YouLookFab Forum » Topic: OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond

YouLookFab Forum » Topic: OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 25 Apr 2026 15:21:50 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php Fruitful on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474467 Sat, 26 Nov 2011 08:19:50 +0000 Fruitful 474467@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ What a beautiful poem Suz, and what a freeing sentiment. I have lost so many things in life, as I suppose we all have, and they often left me troubled, haunted even, partly with the simple disturbance of not knowing what happened, and partly the kinds of symbolism you were worried about. When my children lose things they cry, they cry, and my heart aches for them, as it does for you. It's going from that taken for granted feeling that the world is right, to suddenly feeling (remembering?) we stand on the edge of a precipice. It seems like you've been thrown just in this way to contemplate mortality and the fragile beauty of the now moment. Thanks for sharing this with us Suz, and I do hope your mother's diamond comes to you, but I am so happy you can find a place within where that's no longer the question or the answer. Anonymous on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474437 Sat, 26 Nov 2011 05:13:36 +0000 Anonymous 474437@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ That is a lovely, thought provoking poem. (I wanted to add a line about losing sleep!)I'm sure this experience, however it turns out, will be more material for writing as you learn more about yourself and life. I'm glad that you are able to relax and accept whatever happens, as painful as that might be. That said, I just had to pipe up and add that a jeweler once told me that most diamonds are lost in the bedclothes, so check carefully the next time you wash the sheets! Not that you're still looking frantically or anything! Kari on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474436 Sat, 26 Nov 2011 05:08:33 +0000 Kari 474436@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz, I hadn't encountered that poem before. How beautiful - thank you for sharing. Suz on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474389 Sat, 26 Nov 2011 02:44:26 +0000 Suz 474389@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Thanks, Kari. I am really feeling a lot better about it now. 24 hours and a night's sleep were a big help. And Elizabeth Bishop's "One Art." One Art The art of losing isn't hard to master; so many things seem filled with the intent to be lost that their loss is no disaster, Lose something every day. Accept the fluster of lost door keys, the hour badly spent. The art of losing isn't hard to master. Then practice losing farther, losing faster: places, and names, and where it was you meant to travel. None of these will bring disaster. I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or next-to-last, of three beloved houses went. The art of losing isn't hard to master. I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster, some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent. I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster. -- Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident the art of losing's not too hard to master though it may look like (Write it!) a disaster. Kari on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474376 Sat, 26 Nov 2011 02:28:38 +0000 Kari 474376@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz, that story really tugs on my heartstrings. I'm so sorry that your stone has gone missing, and I'm guilty of sometimes putting too much emotion into *things* - I have had a hard time in the past giving away something that was a gift from a friend or family member because I felt like giving away the item was like rejecting the person. When I realized my closet was overflowing with stuff that I didn't use, I took a long, hard look at that attitude and had to keep reminding myself that giving away, breaking, or losing a THING had nothing to do with my relationship with the person. But the gut reaction when that happens is definitely painful. I really love Claire's suggestion if the stone does not turn up - but I will keep my fingers crossed for you that it will surprise you by popping up where you least expect it. Suz on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474356 Sat, 26 Nov 2011 01:54:51 +0000 Suz 474356@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Thank you, again, everyone. Rae, thanks so much for the moissanite tip (I had never even heard of them before!) and Claire and MaryK, thank you for sharing your own stories. Claire, that is an amazingly huge stone and looks beautiful! And what a story. So glad you were able to replace it to your liking and money towards your house as well! Thank you Jean, Tara, Krish, Shannon, Patty, and all for your so-kind thoughts. I will search the clothing again carefully, Krish. But mostly I am taking the view that if it wants to be found, it will show up. Sort of like your lost button. Transcona Shannon on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474320 Sat, 26 Nov 2011 00:34:57 +0000 Transcona Shannon 474320@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Just letting you know I'm thinking 'bout you Suz. MsMary on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474314 Sat, 26 Nov 2011 00:29:06 +0000 MsMary 474314@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I want to add my vote to the Moissanite contingent. My engagement ring is a 2-carat-plus size Moissanite and I love it for all the reasons Claire stated, plus no "blood diamond" guilt. And no, it is NOT an omen! krishnidoux on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474299 Sat, 26 Nov 2011 00:03:05 +0000 krishnidoux 474299@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz, don't wash your yoga clothes just yet! Losing jewellery often happens when we change in and out of clothes. It might be stuck in it, or inside a coat sleeve. Hugs to you, anywho. I am so sorry about this unfortunate experience, especially after your husband had a similar loss too. I pray that you find both back. It is not an "omen" I agree, but I find your analogy very true, very astute, about loosing someone so precious as your mom. As my own mother laid unconscious in hospital this week, I truly felt how our external envelope is... just that, an envelope, a tray, and when the soul is gone from it, it looks empty like the empty tray from a ring. Maybe theme for a short story? Replacing the diamond with a replica is also a good solution, since the true value of the ring is not in its diamond, but in the meaning it carries for you, every time you look at it, every time you think of it. You have to find peace with it again. I'm sending you all my good thoughts. tarzy on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474284 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 23:06:24 +0000 tarzy 