YouLookFab Forum » Topic: Need parenting advice....

YouLookFab Forum » Topic: Need parenting advice.... https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sun, 26 Apr 2026 11:36:58 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php Echo on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1306703 Fri, 18 Jul 2014 00:43:14 +0000 Echo 1306703@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I am really late to the game here, but I am SO glad to hear you are allowing your DD to shave her legs. I asked my mum when I was young (all the other girls at school were shaving) and she said no. So I pulled out a razor and did it anyway. I cut a huge strip of skin off the front of my shin near my knee and bore the scar for many, many years. IMO, shaving is a normal part of hygiene for the majority of American women (not necessary, and I am all for personal choice); it isn't about sexualization; it is about learning to be a "normal" (in the sense of average, everyday) woman. When and if she decides to break with societal norms, she can do so at an age where she fully understands the potential repercussions of such a decision. At this age, she just wants to fit in, and there's nothing wrong with that. As for your son, his appetite is completely normal. I have two sons, and they go through phases where they consume anything and everything they can find to times when their appetites are more reasonable. And whereas protein is probably what his body needs, I restrict my kids to fruits/vegetables for snacks. They can tear through a whole watermelon or several apples or a head of raw broccoli or all of the above! Then at meals I allow them seconds or thirds on meat or a main course. But I don't allow much in terms of grains or meats for snacks. I know their bodies need what they need, but I also know that men like my DH were always allowed "meat and potatoes" to the point where when we met the only vegetables he would eat were corn and peas. I want my kids to have a wider variety and healthier diet, so I really push the fruits and vegetables. We experiment in trying to find fruits or veggies they haven't tried when we are at the store. I will sometimes allow hummus as a snack, but not much in the lines of meats and/or grains/starches. But regardless of what you choose, his appetite IS normal! Isabel on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1305391 Wed, 16 Jul 2014 20:21:00 +0000 Isabel 1305391@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ KELLY what an amazing point : " practically vs. actually'.  That is a good lesson for life in general. You are so right, of course.  SHE can see the hair and feel it. that is enough.  SARAH :  DD is tall but very skinny and straight.  She is not very developed.  Your point is a good one.  Her closest friends are more developed physically.  One wears a whole lot of make up.  They all have older sisters too.  I have taken your advice to heart about going through it with her and teaching her. It is something for us to bond over.  It also makes me seem more "reasonable" to her.   Thank you.  And thanks for the recipe too.  GIGI :  your insight really touched me.  It opened my eyes to how this stuff can affect young women into their adulthood.  I don't want her going through this alone.  Thank you so much !  Fiber it will be ! MARY :  Hard boiled eggs !  Yes, what a great idea !  Regarding DD, just like Gigi, your experience has helped me tremendously in seeing my DD's point of view.   I do not want to minimize her feelings. You are so right on this. Thank you. RABBIT :  My husband has oatmeal everyday...you would think that I would think of that as a snack too.   I had my husband come home yesterday with 5 bags of trail mix and dried fruit.  Thank you. GAYLENE : Thank you for the relief with regards to it all being normal with ravenous boys.   I have already started stocking what you and the other ladies suggested.  In fact, the other day we went for a hike and I brought whole wheat bread and peanut butter and that what his "snack".  Smoothies are brilliant.  Thanks ! TINA :  OMG !  A 6' , 13 year old. You do feel my pain.  He loves everything that you listed. I have to have more of it as snacks and not be so afraid of it.  Thank you.  Luckily, with my DD,  I think that her hair is so blonde, that the stubble will be subtle. The other good thing is that she will be in school in 8 weeks and back to pants.   LYN :  Yes, he had his physical recently. All the bloodwork was normal.  The doc said that he is going to be hungry all the time.  I just didn't know what else to feed him.  Plus he is a bit picky.  But I have such great ideas now.  I took your advice and had a "nonchalant" talk about why.  Part of it is that she saw a film that talked about women in different cultures. And that she feels she is "growing up" and should start doing more "woman" things instead of "girlie" things.   Thanks ! DIANA :  Thanks !  She opted for the NAIR.  When we researched waxing it freaked her out a bit. The minute she learned she could cut herself, she nixed the razor.  LOL  DEB : Thank you !   I realized from the answers here that "snacks" really needed to be mini meals.  LOL   Great tip about the bananas.  Because of you, I have already switched to apples and peanut butter. DEBORAH :  Thank you, dear lady !  You hit upon my concern. More specifically, the over sexualization of girls.  