https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 02 May 2026 19:14:49 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297576 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 18:04:23 +0000 Kari 297576@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>To those who were talking about the difficulty in meeting someone once you are past the college undergraduate age group - I completely agree. Most of my friends (as opposed to my boyfriend's friends) are married and paired off, and they don't tend to have large gatherings or parties (or at least, not those that I'm usually invited to.) I'm also very shy about talking with new people (though I've improved in the last few years) and - without being self-deprecating - I am not the sort of woman that men are usually attracted to in a large party, and people don't really come up and introduce themselves to me most of the time.</p> <p>So several years ago, I had recently healed from a really terrible breakup and sudden combustion of a long "friendship" and was ready to start dating again, but had absolutely no means of doing so in my then-current social circle. One of my coworkers recommended that I try online dating, but I was really reluctant to sign up for a site where I would have to pay or where some automated system would match me up based on my interests. However, I figured that at best, I'd have the chance to meet new people, and at worst I'd end up with funny anecdotes from really terrible dates.<br /> So just to see what was out there, I decided to browse the Craigslist personals section in my city and emailed a few men who seemed like they were likely to be intelligent and down-to-earth and not just looking for a quick fling. These posts were pretty few and far between, but they *are* out there sometimes.</p> <p>I was very lucky to come across my now-boyfriend, who had a very cute little post talking about his interests along with some funny, not remotely self-conscious pictures (including one of him in a very hilarious Halloween costume.) He was the only guy I really hit it off with enough through email to be interested in meeting up in person. When we met, within our first few dates, we were both very honest about what each of us were hoping to find long-term. We really got on well and have been together ever since - a bit over 3 years.</p> <p>I realize that online dating is *not* for everybody, but I also was pretty sure it was not for me, either. After I shared this story with a few friends, I learned that several of my friends also met their significant others through Craigslist personals.</p> <p>That being said, having a romantic partner is not the be-all-and-end-all of my existence, and I've been through long stretches of time where I was perfectly content to be single. I've also experienced a relationship where I was basically being lied to the entire time - and in comparison, I'd *much* rather be single and happy with my life rather than tied to someone who didn't respect or appreciate me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297531 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 16:59:41 +0000 marianna 297531@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Just wanted to chime in and say that I am in a relationship but we are not celebrating Valentine's Day. Don't see the point! It's just another day! I think Maya's thoughts above are very valid. We don't need ONE day out of the year to show our love.</p> <p>Regardless, you don't need a Valentine to buy you chocolates/flowers/etc. You can spoil yourself too. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297526 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 16:46:38 +0000 Maya 297526@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Christine, I have actually found that couples who make a big fuss over Valentine's Day tend to be the ones who have the most problems in their relationships. It's like V-Day serves as an armistice from all the fighting and mistrust that usually goes on...</p> <p>Of course this isn't always true, but I definitely find that among my friends, the ones who don't do anything tend to have the most successful relationships. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297494 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 15:41:29 +0000 crwilson 297494@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I guess this makes me pretty cynical, but I think a lot of people in couples are pretty unhappy, so I don't know that Valentine's Day is particularly fun, necessarily, for couples either, no matter what it might look like from the outside. I guess the grass is always greener... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297418 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 08:27:05 +0000 Lynne 297418@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Elly, that is the BEST story! Next time you are at the docs please do find out what happended and update us on Bonnie's adventures :)</p> <p>Theresa, Maya, and Lyn - that is so bizarre, to be matched up with your ex...</p> <p>Maya and Taylor, we are all watching for an update :)</p> <p>Lyn, have fun! I first saw my husband on a bus...I related the sliding doors story here:</p> <p><a href="http://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/what-was-your-biggest-fashion-one-that-got-away" rel="nofollow">http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....t-got-away</a> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297338 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 03:46:11 +0000 Angie 297338@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hugging everyone here!! There, there.