474284@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Hugs! These things just happen. It's not an omen. But if it is, it means that things are just things, and that you are strong and you can let physical things go. What endures is the spirit and the love and the memories. You know this, and you can live this. But it's not an omen! greenglove on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond/page/2#post-474281 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 23:01:38 +0000 greenglove 474281@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz, It is not an omen. Things like that do not have the power to dictate what happens. It is a sad thing but ultimately is something that is bringing you closer to your Mom. Think of how much you have thought about her during this ordeal. Whether or not you find the diamond the true gift is how much you cherish her. I love the idea of replacing it with something you can afford. You are blessed to have the relationship that you do. Try not to spend it in worry about what cannot be. You may find the diamond but probably after you have let go. The true grief is about your Mom and there is always healing when we really are able to be in our feelings. Jonesy on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474268 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 22:22:40 +0000 Jonesy 474268@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ How sad. It makes sense that you would think automatically about losing her....I hope you don't feel like it's an omen, just bad luck. Anonymous on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474267 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 22:22:14 +0000 Anonymous 474267@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Rae, I have a Moissonite ring, and they are much more expensive than CZs, but about the tenth of the price of a diamond. Suz, at the rist of highjacking your thread, permit me to tell you about it. Back when we lived in Pittsburgh, I was in a jewelry store and they offered to clean my engagement ring. The jeweler discovered that my diamond was chipped. I was heartbroken as I was attached to my stone, which the hubs had bought loose in the diamond district of NYC. We had it insured, so we called the insurance company to see what could be done. They sent a man to the house with equivalent "replacement" stones. I hated them all and was distraught. The other option was to give them my stone and accept a large payout. I did nothing for several years until we were getting ready to move across the country. We would be changing insurance companies and a decision had to be made. My husband was fine with whatever I wanted to do. I had seen Moissanites on TV and was intrigued by them. We took the payout and had our jeweler order some loose stones for us to look at. I ended up getting a larger Moissanite than my original diamond because they didn't come in fractions of carats (that took a bit of the sting out of it). My diamond had been over a carat and I didn't want to go with a smaller stone than I started with, so I got a 2 carat equivalent Moissanite. If I remember right, it cost about $1500. A diamond of that size and quality would have cost over $15,000. We had $5-6,000 leftover from the payout and we put it towards our new house. I've had the Moissanite stone in my engagement ring for 7+ years now and it wears hard just like a diamond. It has the benefit of having a slightly yellowish cast, so everyone assumes it's a diamond. It has never turned cloudy like a CZ can and since it's not perfectly white, it doesn't look like other diamond simulants. I've been very happy with my decision, and I think it's a great option to anyone in a similar situation. Wow that sounds really cold and heartless in the face of your ailing Mom. I'm sorry. I'm trying to help and being a bit of a bozo. I'm so sorry that your Mom is doing poorly, but I'm glad you are treasuring the time you have left with her and know that SHE is the real treasure, not the lost diamond. <<<hugs>>> Patty on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474179 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 19:10:46 +0000 Patty 474179@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Isn't it amazing how I can loose my car in a parking lot but others have found their diamonds in carpets!!!! My Mom lost her Mom's diamond too and it mysteriously showed up one day on the cupboard--cue Twilight Zone music. rae on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474173 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 18:55:23 +0000 rae 474173@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You are lucky to be in touch enough with your emotions to already realize you are more worried about your mom than the stone - there are definitely people who would only realize this after the fact. Now you can focus on spending time with your mom. :) I also really like moissanite as an alternative to czs. They are nearly as hard as diamonds (I'm hard on my rings) and throw some nice fire. I don't know the prices in relation to cz, but it's another option to ask about. Ana on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474170 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 18:51:55 +0000 Ana 474170@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Sveta, what a lovely sentiment! I like the way your great grandmother thinks. Anonymous on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474169 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 18:50:13 +0000 Anonymous 474169@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Aw, that made me tear up Suz.... i think it is good that you are recognizing the meaning behind your fear of losing the diamond and recognizing that it is not an omen- but a lesson in letting go... life is so hard- I've had way too much experience this year with letting go.... I do hope you find it, or find peace in making the ring whole again, even with a cz. Suz on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474168 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 18:46:37 +0000 Suz 474168@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Thank you so much, everyone, for your kind words and thoughts and your reassurances. It has not turned up this morning in the car, at my yoga class, or at home. I haven't yet tried the vacuum idea but we will do that this afternoon or tomorrow. I'm feeling calmer about it and letting it go. Trying not to see it as an omen. I think that is the worst part; because I have been worrying about my mom and know she doesn't have long to live I was viewing it as a foretaste of losing her. It's not the stone; it's her that I don't want to lose. It doesn't help that my husband lost his wedding ring this month, too! JUST after we were talking about how he needs to have it resized after losing weight! So ironic. What a great idea, Alicat (and others) to replace the stone with the zirconia. I will inquire at the jewellers how much it would cost to do that. I think I would