https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 16 May 2026 13:06:12 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-835629 Fri, 01 Feb 2013 04:20:38 +0000 Suz 835629@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Fascinating discussion. I still need time to think through my own definition of restraint in dressing. I keep going back to the synonym "understated." To me, that's what it's all about...and that gets us into minimalist OR monochrome territory (not necessarily both) and sits a bit awkwardly with the flourishes of drama I persist in seeing in our outfits, Vix. </p> <p>Having said that...in the end, maybe the problem is that restraint -- like many other aesthetic categories -- is relative, rather than absolute. If you asked me whether Vix's outfits were relatively restrained, I would answer yes...if comparing them to , let's say, the typical Atlantic Pacific outfit. Are they restrained compared to Shevia's example? I don't think so. Are they restrained, per se? Not sure about that. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-835596 Fri, 01 Feb 2013 03:42:04 +0000 Vix 835596@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi Gaylene and Manidipa --</p> <p>Thanks to you both for adding your thoughts. </p> <p>The cultural aspect is definitely one that's so important...I always think that about color when I travel, see visitors from other cultures, or see travel photos. What is "normal" in clothing or building colors in one place is way too somber or bright/festive somewhere else.</p> <p>I know one would never see this from the personal outfits I've selected to show here, but:</p> <p>One thing that shocked me out of my black-textile-rutting several years ago was seeing the woman in my avatar. </p> <p>She was dressed in bright and light pink with gold embroidery and walking against rows of tonal tulips. Her outfit was so vivid yet so harmonious -- as well as stunning with her skin tone -- and it made me realize that color and I had a chance of getting along if I started paying attention to what I wore and how I wore it. </p> <p>Suz and I talked about this a bit in the earlier thread, but I do think for me restraint - harmony - simplicity *feels* more present when there's a long vertical line vs lots of horizontal breaks.</p> <p>Hence my ability to see the woman in my avatar and the gorgeous YLF member outfits above as restrained whether they are neutrals or printed. When the printed item is worn WITH a long column of solid color or AS a long column with low-contrast + minimal extra pieces, it feels pretty calm.</p> <p>[Horizontal breaks create a very dynamic energy, and it's not that I don't like them! I prefer them on others but do wear them myself now and then.]</p> <p>Just one perspective. Even if you disagree with my rationale I'd love to see photos that might work with the vibe.... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834616 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 16:32:23 +0000 ManidipaM 834616@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hmm, I'll be an outlier and say I'm torn!</p> <p>I really liked and agreed with Gaylene's examples from Angie's blog. And it may be my cultural standus loci that accustoms me to seeing a lot more going on typically, on the average woman around me, than you ladies do --- but I actually would call most of Vix's own examples as restrained, or at least as far as I can see 'restrained' getting without requiring tremendous force of personality to pull off its simplicity and minimalism. Especially if you agree that minimal is not the same as restrained. Any simpler and I'd suspect we're getting into minimal territory as well.</p> <p>Where I do disagree, personally, is with the images where there are more heightened contrasts of colour or texture. I'm not saying that restraint is necessarily muted or monochrome, but I guess I sort of expect it to be mostly lower contrast and/or lower complexity. To me, this rules out Shannon's and Day Vies' outfits as being more dramatic; possibly also Elizabeth and Carol. I'm torn on Mo's especially --- her contrast is high, but her accessorization and overall styling reads as restrained to my eye. This happens to image 3 in Gaylene's example as well. Caro's outfit, though, while colourful is harmonious enough in its colours to qualify for my idea of restraint.</p> <p>Shevia's last example is interesting to me for a different reason --- I saw her other outfit, from Vix's example, as restrained too, but of course her own contribution is more so! Bringing us back to: 'restraint is in the eye of the beholder'! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834577 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 16:15:06 +0000 Gaylene 834577@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>While I think that viewing a particular outfit as "restrained" is definitely subjective, I'm not so convinced that the concept of a restrained style is anymore subjective than the concept of a RATE style, or a classic style, or a modern style--or any of the other words that we use to describe our style goals.