She is at a strange age in that some of the girls her age are still very "young" acting while others dress and act like 21 year olds.  I have had a couple of conversations with her as well as one with both my kids about self-adornment and history.  I know that you are not judging me.  :  )   I deeply appreciate your observations.  I did let her use Nair.  She did a terrible job.  And I am not sure that she saw a big enough difference to do it again.   :  )   LOL regarding your son.  I feel the same way, I cannot keep up !  Thus my post.    MONA :  Good point.   The funny thing is, I have no memory of when I started. This kind of stuff just didn't bother me. I don't know why. My daughter is much more aware and interested in what is going on around her.  Thus my turning to YLF.  : )  I may have to start going to Costco.  My bigger issue was WHAT to feed him.  But I have gotten great idea here and have already implemented many. DIANTHUS :  OMG !!!!  Whaaattttt ?  LOL.  I was afraid that I might overfeed him, but I guess boys just need it.  It is small stuff. You are so right.  Thank you !  Yes, your point and Mona's are right.  JANET :  Holy Cow. That sounds like a bet my son would relish.  He would also take the next table's leftovers.  :   )   The pediatrician thinks my son will be around 6'5".  Thank you for the suggestion to talk to her.  That is what I did. I am at peace with "our" decision.  And she feels empowered.  THISTLE :  Thanks for telling me about your MIL's experience. Your experience as a young woman also touched me deeply.  I don't won't my daughter to ever say that I just didn't want to deal with it. You reminded me that I am her side.   Thank you so much.  AZ :  She ended up going with Nair as JenA.  suggested. You are absolutely correct about being balanced  ( as so many other shared with their experiences as young women ).   I don't want my daughter to experience what you did over something that is just not a "core" family value for us.  After speaking with her, I was sure that there is nothing sexual going on. She just feels more like a "lady" and equates it with such.   : )     Yes, protein.  I have decided to mix ground turkey and hamburger.  Meatballs as one of the snack. ( I will puree and "hide" veggies in them.  ; 0  )  CLASSICALLY :  I have come to agree with you and the other ladies.  Because of what you wrote, she and I did some fun things together :  picked out nail polish, got her a curling iron....etc. I want to help usher her into womanhood.   I want to be part of the process. Thank you. I will be back later .......to finish.   :  )  Isabel on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1305366 Wed, 16 Jul 2014 19:44:58 +0000 Isabel 1305366@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Rachy.....noooooooo  !!!  It is funny how beliefs take on a life of there own despite all evidence to the contrary.  I am guilty of this.  In my culture, when you catch a "cold" , it literally means that it was temperature cold and it made you sick.  So we avoid sitting by a cold breeze or having our legs chilly, because you get "sick".  And though my mom and I know that is not true, we both still find ourselves saying it some times.  " The breeze is chilly, I might catch a cold. "   :  ( I owe a long response here.   Thank you for all the advice on the food for my son. I have already implemented some of it.  Be back in a little with my LONG response.   rachylou on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1304090 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 16:49:50 +0000 rachylou 1304090@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Lol, IK re. growing back thicker. True enough. It's like cutting your hair to make it grow faster. Or my personal fave, in the bakery, a few of the girls wear sunscreen because they think the ovens are making them too tan. Lol. Freckles on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1303967 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 15:07:47 +0000 Freckles 1303967@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Nachos are also good for an after school snack.  When my son was a teen one of his favourite after school snacks was six or so pieces of fruit and a plate of nachos just with chips, salsa and cheese done in the microwave.  Fast, easy, practically no prep.  I found the no prep thing was important when he got home after school sports, friends, etc.  Leftover pizza too.  I used to make an extra one and keep it in the fridge.  When I was available or he was more into cooking scrambled eggs with cheese, onion and herbs. Isabel on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1303956 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 14:52:46 +0000 Isabel 1303956@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Janet, hahahaha. Sorry that i haven't gotten back sooner, I have been having computer issues.   First, thank you all so much for sharing so much of your lives with me. You cannot imagine how much it helped.  I want to let you all know that I had not made a decision known to her prior to asking all of you.  So as a result of all the wonderful feedback, I non chalantly started asking questions.  I am very careful about asking what other friends are doing because sometimes they do things that I don't want her to be a part of.  