https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Wed, 06 May 2026 09:44:16 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169425 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 18:18:22 +0000 Polly (thunalata) 169425@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Laurie - that made me laugh! I have a lot of days of laundry and kitchen cleaning too. Not so many at the gym though... lol </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169412 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 17:53:09 +0000 Laurie 169412@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What an interesting thread. . .I guess I feel the compulsion to always be the best dressed because it gives me a little boost personally. Like adding a little excitement to my days that all too often consist of LAUNDRY or CLEANING THE KITCHEN. The need to be best dressed might not be very healthy of me. Funny, in a big city (4million) it's easy to hide in the crowd. And if I look really skuzzy I usually am on the way to the gym, on the way home from the gym or pretending that I am gonna go to the gym :)<br /> Thanks for your honesty Anne. You made me think! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169344 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 15:47:11 +0000 Polly (thunalata) 169344@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I find that the mums at the school gate seem to fit into the following categories:</p> <p>no interest in clothes/style (that was sort of me pre-YLF)</p> <p>business smart and business casual (mums who are working - me sometimes)</p> <p>MOTG Angie style (I'd like to include myself in that group now when I'm not working )</p> <p>Smartly fashionably dressed and groomed but non working mums (I think this might be the group that you're talking about).</p> <p>There's something I find a bit odd about the last group and I had been thinking about it in the last couple of weeks and then read your post. All I can think is that it's a bit like the comments Angie made about interview dressing - that the clothes should provide a good impression and then get out of the way of you. That's obviously not necessarily the case with non-interview clothes but with these people I sometimes feel that the clothes and grooming is the sum total of who they are - they don't seem to project a 'self' just an 'image' and I don't aspire to be like that. In that sense I'm happy to be the median too. What I notice is that the people who I see as stylish are ones who express their personality in how they dress - they have a look, they enjoy looking nice, they may have an expensive wardrobe or much more limited one but they take care in how they look. Those are the ones I want to be like. </p> <p>Does this fit in with anything you're saying? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169340 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 15:41:53 +0000 Christie 169340@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Angie, I know I keep coming back here because of your genuine encouragement. And I love fashion. The forum provides such good examples of what works too.</p> <p>I am fortunate to live in a small town (touristy, like Anne's) with a great Goodwill and I am able to thrift brand-new Clark's sandals, for example. While the progress is slow, I am feeling more confident in my outfits, and the best part ... having fun! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169330 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 15:23:01 +0000 anne 169330@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am bumping this because I spent a lot of time thinking it out! (And then most of you went to bed so it went off the front page) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169185 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 05:45:05 +0000 anne 169185@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>All very interesting!</p> <p>Now my small town is NOT like the small towns you are describing. It does service a farming community, but there is also a big tourist industry, many retirees, holiday houses, and Fly in Fly out workers who live here but work in the mines in remote areas. It is very fast growing (so lots of tradesmen). It is relatively expensive to live here and there are far more exclusive places not far away.<br /> But in common with many regional areas, there is a brain drain of young people. Those left are often young parents. (I am fairly old to be a mum of kids my age here) There are few work opportunities for women apart from cleaning and aged care type work.</p> <p>My kids school is slightly under the national average on social and education terms, but encompasses a huge range, from those who come to school without lunch to quite well off types. There is a similar range in fashion. Our town has expensive boutiques, as well as budget type shops.</p> <p>So when I said I was a "median dresser" I meant not that I aim to be average but that I am about in the middle of this great range, and didn't personally relate to feelings of being an overdressed mummy. Do you remember Laura's "sequins to soccer" outfit? While I haven't actually attended soccer games at our time, that outfit wouldn't have been out of place in our town (nor was it for Laura, as she said at the time).</p> <p>Angie thanks for much for the hugs etc. I think a bit part of why I am still here is because of this lovely community and lovely you!