YouLookFab Forum » Topic: My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?

YouLookFab Forum » Topic: My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do? https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sun, 12 Apr 2026 14:29:51 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php Elizabeth P on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855632 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:51:00 +0000 Elizabeth P 1855632@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Sorry for being so late to comment on this Lisa, I've been swamped both at home and work, and finding time to comment properly is difficult.  But I want to. First, add me to the (many) people that think you DO have a great sense of style.  You really do.  I think you could make a paper bag look stylish.   But that doesn't mean that you aren't allowed to be bored! You mentioned sometime ago, somewhere, that you had lost some weight, so I was really hoping that would have helped bring you our of your funk, but it doesn't seem to have.  I hope you do feel a bit better about your body now though, as that was driving you nuts.  You have mentioned several times in this post that you want to have a smaller wardrobe.  However... I'm not convinced that this is a solution for YOU.  This:  "In striving to cut back on wasteful purchases, and to keep a tighter closet, I have sucked all of the fun out of my closet"  really struck a chord with me.  I think it is extremely difficult (not impossible, just takes a ton of time and work) to have a small, interesting closet.  I notice this whenever I play with packing capsules, or just capsules in general... the clothes I choose are versatile, not fun.  They are the essentials, the backdrops. Clothes that are "interesting" don't make the cut... yet I'm not interested in getting rid of them.  Thus my larger wardrobe. So perhaps you need to add in some great statement pieces, that will add back that sense of fun for you.  Or perhaps, if small is really what you want, you need more time (and work)  to figure out exactly how to pull some statement pieces (and what they might be) into your cohesive set of clothing.  lyn67 on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855596 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 11:01:07 +0000 lyn67 1855596@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I don't find your style boring, but if you feel so -no help! This struck with me, too. I sometimes feel the same: "I can quite happily tell everyone else what to do, but I don't seem to be able to practice what I know and have learned" and that " I have many nice (..) quality    things, but they are all versions of one another." So, will study the comments later for the cure. ETA: Are you a creative person, Lisa? Is dressing for the day one of the few or  the only creative outlet for you in your life? Think deeper and maybe this can explain your feelings. I think it is one of my possible reasons, which unfortunately cannot help at, yet. But for you, what about dressing others for a hobby or even part of living??  krishnidoux on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855522 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 01:31:58 +0000 krishnidoux 1855522@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Lisa, I'm back late in this conversation.  To pick up from your one-minute on-the-spot outfits: The cinema outfit: I purposely chose imagining going to the movies precisely because this is when comfort is the first thing that comes to mind and eclipses all else. Since you had expressed a longing for comfort in your style, I was curious to know how comfort translates for you. So I see you are similar to me, and pick leggings that will keep legs warm with a soft but "sheathing" effect (English is not my first language). You want comfortable feet that let you run and you seem to feel better in a darker color top. I think you should keep this in mind in building new outfits.  Here is my suggestion: try black leggings and a cute, dark colour silk tee as a base. With this on, you are comfortable. Then you can think of topping layers that will let you move freely: a flowing skirt, a tunic, or even hot pants/ high waist shorts... add some jewelry, to balance the look, so not to seem overwhelmed, but keep flat footwear, such as cute, clean tennis shoes. Add a topper, it could be cropped, to create contrast with the piece underneath, or oversized, to match it. It's just a suggestion, but I also read your grievance. There certainly is a great outcome to this temporary distress. Can't wait for it!  Anonymous on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855513 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 01:10:31 +0000 Anonymous 1855513@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz - YES. I have indeed sucked all the life and emotion out of my wardrobe. I am always so convinced that I need to be better at everything that I take it to the extreme at times, and take all of the fun out things.  Today, in retaliation , I am wearing a navy sweatshirt with tiny pom poms all over it. No one called the cops, and I managed just fine   anne - me to. I think if I had to choose, I'd take a small wardrobe and risk being mad at it once in awhile, over a closet full of stuff that doesn't get worn much.   sara - good point about the temperature swings. Even up here, it's the norm in spring and fall, and when I think about it, I never quite feel put together during those weeks. Always a hot mess.   