</p> <p>And when you're married, every day should be Valentine's Day - you do not need a holiday to express your love for one another. So Greg and I do not celebrate Valentines Day. But he likes to spoil his little furry Yorkie Valentines though :)</p> <p>Maya and I shopped and had High Tea in NYC last Valentine's Day. It was a great Valentine's Day! </p> <p>Taylor, I think you hit the nail on the head. It's really hard to meet people outside work and the usual circle of mates. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297335 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 03:37:13 +0000 taylor 297335@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>No kidding Maya!!! </p> <p>Lyn..how bizzare they set you up with you ex...what are the odds of that one! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297333 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 03:34:43 +0000 lyn* 297333@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>eHarmony matched me with my ex. I am not impressed. I KNOW we have a lot in common, that's what drove us batty!!!! </p> <p>lol, in other news, met a cutie on the bus.<br /> Coffee tomorrow! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297330 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 03:30:39 +0000 Maya 297330@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I might be in your 'hood this summer...! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297329 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 03:28:06 +0000 taylor 297329@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>How can we hook this up? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297327 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 03:25:56 +0000 Maya 297327@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I hope you're still keeping me in mind, Taylor :p </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh/page/2#post-297326 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 03:24:40 +0000 taylor 297326@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I can't believe how hard it is for young people to meet others. My son is still unattached at 27 and all his friends are either married or completely attached also...no in between, It seems like people don't have the opportunity outside of work to meet others . The circle of friends become smaller or something.</p> <p>He was telling me rather unhappily.."Mom no valentine for me this year:(" </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297321 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 03:10:56 +0000 crazyone 297321@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Maya: I actually agree with you--I've been single for the almost 4 years I've been out of college and I still haven't joined any of those sites, because I'd prefer to meet people in person. The two guys I've ever had big crushes on were people I'd known for at least 2 years before I even started liking them, so being friends with the guy first is really important to me. That said, I'm starting to come around because I think these sites can be a good way to get new people on my radar, though I'll still need to get to know them well first. But yeah, overall, I'm like you, though I think I'm less shy in general. </p> <p>In my opinion, the best way to meet people is through your friends, but people at my age seem extremely hesitant to try to even introduce people together, I don't know why. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297300 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 02:38:50 +0000 Maya 297300@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I don't necessarily dismiss online dating, but it's definitely not for me. I actually would much rather meet someone in person at a party, and I am VERY shy. I look back at past flames and wonder if I would have shown any interest in them if I just saw whatever useless nugget of information they provide, and in all likelihood, I probably would have clicked right past them. </p> <p>Conversely, a big fat jerk like my ex-bf came up as one of my matches! Talk about irony.</p> <p>I think the way you find and seek out people on a dating website is just inherently wrong for me. There is so much information to be gleaned from speaking to and meeting someone in person. It's also nice to be relaxed and not saddled with expectations. I also think people really undervalue being friends with the person they date first. To me it is absolutely necessary to be friends for quite some time, and for that reason, actively looking for relationships doesn't work for me.</p> <p>Keep in mind I can go for very long stetches of time being single and feel perfectly contented, so I guess it's just easier for me than most. The only time I ever get bummed out about being single is when I"m thrown into a situation like the one I'm in now (bang crazy for a married guy...).</p> <p>The point is, people were single after college before the internet existed, and they managed. If anything, it probably forced people to get out more and conquer their shyness. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297292 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 02:30:05 +0000 RandomThoughts (Andrea) 297292@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm with Marley - V.D. (har har so fitting) and New Years are the weakest holidays. I wish I had advice for you but I don't; I've never felt bad about being single or all schmaltzy when I wasn't on said day.</p> <p>If I wouldn't catch flack for it I'd go buy myself a nice box of chocolates and cozy up with a movie and a book at the same time! As it is I'll be going crazy on yardwork and puppy proofing my house. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297290 Sun, 13 Feb 2011 02:23:47 +0000 Theresa 297290@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Well, I'm single, but I still love V Day! Purely because I love all things "romantic" -always have, always will, so even though I know I wont have a valentine this year, it makes me smile to see all the hearts and flowers and things in the shops... weird I know! The only thing I dislike immensely about it, is that I believe you should show your love (and not just with *stuff* BTW), all year round, not just on 1 day.</p> <p>Maya the first time I logged onto an online dating website, the first person to come up was my ex-husband! That's when I knew for me too, that online dating was not an option LOL</p> <p>I woke this morning to find shiny hearts all over my floor - but it was just my girls making a mess with their craft supplies LOL </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297158 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 19:30:31 +0000 crazyone 297158@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm in the same boat as you, Lyn* (except that I've never ever had a boyfriend), and nowadays it is starting to bother me that I'm single. I haven't yet tried online dating, though I think I will soon. Maya, I see what you're saying, but I think the main purpose of online dating is not to rely on what the site thinks is a good match for you, but just to widen the pool and see who's out there in your area who's single and looking for a relationship. Unless you're really social, after undergrad it gets harder and harder to meet new people who are single. It really is a fair amount of work, though, because as you said, profiles aren't enough to say who'll be a good match or not in terms of things like relationship values, etc. But neither is meeting someone for the first time at a party. So there's a fair amount of going on dates with people whom you won't click with, whom you might click with but are incompatible with in the long run, etc.</p> <p>I think you should try to further your crush along! I did this just a few months ago, and while it lasted, it was great fun, though I'm still dealing with the feelings from the abrupt stop (pretty much right after we finally got together and became a couple--the next morning--, he decided that he couldn't deal with the office relationship thing)...Try talking to the guy a little more! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297118 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 17:42:01 +0000 Maya 297118@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I know what you mean Lyn. For me it doesn't bother me that I'm single. It bothers me more that more and more people I know are coupled off because it can get awfully boring fast. I just don't feel like the answer for me is to be coupled off myself. For me the answer is to find new single friends..which is just as hard as I get older.</p> <p>I have seen online dating work for some, but it's definitely not for everyone. When I look back into my past at the kind of dudes I have been with or had crushes on, virtually none of them would have come up as a match for me (although maybe that should tell me something). </p> <p>On that note: Interesting story...</p> <p>My best friend met her SO through an online dating site, and having been so successful and "concerned" for me, she made me sign up (yes, made me...as in stood over my shoulder and chose a username for me--although at least she let me choose my own password..). </p> <p>One of the matches that came up almost immediately was an ex-bf of mine. I knew then and there that this wasn't the way to meet someone. Looking at his profile proved it. Yes, we had a lot of silly things in common about art and politics and movies--but when it came to the important questions about relationships we had virtually nothing in common.</p> <p>There were definitely other problems too, but that was the biggest red flag.</p> <p>After my friend left I deleted my account and haven't been back since. It can definitely work for some, but it wasn't for me at all. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297107 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 17:29:08 +0000 lyn* 297107@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I guess I don't have any single friends anymore. Usually I would call my parents during the day and my sister; and then go out for dinner with single friends as a big group and have a blast.</p> <p>As I was planning this year, I realized I don't have any more single friends. They all have someone.</p> <p>I feel like somewhere along the line, I missed the bandwagon. I don't really want to go out today and see all the lovey-dovey couples. I missing having someone amazing to be with. </p> <p>Maybe I will have to try online dating. But no one really wants a busy mini-doc; apparently dating is even more dismal when I stop being a mini and become a full blown doc. </p> <p>It's not that I don't get male attention. Just not the ones I want, I guess. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297096 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 17:14:50 +0000 Elly 297096@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, I had a funny happen at the doc yesterday. It was early in the morning and I was the second appointment of the day, so it was only me, the receptionists, and the nurse and first appointment. Apparently the first appointment of the day was an older lady named Bonnie that preferred to have the door to her exam room left open (they were just talking, taking blood pressures, and a blood draw). Nurse asks Bonnie if she has any fun plans for the weekend while they wait for a rapid test result to come through, not thinking about Valentine's Day. Bonnie says she isn't doing anything this weekend, but a couple has invited her over for the "14th." She goes on to explain that the couple have also invited "a MAN" from her church over. She goes on to explain how she talked to the female member of this couple and asked her if it was a set up. Apparently female couple member did indeed engineer a set up, and believes Bonnie (who has to be in her late 60s or early 70s) needs to be dating. For gosh sakes, the female couple member's 90-year-old mother is dating!!! Bonnie laughs at this point and thinks for about a minute. She then goes on to relate to the nurse (and by virtue of the open door, all of us) the good traits this man has. Apparently he was married for 50 years and is very stable. We also learned that he is quite excited about their little setup date on "the 14th." Eventually Bonnie starts talking about her first husband and then she leaves the office. The nurse comes in and asks me if I have any plans for the weekend. I just smiled and say, "Nothing as exciting as Bonnie!" and everyone in the office bursts out laughing. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297093 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 16:58:01 +0000 Mamapicklejuice 297093@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hallmark agrees with you, too, Mac - they have Valentine's Day cards from everyone, to everyone...kids, pets, you name it. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297082 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 16:41:52 +0000 lyn* 297082@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks ladies ... time go frock shopping </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297081 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 16:41:31 +0000 Kari 297081@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think my favorite Valentine's day was a few years ago when I got together with a few other single girlfriends to dine on wine, fruit, and chocolate fondue, and then we finished the night with tea and some of our favorite movies. It was a fun party that just happened to fall on Valentine's day, and we had a blast.</p> <p>This year my boyfriend has a milestone birthday in a few weeks, and we are actually doing a big trip to celebrate that, so Valentine's day is going to be incredibly low-key. I've never seen the point in making a big fuss over this holiday anyway as opposed to all other days during the rest of the year. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-297071 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 15:57:38 +0000 Lynne 297071@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think treating yourself is a good antidote.... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-296511 Fri, 11 Feb 2011 21:02:44 +0000 Sally 296511@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I found the times I went all out on Valentines to make it special, I found it a big flop. I wont be doing anything special .....just have a glass of wine after work(like every other day). I just use it as an excuse to make him buy me something (or buy myself a treat,...a book, dress etc.) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-296314 Fri, 11 Feb 2011 15:41:55 +0000 Isabel 296314@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am sooooo with Marley on this one ( disclosure : I have been married for 15 years ) !<br /> I have never been a big holiday fan. On Valentine's Day the kids will still go to school, I will still clean our bathrooms, I still will do homework with them, etc.</p> <p>And I also agree with Mac, love doesn't only exist in a romantic relationship. If I do celebrate, it is usually with my sister ( who is disabled with brain damage). She feels it is HER day so we get her chocolate and flowers and cards. She is so funny, she sees her birthday and VD as the days to celebrate her existence. Which often gets me to thinking, maybe she is not so mentally disabled after all.</p> <p>( BTW , it breaks my heart that single people suffer such angst over........it should be a celebration, not a "reminder" of "failure's". ) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-296301 Fri, 11 Feb 2011 15:16:32 +0000 Lynne 296301@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I like your idea, Mac - my Mum sends all her grandkids VDay cards and I prefer the widened scope..... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-296295 Fri, 11 Feb 2011 15:06:14 +0000 rute 296295@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Well girls said it all already!<br /> Go have tea with your parents! Go shopping! Get a new hairdo!</p> <p>eh eh Marley here I don't receive candies (no way)! He knows I like bags and shoes </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-296293 Fri, 11 Feb 2011 15:02:07 +0000 Mac 296293@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Even when I was in a romantic relationship, I used V-Day as an excuse to celebrate love in all its forms. Sent my best girlfriends cards. Phoned my parents. Bought my pet a new toy... I refuse to let Hallmark tell me that there's only 1 kind of love that's worth honouring! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-single-awareness-day-is-coming-up-ughhhhh#post-296199 Fri, 11 Feb 2011 06:53:04 +0000 Jenava 296199@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I use it as an excuse to purchase very expensive, fancy chocolates for myself. (-: </p>