I asked if she and her friends were talking about it.  She said that only one of her friends had brought up her own hair.  She said that they watched a movie at school where it said that someone women in certain cultures like to shave, others don't.  I also fear the over sexualization of girls, but many of you made me see it as a rite of growing up and one that is better to guide than to somehow make it shameful or confusing to my DD.  Interestingly enough, DS and DD and I had a very interesting conversation in the car regarding self-"adornment" and the history of it and how it can be found in every culture and at every point in history. We are having a shaving lesson today. I find the Nair thing a great option, I will have to test a part of her skin.  She has really sensitive skin.     <div> I will be back later to address each of you !!!!! XXXXXXX </div> Janet on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1303783 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 10:11:40 +0000 Janet 1303783@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I have to chuckle/cringe at comments about Nair. I tried one of those kinds of products as a teen. Followed instructions perfectly. My skin felt awful and my leg hair remained completely unfazed. Apparently I have industrial strength hair. Astrid on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1303757 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 08:11:21 +0000 Astrid 1303757@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Agree with IK and Kari! I started shaving with thirteen or fourteen. I remember that it wasn't on my mind at all and then I got some comments by friends at the swimming pool and was suddenly so self-conscious. My mum didn't like the idea very much (she doesn't shave), but she let me do it. When my sister asked me about it two years ago I went shopping for supplies with her and showed her how to do it. She's fifteen now and I know that she hasn't kept up with it. But it's her decision and she knows she can do whatever she likes in that regard. Kari on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1303667 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 03:35:57 +0000 Kari 1303667@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Ironkurtin, yes. Saying that shaving makes hair grow in thicker is like saying cutting the hair in your head makes it grow in thicker too. I think a lot of it is related to the discomfort with stubble, and also that often girls' hair does start growing more after the age that they have begun to shave. ironkurtin on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1303585 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 02:31:58 +0000 ironkurtin 1303585@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You know, it's not really true that shaving your legs makes the hair grow back thicker. It's just that stubble - no matter how you removed the hair - is unpleasant. I personally still yearn to laser my leg hair off so I could never think about it again, but so far the time and money have not karmic ally converged. Maybe someday. JenA on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1303347 Mon, 14 Jul 2014 22:27:57 +0000 JenA 1303347@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Hi Isabel, My DD started using Nair when she was in 6th grade. She did have enough hair on her legs to "shave", but I was worried that once she started..... She did say that some of her friends do it  and she really felt self conscience. We did try to tell her that it wasn't that noticeable or that it's natural but she kept asking me, so I showed her how to use Nair. In the beginning, she'd ask me to help her put it on and take it off before her shower. It lasts a while at that age. She switched to shaving her legs at 13. A few years ago, I remember speaking with a mom who had four daughters and her third was in my DD's class. I was wondering if I should get my daughter a half bra when the girls were 10/11 and she told me that she just went with the flow with these things and let her daughters wear them if they asked for them -- especially since they had older siblings. I liked her attitude and felt that if she is coming to you about something that is making her feel uncomfortable (and you can still fix it) then that is a good thing. FWIW, my 13 DD is hungry all the time too!  I swear she's grown an inch over the last month! Good luck! Jen ps. Sorry I've been so scarce on the forum. I've been checking in but haven't had much time to post. Debbie on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1303314 Mon, 14 Jul 2014 21:43:46 +0000 Debbie 1303314@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ When my stepson was growing up I kept the makings for tacos in the refrigerator at all times. I would cook up beef or chicken, have shredded lettuce, chopped tomatoes and shredded cheese on hand at all times. He could either make a salad from it all or put it in a taco shell. He also ate tons of grilled cheese sandwiches. A bottomless pit. My girls started shaving there legs right around middle school. One of mine was adamant because of PE classes and showering afterwards. This is an issue I didn't really fight because there are so many more battles throughout middle school and high school that you are going to want to fight. rachylou on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1303163 