https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 02 May 2026 17:37:59 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-728498 Sun, 23 Sep 2012 00:04:37 +0000 Jonesy 728498@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krish, I'm just seeing this now. I am very moved by your post and what you have been going through. It is fascinating and terrible how our minds can play tricks on us and we can end up in a very dark, scary place. It sounds like you are on such a strong path now--I am so happy for you! I really appreciate the struggle you have been through, and it takes so much strength to share it here. </p> <p>Being healthy and vital is truly the best gift you can give to yourself and your son! I think as we get older and progress through life, we all have these "tracks" or patterns that we can fall into, when we get stressed, or too busy, or whatever. It can be so insidious! You look gloriously healthy and lovely in the current pics! Thank you for sharing what you have been going through. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-723068 Mon, 17 Sep 2012 02:14:24 +0000 velvetychocolate 723068@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You look beautiful in your photos and I just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you. I'm a bit behind on forum posts, but in the meantime - your post really made me think a lot about how easy it is to revert to old habits when under stress - just as Scarlet has so eloquently explained. I really liked how she said this doesn't mean that something's gone terribly wrong, but that it's normal and natural that we might revert to old habits/coping mechanisms when under stress. </p> <p>In the meantime, I don't know if it'll help, but here's a little story that might make it a tiny bit easier in terms of the whole eating thing...</p> <p>Last summer, my Mom had a heart attack and there was all this pressure to fix up her diet, get on an exercise program and do all this stuff...</p> <p>I went up to visit and take care of her, and I said, "Forget the diet ..." and suggested that all that she really needed to do was to ask herself, "What's the best thing I can eat right now?" </p> <p>The idea was to just simply review what she'd eaten and if it turned out she hadn't had any protein or dairy or fruit or what have you, then this might be a good thing to eat at her next meal. Instead of a "diet", it was more like, "What can I add?" </p> <p>We're talking about nourishment, taking really good care of ourselves - not a "diet" and not some weird strict thing. Just the question, "What's the best thing I could eat right now?" while kind of mentally reviewing the day's food so far. It'll be, "Oh, I haven't had any vegetables or fruit yet" or "I haven't had much protein" and so on. Maybe more water, or noticing that there weren't any greens or vegetables so far. Instead of what to reduce or take away, it became "What can I add?" and "What's the best thing I can eat right now?"</p> <p>This is real care-taking - looking after one's body and spirit. Being good and nice to ourselves. Some almond butter, some blueberries, getting enough water, some fish once in awhile and making sure to get enough greens. Being as good to ourselves as we are to the people we love and care about. </p> <p>I'm so glad to read that you've already turned the corner and have managed to keep some weight on. I also really admire the fact that you spoke up about this, and wanted to say that "maintenance" is no easy feat - whether it's keeping weight on or keeping it off. I am someone who has had to work hard to keep my lost weight off, and although it seems strange, I can kind of relate to the challenge of keeping it on. I guess what I'm saying is that it takes a lot of work to get to a healthier place (whether that's gaining or losing some weight), and once there - it's still a bit of a challenge to stay there, and maintain it. Even though I don't have quite the same experience as you do - I can certainly relate to the challenges of maintaining something that took a lot of work to achieve. </p> <p>So glad you're back and I think you look *fab* these days. </p> <p>Just keep on being good to yourself. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722851 Sun, 16 Sep 2012 19:28:12 +0000 Louise 722851@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Big hugs to you for your courage in posting x </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722642 Sun, 16 Sep 2012 16:34:20 +0000 catgirl 722642@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krish, thanks so much for the info - I will pass it on to my friend. And thanks for the insight on the thought process. It's easy to see how a person can fall into this way of thinking. Our weight-driven society puts us on the brink of that cliff all the time. It's really smart of you to think of yourself being fed as you would your growing child. Sometimes as a mother, I end up eating just the sandwich crusts or the leftovers on the counter instead of my own healthy meals. That fat is what's making our hair shine and our faces glow!