https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Mon, 20 Apr 2026 10:31:09 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy/page/2#post-2061034 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 13:20:43 +0000 Helena 2061034@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>*huge gigantic hug* </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy/page/2#post-2059285 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 18:04:02 +0000 Windchime 2059285@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you, TORONTO GIRL; grief is indeed the price of love. And it’s absolutely worth it! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy/page/2#post-2058893 Sat, 07 Sep 2019 22:44:43 +0000 The Cat 2058893@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>torontogirl, wise words from your father and you. I so agree. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2058758 Sat, 07 Sep 2019 13:49:46 +0000 Helena 2058758@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am so, so sorry to hear this heartbreaking story. You've got so many words of wisdom here. My dad has a great expression (I think it's attributes to QEII) "grief is the price of love". He always adds 'and it's worth it'. My own experience of grief recently has taught me that its flipside is gratitude. I hope you and your cousin are someday comforted by the love and happy memories that make this such a heavy loss right now Xx </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2058203 Thu, 05 Sep 2019 13:01:45 +0000 Windchime 2058203@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you, everyone. I’ve stopped trying to find any reason, sense, or pattern in the death. The funeral is today in Wisconsin; I can’t go, but a lot of family and community will be there to support those who loved “Ron.” He was an amazing person who contributed a lot to anything with which he was involved, and he will be sorely missed. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2057343 Mon, 02 Sep 2019 04:34:34 +0000 Anonymous 2057343@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you, suntiger, he was on his flight before I could tell him anything. Not that he would listen to me, a non climber. Wee children ( my toddler grandchildren) care deeply for this guy. I hope he returns safely. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2057080 Sat, 31 Aug 2019 22:30:40 +0000 cindysmith 2057080@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>(((hugs))) to you and Lydia </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056977 Sat, 31 Aug 2019 05:01:30 +0000 Barbara Diane 2056977@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am so sorry. Unfortunately, life is not fair, although we try to make it so.<br />Marilyn, sorry for your loss also.&nbsp;<br />MsMaven, sorry also to hear about your son. I'm going to make note of that book.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056789 Fri, 30 Aug 2019 12:21:46 +0000 RobinF 2056789@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh no, that is so sad. These tragedies never make sense. I always feel like they should but of course they don't. So sorry for her and you all. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056735 Fri, 30 Aug 2019 03:47:04 +0000 NancyW 2056735@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><div>I am so sorry for the shocking loss to your cousin and your family. <br /></div><div>My own experience is that every tragic event and every loss that is close to me brings an echo of my own past losses and knowledge that there will be grief and loss in the future too. I have also found that when I am not among the "chief mourners", I<br /> worry that own feelings are larger and more powerful than they somehow<br /> should be and that I am being too dramatic. You are right, it is not a balanced or fair world. It is painful to be reminded of that, especially as, I suspect, you try to act in your own life in ways that reflect your values and show fairness. Our own emotions can surprise us, but you can plan your actions. Your cousin may want a shoulder to cry on and chances to reminisce about her happy marriage - and if you can do this with her in 30, or 60, or 90 days then you will be giving a gift to both of you.&nbsp; <br /></div> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056700 Thu, 29 Aug 2019 23:17:25 +0000 Eliza 2056700@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>So sorry to hear of this loss to Lydia and your entire family. Sometimes life throws out the hard stuff in the most unexpectedly painful ways. At times like this, I try to remind myself of the power of being there, bearing witness to the grief and listening to whatever needs to be said. I think we can underestimate what it means to those who are most distressed; they don't expect a fix, but compassion and presence goes a long way. I hope all who are grieving now have that. Good that both he and Lydia experienced their love.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056689 Thu, 29 Aug 2019 22:19:31 +0000 Windchime 2056689@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>ALEXANDRA, your perspective is absolutely right. I think those two had a more genuine experience of love in the few years they knew each other than done couples ever do. That is indeed a huge win in life! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056688 Thu, 29 Aug 2019 22:15:51 +0000 Alexandra 2056688@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I don’t mean to minimize the sadness, but maybe look at it from a different point of view - this is how my husband and I look at things, knowing he may not return from the next deployment: They both loved and were loved in return, for several years. That is a huge win in life. Even if it was cut shorter than expected (or hoped for), that’s a lot of happy days together. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056644 Thu, 29 Aug 2019 18:22:09 +0000 Cardiff girl 2056644@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I’m so sorry to hear this Windchime.Much love to you and your family as you try and come to terms with what’s happened. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056643 Thu, 29 Aug 2019 18:20:25 +0000 Anonymous 2056643@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm so sorry- how awful! Poor Lydia :(<br /> @Joy tell him to Get The Sherpas! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056510 Thu, 29 Aug 2019 05:49:56 +0000 Anonymous 2056510@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My heart goes out to your family and Lydia. She will need lots of help and support in the coming year. The paperwork alone is huge. Maybe she would like to get away from the place they had together. Invite her for a visit. My son and his wife have a good friend whose passion is mountain climbing. He is recently married and his sweet wife will be staying with them while he leaves tomorrow to fly to Nepal to climb some major Himalayan peaks. I do not have good feelings about this. He plans on doing this alone without Sherpas to assist. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056508 Thu, 29 Aug 2019 03:58:10 +0000 Suz 2056508@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What a terrible thing -- I'm so sorry for your husband's cousin and for your whole family. It is so difficult to process this kind of loss and when death comes suddenly it is always a shock to the system -- not just the principal griever's system but the whole extended family system. You are a loving family member and on some level this love with transmit itself to those in your circle.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056506 Thu, 29 Aug 2019 03:12:49 +0000 MsMaven 2056506@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>So sorry to learn of such a devastating loss.</p> <p>As I read this my thoughts turned to Elaine Pagels' memoir,&nbsp;<i>Why Religion: A Personal Story.</p> <p></i>I wouldn't suggest this for anyone who has recently lost a spouse or family member. Just something to keep in mind when the time is right. Pagels' husband died in a hiking fall. I found her story so helpful for me in dealing with the sudden death of my son 15 years ago. Over the years I've read all of Pagels' books, but this is the first time she has written anything personal.&nbsp;<br /><i><br /></i><i></i>I post this not to suggest that religious faith is the answer for everyone dealing with loss, and I long ago abandoned the religion I was raised in, but I found her story immensely comforting for me.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056485 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 23:29:22 +0000 Windchime 2056485@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>SAL, yes, she will always have her memories of loving and being loved by her husband. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056477 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 23:02:02 +0000 Sal 2056477@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am so sorry to hear that Windchime, it is indeed a tragedy.&nbsp; My best wishes to you all.&nbsp;&nbsp;</p> <p>It is good that she had a lovely husband and a wonderful relationship so I hope some happy memories help during the tough times. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056468 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 22:25:35 +0000 taylor 2056468@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>So sorry to hear this! Life is so unpredictable. Hold loved ones near ! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056457 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 21:27:17 +0000 nemosmom 2056457@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>How incredibly horrible and sad My heart and thoughts go out to you and your extended family, and of course Lydia. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056456 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 21:27:13 +0000 The Cat 2056456@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My heart goes out to Lydia and you and your extended family.<br /> There is no reason for tragic deaths like this--it is just as the Bible says, " Unexpected events overtake them all." (Ecclesiastes 9:11) However, the Bible promises a bright future, where death will be no more, and where those we have lost in death will return to a happy life in paradise on earth. (Revelation 21:3-5) These promises have brought great comfort to millions of people.<br /> If you want to know more about the Bible hope for the dead, you are welcome to PM me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056455 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 21:19:40 +0000 Echo 2056455@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, I am so, so sorry. This is heartbreaking. She will be in my thoughts, and I wish the entire family the strength to pull together and persevere. Life can be truly atrocious to those who deserve it least. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056445 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 20:04:04 +0000 Anonymous 2056445@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What a terrible thing. &nbsp;And even if we understood why, it wouldn't make us feel any better. &nbsp;My heart goes out to Lydia and her loved ones. &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056440 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 19:52:51 +0000 Angie 2056440@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Absolutely devastatingly sad. There are no words or logic. Life can be awfully unfair and cruel. My heart goes out to Lydia and your extended family. I hope that she’s supported and cared for in the best possible way. Much love to you. Xo </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056436 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 19:39:26 +0000 Marilyn 2056436@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><div>This is so heartbreaking.&nbsp; I'm so sad for Lydia and all affected.&nbsp; As others have said, she'll need a lot of love and support from friends and family.&nbsp; Death is something I personally struggle with.....even when the person has had a long life.&nbsp; I always say things like seize the day and enjoy every day like it's your last because life is so random and you just never know.</div><div><br /></div><div>One of the best friends I've ever had died in January.&nbsp; There was a terrible double decker bus accident here in Ottawa where the top deck got crushed and he was one of 3 people who died.&nbsp; Many others had life changing injuries...amputations.&nbsp;&nbsp; 56 years old, riding the bus home from work on a Friday.&nbsp; Just one of those things you can't make sense of, you know.</div><div><br /></div><div>Hang in there, Windchime.&nbsp; (((hugs)))<br /></div> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056424 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 18:34:47 +0000 Anonymous 2056424@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>That is such a tragic story, and I sincerely hope she has the support she'll need. &nbsp;Nothing is ever fair in this world, is it? &nbsp;&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056423 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 18:28:45 +0000 rachylou 2056423@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh no. So sad. Life is bitter for the sweet. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/processing-a-tragedy#post-2056417 Wed, 28 Aug 2019 18:11:45 +0000 Style Fan 2056417@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>How awful for Lydia.&nbsp; I am so sorry.&nbsp; There are no words that can explain why this happened.&nbsp; Very sad. </p>