Mon, 14 Jul 2014 19:16:58 +0000 rachylou 1303163@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I would say 11 is not too young, not if her legs have grown the hair to shave. I'm a fan of the <a href="https://emjoi.com/" rel="nofollow">Emjoi </a>or threading, if you like the salon experience - both of which are basically tweezing, only fast. I don't like having the different layers of my skin ripped apart, which comes with waxing. Also, the Emjoi/threading does the opposite of coarsening the hair, at least in my experience. As for how much boys eat... my only thought is: Buy more food. More often. They cannot be filled up Neel on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1302903 Mon, 14 Jul 2014 14:50:45 +0000 Neel 1302903@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ My neices started shaving their legs at 15. I didn't shave until 24! But that was because I never wore shorts/skirts! Hairy legs are definitely embarrassing for girls whether it is visible or not! It's like the fat that we see around our midsection and thighs in the mirror that no one else seems to notice o_O. So I am a yay for waxing/shaving. My 6 yr old DS has already asked us when he could get a tattoo (his dad has a tattoo) .... Oh well. anne on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1302826 Mon, 14 Jul 2014 13:54:02 +0000 anne 1302826@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ A fascinating thread Isobel. I asked my 11 year old daughter what she thought. She doesn't shave, but thinks a few girls in her class do. She said "does she know you are talking about her on the internet?" Interesting thoughts on peanuts. I don't like them by themselves, but the other day I had this strange craving for thai curry with peanut butter in the sauce . I do like it with fish sauce and curry paste and coconut milk and sugar added! I hadn't eaten it for years Anyway I loved it so much I had some leftovers for breakfast on saturday morning and I was amazed at how full it kept me! Anonymous on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1302604 Mon, 14 Jul 2014 03:43:38 +0000 Anonymous 1302604@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ At a diabetic support group meeting recently we were told of a study where people who ate about 10 peanuts with breakfast were less likely to have that starving feeling even in late afternoon. Several who have tried it say it helps. I would also suggest beans...pinto, kidney, black, navy... Any of those types. They have protein and fiber. In summer a cold bean and tuna salad with a little onion, olive oil, whatever you have like Italian herbs, olives, grape tomatoes, etc. Ready in the refrigerator is a quick and easy lunch or snack that has staying power. My sons' favorite was quesadillas, flour tortilla grilled cheese type affairs made with retried beans spread on a tortilla, cheese sprinkled on top, then topped with another tortilla, toasted on each side in a frying pan in a little oil and served hot with sour cream and/ or salsa on top. Those miraculous beans again. Jules on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1302398 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 23:18:32 +0000 Jules 1302398@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Cottage cheese is another good protein food to have in the fridge. MsMary on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice/page/2#post-1302162 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 18:17:56 +0000 MsMary 1302162@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I think taking your DD to have her legs waxed is a great idea!  You could go together and make it a Girls' Spa Day!  pastrygirl on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1302154 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 18:07:06 +0000 pastrygirl 1302154@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Yes, MORE PROTEIN!! Protein and healthy fats are the best way to satisfy hunger. Sweets and carbs, such as fruit, won't last 10 minutes without fat and protein along with it. My boys are still young, but *I* eat a lot of protein. I aim for at least 100 grams a day, usually get closer to 150g/day, and do it with protein shakes made with unsweetened almond milk, and I also mix in some peanut butter powder. I've read that you can add PB powder to lots of things, like granola, to increase the protein content. Whenever I give my boys anything to eat, I give them protein and fat. If they want a pear, they need some peanut butter. If they want some granola, they get some almonds, too. Oh, and lentil tacos are DELICIOUS! The post above me reminded me of that. I can easily substitute beef tacos and lentil tacos, and my boys love it just the same. L'Abeille on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1302111 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 17:30:05 +0000 L'Abeille 1302111@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Re: the shaving: I started at 11 (dark and obvious hair by then) and so it wasn't an issue when my girls wanted to start. But a friend of mine took her daughters to have their legs waxed when they were around 11. Because it was so fine to begin with, and didn't grow back coarse and stubbly like after shaving, it was about 6 months before it needed a repeat. You might consider that. Re: teenage boys and eating, what