</p> <p>And you are so right about how being slim at all costs is a price so many are willing to pay. My very best friend has a chronic, debilitating degenerative (though not terminal) disease that has disabled her and wasted her away, and people say the most thoughtless things to her, like "Wish I had that problem!" or "At least you don't have to worry about gaining weight." The sad thing is that I get where that comes from, with all we see and hear around us - it becomes an ingrained way of thinking. </p> <p>I'm so proud of you and you look stunning in your WIW on the main forum! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722485 Sun, 16 Sep 2012 11:23:52 +0000 krishnidoux 722485@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Scarlet, what you are saying comes right into my heart. So true. So true. </p> <p>OMG I am so happy that you yourself got out of this state. The underweight state seems to lead our minds to numb our normal reactions. Me too, adding fats helps. It's not always easy (because of my old ways) but one way to do it that I love is to add avocado to my veggies, a bit of butter on my pitas, eat eggs with the yolk. Before, I'd have the veggies with lemon juice, dry bread or pita if any, and egg whites only. I thought this was "healthy" and "responsible": but it was weight loss conducive above all, and in my case, not good. </p> <p>Another thing that helps me is that I am a mother, and I always fed my son quite differently than how I was feeding myself. I've always given him the full eggs, the square meals, the butter on the veggies, etc. No diet for him! Since I have started re-feeding myself, I have started to do this for me too. It has helped in moments of cooking to imagine I am cooking for another child - me - instead of cooking for me - the grown woman who "must" be on a diet. This said, I don't eat as much as a 16 yr old. I don't know if it's possible! But I eat more like him. </p> <p>Finally what also helped me put on and keep some flesh back on my bones is letting myself eat more carbs. In our society carbs are demonetized. When I was in Morocco, I remember a gym instructor telling me under her breath " the secret is couscous. Couscous and pasta. Pack up on it, and watch your body fill out nicely into curves". I didn't follow her advice right away but what she said stuck with me. Now I see it's true. </p> <p>As of fads, yes, I remember all the fads and especially when everything was labelled "light" to be sold. I was in Japan at the time and I remember reading on the products' labels "raee-to", then back in Canada, "light". And I think now the big fad is a food product that does something else than feed you, like aids digestion in a super way, or keeps your skin young, etc. So you pay lots of $$$. </p> <p>About being disappointed, yes, of course I was, but if there is something that this affliction has taught me it is humility. Constant, constant humility is the way out. Anorexia and zealous dieting makes one very arrogant. It's arrogant to think we can go against nature, control it, deny our body what it needs and still feel on top of the world. It's arrogant to think you can do it when the majority of women live with their "plump" bodies and there is a good reason for this... because to diet like crazy leads to death. Other women are not plump, they are alive. Anyway, I learned coming out of anorexia the first time around, that a good deal of humbleness was necessary. The way out is so full of set backs, you need to be humble, forgiving towards yourself, acceptant that it is not a straight road out and set backs are part of the full journey. So this time, given my previous experience, it was easier to accept, like "okay... so this could happen..." I was mostly shocked that it actually could happen. For instance as an ex-smoker, I know I would never go back to it. Not tempted, not even a little bit. I thought I was immune in the same way with anorexia but now I discovered, not so. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722438 Sun, 16 Sep 2012 04:31:25 +0000 Scarlet 722438@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krish, I think you are so right about the broken alarm. That's such a good way of putting it. Worse than that people might be asking you for your "secret". It's so bizarre in retrospect. In my case I had to buy smaller bras; my pants were hanging off me; I weighed myself in the gym and thought, oh this scale is broken, so I went to another one and thought, oh they are all broken. So weird that that was my thought process! I was so exhausted all the time and just figured I was working hard. Actually a big key for me to feeling better was adding fats back into my diet. Somehow I had bought into the hysteria about fat at the time. Remember when all the foods in the supermarket were labeled no/low-fat because fat was the latest thing that was going to kill us? I think that came right after eggs (cholesterol!) which was just after the sodium obsession. Or was this U.S. specific? These days the big evil food is sugar/carbohydrates :o) I have since decided that butter, eggs and cheese are all good for me I think more fat in my diet was really the key to more energy and feeling better for me, but I think everyone has different nutritional needs. I