hourglassy from the front, but I do from the side, and I have a ten-inch difference between my waist and hips. That means that most pants don't fit me, because they don't have that big of a difference between waist and hips. I go for fits labeled "curvy" here, or for fabrics that are described by the retailer as super stretchy. That helps me a lot to pinpoint items that have a high chance of working for me, especially when retailers offer measurements on their website.</p> <p>I would be patient with yourself and do what you can for now, even if it means having only a few outfits for work. You don't want to compromise. Keep shopping about, because that will give you more information about fabrics, patterns, and styles that you like or don't like. But I hear you on how tiring it can be. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2/page/2#post-2063220 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 00:50:50 +0000 Anonymous 2063220@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Same boat, though mine is weight fluctuations, not loss. Ponte is my friend this year, and so are skirts and dresses! I know it doesn't help the immediate issue, but wondering if a big once a year shop is better, as far as getting colors you want. Right now my colors are in season, and there's winter and summer appropriate things in those colors. In March or so, you should see the same with your spring colors. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2/page/2#post-2063161 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 19:34:56 +0000 Sal 2063161@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You have had lots of great advice. I was going to suggest a stylist and since you are going to be in Seattle.....</p> <p>I think pants are difficult and I almost think that companies have lost the skills in how to make them. Three pairs will get you through the week in the short term - you can add interest with scarves or blouses or footwear.</p> <p>Toban and Sterling had posts about similar situations that may be with hunting down too. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063155 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 19:16:45 +0000 Angie 2063155@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I do semi-tuck, but you don't need to. They look great with these types of untucked pullovers too (my pullovers).&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063151 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 19:00:21 +0000 Carla 2063151@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Save up your $ - shopping in Seattle is pretty amazing! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063149 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 18:47:04 +0000 anchie 2063149@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes, blazer from the suit will go, hm.. You are tempting me Do you tuck sweaters in them? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063146 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 18:41:12 +0000 Angie 2063146@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>The new suit is BLUE, right?&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063135 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 17:57:44 +0000 anchie 2063135@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Angie, I was thinking about those pants, especially after seeing them on you. What is stopping me is that most of my winter blazers are patterned- plaid, tweed, flowers , and most based on black and grey so not sure how much different outfits I could get from them. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063132 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 17:51:07 +0000 Angie 2063132@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Try these:&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063130 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 17:49:44 +0000 anchie 2063130@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Grayscale - I used to have a go to brands that fit me well, but something happened there, not sure if my shape changed or they changed their cuts. I am looking for a new brand that will work for me. </p> <p>Fashinter - I did wear paper bag pants during the summer when I could tuck in the shirt or blouse, but in winter I wear sweaters exclusively and don’t like tucking them. That is limiting my options considerably at the moment. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063124 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 17:30:50 +0000 Stagiaire Fash 2063124@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Have you tried on paper bag pants? Now that you have less volume there, maybe pants that have more will work better. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063116 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 16:49:40 +0000 Greyscale 2063116@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It can be hard when you have a sudden large wardrobe hole because styles and trends go through cycles and what’s in the shops at this exact moment might not be the best match for your personal style. </p> <p>I agree with others who said you might find one store with cuts that generally fit you and focus your effort there at first. (For me this was always the Gap until their quality went downhill. Their fit models had the same curves as me.)</p> <p>Have you been taking photos when you try things on? Photos can really convince me that a new style looks good on me (or bad) even when my eye hasn’t adjusted to seeing it in the mirror yet. Like high waists. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063113 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 16:41:15 +0000 anchie 2063113@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes I have dates, hope they work for you. I have updated my Seattle conference thread in off topic with the dates </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063111 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 16:38:27 +0000 Angie 2063111@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sure! Do you have dates? Please send them. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063110 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 16:21:34 +0000 anchie 2063110@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Cardiff girl - looking forward to it already:)</p> <p>Inge - Maybe I should have been more open minded, lot of the styles I could tell from looking at the hanger that it is not what I am looking for - paper bag, pleated, very wide legs etc. I did try in COS one of those non appealing on hanger pants and was intrigued but at the end decided against it. </p> <p>SarahDB - I will go through my closet and try to build few outfits as per your very wise advice </p> <p>Angie - you words are calming. If your kind offer to meet me in Seattle still stands, maybe you can help me build one of this capsules in person? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063105 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 15:53:14 +0000 Angie 2063105@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My dear <b>Anchie</b>, this is how it goes. Lower your expectations and don’t worry! You can’t rush it, or you will end up compromising. You have to be patient with your style because you can’t buy something that isn’t there :)</p> <p>When this happens with my clients, we focus on building with a few capsules at a time. Not many outfits, but enough to get them through the work week, and a weekend. We repeat in small increments throughout the year. Relax into it. Keep on at it with a smile and try not to get frustrated. It does not help. It’s not defeat. It’s being discerning and careful. That’s how I want you to be with new purchases </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063089 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 15:11:01 +0000 SarahD8 2063089@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Archie, I sympathize so much with the frustration of the order-return cycle and feeling that there is just nothing in the shops that I want.