https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Mon, 13 Apr 2026 17:46:47 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice/page/2#post-2008475 Fri, 01 Mar 2019 04:00:28 +0000 Gigi 2008475@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>"Pickle juice"...very clever! I understand completely what you're talking about. We're not unaffected by our environment. It can be emotionally draining to be constantly aware of the fact that you are different.</p> <p>Others have some really good advice. My only suggestion would be to take to heart the comment from your coworkers that they actually enjoy seeing someone look different (it appears that that was one of the comments--not only is it OK, but it is appreciated by some of them). So maybe when you're putting together an outfit, remember that some of your coworkers are actually going to appreciate it; you'll be bringing joy to someone's day.</p> <p>Your outfits look great. I love how the jewelry elevates the look. The white booties are awesome.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice/page/2#post-2008315 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 23:12:09 +0000 Angie 2008315@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>Jenava</b>! You need flatter white boots, dear girl. That's all. Keep the heels for date night.&nbsp;</p> <p>All looks you posted are FABULOUS.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2008310 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 22:58:25 +0000 Jenava 2008310@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Rachey, those boots with ANYTHING, because they are amazballs. But I haven't worn them yet because I have to walk as part of my commute, plus heels that high in this office is a little questionable, although I think in the right outfit they'd be fine.</p> <p>But you are most certainly on to something with the high low idea. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2008304 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 22:46:55 +0000 rachylou 2008304@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I love that green cardigan! Looking at the pics, including the white boots Find... it occurs to me ‘high low’ could be a touch phrase... the white boots with a fancier jacket and jeans. A tee to dress down suiting type stuff... I do that a lot with my suits, wear a muscle tee... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2008294 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 22:25:33 +0000 Jenava 2008294@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks again everyone!  100% to so much of this.  Yes, I'm a girl and that alone makes me stand out.  Layering a very different dressing norm over that just doesn't feel like "me".  I don't want to wear my leggings and tunic nursing tops to work, that would most definitely not feel like me!</p> <p>Angie, I'm struggling because I'm dying to wear my white booties but suddenly they seem to be for my fantasy life.  )-;</p> <p>I most definitely would benefit from photos and an "outfit debrief" because my mom brain can't contain these learnings quite yet.  </p> <p>I'm also trying to find ways to dress down (or dress up) items so that I feel like me but don't feel sloppy.  Other things that are cricital:  I need to feel MODERN, I feel rather silly in very classic or preppy styles.  It's funny, I don't mind dressing a little weird (for lack of a better descriptor coming to mind ATM) but I don't want to dress UP.  I think my colleagues would "get" weird before they'd get dressy, if that makes sense.  And in that regard I think I'm lucky.</p> <p>I also have to wear clothes that are breastfeeding/pumping friendly, on top of it all!  LOL...JEEEZ.</p> <p>Below are a couple recent outfits.  Not great, but I'm trying.  I want to wear interesting outfits but I have so many constraints that I just give up.   Yes, uniform dressing seems like a perfectly practical solution but it makes me absolutely CRINGE to think about it....I think I would get truly bored with my style (even though frankly what I end up wearing after FAR TOO MUCH thinking about it is essentially the same uniform).</p> <p>Edited to add one more photo from today. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2008011 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 14:39:13 +0000 lyn67 2008011@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Just don't rush to solve but give you some time and will all set in. You have (always had) a&nbsp; great style- but new circumstances need to settle first.&nbsp;&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2008010 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 14:38:57 +0000 Carla 2008010@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>DonnaF articulated my thoughts exactly - as a woman amongst a workforce of mostly men, you are already a unicorn. I like your description of your column of colour outfit with flat footwear and gold accessories. Regarding the Emerald suit - maybe wear it as separates first, before wearing it as a matching outfit, so it won't be such a 'shock' to your (male) co-workers! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007948 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 12:35:20 +0000 Bijou 2007948@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Be You, because that person is fabulous. We all have a more casual me and a dressy me - but being true to yourself and your style is important. I know when I became a mother, it was even more important than ever before that I felt like 'me' at work, because this was the place where I was valued for the contribution that I brought to the table and not as someones wife or mother.