don't think much about that time in my life, but gosh it is weird to reflect on it. But mainly I just wanted to mention it since you have struggled with eating disorders before, that slipping into the place where you were last year doesn't necessarily mean you are faltering in your fight against the disorder. Like you observed, it is so hard to see our relationship to our body and food with clear eyes in our culture, and if you have certain tendencies anyway like a fast metabolism and being a stress non-eater as opposed to a stress-eater (or you are used to the feeling of hunger like you were conditioned to be) then I can see how you can slip into this state without it being a resurgence of your disease. I hope I am making sense. I was just thinking that in your shoes I would feel disappointed if I feared I hadn't really conquered the eating disorder like I thought I had, and I just wanted to point out that it doesn't necessarily mean you have given into the disorder, but might mean you do need to actively prioritize healthy eating especially during stressful times. I hope I am making sense. So hard to tell </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722435 Sun, 16 Sep 2012 04:27:54 +0000 Deborah 722435@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krish nothing to add just wanted to say welcome back and thank you for Shari g so openly. If I may, you are looking so much healthier and beautiful. I always thought you were gorgeous bit seeing the difference in the photos is quite remarkable. Stick with it, know that we are behind you and your honesty is such a huge encouragement to manyxxx </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722407 Sun, 16 Sep 2012 03:23:46 +0000 MNsara 722407@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krish - your WIW sent me here to catch up - and I'm SO glad you're back!! I'm also so glad you saw what was happening and actually took back control, but in a healthy, postive way!! {{{hugs}}} I'm hoping you come to LOVE these body changes because I can't believe the difference those few pounds have made in adding youth and vibrancy to your face and your whole being! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722371 Sun, 16 Sep 2012 02:06:29 +0000 krishnidoux 722371@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I appreciate your support so much. I feel even stronger. I'm so happy I posted, finally! </p> <p>JR, you are right. I will make a point to do more WIW. It's also good for me to look at pics of me. I usually not take pictures of myself, so throughout the years, may have carried a wrong mental image. On the pics here, I can see I am not at all fat, even if I feel so large. I can see my body is starting to re-proportion itself out, even if inside myself it feels like everything is inflated out of proportion. Thank you for your encouragement and virtual hugs!</p> <p>Claire, yes, the redistribution of body fat happens in a strange way, but is good in the end. First you bloat all over. Then slowly bit by bit you "appear" here and there. My stomach used to always be bloated with water. I know it sounds strange, but it was like this and low and behold, now that I fill this stomach with food, it is not a water balloon any more, and feels flatter. And it is so much more comfortable too. Thank you for your kind words.</p> <p>Scarlet, so you understand where I'm at! I think the ideal of being slim is so much drilled into our heads that when we start losing too much weight, we don't really react negatively at first. It's like a broken alarm. It takes more time to realize something is really wrong. Thank you for your kind compliments!</p> <p>Shannon, I am so very touched by your words. Many hugs to you too! I hesitated a long time before posting but I am so glad I did. I don't feel so alone! Thank you for your encouragement.</p> <p>Celia, yes, I will post more WIW. This thread has energized me in a very positive way. Thank you for your boost! Yay for the boobs. Now I must shop for bras. LOL. </p> <p>LadyBirdK, thank you for your great positive encouragement! How can I ever feel down after this? Thank you complete stranger! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722312 Sun, 16 Sep 2012 00:44:46 +0000 LadyBirdK 722312@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi there Krish,<br /> Congratulations on your success - you look beautiful and vibrant and sensual, even if you cannot yet see it. I am sure you soon will I admire your strength in "turning your mental train around." No men feat! Best wishes to you on your continuing journey. I (though a complete stranger) am so proud of you! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722232 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 22:20:10 +0000 celia 722232@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krish, you are a brave woman to have acknowledge that you needed to change something.<br /> I thought you are beautiful before but right now you look radiant and very hot(yay for the boobs).<br /> I am glad you are feeling better, with more energy.Let's celebrate by seing some fab WiW posts from you.</p> <p>Big hugs. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722204 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 21:28:14 +0000 Transcona Shannon 722204@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krish - I'm sitting here actually crying while I type this. Not because I am sad, but because I am so, so very happy that you are taking care of yourself and that you have the strength and courage to pull yourself out of a horrible place. You look beautiful and healthy and my wish for you is to continue on the path of caring for yourself.</p> <p>Sending you many hugs. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722185 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 20:56:08 +0000 krishnidoux 722185@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Cocolion, kudos to you! I command you for what you have done, it is so difficult. For me just quitting smoking some 17 yrs ago was something of a feat. Good for you! I adore your WIWs, I think you always have so much style and look so beautiful. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722161 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 20:22:56 +0000 CocoLion 722161@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>KD -- You look SO MUCH BETTER NOW!!! You look 10-15 years younger to start. You look like you are in your early 30s now. You are doing the right thing! I have been through my own journey of eating disorders and addictions. Up until my mid-40s, I was routinely underweight. From my early 30s through mid 40s the low weight was maintained by unhealthy habits and n@arcotic use. Finally I, like you, decided to increase my weight (and quit the drugs). I have more energy, and my complexion is better. I put all of my too small clothes in a box, I still haven't opened that box. Put your old clothes away or get rid of them is my advice.</p> <p>You look great in your bf jeans outfit! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722141 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 20:00:00 +0000 Scarlet 722141@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am so glad that you have been able to realize what is going on and are addressing it successfully. After reading this I realize I want to emphasize more how fantastic your WIW on your other thread looks. You look fantastic there, and honestly not well in the pic 4 here. I have never had an eating disorder, but I did go through a period of about a year of inadvertent weight-loss due to stress. It was so weird because I could only see it in retrospect when I got out of the unhappy situation I was in and started to gain weight again. The mind is a weird thing. I look and feel so much better with the 10+ pounds. So do you :o) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722130 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 19:51:08 +0000 Anonymous 722130@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krish, we've missed you and I'm so glad to hear that you're doing better. I don't have anything brilliant to add here, but I think you look fantastic. How wonderful that your stomach got smaller and curves were added to *all the right places*! I hope you continue to feel better and better, physically and mentally. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722125 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 19:46:34 +0000 JR 722125@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krishni, I hope we can meet some time soon so I can give you some real life hugs to go with the virtual ones. You do look so much better now and you are so wise and courageous to be tackling your issues. I think the positive reinforcement you will get from posting your WIWs will be a fantastic tool in your box to help you from slipping back into bad habits. And good for you for eating more, and better! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722112 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 19:31:27 +0000 Angie 722112@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>THAT'S what we want to hear!!! XOXOX </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-722072 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 18:37:45 +0000 krishnidoux 722072@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you! Angie, your words are a real boost to me. I am so happy you "approve" of my own way to wear the BF jeans. I saw lots around, always worn rolled. I feel so much better today. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-721896 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 14:30:19 +0000 Anonymous 721896@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am cheering on your continued recovery. You are strong, brave, and beautiful. And you are not alone. Thank you for sharing with us. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-721868 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 13:49:19 +0000 Angie 721868@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>So much wisdom and kindness from Gaylene, Suz, Michelle, Una, and Anne. So much courage from you, Krish. Many, many hugs. I have really missed you on this forum. </p> <p>I see a beautiful and stunning woman who is aware of her health concerns and THAT is most of the battle won. Your 10 pound weight gain is indeed a victory and I want to celebrate your gorgeous healthy hair, skin and new boobs with you! </p> <p>Fighting depression and angst is so very hard, but you have pulled yourself through the war inside of your head and body. Be immensely proud of yourself sweet lady. We are :)</p> <p>And we are here to encourage you whenever you feel like things are slipping, OR when you want to celebrate your victories. Like this forum thread.