everyone else said. One thing I did was to "stretch" ground beef, usually with barley, so a little would go a longer way. We still prefer our shepherd's pie that way. Or lentils or soya mince along with the meat in the pasta sauce. And so much bread! I used to buy the marked-down 3 lb bags of rolls at the end of the day and they would vanish. When my son left home I couldn't understand why the bread all went mouldy so fast... Kari on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1302026 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 16:06:07 +0000 Kari 1302026@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I remember starting 6th grade and being the only girl in my gym class who hadn't started shaving my legs over the summer. Blonde body hair regardless, I was mortified. That was decades ago so I wouldn't be shocked at 11 year olds shaving today. My mom eventually got me a razor with some sort of wire wrapped around the blades to prevent accidental cuts. She was careful to emphasize that I had to be sure I wanted to start shaving because of the discomfort/stubble when hair starts to grow back, and making sure I knew how to shave slowly and safely. I know others who started shaving legs with an electric razor as a safety precaution as well. Joyce B on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1301948 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 14:16:38 +0000 Joyce B 1301948@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I think waxing may be better for her than shaving. The idea of the cold wax strips that someone suggested may prevent the hair from getting thicker because of shaving. I would try that first. Your boy is having a growth spurt. It sounds like he is going to be a tall one. My son was like that and is 6'4" tall now. All I can say is just keep on feeding him. He is growing faster than he can eat... It's hard on both of you but things will be fine. He can afford double portions, lucky boy. Jjsloane on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1301929 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 13:30:10 +0000 Jjsloane 1301929@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I have not hit that decision yet with my DD but there is some very good advice here. I too wish I'd never started shaving and never my thighs, but admit I would not have listened to that advice at that age.  Protein for the boy for sure. Would he eat beef (or turkey) jerky? Maybe put the banana and some protein powder in a smoothie? My kids both go through growth times where they eat like there is no tomorrow. We are fortunate we can feed them when this happens.  Hugs to you Isabel! Beth Ann on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1301793 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 04:44:59 +0000 Beth Ann 1301793@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Tonight, my family was invited to a family's house for a little fishing (my kids had never fished, and these new friends were so wonderful for taking them on their small lake).  We shared dinner with them, and my 12 year old DS --- 5' tall and around 90 lbs, ate a burger and two hot dogs before I could blink.  I see this happen, and I know a growth spurt is coming!  Since he's slender and takes a medication that makes diminishes his appetite (yeah), I try to keep healthy choices available that have lots of staying power:  almond butter, eggs (he cooks his own), yogurt, bananas and berries, oatmeal.  It's crazy! My DD is also 12 and she looks older.  Since she's Asian, her body hair, while dark, isn't prolific.  I did however, just let her pierce her ears and get an email account (no smart phone and no facebook).  More important than any single parenting decision is the relationship that we cultivate in these years.  We are constantly supporting them and keeping them close while simultaneously helping them grow in independence and discover their unique gifts and values.   It's fascinating, but exhausting, and their is no handbook to follow!  Dee on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1301761 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 04:01:45 +0000 Dee 1301761@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I do not have kids, but I remember not being allowed to shave until I was in 8th grade. Most of friends had started a bit earlier and I was very self conscious about it at the time. Even if it's not noticeable to you, it's probably very obvious to your daughter. qfbrenda on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1301590 Sun, 13 Jul 2014 00:16:15 +0000 qfbrenda 1301590@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I would let her shave. It's not that big of an issue. I have 5 boys between 7 and 17 yrs old and trust me, they EAT. My 7 yr old literally is hungry every 2 hours. My newborns could last longer than that!  