</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007943 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 11:44:35 +0000 LaPed 2007943@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, I get this. I work with children, and the MO for many of my colleagues is "something that won't stain/rip easily". I think the trick is to find a casual version of yourself and, as you say, maybe aim for one degree dressier than your colleagues, rather than three. What makes this tricky is that right now, on your weekends, you're probably in mom-wear that you don't want to bring anywhere near your workplace! Maybe as you're settling into Baby #2, give yourself permission to do a wardrobe refresh, focusing on pieces that will "dress down" your current workwear while still feeling authentic to you. Great jeans and t-shirts to pair with sharp toppers, a denim jacket for skirts/dresses, stompy boots or the perfect sneakers, etc. The bonus will be that all of these can transition seamlessly into weekend/afternoon wear. I remember loving to death the first pair of well-fitting jeans that I added to my wardrobe after DS was born. It was such a relief to get out of maternity wear and yoga pants. :)</p> <p>Two young kids, a new job, and an hour-long commute just boggles my mind. What you're doing is super-human so I wouldn't fret too much over personal style! You manage to make it out the door with a polished outfit and matching jewelry -- wow wow wow!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007916 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 10:51:04 +0000 Stagiaire Fash 2007916@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p> <div>I like your pickle juice metaphor! This is wonderful to hear <i> It's been a long journey to this point and I'm ready to focus on healing and feeling good in my skin again.</i><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>My advice: be casual your own way. It doesn't have to be jeans to be casual. Since you felt relatively put-together at home, why not wear some of those outfits? If you like dresses and skirts, try pairing one with some sneakers or stompy boots that contrast sharply with any "overdressed" vibe, or wear a breezy sundress (in a couple months). If you need something to keep warm against the AC, get a hoodie. If you like black, do a couple days in all black with subtle details. I don't know your style, so can't give specific recs, but I hope you get what I mean. <br /></div><div>I do think it's important to adapt. You want to stick out from the crowd for your work, not because you wear things that are distracting (to them) or that cause you to be distracted by the distinction. <br /></div> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007869 Thu, 28 Feb 2019 06:03:07 +0000 Gretchen 2007869@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I hear you - and agree there's a difference between dressed up and overdressed for your environment. I work in Silicon Valley and see this all the time.</p> <p>My take: figure out what makes you happiest/most You and then see how that works in a less dressy mode. Blazers w jeans, or sweaters with colored pants, or sleeveless dresses with flats. It's still you, just less formal.&nbsp;</p> <p>Good luck!</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007680 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 23:07:00 +0000 DonnaF 2007680@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jevava, remember you will always stick out in your current work environment due to your gender identity. Moreover, you have a body type that is distinctly female! Those things aren't bad, nor is possibly pushing the crowd to be more *presentable*. But as long as you are *different* you may as well be *YOU*.</p> <p>If you generally change clothes when you get home, perhaps this is an opportunity to avoid that extra step and have outfits that are easily washable and instantly kid huggable?&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007650 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 22:26:59 +0000 Angie 2007650@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>Jenava,</b>&nbsp;pull out your current favourite items, and lets make them work into casual-for-you practical outfits. We can help you with that. SHOES that go the distance are the most important part of the outfit, as is hair and clothing that works in the rain.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007572 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 20:58:38 +0000 rachylou 2007572@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ok. I really get this. Environment matters. It’s not simply what people think of me. I have a real thing about matching the architecture too. It’s crazy, but I do. Is my building a modern skyscraper? Is it an anonymous business park? A giant campus that you have to hike for meetings? I think about all these things. And then as a contractor, changing workplaces all the time... And I remember one place, before the interview, talking on the phone to set it up... and these people were insane... they sent me to interview with a guy who’s wife just had a baby. The interview was AT THE HOSPITAL! ...And he said, ‘Don’t wear a suit. We don’t wear suits.’ I love suits.</p> <p>So yes, I wore a suit to that interview... Lolol.</p> <p>All I can say is, the suit was at least oh so carefully calibrated for tech. Blue cotton with white contrast stitching. Not a bankers suit. </p> <p>I don’t have a brilliant solution, except spend money on clothes. I can only say, at least it’s sorta fun. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007529 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 20:21:44 +0000 Sal 2007529@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I have worked in corporate offices in London, Melbourne, Auckland and Manchester......&nbsp; smartly dressed offices in Auckland and my current city, smart casual in Melbourne - and my current job where I can almost where what I like (we own the business- most people wear jeans and polo shirts).</p> <p>I remember feeling inadequately dressed in my first corporate job - and my boss advising me about wearing jackets with clients etc... I had no money for clothes so there were many many repeats.