</p> <p>KILLER BF jeans outfit, darling! </p> <p>xoxo </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-721860 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 12:49:23 +0000 krishnidoux 721860@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>THANK YOU all so much for your support! For each of your comments, I wanted to check not just "Therapy", but also "Wisdom" and "Boost". </p> <p>Gaylene, thank you so much for giving me an outsider's feedback on the pics, it's very helpful to me. I don't always see the difference, but when I'll feel down your words will give me courage that I am going in the right direction. It's so true: we cannot see ourselves clearly through the veil of our assumptions. </p> <p>Michelle, your words are beautiful and they reach me right to the heart. I feel so much non-judgemental support! I am sure we will see each other again and that we will be able to give each other a real hug. I remember when I saw you last year my first thought was "How pretty she is!" and then my second thought was "And how stylish too!". I have lots of admiration for you, and so your support mean so much to me in this. </p> <p>Suz, we are sisters in so many ways. Anorexia is a form of depression, only expressed in this very physical way. The whole time, you think that nothing is wrong and that you are "in control" of your life... meanwhile nothing can be further from the truth. Being in control is what Gaylene says: knowing that it's impossible to have a clear idea of what we look like, impossible to be 100% in control. I can relate with your switch analogy. I knew that it could come back, but was so convinced I knew how to keep it at bay that I got distracted and it came back behind my back! Exactly the track thing you talk about. That is what happened to me. I thought I knew how to recognize the old track; but it appears I didn't! Because I slipped into it so easily. Thank you so much for your encouragement. You are so right on. I am in this no-man land zone (no-woman land rather) but I am confident I will come out of it and knowing myself, my real self, I'll be back into fashion soon enough. Thank you though for reminding me the path.</p> <p>Alaskagirl, thank you for posting too.Your support and encouragement mean a lot to me. I am so sorry for your friend and I can relate, too. Except in my case, I didn't even know eating a pizza was a struggle (my subconscious mind would find ways to avoid it without my realizing). I hope she pulls through this. She did well to start a FB page. I thought myself of starting an anonymous blog recounting my experience as I go along, but so far what stopped me is exactly this: the commitment issue. What if I failed? What if I couldn't do it? It's just so overwhelming, so I take it one day at a time. Now that I have gained and retained 10 pounds, I feel a bit more confident and the first thing to do online for me was to tell you guys where I was! </p> <p>There is a wonderful woman, Emily Troscianko, who also pulled herself out of anorexia and recounted it online through a blog (<a href="http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hunger-artist" rel="nofollow">http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hunger-artist</a>). She was followed by a medical centre and received cognitive therapy. She talks about it, her ways to beat the dark thoughts and the doubts. I think it could be helpful to your friend as it was helpful to me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-721856 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 12:32:26 +0000 anne 721856@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks so much for having the courage to tell us what is going on - and the courage to face what was happening and turn it around. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-721792 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 04:55:54 +0000 catgirl 721792@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>KD, I can't send you a big enough hug. </p> <p>I only have a minute, but I wanted to thank you for taking the enormous step of posting here. I have a friend from high school who is battling an eating disorder and she has been posting on Facebook about it. That's a big commitment for her as it forces her to feel accountable knowing other people are checking on her. She did inpatient treatment and is now outpatient. I won't lie to you; it's a struggle for her and food is a constant battle. Eating a slice of pizza is a triumph of will in her case. She is a 46 year old mother of five - from a college age daughter to four boys under 18 - and I think a lot of people find it hard to believe, since the stereotype is that it's a teenage girl issue, which could not be more untrue. Her story sounds like your story; she let herself slide putting other things first and couldn't control it, even though she thought it was in her past. </p> <p>You can and will make it through, dear friend. Please know that you're not alone, and that you are lovely, and will be so much better off when you regain your health and energy. Stay strong and please continue to post here whenever you can. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-721770 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 03:45:15 +0000 Suz 721770@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Dear, dear Krish - </p> <p>I am so, so glad you posted here. I have been thinking of you, and I thought perhaps that work had overtaken your life as it often can when we begin a new job or jobs. And now I see it was work, but more than work. </p> <p>I am so, so sorry to hear of your struggle, and so very glad that you are able to face it and speak of it. You look radiant and healthy and strong in your first three photos, and it is wonderful to see you in better health. </p> <p>I have not struggled with anorexia. But I have struggled with depression, and my first depression was in my 20s. And since then I have always been more vulnerable to depression. It is like a switch that can get flipped by the wrong set of factors - some kinds of stress together with other kinds of stress - it is the direction I always fall if I am going to fall. Perhaps anorexia is like that for you. It is as if the brain has worn itself a track, and if the train slips off the new track it just fits back into the old, even though you *know* the track leads nowhere good. </p> <p>The thing is…you have flipped the switch in the other direction. Do you know how much strength and courage that takes? (How much luck, too, I sometimes think.) </p> <p>And now you are here. Thank god. </p> <p>In terms of fashion, any major body transition will prompt us to question our identity. Am I really that person I see in the mirror? Who IS that person? </p> <p>So it is very normal to be wondering about body type at a time like this. </p> <p>Moreover, this change has been quite quick. Not overnight, but quick enough that there hasn't been much time to adjust. No wonder you are having trouble keeping up with it. No wonder you still feel fat even though you know objectively that you are not. </p> <p>Over time, you will adjust. Your mind will catch up with your body's changes. You will begin to recognize yourself again. Also, I think with any weight change it takes the body a while to "settle." So you really are still physiologically in an unsettled place. That will change. You will heal. </p> <p>As far as body type, I think you are still an IT, with maybe more of an hourglass secondary than before? You have a lovely figure! And you look strong. </p> <p>I think you will discover that some of your clothing still will fit. If it doesn't, many of the same styles will still work, but you might be able to play with a few different silhouettes that wouldn't work at all before. When you've healed some more, this will be fun again, and not so scary - because your energy will be back. It won't feel like such an overwhelming challenge. </p> <p>You are beautiful. You were beautiful before (even if tired and ill) and you are even more beautiful now. I know it will take time for you to feel secure about that -- to believe it. But it is true. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-721751 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 03:13:35 +0000 Michelle 721751@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Darling Krish...this post made me want to come down to your part of our country just so I can give you a hug. As someone who has struggled with body image issues on the opposite end of the spectrum, I am struck by how courageous you have been to set these thoughts down without short-changing yourself for thinking them in the first place. Our brains are marvels some times, but unparalleled tyrants at others. I can't offer you any feedback on the aesthetic questions you're asking yourself, obviously, but I can remind you that this forum and its members are renowned for their unique blend of tact and honesty. Take what the ladies here say at face value. They, like I, care about you and won't lead you astray.<br /> Congratulations for taking those difficult but necessary steps towards better health. I hope your thoughts can catch up to your fabulous new body very soon.<br /> *Cyber hugs, in lieu of real ones* </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-721732 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 02:39:44 +0000 Gaylene 721732@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I can only imagine the courage it took for you to write this post. As women, we can have such complicated relationships with our bodies, but you are so wise to have recognized the problem and addressed it before it was too late.</p> <p>As an outside observer, I can tell you how much more attractive you look in the first three pictures than in the last one. But do you see the difference? That is the hardest part of your journey-- to be able to see that very slender, lovely IT shape in the first three pictures who looks much better than the tired, depleted person in the last picture.