Ginger - it's not quite winter here all year long  But yes, mood dressing plus 4 seasons = need for a few more clothes.  $$. Jenn - you and I share the exact same brain and wardrobe philosophy. I too am terrified of too many complements - lol.  Too many decisions to make. jill58- thanks  for the kind words, and yes, adding texture, shine, etc rather than a bunch of kooky colour may be a better solution for me. As long as the texture and shine is not in more gray or black ;) jill58 on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855496 Tue, 24 Oct 2017 23:44:39 +0000 jill58 1855496@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Lisa, I haven't had time to comment either but I too relate to what you're saying, however, I find your WIWs so unboring, that it's hard for me to even think about a solution. You always look wonderful -- stylish without looking trendy. I too gravitate toward black and other dark neutrals and I was very interested in Brooklyn's ideas which would work for me too. I like color in small doses -- really only in accessories, but texture, shine, interesting design details, etc.. appeal to me a lot. Anyway, no particular advice -- honestly, your style seems so well developed, but I would guess that most of us have had bad moments in a dressing room.  Jenn on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855397 Tue, 24 Oct 2017 14:17:27 +0000 Jenn 1855397@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Oh Lisa, I haven't had time to comment the past few days (crunch time for me), but I had an "I'm bored" crisis just a few weeks ago, so I very much relate. I was really struck by smittie's comment above about acknowledging the occasional boredom with a smaller wardrobe and choosing to live with it. That's just so WISE. It's bizarre that sometimes my wardrobe feels incredibly limiting, and other days the same collection of clothes feels like an embarrassment of riches.  I join others in saying that the outfits you post here are FAR from boring, so I don't think you need to start over from scratch. You probably just need a seasonal refresher. I can't offer any advice better than Angie's, though. I understand the wisdom of her suggestion of adding a complement in a new color, but personally, that terrifies me a little. A complement in this color and a complement in that color and (in my mind) my wardrobe is suddenly an out-of-control mess. It works better if I think small and seasonally, and go in with the intent to wear the heck out of whatever new concept/color/statement I add....which may come back full-circle to creating that complement to give it the best chance of success. Ginger on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855322 Tue, 24 Oct 2017 03:59:37 +0000 Ginger 1855322@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ *raises hand* May I enroll myself as another mood dresser? The Texas inverse of Suz and you, Lisa. (Instead of an endless winter, it's an endless summer.)  But I'm totally a mood dresser. I can't plan ahead more than a day at a time; trip capsules are a stupidly hard challenge. Except in endless summer, the weather is SO varied it's hard to balance both that and mood.  And even right now, when fall weather is getting started, I have no idea what to wear. I've been looking forward to cool weather since May, and now I don't know what to do with myself. Nothing feels right. It's a real thing! I accept that it's okay. And that a "small" wardrobe for personalities and climates like ours, may not be the same small as for someone else. Sara L. on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855305 Tue, 24 Oct 2017 02:33:04 +0000 Sara L. 1855305@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ This is a fascinating thread that I've been following with interest. I don't really have anything to add that hasn't already been said. Fall (and to a lesser extent Spring) always cause me problems. I'm not good at dressing for the big temperature swings that are common here. It's the time of year when I'm least satisfied with my wardrobe. anne on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855299 Tue, 24 Oct 2017 02:18:59 +0000 anne 1855299@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Lisa, I've not had much YLF time of late BUT I'm ready every update of this thread. Your questions really do bring out so much wit and wisdom from this forum. Of course I think you look wonderful! I do however, relate to being a bit bored at the moment. As smittie said  "Aso, I have a minimalist wardrobe (by American standards ;-)) and I definitely get bored. I still prefer this method to having too many clothes"— Suz on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855253 Tue, 24 Oct 2017 00:27:13 +0000 Suz 1855253@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I am TOTALLY a mood dresser. That is why I can't plan outfits in advance, except for trips or big events when I pretty much have to. For me, mood is often tied to weather... but not completely. So I have to have the outfit that fits mood AND weather, which in Canada turns out to be a big ask. Ha ha, who knew?  Another way that Angie is smart is that she never tells us to take away emotion from our dressing. Channel it, sure. Educate it, maybe. But never remove it. It's our moods and our strange loves and our no-nevers that really define our style, no?  