https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Thu, 30 Apr 2026 04:15:21 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-877419 Thu, 14 Mar 2013 01:00:46 +0000 fern 877419@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Worked for me. I met my husband online about 8 years ago - in my early 30s. I was feeling optimistic &amp; "ready to date" at the time, so that was key.<br /> My favorite thing about meeting via a dating site was that the intentions were clear. We have a similar introverted personality, and both of us joke that we have never understood flirting behavior, so even if we had met in real life, who knows if we would have made a connection?<br /> I would recommend posting your profile when you are available, but not really before. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-877075 Wed, 13 Mar 2013 19:00:20 +0000 Kalli 877075@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Much thanks to all the feedback I've been getting. It is hard being in the dating zone. Almost makes one want to give up after trying so much but after having heard many points of view and success stories, I guess I'm willing to go out there and try (but after my vacation to Hawaii) at the end of the month. Or should I post my profile and then respond when coming back from vacation? Anyhow, at least I'll have more interesting potential date night outfits to show instead of my boring work clothes :). </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-876548 Wed, 13 Mar 2013 08:03:01 +0000 lyn* 876548@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>@ Mo - one of the docs I work with brought home SARS and gave it to her husband, so I guess it's that kind of threatening job too </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-876334 Wed, 13 Mar 2013 02:07:46 +0000 Krista 876334@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I met my husband through Lavalife, an online dating site - but I am not one to really speak to online dating as he was the first guy to message me privately on the site and the rest is pretty much history. That being said, I was single for 8 years before I met him, so I did my time in the dating world, just not the online dating world! I think online dating is the same as meeting someone in person - you hit it off or you don't and even if you hit it off, you still have to make it work because everyone comes into a relationship with baggage. I also think it's key to be all of who you are without hiding anything. When I met my husband, I was making great money in a great job and I had just bought my own home. He loved those things about me, in fact, he says they were key factors in why he liked me so much - he was looking for an independent and smart woman with whom to spend his life. </p> <p>Dating is really hard and I don't think there's any right way to do it. I think you just need to do what feels right for you. What I found the hardest was the actual living of your life while you were trying to meet/find someone - sometimes the time felt long no matter how busy I was. But it really can change in a second, so I send you lots of positive vibes and hope you meet the right person for you... soon! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-875933 Tue, 12 Mar 2013 19:54:03 +0000 rachylou 875933@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've dated people met through old fashioned personals, matched dating, and just met on the web. I think matched dating is the hardest. It's so personal-goal driven, everybody is in interrogation mode, and that's just about smack dab opposite of the sort conditions that relationships develop in. You want to form a "we", not "a me and a me." </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-875785 Tue, 12 Mar 2013 17:57:26 +0000 Mo 875785@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ha! I read threatening as being around sick people could threaten your health lol. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-875723 Tue, 12 Mar 2013 17:14:02 +0000 adorkable 875723@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm getting a PhD in June and my boyfriend - who I met online - hasn't finished his Bachelor's. Seriously, the ones who will be put off by that stuff are the ones you want to avoid anyway. I found that being clear about it just made it easier to weed them out! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-875554 Tue, 12 Mar 2013 14:17:09 +0000 Mochi 875554@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I know; I found myself shaking my head at that. I will interpret it as woman in a profession that required higher level of education, conveys more status and almost surely pays more than his job. Sigh. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-875509 Tue, 12 Mar 2013 13:12:28 +0000 cheryle (Dianthus) 875509@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I may have missed a reference but I don't understand what a "threatening" job is. Could someone explain please.. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-875405 Tue, 12 Mar 2013 10:39:41 +0000 transition 875405@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I don't have an opinion of online dating, but I thought I'd share what my sister is doing [she's one with a somewhat threatening job, larger than average figure, and in her 30s]. </p> <p>First, she's active in a few service organizations, like Habitat for Humanity, where she is able to work alongside like-minded men.</p> <p>Second, she has found a singles group for her city and helps organize some of the events. It sounds a little like what Dianthus described.</p> <p>Good luck! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-875213 Tue, 12 Mar 2013 02:41:09 +0000 adorkable 875213@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I met my current boyfriend on the intarwebs, but ... YMMV.</p> <p>Bad things: it's true, there are a lot of broken people around those parts.