</p> <p>Personally I think one of the reasons "restrained style" is so slippery is because it is the opposite of how most of us view fashion. I've been trying to think of what term would represent the opposite of "restrained" and the best I've come up with is the word "fashion forward". To me, someone who chooses to adopt a restrained style also chooses to forgo much of what is trendy, novel, and currently fashionable. That sets up the possibility of looking frumpy and dated, but it also can free one to dressing only in those silhouettes, styles, and accessories in which the person feels balanced, cool, and in charge of her wardrobe. That requires a good deal of confidence, self-awareness, and knowledge to step away from what makes fashion so interesting and exciting for most of us. Restrained dressing is more about the person taking centre stage instead of the outfit--the attractiveness of the outfit comes from the person, not the garments. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834488 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 15:16:40 +0000 Vix 834488@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi again; thanks for the continued Eye of the Beholder discussion! </p> <p>The problem I'm having -- and the other thread had a bit of the same issue -- is that I <strong>DON'T </strong> think restrained needs to be:</p> <p>-- limited to purely monochromatic neutrals minus print or interesting accessories<br /> -- something that reads wallflower, assassin, waitstaff (invisible)<br /> -- restricted to certain styles: to me one can do restrained RATE, minimalist, dramatic, maximalist, sexbomb<br /> -- tailored</p> <p>I just think it has to have a lot of innate harmony and harmony with the wearer's body type and coloring...and that can read as novel, exuberant, or striking...but in an integrated way. </p> <p>So to me it's not about the parts, it's about the sum of the parts.</p> <p>It's also about choice...about choosing the shoe that disappears in the outfit if you want to wear a bold scarf/belt/piece of jewelry, or choosing the cobalt shoe if the rest of the background is quiet.</p> <p>I knew selecting some of the outfits with bolder prints as examples would be polarizing, but to me there's an innate visual peacefulness in them due to the limited palette and number of items.</p> <p>Gaylene --</p> <p>I'm glad you weighed in as I was/am getting stuck in a loop of inarticulateness (despite Ms Zap's comment).</p> <p>Shevia -- </p> <p>As you can probably tell, I'll stand by your other outfit as restrained by my definition. I feel bad saying it but the new one feels just a *bit* too plain to me -- slightly unfinished -- unobtrusive -- not telling a story. </p> <p>Mo --</p> <p>Help a woman out...where are you with your extra outfit examples? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834351 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 12:12:02 +0000 Jaime 834351@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Interesting! I am not sure if restrained style must be muted, and in some ways I think of it as restrained in style details as Gaylene suggests. I would not describe the outfit of mine that Vix posted above as restrained. Instead, I think I would pick this, but I feel restrained should be more tailored somehow. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834317 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 07:38:29 +0000 cciele 834317@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>"Restraint" is definitely subjective and eye of the beholder, for sure. All I can say is I think many of my clothes, although mostly understated color- and pattern-wise, aren't really restrained because they have details that can be considered outrageous and overtly sexy and rely on novelty. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834260 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 05:48:58 +0000 Gaylene 834260@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This is such an interesting thread, Vix. And the comments really demonstrate how hard it is to nail down these aesthetic labels because they are so subjective. For what it's worth, here's my thoughts on some of the characteristics that define "restrained dressing" for me:</p> <p>A restrained outfit is understated and subtle, not excessively showy or ornate. The fabrics are not too brightly coloured or decorated and patterns, if present, are subtle and muted. The goal is a quiet sophistication that is polished, balanced, and cool, but never pretentious, outrageous, or overtly sexy. A restrained outfit achieves its interest through subtle changes in texture, shape, and nuance instead of the stimulus of color and novelty.