I ditto what everyone else has said about keeping healthy food in the house, and plenty of it. I keep lots of yogurt, cheese sticks, peanut butter, eggs, homemade granola, fruit, and sandwich makings around all the time. Our food budget is scary! But trust me, they are easier to deal with if they are well fed. My guys get "hangry" if they get too hungry. Glory on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1301575 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 23:35:53 +0000 Glory 1301575@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I have a son, 17 and 2 daughters, 14 and 13. They eat me out of house and home. Always hungry. I make dinner, 1 hour later they are back. My grocery bill is eye watering (those are my tears). Some kids are just really hungry, especially if they have lots of sports/activities. I have recently added smoothies to the mix which the kids can make themselves. I have purchased frozen fruits which I package into 1/2 cup servings and keep in the freezer. Also, hemp hearts which are loaded with protein and all 3 kids like them. They add milk, hemp hearts, banana and frozen fruit, sometimes peanut butter.  As for the shaving, makeup, bras etc. Both girls started shaving in grade 6. I didn't love it but it wasn't the hill I wanted to battle on. I took them shopping for an excellent razor and taught them how to do it. I included underarms in this teaching. I asked them to please consider not shaving the thigh. I did not feel they needed to shave but both felt quite sure that they did. DonnaF on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1301468 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 20:01:25 +0000 DonnaF 1301468@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ The shaving could be a peer pressure thing and/or personal self-consciousness.  I don't think she's too young because I remember conversations with tons of (straight) women and virtually all of us at around the same age used to sneak and shave our legs and cut them to ribbons even if our moms did not did not sanction shaving.  Plus, you will probably have larger more important battles in the future.  Oh, and when I was in college in the early '70s, the big feminist thing was not to shave legs or pits.  I finally figured out that feminism should mean having a choice and that I should not feel bullied into going *natural*.  I resumed shaving and wearing a bra. As to your son:  Old-fashioned oats and steel cut oats keep me the fullest the longest when it comes to breakfast.  Look for all you can eat places when he goes out for a meal?  Nutritional advice probably goes in one ear and out the other when they are that age, but I hope he gets in the habit of eating smart.  At some point, his metabolism will slow down and bad nutritional choices will catch up with him.  Classically Casual on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1301461 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 19:53:25 +0000 Classically Casual 1301461@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I say, pick your battles. Personally, shaving leg hair wouldn't be one of mine. I do wish that my own mother had tried to teach some of the fun of growing into a woman. Everything was serious business at our house. My period started when I was ten, so I hope I was shaving by eleven, but I don't remember. Aziraphale on "Need parenting advice...." https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/need-parenting-advice#post-1301405 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 18:08:27 +0000 Aziraphale 1301405@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Isabel, if my daughter wanted to shave her legs, I'd hand her a razor, blond hair or no. Eleven's not that young. Many girls are menstruating already, so turning into women. I have a daughter too, who will be eleven at the end of this year. It hasn't occurred to her to shave yet, but there have been a few other things, like ear piercing. I've always tried to strike a balance with these kinds of things. I don't want to encourage her to grow up too fast, but I also don't want her to feel like the only girl who's not allowed to do stuff. I was that girl -- the very last to be allowed those rites of passage, like get my ears pierced, wear lipstick, etc -- and I can remember how dorky and left-out I felt. (Plus, it made me conceal things from my mom. If you're not allowed to do things that everyone else is doing, sometimes you find a way to do it in secret). Try being the ONLY girl in class who doesn't shave her legs. I actually remember that one -- I was sitting on a grassy hill at lunch with a bunch of girls, and one of them noticed my hairy blond shins and gleefully ridiculed me. You're going to need a lawnmower for those, girl. It wasn't gentle ribbing -- it was the kind of mocking meant to exclude. Fitting in is important at that age. If the other girls are doing it, I let my daughter to it, too, as long as it's not physically dangerous or ridiculously sexual. If there's something I'm not so sure about, I check in with the other moms and see what their take is. Like, when three or four other girls -- daughters of women whose judgment I respect -- got their ears pierced, I let my daughter do it, too. But did I let her wear makeup to her grade five school leaving ceremony? No. (Even though a few other girls were wearing quite a lot. But the girls wearing makeup were daughters of the moms who have iffy judgment. The "sensible" moms were on my side for this one!).  Anyway, the way I see it, shaving your legs is a step toward adulthood, but it's harmless.  As for your son, all I can say is, I've heard that lots of teenaged boys are perpetually famished. I guess all you can do is feed him! He body must need the red meat. It's putting on muscle at a rapid rate, as his testosterone levels rise. He needs the protein.