https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Mon, 27 Apr 2026 21:34:31 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas/page/2#post-1646323 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 23:28:29 +0000 Anonymous 1646323@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks for the explanation, Rachylou. Living in the South or Midwest, most folks wave, and strike up a conversation if they see you in the supermarket, bank or whatever. My DH and I have had to deal with neighbors who have given us fits over petty things, but that's because they're Southerners who haven't mastered the art of minding their own business. They're not bad people; just nosy, with no boundaries. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas/page/2#post-1646301 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 22:32:48 +0000 Dottie 1646301@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It may be that government division recruits a certain sort of individual or skill set that leans more introverted. &nbsp;That's why they aren't proficient at small talk. &nbsp;Just a thought (smile). </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas/page/2#post-1646253 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 20:29:28 +0000 rachylou 1646253@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Bad neighbors are a whole other ball of wax, betty. Lol. I meant bad neighbor<i>hood</i>.</p> <p>Bad neighborhood etiquette has as many little rules as 'proper etiquette.' For example: You don't ask what people do for a living, but a little 30-second elevator speech about <i>your values </i>is instead the norm (not into bragging, gossip, game playing, loyalty, respect, courtesy, keeping it cool, etc.). There are only two paces to go at - a saunter and a dead run. If you see one of the scary denizens and start walking faster or cross the street - that's very offensive. You keep your head up but you don't <i>take notice</i>. If you <i>do </i>take notice, you have a compliment ready, 'cuz there's no other reason to be staring. If you catch someone's eye, pass close, you nod; mayhap exchange a little banter. You keep your eyes on your own test paper at all times.</p> <p>There's more of course. But like now, living in a very very good neighborhood, everything is different. You cross the street so everyone can have a sidewalk to himself. You don't have to say hello at all when you pass, because we're all too important and busy for that. And at the same time, you expect to have your business poked into, to be quizzed about what you do.</p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas/page/2#post-1646247 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 20:14:17 +0000 Gaylene 1646247@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think there are numerous reasons for feeling awkward in social situations where the "cues" aren't the ones you normally encounter. Rachylou is right that etiquette training, while helpful, goes only so far because the "rules" can shift rather precipitously depending on roles, culture, age, gender, and situation. Wanting to retreat to a "safe" spot is a very human reaction whenever any of us feel out of our comfort zone </p> <p>Generational differences in social situations can be especially tricky because we share so much, yet can think and react quite differently. It bothers me to hear people in my age group being negative about younger people, just like it bugs me to be dismissed as an "old lady" by someone younger. We don't learn much about each other by resorting to narrow, pre-conceived categories. I think a big dose of respect and kindness on both sides works better to smooth out our differences. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas/page/2#post-1646230 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 19:35:53 +0000 Anonymous 1646230@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I agree with <b>Rachylou</b> about the lack of etiquette training. I do, however, want to know more about about bad neighbor etiquette. I've always followed the Golden Rule. It works in most instances. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas/page/2#post-1646227 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 19:23:31 +0000 Barbara Diane 1646227@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>La Pedestrienne</b>, I'd be interested to know more of your thoughts on&nbsp;</p> <p>free speech vs safe spaces.<br /><b>Rachylou,&nbsp;</b>what is bad neighborhood&nbsp;etiquette? I admit I wasn't taught much of the etiquette you mentioned, so I haven't taught my sons either.</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1646217 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 18:52:25 +0000 rachylou 1646217@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>The vast majority have never had etiquette lessons and very little of the old etiquette is preserved today. How many people know who should present or introduce himself/herself first when an older and younger person are meeting for the first time? If you're jogging or biking on a sidewalk or narrow lane, and you're coming up on a person going in the same direction, how many know the words (in English) to say? How many know 'bad neighborhood' etiquette? I think it's very interesting, then, the role clothing plays in these situations. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1646216 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 18:50:05 +0000 Anonymous 1646216@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I haven't read all of the comments, but my DD has social anxiety and behaves in a similar fashion. She's in therapy, on medication, and gradually getting better. She's definitely not afraid to express her beliefs and opinions at home, though. At least, as a mother, I can be glad that she opens up to me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1646214 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 18:45:11 +0000 catgirl 1646214@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Our upscale consignment store is called Plain Jane and sells the most stylish items in town. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1646212 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 18:41:21 +0000 texstyle 1646212@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thinking more of it, it's true, the way people dress is not necessarily representative of a particular mindset or personality, etc. Although I will admit after interviewing hundreds of people in my life, there are definitely some common threads. Pun not intended but it works well. </p> <p>I think especially when we are younger we experiment with many different styles and sometimes throughout life even never settle on just one. The whole "shadow style"&nbsp; and "style shift" conversations here on&nbsp; YLF come back to mind.