</p> <p>Since muted colors are one of the hallmarks of restrained dressing, Angie's recent blog on using black, white, and blue has some interesting examples of what is, and what isn't, restrained dressing to my eye. I'd classify images 2 and 3 as examples of restrained dressing but not images 1 and 4. To me the novelty of the shapes and the way the items are styled in 1 and 4 have a studied "fashion forward" look that seems at odds with a restrained style. On the other hand, the muted pattern of 2 seems subtle enough to make it fall within my definition of restraint. Outfit 3, to my eye, seems to reference most of the characteristics of my definition; even though it uses high contrast, the overall effect is polished, balanced, and cool as opposed to being novel or attention-grabbing.</p> <p>I'll be fascinated to hear what others think. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834159 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 03:46:57 +0000 Vix 834159@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Loving the discussion, thanks!</p> <p>One of the reasons I was drawn to the original thread was that we have a lot of looks on the forum that are very layered (with clothing and/or accessories), pattern-mixed, and/or high contrast. </p> <p>I enjoy looking at them, and sometimes even playing in that space, but connect more strongly with looks that have less going on.</p> <p>But then that puts us all in the go-round with what is minimalist (avant garde, only neutrals, single layer?), modern classic/classic, dramatic, etc.</p> <p>I thought this was the best shot at getting simpler-but-not-simple outfits in one place. Overly optimistic?!</p> <p>Angie --</p> <p>My legs are a bit short for my height but wearing 2.5" heels with skirts and ~ 3" ones with these pants -- and keeping shoes/stockings low or no contrast + usually wearing my tops at high hip -- catches me up or swings me a little towards leggy. No photo elongation, just a bit of illusion. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834151 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 03:31:42 +0000 Anonymous 834151@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi Vix , you are always so eloquent and detailed on your posts, you are quite a joy to read. As far as the outfits posted, I do disagree to some extent as far as the exemplifications of restraint and restrained dressing that you have provided. I agree with you in the sense that all of the examples provided have an element of restraint. However, that does not mean that the overall outfit is restrained.</p> <p>Even the most " successful" maximal dresser has a measure of restraint. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834146 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 03:25:11 +0000 Suz 834146@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Okay. So if restraint rules out bold colour or colour contrast, then agreed, Angie - none of the outfits except perhaps Beth Ann's (killer!) outfit would qualify. And maybe not even that one for the accessories. </p> <p>I like the word "refined" that Beth Ann chose to describe Vix's outfits. That is perfect, and I would certainly agree with that. But refined can be dramatic and eclectic, which I think your outfits are, Vix. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834136 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 03:11:00 +0000 Beth Ann 834136@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Vix, this is a fascinating thread, and your outfits are gorgeous and refined.</p> <p>No one would ever accuse me of being a restrained dresser. I am drawn to strong color, in part because I also feel I'm dialing it back as creative type in a more conventional environment. I guess my clothes can be a little LOUD when I feel I can't be. Since I trained to be, well, literally LOUD as a profession, that's progress!</p> <p>Still, I want to create a warm, vibrant, presence that invites others to open up and engage, not one that draws all the attention in the room.</p> <p>Here is my one, solitary contribution. Simple booties. Bootcuts. White Hanes tee, black jacket. My two indulgences? Curly hair and a gunmetal necklace. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834114 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 02:51:56 +0000 Angie 834114@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think it's very clear that Restrained Style is in the eye of the beholder :)</p> <p>FWIW, I wouldn't call any of the outfits posted so far restrained. Too many layers or contrast or accessories or bold colour. </p> <p>Vix, did I dream this up or have you mentioned in the past that you have short legs? Your outfits do not depict this at all - unless the photos are elongated, which can happen with photo transfer and camera angles. You have really long legs in these lovely outfits </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834103 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 02:45:18 +0000 Vix 834103@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>xposted with both of you</p> <p>Hi Mo --</p> <p>To me, you're absolutely on the same page. </p> <p>I have to apologize because I was searching for that teal (?) blouson dress of yours or one of your more casual looks with jeans/pants and gave up when my time ran out. I'd love it if you could include a few more of your outfits.