</p> <p>I guess my point is that most of us have an idea of what we look like that is so firmly lodged in our heads that it's almost impossible to see ourselves clearly. You look so much better with those 10 pounds that you need to start dressing to celebrate your victory. Not many can do what you have been able to accomplish. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-why-i-havent-been-posting-lately#post-721685 Sat, 15 Sep 2012 01:44:52 +0000 krishnidoux 721685@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Last year I was very active in this forum posting pics of WIW and participating to posts. I still read the post but I have been more silent. There is a reason to this, and I thought I would share it with you because although it is OT, it is also related to dressing. And maybe who knows, others are in the same position.</p> <p>Sometime during the summer I realized I was underweight, but worse... that it was my own fault. Something unconscious surfaced into consciousness, and I began to see that my ways were leading me to malnutrition and were affecting my health. I became conscious that should I keep going this way, I was going to die. There is no other way to put it, because there is no other outcome.</p> <p>This realization was a shock to me. I thought I was a healthy woman, especially since I had beaten anorexia in my twenties. A great feat in my life. I thought I was cured and that it would never happen again. Then slowly these past years I progressively started to feel more and more tired, exhausted I should say. I had a myriad of other issues such as dry skin and feeling cold and a tendency to lose hair but being tired eclipsed them all, it was the most difficult thing to live with.</p> <p>I am followed by a doctor and we did numerous tests, with no specific result. I was underweight, but there was always a reason: a big stress here, a big stress there... except my weight was steadily, slowly dropping until it reached 102 pounds last winter. From there, I was never able to push it back up. I am 5'3 and this weight was too low. Despite the fact I intellectually knew it, it's so strange, it's like there was a dissociation between my lucid intellect and my actual behaviour. This summer I realized this. I started working on more difficult contracts, forcing me to many hours of intense concentration. My dwindling condition made it so difficult. </p> <p>I was actually eating way less than what my heavy schedule and enthusiastic workouts required. I was behaving as if I wanted to lose weight, but for me, that was kind of the "default" mode. And slowly but surely, I was depleting my 44 yrs old body.</p> <p>So I decided to address this. I decided to up my intake of food by about 500 calories a day, starting by eggs in the morning, and two snacks between meals. This is hard! It's unknown, which is scary. And I hate the way I feel and look right now, although I know it is temporary, and have hope that as my body starts to repair itself from the damage, it will feel more normal. </p> <p>Two things happened almost immediately: I stopped being so terribly tired, and I had so much energy! The difference is tremendous. </p> <p>But other things also happened. Bloating, discomfort, feeling like a whale... my breasts started to reappear, my god, had forgotten about those. Great! But my thighs... I feel like they are two balloons. My perma-balloon stomach started to deflate as the rest inflates. </p> <p>It's so strange never to be hungry. I had grown used to constant hunger over the years, and wasn't even aware of it, which in retrospect scares me. </p> <p>Now I am fully aware that some of you will have a hard time with what I say when they see my pics below. And I know intellectually that my body is fine, just needs to keep eating and get strong. What I discovered though, was that the way I was going, I was literately killing myself. But emotionally, inside myself right now, I have been feeling like the Michelin guy for the past month. Many of my clothes don't fit any more.</p> <p>I haven't taken out Fall clothes yet because I fear I won't fit into them. And I am not tempted to put outfits together, because I just feel so low about my body, which is in transition. I've gained AND KEPT 10 pounds since I started 6 weeks ago. </p> <p>Below is:</p> <p>1- a pic of me dressed, in my Gap BF jeans I bought some time ago and in which I have been living. Thank God for BF jeans and BF jeans trend. I wear them unrolled, I find it's more balanced on me that way. </p> <p>2-3 Then two pics of my body now. What body type am I? I thought I was an IT but now I don't know anymore. </p> <p>4- Then finally how I looked a year ago, as I was on my way to become 102 pounds (may have been a few more on these, but not by much). Today, I realize how tired I looked - and believe me, I was.</p> <p>So I hope to continue participating in this forum, posting WIW etc, but for the moment, I am shaky and scared to dress. What if nothing looks good now that my weight is up? I know it is irrational. </p> <p>Thanks for reading. </p>