</p> <p>My suggestion is to take a step back from shopping and really methodically assess what outfits you can make with the clothes you have that currently fit. Then you will have a better sense of what you need to add right now to get you through the next 3-6 months.</p> <p>Congratulations on reaching your goal weight! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063086 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 15:09:12 +0000 Inge 2063086@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><div>I feel your frustration Anchie, and lots of good advice already from the other ladies.</div><div>One thing you said also caught my attention: "dismissing everything based on color, feel of material <b>or shape on a hanger</b>."</div><div><br /></div><div>You know, I always find judging style and fit of trousers on a hanger extremely hard. I have to try them on before I can tell whether or not it's something I like (and if they fit right). Maybe that's the case for you as well? There might be gems waiting for you in the store but you would never be able to tell just from looking at the pants on their hangers?-)</div><div><br /></div><div>Perhaps next time you're out shopping, go to one or only a few stores and actually try on all the trousers in the store (I know, hard work and time-consuming...). Even a small difference in cut or style can make a big difference once you are wearing them.</div><div><br /></div><div>Just thinking out loud here.<br /></div> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063075 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 14:21:15 +0000 Cardiff girl 2063075@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Anchie,you are on!Next time you are coming to London let Jane and I know.<br /> In the meanwhile l would suggest taking the pressure off yourself.l know that if I feel I have to find something to wear I will never find it or I will make expensive mistakes.So step back and breathe.You have enough to dress yourself respectably each morning so that’s ok.Yes you probably could do with more for variety and laundry purposes but you can afford to take your time and not panic .I always recommend trying things on so bricks and mortar and as Jane suggested a really good,selfless friend who will be a runner for you back and forth from the changing rooms is a better way of trying on a lot of stock than mail order.<br /> Trust your instincts,you have a great appreciation of what suits you and you won’t have lost that just because you have lost weight you just need time for your mind to catch up with your body. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063071 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 14:05:12 +0000 anchie 2063071@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>L’Abelle - so much to think about. I do hope that I will be able to stay at this weight. I did loose weight before and gained it all back, so I am cautious. I think it is different this time because it is not much a strict diet like before but lifestyle change - giving up alcohol namely. All this years of my jo jo dieting I hesitated to invest in my wardrobe because I never new how long I will be at particular size, and especially when I was at the heaviest, I was hoping it is just temporary so I went with the cheapest options. So now I want to build my new wardrobe with the quality items, hoping that it will also bu further motivation to maintain this weight. But I don’t want to go crazy expensive either, just in case Maybe it could be the source of my frustration- I am not used to buying clothes in more expensive price range and I am afraid of making a costly mistake. And regarding a different silhouette- I must admit I never liked long over lean and I am happy this era is over:) I always felt like a shapeless blob in tunics and never owned any. But skirts and tailoring - all great ideas. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063069 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 13:42:38 +0000 L'Abeille 2063069@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Do you expect to be staying around this weight for a while? That would help to determine how much to invest, ie a spare transitional size wardrobe à la Toban or a larger permanent one.</p> <p>Some thoughts: Pants must for sure be the hardest item to fit through weight changes. Skirts on the other hand are much more forgiving; add a belt, maybe move a dart, and they look fine, so can work over a bigger range of weights.</p> <p>Would you consider having some of your favourite pants altered to fit you now?</p> <p>When I lost enough weight to make a difference in pants fit, it was the heighday of low rise styles, which aren't my favourite, but as the next step after mom jeans, flattered my relatively slim thighs while not caring about my waistline measurement. As I lost, though, the jeans slid down constantly and I depended heavily on belting. Since the silhouette involved longer untucked tops, the belt had to be carefully chosen not to add back more bulk right at the tummy.</p> <p>One thing that made it easier for me to keep wearing slightly too-big pants is the fact that they are largely covered by a white coat, so the baggy thigh and seat can be my little secret. This extends to duster coats and long jackets as well. That lovely blue silk coat you showed will draw attention away from the fit of your pants.</p> <p>I guess the other thing is silhouettes. I have mostly seen you in high waisted bottoms with a neatly tucked in top. Perhaps you could flex to untucked tops, tunic length tops, slim stretchy bottoms like Ponte or even elastic waist styles? This seems a shame as these are going out of favour and fashion is moving back to your preferred look, but with time more of that should reach retail giving you better choices.</p> <p>Good luck, and congratulations on the payoff for your hard work! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063068 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 13:40:20 +0000 Jane 2063068@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Of course, as and when. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063066 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 13:38:04 +0000 anchie 2063066@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jane - it will not happen before next spring most likely. We have to do one conference yearly as part of our professional development and this year I got Seattle. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063064 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 13:25:21 +0000 Jane 2063064@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sounds perfect! I would love that. Ready when you are, in all seriousness. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/shopping-frustration-2#post-2063063 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 13:16:36 +0000 NancyW 2063063@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Toban’s guidebook for wardrobe building will be a great resource for you. Also, Angie’s advice to look to the next 3-6 months could be helpful to you. The stores will refresh for the holiday season and there might be some different choices at that point. Also, if you can manage it emotionally, just try on everything and see what it all looks like. There might be some surprises. </p>