</p> <p>Suz -- </p> <p>Hey, I'm right there with you but since I started the thread and am hoping to get more photos here I have to come with a point of view, ha.</p> <p>Glad I finally got around to snapping the blue/grey/taupe leopard print since you've put me to shame with all your variations. As you know I'm not much for crispy blouses but I do love this silk button up and have been wearing it often. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834099 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 02:42:29 +0000 Mo 834099@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thx, Suz, but are we still confused lol?! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834097 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 02:41:00 +0000 Suz 834097@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Now there you go - I think Mo's berry dress is for sure restrained style. Or is that just minimalist style? (Either way, I like it, Mo!) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834092 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 02:38:45 +0000 Mo 834092@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Not sure I'm on the same page, but I usually only wear one color with a neutral or two, rarely layers, and one select piece of jewelry.<br /> So if I am to understand this, even my berry dress could be restrained style? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834089 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 02:34:21 +0000 Suz 834089@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hmmm. So interesting. Do I agree with these examples, or not? </p> <p>I think I need to think some more about restraint!! </p> <p>I do think these all qualify in some way as simple outfits. Not minimalistic, exactly, but streamlined in the sense of no unnecessary embellishment. Well edited, perhaps. Is that the same as restraint? I just don't know. </p> <p>Great food for thought. And thank you for that info...Oh, I wish I had easier access to AT, too...though it is better than it once was, at least, with a store now in Toronto....BTW, I LOVE "our" leopard print shirt. So glad I sprung for that one. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834067 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 02:13:52 +0000 Vix 834067@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi all! First, many thanks for the kind words. Even if they don't read as RS to you I certainly appreciate the compliments and don't mind hearing the disagreement.</p> <p>I *believe* Gaylene and I (and others? maybe!) share a belief that restrained doesn't mean lack of color-color or prints/patterns or detail -- other forum members interpret it differently. </p> <p>I know in the prior thread we had lots of interesting back and forth about the difference between "restrained" and "minimalist" as well as other nuances. IIRC all we collectively agreed upon was that in the end, it was subjective. </p> <p>I for one flipped and flopped mightily depending on who was posting what. ;)</p> <p>In the earlier thread, Jeneva said:<br /> <strong>&gt; More than three pieces and I start to lose my bearings on whether I like something or not. I don't think that my outfits always qualify as simple (eeeerrrr, violet draped dress, blush moto, black lace leggings...studded flats. yeah), but maybe this fear of complexity comes through in my dressing. I like strong, simple statements - that's just my personality.</strong></p> <p>To me the notion of a limited number of pieces and/or colors is an important part of RS. [And why I can't bring myself to dress that way all the time.] </p> <p>One *can* add more items or colors, but doesn't. </p> <p>I don't think there's a magic number of items or colors or anything, and I think something like an armful of bangles can read as a single accessory if the bangles are low-contrast, but overall it's not this + that + those + these + + + +.</p> <p>So with that said, I will possibly REALLY stir up controversy by posting some YLF looks that I consider restrained! Some are from posters above who will probably disagree. [Most are from this week because of my bad short-term memory...not meaning to exclude.]</p> <p><strong>**Dramatic and/or trendy silhouette but limited color palette and # of pieces**</strong></p> <p>1-2, CocoLion.<br /> 3, Shevia </p> <p><strong>**Limited palette and pieces as well as limited but high-impact accessorizing**</strong><br /> 4, Day Vies<br /> 5, Elizabeth P.<br /> 6, Carole</p> <p><strong>**Single high-impact print, but limited/harmonzing palette and small # of pieces**</strong><br /> 7, Transcona Shannon<br /> 8, Deborah<br /> 9, Caro</p> <p>ps Suz, that's an Ann Taylor suit. I replaced my black dress pants this fall and lucked out recently when the matching blazer was on deep discount. Glad you like the grey dress...my most recent custom piece (wool jersey and so comfortable).</p> <p>Shevia, glad you like #7. The jacket is c. late 90s but it was a 40s riff. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834028 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 01:36:04 +0000 Jaime 834028@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You look stunning in all of these, but I agree with the above that I am not sure if I would call them restrained. Well maybe restrained to one dramatic flourish per outfit, but I am not sure that is what is intended by Gaylene. I think these are more judicious than restrained, if that makes sense. Interested to see what others will think. I especially love #7, btw. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-834008 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 01:20:21 +0000 Suz 834008@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ditto the others. </p> <p>The backdrop is restrained....simple, beautifully cut neutrals. </p> <p>But the arty/boho/retro flourishes feel...dramatic! </p> <p>It is quiet drama. But drama, nonetheless. </p> <p>Oh- and by the way - you look gorgeous, Vix, and these are some amazing pieces! Love the grey dress...and is that a Theory suit you are wearing? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-833970 Thu, 31 Jan 2013 00:31:07 +0000 Caro in Oz 833970@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I agree with Sona some of the details in you photos don't read restrained to me - I love them but they don't read restrained. I need to think about this one. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-833919 Wed, 30 Jan 2013 23:25:46 +0000 Sona 833919@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>although I agree that these looks are restrained compared to maximal for some reason my neurons dont read them as restrained style.</p> <p>maybe because I conjure the restrainer holding off on the scarf or the jewelry and sort of reigning in more.</p> <p>I love all the looks you've posted though.</p> <p>I'm just not sure I get restrained style. waiting to hear the wsidom of the forum... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/restrained-style-the-visuals-thread-your-own-or-inspiration-shots#post-833874 Wed, 30 Jan 2013 22:45:56 +0000 Vix 833874@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><em>So I love how Gaylene's earlier thread on Restrained Style dressing took off, and she's been kind enough to let me start a spinoff thread. Check out the discussion-heavy thread here: </em><a href="http://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/is-restraint-too-hard-for-most-of-us" rel="nofollow">http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....most-of-us</a></p> <p>Whether folks are into Restrained Style (RS) full- or part-time, I thought it'd be nice to have a one-stop place for examples/further discussion.</p> <p>So please: BRING ON THE VISUALS! </p> <p>I admit this thread is selfish on two fronts:</p> <p>-- I don't pinterest etc so would love folks to post their personal or inspirational examples</p> <p>-- I *do* wear a lot of looks with a monochromatic, tonal, or very low contrast base...but they are neutrals-heavy, which actually bums me out a bit. I think restrained + lots of color-color is very intriguing and would like to see more examples.</p> <p>[I know Jeneva has posted some RS + color shots in the past.]</p> <p><strong>*************</strong></p> <p>I think/hope the below is enough to get us started, keeping in mind RS is definitely a fluidly defined one that can generate a lot of strong opinions!</p> <p>Gaylene said:</p> <p>&gt;I do see a distinction between someone who prefers a minimalist look and someone who prefers a restrained style. And, while I don't think it is as common a style preference, <strong>if a maximalist look involves layers and accessories, then a restrained maximalist might be a person who wears layers of shaded greys, with accessories in the same tones. </strong> The look wouldn't be minimalist, but would certainly be restrained when compared to the maximalist who uses multiple colours and patterns in an outfit.</p> <p>...</p> <p>&gt;<strong>I don't know if I'd call restrained "devoid" of colour, but I do agree that colour is not the dominant feature of a restrained style.</strong></p> <p>...</p> <p>&gt;It's interesting that we all have such a different idea about what would qualify as "restrained" dressing. <strong>To me, restraint does not mean invisible or unexciting or monotone; after all, who would embrace a style with those synonyms. </strong></p> <p><strong>*************</strong></p> <p>While I think RS is easy to overlay onto at least 2 of my 3 style personas (Minimalist Magpie, Contrarian Classicist, Persnickety Bohemian) I actually think YLF has some very non-classic but RS'd dressers that I want to add for discussion/inspiration.</p> <p>Below are some of my work outfits I consider RS -- others may not. Note the dark neutral overload, sigh, and please pardon the goofy scarf shot.</p> <p><strong>I'll post examples of others after I gather them, but encourage others to post photos in the meantime!</strong> </p>