Greyscale, I love that idea of the "false positive" or decoy style! And yes, the docent lady is one of mine...I think I might actually enjoy dressing that way 20 years from now and it might suit me then. But now it is all wrong for me, except for a few features -- some architecture, a few great accessories... Anonymous on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855247 Tue, 24 Oct 2017 00:14:01 +0000 Anonymous 1855247@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ "We" (in the publishing industry world)  have an inside joke about the look Greyscale describes above .  It's a slippery slope my friends, and Suz knows all about it.  I have given out a directive to my closest friends to take away my debit and credit cards if I start wearing linen kaftans and kooky /arty Euro shoes whilst owning a bookstore ;)  The Cat - it was no accident, I did it on purpose. It's too long and uninteresting an explanation .  I wrestle internally /ethically with the whole world of shopping and acquiring and also with body image .   Sometime it gets the better of me.   But back to the colour suggestions - I love your ideas and am already thinking ahead to what I might look for .  Amber is a pretty stone, and not one I own.  Good idea too. Thank you!  Thank you Lynette :)  Suz - thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts. Much appreciated, my friend.  You're so right about these transitional seasons - never thought about  how short Fall can be and unpredictable at that.  Maybe I am feeling blasé about everything right now, and not just my wardrobe.  I'm in a big transition with my work right now, have recently  made a major change to my diet and lifestyle (quit alcohol completely) and am just totally out of sorts.  Thanks for bringing it back into perspective.  I still refuse to open the closet to a bigger wardrobe, because I only want to own what I can wear, and not be left with a bunch of stuff every other season or so  that is hardly worn or not fitting or that I've changed my mind about. I give away WAY too much stuff as it is.  My challenge will be to stop repeating the things I know how to buy (black sweaters and jeans) and buy other things instead.  Am I the only one here who is so fickle about clothes?  Many , many things in my closet I would never buy again if they were in front of me in a store.  Most things, in fact.  And lastly - about my temporary obsession with Chicover50 - yeah, I admit I want to be super fit and bouncing around in  every weird outfit imaginable and having the time of my life.  Who wouldn't ?  Sigh. The mood dressing is probably the comment that hit me the most - and you're right: what is wrong with that?  I thought the goal was to stick to a program and not be so flaky.  Glad to hear it's not a requirement.   Oh Angie - what would I do without you? When you aren't driving me crazy, I'm in awe of you  Allure - snort.  I'm printing out your last list and hanging it inside my closet door. Your list and characterizations are pretty dead on - which is remarkable considering we've never met !  rachylou on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855212 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 22:16:20 +0000 rachylou 1855212@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Ok... that's a whole new thread: False Positives for style... My list is long... lol! Greyscale on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855210 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 22:09:08 +0000 Greyscale 1855210@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Suz, thanks for the category "docent lady"! I know exactly what look you mean, and I think of it as the shadow style of my future self -- arty linen, lots of Eileen Fisher, quirky European leather shoes. Overlap with Lagenlook but more crafty accessories. I've seen this style with the quirkiness dialed up or down. Certainly not a negative descriptor -- but it turns out it's not actually my style, at least not now, and if I buy too much in this direction, I'll be displeased with my look. Isn't it funny how we can each have these "near miss" styles that are almost but not quite ourselves? False positives, decoys, whatever you want to call it. I always think I wear rocker looks but it turns out I actually avoid ornamentation like buckles and studs. One classic biker jacket and a pair of motorcycle boots are as much as I should own in that direction. The Cat on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855204 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 21:41:07 +0000 The Cat 1855204@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Lots of great advice here. You have never LOOKED boring. Quite the contrary. You are one of few people I have seen who always manage to look exciting in neutrals, thanks to your personal style, which exudes creativity, drama and individuality. However, I support the idea of lightening up your darkest neutrals. I imagine that you would look especially great in neutrals like cream, camel, bronze, toffee, coffee, mahogany and pewter, as well as all shades of olive. Plus non-neutrals like peach, coral and violet/purple. And I guess you are one of the lucky ones on whom the classic brown-ish leopard print looks gorgeous. As for jewellery, have you ever tried amber? It is beautiful, rustic, timeless and unique, and I bet it would look amazing with your personal colours. I was sorry to read that you lost your veteran status, your finds, etc., and wonder how that could happen. (You don't need