</p> <p>Anyway, I hope younger people will not stifle their own opinions due to fear of backlash. Freedom of speech and of opinions, etc. is SO important to progress. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1646199 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 18:03:06 +0000 Anonymous 1646199@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Just to keep it real -- the original post had quite a few negative words, like "boring," "exhausting," "discouraged," etc., so I can understand why people felt you were being harsh. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1646197 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 18:00:50 +0000 LaPed 1646197@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Speaking as a 30 year old, I feel the current hipster-normcore-nerdcore look is a completely separate issue from young people who aren't comfortable being outspoken. To me the looks you've shown are all very stylized, intentional, deliberate statements. I definitely wouldn't consider those women plain-jane or sporting no-make-up looks... And I know plenty of men who don suspenders and newsboy caps and manage to be articulate and witty.</p> <p>My generation is in an odd place right now when it comes to free speech vs safe spaces; I have very complicated feelings about this subject and I won't get into a lengthy diatribe here, but I think it has a lot to do with living our social lives online and the slurs, trolling, stalking, and other negative fallout that result from our new modes of communication.&nbsp;</p> <p>What ties these two phenomena together, I'd say, is that we are arguably the first post-modern generation. We've been steeped in Foucault, Derrida, etc, and have a hard time swallowing the notion of culture as a monolith, or opinions as truth... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1646195 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 17:56:56 +0000 krishnidoux 1646195@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am not criticizing anyone, but trying to understand. I am sorry if my words sounded harsh, it was not intended that way. The "Plain Jane" look is just a reference, a trend that seems to be on the rise. It's not any better nor worse than anything else. The expression "Plain Jane" is used as a tentative to describe in part an attitude on top of a style, and to me, it is not deprecatory, but neutral. Maybe it is because English is not my mother tongue. I realize I should not have used this expression.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1646140 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 16:10:59 +0000 BlondeAmbition 1646140@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Are we criticizing clothes or personalities? I quite like the look and would describe it as a hipster nerd. People come with a variety of personalities so I think it's wrong to generalize an entire group of men based on what they wear. I think "plain Jane" is a totally unfair way to describe any woman and plenty of women with the name Jane wouldn't like it either. The girls are quite stylish by the way, nothing plain there. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1646111 Mon, 18 Apr 2016 15:02:07 +0000 texstyle 1646111@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think part of the change is the whole PC movement gone haywire - it seems that many younger people are overly concerned about offending someone or revealing some bias that they often tend to clam up in social situations. Lately I'm enjoying the rural "country" kids who seem to be eager to discuss nearly any topic, rather it's what they went hunting for last weekend, or who they intend to vote for and why. Not to mention they seem to know how to actually work on things and fix them. And often they play music or sing as well. Love that type of multi-talented individual! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645833 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 20:56:45 +0000 JAileen 1645833@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krishnidoux, I wasn't offended! I do know from my son and his friends, though, that there is a lot of variation amongst them. Some are outgoing and some are shy, most have tattoos (except my son), and all are interesting and funny. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645746 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 18:27:18 +0000 rachylou 1645746@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My brother doesn't dress like this, and he's a talker (read 'pontificator' ), but he doesn't experience his experiences. That's the cold hard truth. He is an Evolutionist via PBS. I took evolution in school for my degree, therefore I ALWAYS take the Creationist side of our chats. Hehe. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645618 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 11:36:28 +0000 krishnidoux 1645618@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I didn't mean to offend anyone! Of course not everybody is like this. Of course many people fitting the above description will be articulate and hold brilliant conversation! And of course, a bare face is certainly not wrong, neither is the Plain Jane look. Far from it!</p> <p>I was just trying to identify trends among younger pple I have met recently. When I was young, we also had trends like this: punk, new-wave, grunge... and those also came with an attitude. I'm sure I was the silliest of them all. But it's beside the point.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645585 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 04:24:49 +0000 Sally 1645585@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My nephew dresses like that and has a beard.&nbsp; He is a very articulate person who has a lot to contribute to a conversation.</p> <p>Having said that, there are always perceptions about others across generations or even across different groups.&nbsp; People might be quiet outside of their social circle, be it differences in age, cultural groups etc&nbsp;because they are not sure how someone will react or what they would talk to someone about.&nbsp;&nbsp; </p> <p>I saw a girl with brightly coloured hair in the thrift shop I went to yesterday.&nbsp; It was blue hair and really suited her olive complexion.&nbsp; I can't remember what she was wearing.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645577 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 04:01:43 +0000 rachylou 1645577@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Futurama could be a good conversation starter... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645556 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 03:02:53 +0000 Desmo April 1645556@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I know a ton of people that fit the physical description. I generally don't find conversation with any of them a problem. </p> <p>What is the problem with "<br /> Plain Jane bare face under brightly colored hair?" First, not a single example that you have posted is anything even approaching plain Jane. Second, why can't a woman wear minimal makeup? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645503 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 21:16:32 +0000 JAileen 1645503@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Audrey Tautou is a plain jane?</p> <p>My son is 28. He definitely has good communication skills. He has taught both children and adults. He seems comfortable talking to different age groups. He does have a beard, though, and dresses kind of strangely IMO. I attributed this to his buying most of his clothes from thrift stores. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645497 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 20:57:04 +0000 Gaylene 1645497@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hmm, can I just say that my experience with 25-45 year old males like those in the pictures is quite the opposite. I find most of them interesting, articulate, and thoughtful when I talk to them, despite the fact I'm old enough to be their mother--or grandmother. Yes, their interests don't necessarily coincide with mine, and sometimes they are unsure of how to initiate an interaction with an older woman, but, once I've shown some interest in learning in getting to know them, my interactions with them seem much the same as with any other age group. </p> <p>I guess we all see different things. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645463 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 17:49:41 +0000 rachylou 1645463@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Btw, I have a funny guy friend who feels boys don't get many validating at large societal messages these days or have a standard of manhood they can comprehend - all of which explains the cult status of Fightclub. Sometimes he's a riot. Of course, we're from the West Coast and the amalgamation of messaging is no doubt disconnected and disturbing. Basically no one knows what they're doing is the upshot, and I can't argue, hehe. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645462 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 17:38:16 +0000 krishnidoux 1645462@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wow Coco! What a great insight. But horrible!!!! A bell curve, if you will, of pple's social skills... with a tiny peak in the late working and early retirement years, only to fall back again... how sad. True, youth are dependent of their devices but so are we!&nbsp;</p> <p>Rachylou you crack me up! Ok I will listen to your mother. Is the French "bébé" exempt? Somehow I can't resist a guy who calls me that way. I think these guys had some out of the ordinary interesting experiences. They were all gov. workers at Foreign Affairs, with experience abroad usually. Many of them had acquired that experience even before being hired by the gov. Another had a whole education in music and played various instruments. So you'd think they would want to share it. But I really had to go insist to subtract information... maybe the problem was that precisely, they were future diplomats?&nbsp;</p> <p>I had the impression - maybe it was a false one - that their demeanor was somehow part of their attire, like they were acting the part, but which one?&nbsp;</p> <p>One girl was more normal though, yet not the extra-talkative type.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645455 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 17:27:55 +0000 CocoLion 1645455@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Krishnidoux, your post made me smile.</p> <p>I guess I do have a thought about this, it's called weak social skills. &nbsp;Is it possible that it is taking longer to acquire those given so much contact is not in person but via some sort of device? &nbsp;Then when you hit middle age, 45-65, people become much wiser about social interactions. If people are lucky they have another 10 or 20 years like this. &nbsp;But after 80, those social skills may falter again. &nbsp;(85% of people over 85 have some form of dementia.) &nbsp;At least this is my experience dealing with the public on a daily basis. &nbsp;Whenever I serve a family with extremely polite children, with good social skills, I make it a point to pull a parent aside, after they have paid for example, to tell them what a great job they've done with their kids.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645452 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 17:23:10 +0000 rachylou 1645452@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Omg, rabbit! Yes. Why doesn't anyone dance anymore? It's like the freeking symphony!</p> <p>Also, krishi baby (btw, my mother told me never to marry anyone who calls you baby ), um, Nu-Males don't have any experiences. Because they don't experience any of their experiences. You can blame that on their smartphones, but that's really just a cover story.</p> <p>Mwahaha! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645444 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 16:51:04 +0000 Janet 1645444@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Rabbit, I've been to so many of those shows! We call it the "too cool for school" crowd. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645432 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 16:05:13 +0000 rabbit 1645432@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I was thinking exactly what Janet said, so not so much a new phenomenon although my impression was that mpdg's are more male fantasy than real person. Tumblr has a certain culture and level of political awareness though - so users may have shared values.</p> <p>Heh, I'm near the upper end of the hipster age group, but I remember first noticing when no one danced at gigs any more, people would just stand there with the beer, hand in pocket and occasionally nod to the music.&nbsp;</p> <p>ETA: also yes, I think these are reddit originated stereotypes, so big grain of salt. &nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/nu-males-and-tumblrinas#post-1645414 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 15:01:25 +0000 Anonymous 1645414@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks for sharing these new monikers -- it's so hard to keep up with all this stuff.&nbsp; I love "tumblrina"!!&nbsp; And pixie dream girls is darn good, too.&nbsp; (No disrespect intended.) </p>