&nbsp; There were lots of successful glamourous women and I felt a bit rough around the edges.</p> <p>Conversely working for a not for profit in Melbourne - I felt often a bit too dressy - and too interested in clothes.&nbsp; Most people had zero interest.....</p> <p>I do think we can be and are influenced by the norm around us - and that is fine too...</p> <p>I think workplaces have become so much more casual with less rules in place about how to dress.&nbsp; I remember my accountant friend being advised to only wear skirt suits with hosiery and closed toe shoes - no pants suits, no bare legs.&nbsp;&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007508 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 19:53:46 +0000 Christina F. 2007508@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It took me a while to find my sweet spot in my office, which skews casual (most of us except for those who meet with donors). I didn't have the extra challenge of a post-baby body to contend with as well. I think it will take time but you will figure out how to feel comfortable in your environment while dressing like you. Maybe take pictures and notes of each outfit and how it made you feel through the day? That may seem time consuming, but you could keep it brief. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007500 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 19:42:57 +0000 Suz 2007500@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This definitely applies to me...not in my "office" environment but just in my overall environment. When I live in a larger city I veer towards a dressier style; when I lived in Kingston (smaller university town) I tended to dress more casually. Partly that was practicality. Kingston's streets are always a mess and I'm always walking so that dictated very casual footwear and I'd dress bottom up.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007496 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 19:38:50 +0000 bj1111 2007496@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>you bring up an interesting point.&nbsp; it's not that you _care_ per se what the others think, but you do self-censor to come closer to the social norm.&nbsp;</p> <p>i wonder if others who work at an office that is much dressier or much more avant garde or outlandish (and also judgement-free) have felt the same.</p> <p>as if we want to be within 1 standard deviation of the sartorial mean, rather than 2 standard deviations, in either direction. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007493 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 19:34:32 +0000 Suz 2007493@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>Jeneva</b>, you have fabulous style. And I'm nodding along with the others -- you've just been through and are continuing through tumultuous times! Little ones take a lot of energy and focus, and so does a new job...and so...it's no wonder if you feel you are at a transitional point.&nbsp;</p> <p>It's true you might be wanting to adjust to meet environmental norms. You might also be responding to your needs as a new "mom on the go." At home, you might require more practicality from your clothes than in the past. Ditto for your commute.</p> <p>I do think that eventually you'll find your sweet spot. Perhaps not as dressy (for the next few years) as your previous style -- but with some "dress up" outfits for nights out (whenever those happen!) But maybe a few luxe elements that help you feel like "you." A sweater is just a sweater to some people...but if it is a beautiful Vince sweater, you'll know it. If you know what I am saying.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007460 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 18:28:59 +0000 Jenava 2007460@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've been thinking through some of your advice.&nbsp; First of all, I am so happy I posted because all of this is good food for thought!&nbsp; As far as lots of changes, these are the last of two years of upheaval and so while it might look on the outside like a lot, to me it feels like I'm finally in a place where I can re-orient.&nbsp; It's been a long journey to this point and I'm ready to focus on healing and feeling good in my skin again.</p> <p>To be clear, NO ONE has said anything derogatory.&nbsp; And yes, Shevia, what anyone wears anywhere barely registers here.&nbsp; I suspect when I wear my new emerald green suit it will register.&nbsp; haha...I guess my point was that the <i>response you get from your environment does influence how you feel about your choices</i>.</p> <p>For now, I think I'm going through an upheaval in my style.&nbsp; I used to love to be dressy and perhaps that's changing in part due to my environmental norms (I don't want to stick out too much) and my life situation, but I certainly haven't found where I'm comfortable yet!</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007176 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 04:40:33 +0000 Sal 2007176@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Congrats on the baby - and yes you will be tired and busy....I relate to some of what you say - I work with 14 males, 1/2 in jeans and a polo, and 1/2 in workshop clothes and hi-vis.&nbsp; I have to wear flat comfortable shoes - sometimes covered - and light colours are also unpractical for the somewhat dirty environment.&nbsp; I like to have footwear that I love and sunnies - and a good hairstyle - everything else doesn't matter too much.</p> <p>My suggestion is what Shevia said.&nbsp; Develop a simple uniform of pieces you like that feel like you....&nbsp; and when you feel like going for it just do so.