to answer if you find this too personal or off topic. I totally respect that you may have your reasons. But if you have any information to us newcomers about how to avoid such accidents--or whatever it was--that would be appreciated.) I look forward to see how your style will evolve, and am convinced that you will continue to be a source of inspiration to us others. Lynette on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855202 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 21:36:04 +0000 Lynette 1855202@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Lisa, I am late in seeing your post and can't possibly add to all the wisdom that had been shared. But I just wanted to say that you are one of a handful of women that I "follow" here on YLF because I LOVE your sense of style- your clothes, your makeup, your shoes, your beautiful accessories, your hairstyle, and the way you put it all together has been an inspiration to me! I wish you all the best as you go forward with your style journey. I'm excited to see what you come up with! Suz on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855197 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 21:03:15 +0000 Suz 1855197@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I'm very late to this amazing thread. Lisa, I am sorry the "I hate my wardrobe" mood hit you, but glad for all these insightful, thoughtful comments, which I am going to bookmark for the next time the mood hits me-- which is likely to be tomorrow! I don't know about you, but I *always* find the transitional seasons tricky. I get all excited about the beautiful new things in the shops, but either I don't buy them, or don't buy the right complement to make a proper outfit, or do buy them but don't get to wear them because the weather won't cooperate, or I don't seem to have the right occasion. So, lo and behold, partway into the season, I end up in a dressing room, hot and sticky and feeling blah in my worst sweater while some young SA looks at me dubiously as if to suggest I need my head examined. Yeah. I have been there, too.  Winnipeg and Kingston transitional seasons tend to be so short, you know? And the clothes are the best!! I love love love spring clothes (but typically have all of about 2 weeks a year to wear them) and love love love love autumn (as distinct from winter) clothes...and typically have about 3 weeks to wear them. Does this ring a bell at all? There's a reason you have such a fantastic coat wardrobe, my friend. You are smart!!  Anyway. The advice you got sounds right on to me. (Light neutrals! texture and shine! consignment shops...with realistic expectations of that...and especially local designers -- great idea, Liz!!) But especially Angie's advice to accept yourself. Accept that you are a mood dresser (what's wrong with that? Aren't we all, to some extent?) Accept (maybe) that a teeny tiny wardrobe isn't for you? (In our climate, maybe what counts as "small" is different than what counts as small in a climate that stays the same all year?) Accept your own "commanding beauty" (gorgeous phrase, Viv!)  and go with what makes you happy, as Angie said.  I suspect what appeals in that blogger is the appearance of energy and happiness. She's vibrant, yet she is making no secret of her age; she's energetic without being young. And she's having fun. Fun seems to have been in awfully short supply for a lot of us this past year, alas...for many reasons both personal and more general. Of course it appeals! No wonder! Maybe the word "transition" is also relevant here. Somehow...for me, anyway, at this age...it seems harder to inject a sense of fun without looking like the dreaded "mutton dressed as lamb"....or a docent lady. Not that I have anything against docent ladies. But that kind of "arty" style doesn't feel authentic to everyone and it certainly doesn't strike me as your style.  Also, I suspect we all have days like the one that got you writing this post. I certainly do. Days when I think, if I have to wear that pair of jeans and sweater one more time, I'm going to scream. Sometimes that means it's time for a style evolution. And sometimes it means that I need a new pair of earrings, a haircut, or a good brisk walk to knock the cobwebs out of my head!  Angie on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855172 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 19:47:06 +0000 Angie 1855172@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Sterling, thank you and good to know.  Lisap, you've learned something about yourself already: <ul> <li>MOOD dresser</li> <li>You need variety but pinpoint where? Sounds like you want other types of neutrals. No more black. </li> <li>A MODERATE wardrobe. Small bores you, but big ovewhelms you and makes you feel bad about having too much stuff.  </li> <li>Create complements</li> <li>Self Accept</li> <li>Focus on YOU, not others and how they relate back to you</li> </ul> Create your Core Style: <ul> <li>List the elements in an outfit that make you happy (My stab: neutrals, jewellery, structure, trendy shoes, make-up, something unexpected, sassy short hair....)</li> </ul> Practically: <ul> <li>Keep on looking at what you have and what you like about these items or outfits. Dig deep - WHY do you like them? </li> <li>What do you want to project? Casual Chic, Sophistication, Professionalism, Polish, Creativity, Playfulness, Authority, (ALLURE - *big smile and wink*)</li> <li>Find the ways to build onto what you have. Take it one item category at a time.  </li> </ul> Style starts and ends with a strong self of yourself. The more in tune you are with your feelings - the easier it is to create a style that makes you happy and evolves when you evolve. Sal on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/3#post-1855159 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 18:50:59 +0000 Sal 1855159@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ So late to this that I feel my thoughts will be repetitive. Lots of wisdom, kindness and fun!! Good luck Lisa- I also feel these pushes and pulls towards youth, minimalism, budget, fashion, lifestyle, climate..... Anonymous on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855151 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 18:15:25 +0000 Anonymous 1855151@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Angie -- your point-by-point practical suggestions are GREAT.   I too am saving this post for future reference.   Kari on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855148 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 18:09:20 +0000 Kari 1855148@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Lisa: "about once a year I have a meltdown and hate everything I wear. Must stop that." I wouldn't say stop it so much as realize that this IS a typical pattern for you, and don't be thrown when it happens. Maybe you'll notice what tends to lead up to that dissatisfaction, or maybe it will just be like "ok, that happened before. It's not fun, but Here's what helped me get through it last time." Just an idea (thinking of my own seasonal struggles and identifying triggers over time!) Anonymous on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855122 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 16:55:45 +0000 Anonymous 1855122@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I think we all find ourselves in that spot.  Your style is great, it should be you not what anyone else thinks.  It's not whats on the outside, but inside that counts.  You seem to have that going for you.  Stiff upper lip as the English say.  And we can't compare ourselves to bloggers, after all that is their job, Fashion, so they do need a more expansive wardrobe than the average person. Anonymous on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855116 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 16:37:13 +0000 Anonymous 1855116@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Gradfash - interesting question ...not sure what the answer is. smittie - yes, you and i with our smaller Canadian wardrobes  And your reasoning for a smaller wardrobe is the same as mine.   Isabel - your comments are so thoughtful, thank you. I think you have  something about looking at the here and now, rather than always wishing for what was in the past. And yes to softer neutrals! Jenni - I deleted my old profile and started again. Don't ask - I'm an emotional wing nut sometimes .  I am not one to settle for anything - but that's my personality - which can be a problem, I know. Brooklyn- you're right in that brights are not my thing other than in small doses. Again - loving the suggestion to add in pale, soft neutrals with some texture. Boy I want to go shopping right now!! Deborah - you're so insightful, as usual. Lots to consider in what you've written.  Thinking about who and what I want to project is a key thing .  greyscale - " think less and trust more".  ME?? I think you're right - ha.  I'm not looking for an immediate fix - and thanks for reminding us all of that.   Anonymous on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855115 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 16:22:14 +0000 Anonymous 1855115@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I cannot get over how smart and insightful you ALL are. There is a reason I keep coming back to YLF for help when I need/want it.  Also kind .  Did I mention that?  And I am laughing at skylurker's suggestion that you all have heard this refrain from me before. I think she's right - about once a year I have a meltdown and hate everything I wear.  Must stop that. Angie - I have ventured into on-line shopping more this year, and have had some success with it. Of course, we have to pay for shipping and returns so it's still not the great option it is in the US.  I like the idea of building little complements instead of entire capsules - that I can do. I used to do this years ago and stopped doing it when I got into my minimal mode.  I still push back at having a large wardrobe and I do not want to go down that path at this point in my life.  I am quite fervent about it as it goes against many of my values .  Because I don't work in an environment where I see the same people 5 days a week, and need to dress up for those 5 days, I don't need nor want a bunch of clothes that won't get worn very often.  It's interesting about being a moody dresser. I never considered that, and I realize how true that is.  Maybe that's part of the issue: not having a certain look to rely on?  I am particularly drawn to the idea of pale neutrals.  I was looking at some photos this weekend of fall outfits based on taupes, ivories, pale greys etc - all with texture and lightness. So pretty.  This is really appealing and should be easy enough to experiment with .  Metallics and velvets too.  Sigh - I only wish I had the big budget to go along with it!   