</p> <p>Of course fashion on a budget is possible, but honestly I think it takes time (to thrift, look out for bargains etc). It also takes a certain adventurousness that I am mostly lacking in. This season I already feel like I have reached my shopping threshold, not so much for financial reasons (though that is in there too, as I bought 2 pricey pairs of shoes) but just that I have spent enough time thinking about shopping and new clothes for a while. I am tired of it! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169147 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 04:12:39 +0000 Angie 169147@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Cricket, your comment rocks. </p> <p>Anne, we are back to what makes you feel fab. If you want to challenge the environmental norm - then go for it. It can be done on a very small budget. We have incredible bargain shoppers around here! Khris is probably top of the list. If you don't want to challenge the environmental norm, and would rather fit in, in your own way, that's 100% too :0).</p> <p>You might not be quite as passionate about style and fashion as the others, but you have backbone and spirit and I love that you've been with us on this forum for over two years :0) *hugging you*. Don't know what keeps you coming back but I enjoy you tremendously. Thanks for the support. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169135 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 03:45:50 +0000 MNsara 169135@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>anne &amp; cricket - I agree that small-town dress style is usually VERY casual.</p> <p>Here in MN our small-towns are usually surrounded by farms -- and farm garb, well lets just picture lots of denim and flannel shirts. Anyone who used a simple MOTG outfit in a MN small town would totally stand out. </p> <p>So it only makes sense to balance our lives (SAHM vs working outside home), budgets, and demographics (small town vs large town vs major metropolitan) with our personal inclinations. (or else you end up with a closet stuffed with great things and not enough places to wear them - not that I'd personally know anyone like that. . . )</p> <p>P.S. I also think that the major metropolitan areas on the East and West coasts are even in a style class of their own - a notch or two above major metropolitan areas elsewhere in the US </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169128 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 03:25:49 +0000 Christie 169128@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Anne, I can identify with the feeling of not becoming better dressed after several years of YLF. For me, the biggest obstacle is my limited budget but I'm trying my best at thrifting better items at Goodwill by using a more discerning eye. Unlike you, however, I can feel jealous when I see the dramatic makeovers some members here achieve seemingly overnight with fab wardrobe overhauls! </p> <p>I do not have a need to "dress up" as a SAHM in a small-town, and simply by accessorizing or layering I seem to be dressed up just a notch! My dressed up outfit today (for taking my kids to their first orthodontist appointment) was a casual skirt with cowl neck top and white denim jacket plus gladiator sandals. I do love MOTG formulas (which for me ARE dressing up)! </p> <p>So I guess I am just trying my best to balance small funds, casual lifestyle with improving my outfits ever so slowly! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169108 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 03:01:32 +0000 anne 169108@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi everyone (and thanks),</p> <p>Just wanted to say that very soon after I wrote this I started to think that I may have given the wrong impression with some of what I wrote (but I had already turned the computer off) - so thanks to Kim and Maya for asking for a bit more clarification.</p> <p>I did actually mean this just as an observation and really more related to my musings on the demographics of where I live.</p> <p>While I do think there is room for improvement in my style, I am relatively happy about where I am at. Fashion isn't really a huge passion of mine (gosh, what I am doing here!?) and I also have made a conscious choice not to spend a large percentage of what is not a very high overall budget on clothing etc. Also, as I don't work outside the home I have no need to buy a work wardrobe (And the mothers at school who look more put together do tend to be the ones who have outside jobs)</p> <p>So to summarise, I am not madly measuring myself against others etc. It was just that I didn't relate to a situation which seems to be one many of you are frequently in, and wanted to see if others were the same - and I see from what Julie and Sara said that there are.</p> <p>(Maya, I think you are right that I do have perfectionistic tendencies - but only in my thoughts. My actions are very far from perfect and tend rather to sloppiness!) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169097 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 02:42:25 +0000 florida 169097@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Agree with the ladies. Fashion should be fun and about making YOURSELF feel fab... Try not to compare yourself to others or worry about where you fall in some "style bell curve." That's not what it's about! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169095 Fri, 11 Jun 2010 02:36:55 +0000 Maya 169095@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Anne, over the years as I have read your post I have come to regard you as very much a perfectionist. Do you think that is true? Whether it's cleaning up around the house, getting dressed, losing weight, taking naps...you always seem to think you can do better than you are currently doing. That's not necessarily bad. Actually it's good to strive to do better. But I hope it doesn't cause you to feel frustrated with yourself. I agree with Kim 100%. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169028 Thu, 10 Jun 2010 23:15:43 +0000 Queen Mum 169028@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Anne- are you feeling that you don't measure up, or are you just making an observation?<br /> I agree with what Sara said... we have to dress for ourselves and do what we can within our resources (time and money both) there will always be someone better dressed than me, someone with a cleaner home, better behaved kids, a better figure... and on and on. I'll drive myself crazy and be terribly distracted from my purpose in life if I live in competition with the gal next door. I have learned that I can only do the best that I can do for today in all these areas.<br /> Your goal should be to take the care daily to make yourself feel good about how you look for the activities on hand... and not worry about what the gal next door is doing.<br /> Does that make any sense? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-169027 Thu, 10 Jun 2010 23:11:15 +0000 kaycee 169027@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>MNsara is so right, Anne. So long as your dress for YOU and how you feel most comfortable you will have the confidence to intereact with all kinds of people. For a quieter or shyer personality I think it is easier to dress in a middle of the road (or median) style in order to blend in with the crowd. Someone with a more flamboyant personality is perfectly happy to step it up a notch because the extra attention they gain from that is not so confronting. Maturity (ok....age! lol) is something that also helps you to feel more comfortable in your own style. I guess you start to realise that what anyone else thinks is not that important. It also helps to have super critical teenagers in the house who keep you on your toes stylewise. "You're not going to wear THAT....are you?" lol </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-168898 Thu, 10 Jun 2010 18:16:59 +0000 MNsara 168898@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I agree with wilson that YLF has helped me step up from "very casual to median" to "median to very stylish". </p> <p>No matter where I go, there are (almost always) others better styled/dressed/groomed than me (I live in a large metro area), but I dress for ME, so I like the way I look and have extra confidence as I interact with others. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-168843 Thu, 10 Jun 2010 14:56:14 +0000 wilson 168843@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I hear you Anne; I live in a small town (6,000 locals) and can get away with running around town in not so becoming attire because the people in my town are like family (for better or worse) and they know what kind of person I am and what kind of house I live in, etc. so there isn't much reason to try and impress. I know they already accept me. So for me dressing nicely is purely for my own delight. I tend to fluctuate evenly between feeling very well put together and a median dresser. But for me I feel its been a step up from fluctuating between being a sloppy dresser sometimes (doing errands in my sweats after running) and median dresser mainly. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-168825 Thu, 10 Jun 2010 14:26:24 +0000 RoseandJoan 168825@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think this is a very difficult question to answer Anne, sometimes I am dressed very currently when out with the girls whilst at other times I'm just dressed for a day at the park. On the whole my opinion of others is greater than my perception of myself, even when dressed well I will be acutely aware of my outfits failings (creases, bra exposure etc.) Sometimes there is little time to concentrate on my own appearance in the morning which can lead to horrendous crimes of under grooming. All in all I think I can do better but can scrub up well. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/not-the-best-dressed-mummy#post-168814 Thu, 10 Jun 2010 14:16:55 +0000 anne 168814@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Many of you mums have spoken (like in preets recent post) about being more dressed than others at the park, school etc. I just wondered if there was anyone who, like me, feels like more of a "median" dresser?</p> <p>Sure there are people at our school who go for the trackie look, but there are always others who are much nicer dressed and better groomed than I. I don't think this only reflects the fact that I am not that good at dressing myself (even after 2+ years of YLF) but also the fact that living in a smallish town (about 20 000, I think) there is a great variation in the people you encounter, as compared to living in more homogeneous city suburbs. </p>