feel better putting something in that empty space, even if it cannot be a diamond. Also, it was weirdly comforting to learn how very many of you have had this experience! And so many have eventually found that stone! So I am not giving up hope entirely. It might turn up yet. Thank you all, again. Anonymous on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474143 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 18:11:01 +0000 Anonymous 474143@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Oh Suz my heart aches for you! Especially since Mom is still living and might ask where it is. I hope it turns up. I was able to buy some cheap CZ earrings and put one in my late MIL's ring where the diamond was missing. I did it myself with a pair of small jeweler's pliers from a craft store. I figure that if THAT falls out, I now have a spare (the other earring). Sveta on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474120 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 17:20:02 +0000 Sveta 474120@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Oh, I am so sorry, Suz. I hope with others that it will turn up in your search. However if it does not don't blame yourself and don't get sick worrying over it. After all even sentimental things are just that - things, it is more important that your dear people are in your heart and your thoughts and always with you and you cannot loose it! On the other note my great grand mother used to say: Everything happens to the better. Who knows, maybe this is the price you have to pay to the fate to avoid some much worst disaster? This is what I tell myself when I loose something valuable: who knows, maybe I have avoided being hit by a car this way?:-) This really helps me to let it go... Here my fingers are crossed for your search! Kappy on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474112 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 17:02:16 +0000 Kappy 474112@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I'm so sorry, Suz. I hope it turns up. It's the worst feeling in the world. I also lost the diamond out of my engagement ring two years ago. I noticed it when I was out shopping for soccer gear with my kids. I frantically crawled around the entire store on my knees looking for it. Then I retraced my steps from the entire day through parking lots, stores and two schools. After not finding it, I was despondent about losing it and called my husband to tell him. Later that day I went into my son's room and saw a little sparkle on his rug; it turned out to be my diamond! My mother also once lost her diamond and found it in the backseat of her car. morethanbeige on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474104 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 16:52:39 +0000 morethanbeige 474104@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ So sorry, Suz. I echo rae. Don't blame yourself. This happens. This has happened to me. Holding out hope and prayers that it reappears! Angie on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474103 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 16:51:46 +0000 Angie 474103@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Urggggh! I feel sick and sad with you, Suz. I was going to suggest what Ali said. Can you replace it with a cubic zirconia? That way the sentiment will still be in tact. rae on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474095 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 16:37:12 +0000 rae 474095@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Oh no!!! Very sad, but please don't blame yourself - it happens to a lot of people (my mother included), and it's just one of those things. Prongs can shift or loosen over time, and some settings are more succeptible than others... you just don't know. Anonymous on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474062 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 15:34:06 +0000 Anonymous 474062@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I am so sorry! I know how it feels, I lost mine earlier this week... I had not been wearing it because the diamond was set high and caught on everything... I was going to fix it someday, just had not gotten around to it.. I am holding out hope that it shows up! I will hold out hope that you find your diamond under the seat of your car this morning! HUGS! GL! When checking under the seat look closely by the part where the seat is screwed into the floor, things get lost there in my car often.... Isis on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474049 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 14:59:23 +0000 Isis 474049@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz, I am really sorry this happened. What a thing to happen, aargh. I like Alicat's idea of setting a simliar cubic zirconia in the ring. For me, that would allow me to continue to wear the piece..... I do hope that it turns up, though. Claudia on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474047 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 14:53:07 +0000 Claudia 474047@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I'd be so upset, too, Suz. I really hope it turns up soon. I am sorry this happened. Anonymous on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-474016 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 13:26:07 +0000 Anonymous 474016@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz, I'm so sorry! I really hope it turns up. You could replace it with a cubic zirconia if you don't want to distress your mother. goldenpig on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-473975 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 07:15:04 +0000 goldenpig 473975@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I'm so sorry. I hope you find it. Maybe it will turn up somewhere in your car? If it's gone, don't blame yourself, these things happen. It's your mom who's the important treasure, not the little pebble. Hugs!!! Katiepea on "OT: Sad because I've lost my mother's diamond" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-sad-because-ive-lost-my-mothers-diamond#post-473964 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 06:53:36 +0000 Katiepea 473964@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz, I am SO sorry this has happened to you. I can only imagine how you must feel. I managed to lose one of my precious, diamond stud earrings (that were given to me to celebrate the birth of our children). I was quite distraught given the sentimental reason as well as the expense (1 earring isn't particularly useful in my household). I looked and looked, but just couldn't find it and gave up hope. One day, about three months later, my husband was cleaning our pool when he saw a tiny twinkle - he knelt down to investigate and lo and behold, it was the missing earring! We have no idea how it wasn't sucked up by the creepy crawly after all those months. I guess I'm saying - don't give up hope!