&nbsp; If you love jackets then wear those with jeans and simple tops - or have a fab few pairs of boots that make your looks feel like you</p> <p>Sounds like an interesting busy stage of your life </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007168 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 04:23:39 +0000 taylor 2007168@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jenava, As I recall you have a fabulous dressy/edgy wardrobe . You love fashion and had joy in dressing. I hate to see that diminish in any way .</p> <p>I gave up caring a looooong time ago what people thought of my dressing up ...as they stood in judgment of me “those high heels are ruining your feet “ they would say ..<br /> All while in their dirty tennis shoes , flip flops and shorts at a company dinner party at a restaurant. </p> <p>The side eyes, raised eyebrows and rude comments come from THEIR place of insecurity , not yours ! Do not buy into it. Do not let anyone steal your joy!<br /> Wear what makes you feel good no matter what !<br /> As a busy mom of 2 , you absolutely must feed your soul ....having fun with fashion and feeling good about that ....is/was part of that .</p> <p>You used to keep a photo diary of your outfits . Would it help to go through those and pull outfits that might work for this new job ? dressed down/up or tweeked a bit ?</p> <p>And for the record .....I actually did wear a ball gown (skirt) today , dressed down with a denim /leather jacket for lunch with my hubby . </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007149 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 03:30:02 +0000 bj1111 2007149@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What kkards said. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007143 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 03:25:26 +0000 Jessikams 2007143@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Is it possible that you’re feeling a bit uncomfortable about being a visible body in public, after all that time alone with your baby? I know when I have been working from home a lot, going out into the world can feel uncomfortably exposed. I bet this feeling will pass quickly. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007091 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 01:56:24 +0000 Anonymous 2007091@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I agree with Alicewonderland! I've noticed some coworkers start adjusting up when I wear my typical dressy workwear And some don't-thats ok too.<br /> Bottom line you need to feel like you, and that maybe has changed with child #2. Do you have outfits or even single pieces or accessories right now that are perfect -not just workwear? It could even be gear or formalwear. If so, what aspect of it would you want to bring to your work? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007089 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 01:52:54 +0000 Jaime 2007089@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>First of all take a deep breath and relax. An infant plus another young child plus new team/job plus long commute plus winter - if you get through the day you have finished a marathon. I know hi-tech guys very well (am married to one and have worked with many) and I am sure they are paying far less to your outfits than you could imagine - whatever you present will be taken as a given. The frustration is there is no one to appreciate what you are wearing (but that is what the forum is for!). I suggest finding a fall back uniform and realize you can wear whatever you want on the days that you have the energy to be creative. Eventually you will find someone on your team or in the area that appreciates it! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007074 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 01:24:00 +0000 Anonymous 2007074@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You are in a tough situation. I have stopped caring about being dressier than everyone else. How about keeping the bottom half casual with jeans or casual pants and footwear and putting the effort into tops and toppers and maybe accessories that make you happy. Try denim jackets, a graphic tee with a blazer or other jscket like Suz wore today and making sure everything fits well. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007073 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 01:20:14 +0000 SarahD8 2007073@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Well...sure, we are all marinating in pickle juice, but lots of pickle jars contain more than just cucumbers. Be the peppercorn! Be the fancy-cut carrot! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007071 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 01:18:28 +0000 Alicewonderland 2007071@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>In the beginning people will notice if you dress way different, but eventually they will get used to it, and it will just become “you” and eyebrows will no longer raise. All I can say is wear what you like that makes you feel good. Other people might follow. I used to sit next to a lady at work, who wore bright sheath dresses, full makeup and eyeshadow, and heels to work with full confidence while everyone was in frumpy clothes. Eventually many of the other people around her started dressing up too, including me, if we felt like it. It was liberating. But, if one day you are not on your game, then eveone might start asking you if you are okay and if you are sick. So sometimes I guess it’s good to keep expectons low. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/pickle-juice#post-2007062 Wed, 27 Feb 2019 00:53:11 +0000 kkards 2007062@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>i'm not sure i have any advice for you....but wow....new baby &amp; new job...i can't imagine 2 more stressful events and to do both of them at the same time! i just can't even imagine...if i was in your place, i'd be happy if i actually got out of the door with clean clothes, if they actually matched that would be a plus....</p> <p> </p>