</p> <p>Good things: there's also a lot of people you'd overlook because they're nice and brilliant but not outgoing and cocky.</p> <p>You do have to be honest about who you are and what you do and don't want for it to work at all, though. I'd think of it as just one more way to meet people; I didn't stop going to parties or asking friends to set me up or being friendly in the coffee shop, and it just so happens that the guy I ended up with was the one I met *this* way instead of one of those ways. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-875079 Tue, 12 Mar 2013 00:28:31 +0000 lyn* 875079@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I wanted to add that I don't know what you do for a living, but if you're like me and have a "threatening" sort of a job, I'd keep that under wraps. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-874775 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 20:23:25 +0000 cheryle (Dianthus) 874775@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I joined an online dating site in an interesting way. A guy friend of mine had joined Plenty of Fish (POF) and met a woman through the site. He had a theory about something and wanted to test it. It had something to do with the age and number of contacts. I signed up and found it rather interesting. I participated in the forums and through them, met a group of people who were mostly from other cities. They met weekly for wings and had dinners together on some of the holidays. The local POF often had social events that were organized by members and posted on the forums. I met my current partner at a card tournament that was organized by two people from the group and at a subsequent event (rock climbing) that I organized. He got in touch to ask about family friendly vacations and mentioned having gone to a learn to golf event. We started golfing together and then going to dinner, movies, the ballets, etc. We were friends for the first 6 months or so and then started dating. That was about 6 years ago.</p> <p>My guy friend's relationship didn't work out but he met a great woman a year or so later and they have been married for two years now. She has also become one of my closest friends. We are all in our late 40s and early 50s.</p> <p>Having said all that, I think common interests is very important to a relationship so if you can get out and do things you love, you are likely to meet people who like doing the same things and with whom you have common interests. Perhaps join a golf league or take a class but get out and meet people - both men and women. The bigger your group, the more likely you are to meet someone compatible. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-874740 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 19:36:23 +0000 Kalli 874740@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ah more wise advice and feedback from everyone. I think I should give it a shot, except at the same time I seem to attract the sort of guy that I'm not attracted to: aka muscle bound guys who are into themselves. I'm like you zap, I much prefer the type of guy that una and you are say are great. My last bf wasn't very tall and he wasn't that much bigger than me either, but he had a wonderful personality. I'm wondering how I go off meeting that same type of guy because generally they don't really care for well dressed girls: the only time he complimented me was when I was wearing a tshirt (witty one) and jeans. It's a conundrum. Does actually caring about what I wear mean that I'm so into myself? I would hope not. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-874720 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 19:12:41 +0000 Anonymous 874720@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>One of my colleagues met her now husband thru an online dating site, so I guess it works for some people.</p> <p>My fiancee tried eharmony for a bit but bailed out, after going on a couple dates. I think he falls on Una's friend descriptor, althought he is still taller and heavier than me ( not by much though). I think his perception is that he was not really blessed in the looks department, so women brushed him off.</p> <p>In case you are wondering, *I* snatched him up at work. Looks mean zilch to me and he is a great guy!</p> <p>I think you should give it a shot. Why not? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-874107 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 04:08:43 +0000 Mo 874107@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ah, as a bartender I see *all* kinds of people and I can honestly say that many of them met the old fashioned way at a bar or restaurant or grocery store, etc. Of course, the fact that I see them in a similar environment could be a tilt to one side of the scale . . .<br /> I can say for myself that meeting in a completely commitment, anxiety, free environment of just mixing with other people is optimal. No 'putting the best foot forward' or 'saying the right thing'. It's just people in a room together with other people, enjoying themselves, and maybe seeing what they have in common, or at least being entertained by/with each other </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-874104 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 04:02:22 +0000 DonnaF 874104@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've read that it's better when the woman is the one who contacts the man. I have no experience with this. Have a friend who met her late partner of many years through online dating. Both were probably in their late forties at the time. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-874100 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 04:00:16 +0000 catgirl 874100@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sort of echoing Anna, I wouldn't rule out people based on criteria that may not matter in the long run. I have an extremely eligible single male friend who was not considered by so many women because he is pretty slightly built (he's from India, so small by American standards). I can't believe how many women passed up on a kind, funny, well-employed, good--looking, romantic and thoughtful guy because they were afraid of dating someone shorter or who weighed less than them. Luckily he met a great gal the old-fashioned way - at some random party - and just got engaged.</p> <p>Maybe I should post a general thread about dating a guy who is shorter or weighs less than you... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-874079 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 03:38:32 +0000 Kalli 874079@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>That's what I am thinking, take it with a grain of salt. I knew I could count on all honest perspectives in this forum. Thanks! Can't wait to hear more feedback. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-874056 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 03:14:33 +0000 deb 874056@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>EHarmony put my husband and me together, I just thought of the whole process as a big social experiment. I had been single for 12 years and really did not plan on getting married again so I did not take it too seriously and laughed a lot at the idiots. My husband and I have been married 3 1/2 years now. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-874055 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 03:13:17 +0000 lyn* 874055@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>When I tried eHarmony it matched me up with my ex, a guy in my class, and a random I never wanted to see again. I tried PoF as well, and there was a guy who ended up having an asian fetish ... yeah; that didn't work.</p> <p>I think online isn't a solution to finding people the good old fashioned way </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-873981 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 01:46:59 +0000 Kalli 873981@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I sent you a message </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-873971 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 01:39:21 +0000 annagybe 873971@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lately, my biggest issue it that guys say they're willing to meet again after the first date but then *poof*. I'm a take it slow kind of person and thinks it takes more than one meeting to get know someone. I'm a big girl, if you don't want to see me again then freaking tell me. Don't walk me to my car and give me a hug and then disappear. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-873955 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 01:28:32 +0000 Kalli 873955@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lol, I'm quite bitter about it myself already which is why I posted this topic. It's so many women are married or taken and well there is nothing wrong with you or I, guys just stink! I was fortunate to be on match the first time and meet someone but then I tried okcupid and that sucked big time. Wondering if I should pay for match again, try it for 3-6 months and then quit. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-873942 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 01:23:47 +0000 annagybe 873942@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I was on match when I was overweight. I hate to say it but my weight made a difference. I was on there for six months before I bailed. I met one I thought was a decent guy. First date coffee, second date dinner, and third date was snowshoeing with his friends. Then he dropped off the face of the earth and didn't return my calls or messages. Seriously, unfortunately that was my the most success I had online.<br /> I think you get slightly better guys on the paid sites, because that's an automatic filter. I just got tired of paying period.<br /> Please, please take what I said with a huge grain of salt. I've become increasingly bitter with dating in general. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-873925 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 01:15:03 +0000 Kalli 873925@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>That's the thing, I did online dating briefly and it does stink! I met my last one the old fashioned way. Ugh, I'm just getting the courage to start getting out there. Do you think match or okcupid is better? I know we can't be picky. I also read something about how relationships work better when you don't have everything in common. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-873912 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 01:00:01 +0000 annagybe 873912@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've been online dating on and off for over four years. Match.com, eHarmony and now OKCupid. I have not been successful. My work schedule makes it difficult to get out and about so I still try.<br /> Be prepared for a lot stinker dates and flakey guys. Also don't be hard and rigid in your type, you might be surprised.<br /> Though really you shouldn't listen to me because I'm a jaded old *****. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/opinion-on-online-dating#post-873888 Mon, 11 Mar 2013 00:38:26 +0000 Kalli 873888@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Needless to say but I finally think I should be over my last bf (we broke up in Sept 2012) and I'm finding it hard to meet people in person since my bandwidth for traffic makes me a hermit. That and I wanted to focus on me for a while. Really, I'm a bit introverted except when I already know you.</p> <p>Does anyone have an opinion about online dating and success or think it's a bad idea?</p> <p>I also need ideas on how I could meet people that might be in my age group? I'm in my early 30s. It would be nice to meet someone but at the same time I am okay being single too. </p>