Kari - I really like your thoughts on paying attention to what makes me feel good and WHY.  Underwear is a big part of that, and an area that I'm not good at.  Need to priorize this.   Vivian - YES to having a different body daily.  This up and down business is so weird. Which is why my dressing is so moody - definitely influenced by how puffed out I feel on any given day. And thanks for your ongoing support and commiseration, my friend - it means a lot. I'll be crying in my closet along with you today   Texstyle - I agree with the idea of adding in a small amount of one specific new colour.  And I can definitely see how coral would work for you . It's one of my favourites in summer. LaP - I'm going to check out some consignment and even vintage shops (as to your comment about finding a low-cost way to experiment) .  We have one particularly renowned one here in Wpg that visiting movie wardrobes use.  Could be a fun hobby too. ChristinaF , Robin F . Muffin , Sterling -  glad some of this resonates with other women too , and yes , I'm considering the internal reasons for my sense of frustration - lots to consider here. Toban - nice to hear from a fellow Manitoban!  I wonder if it is weather/seasonal. Very good point. approprio - wow, thank you for your thoughtful comments, and I particularly like the idea of becoming more involved in my local fashion design scene. I follow it peripherally, and am totally interested, as you can imagine, but always feel shy about getting more involved because I can't back up my interest with buying stuff.  I need to investigate this more..... And as to self-acceptance? I don't even know what that is. Seriously. Angie on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855107 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 15:27:44 +0000 Angie 1855107@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ VERY happy to hear that you've edited, Lisa. Now I don't need to fly over. *smiling*. I've read the thoughtful responses. AMAZING. Thanks for the kind words Krishnidoux and Smittie.  Personally and professionally, I am sticking with look inward because that's where effective, authentic, manageable and killer style starts and ends. Many touched on this in tangents. Good job! Time to review and assess the wardrobe. UNDERSTAND what you are feeling and what you want to project with your style. Be honest, but not overly critical. Channel your emotions into organized energy and get going. <ul> <li>Skylurker is bang on the money. You are a mood dresser who likes modern classic one day, trends the next, and avant-garde after that. (You also used to like Athleisure but I'm not sure where you stand on that now?) Sometimes colours, always dark neutrals. Lots of attention to make-up, jewellery and shoes. A bigger wardrobe is not a bad idea - but you have to be organized about it. Tanya comes to mind immediately. She has a huge wardrobe and lots of shadow styles  - and manages it absolutely perfectly. </li> <li>I loved what Janet said about "settling" - like she has, and is reaping the reward. And also with a big wardrobe. </li> <li>Approprio's reference to self-acceptance is important. You will find settling on a style and shadow styles easier if you accept that who you are is fabulous - YOUR way. </li> </ul> Practically, I would like to make the following quick suggestions on how to start: <ul> <li>Pinpoint WHERE do you want variety? Is it colour, item, texture, silhouette, accessory, footwear, or vibe? </li> </ul> <ul> <li>Think about your figure flattering priorities. Make sure you pander to them. </li> </ul> <ul> <li>Pull out what you have and look at the palette. Is it too dark? Do you want to add a little bright? How about light neutrals? New to you neutrals? PATTERNS! (Separate Fall & Winter to make it more manageable). </li> </ul> <ul> </ul> <ul> <li>Look at your bottoms - what's missing? Make sure you relate bottoms back to footwear because you are particularly picky about the shoes you wear in a season. And Canadian Winters are rough. </li> </ul> <ul> <li>Assess your footwear. What is missing? </li> </ul> <ul> <li>Look at tops. What do you need? No more black sweaters! Try something new!</li> </ul> <ul> <li>Build complements if capsules are too complicated, especially when you're adding a new colour to your wardrobe. </li> </ul> <ul> <li>Be PATIENT (I know it's hard). Create something you can build on season after season. </li> </ul> Creating pinboards is all very well - and so is looking at what other bloggers or Fabbers wear. But you have to relate it back to YOU, your wardrobe, and into outfits that you can wear daily.  As for shopping - agreed. Canada hasn't got what the US has. I want to encourage shopping online because there is a MUCH larger assortment. But you need to do that the suitable Canadian way. Canadian bloggers might be helpful there.  Kari on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855105 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 15:11:57 +0000 Kari 1855105@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Lisa, I'm sorry you are feeling so frustrated. I don't see boring at ALL when I look at you; I see impeccable fit and tailoring and fun, arty accessories. I see what I wish I was able to pull together but end up being more kooky and playful. I'm "favorite-ing" this thread because even though I am having a lot of fun with style at the moment, that's not always true and I felt like I was bored/boring/not feeling it for most of the past few years. A lot of wisdom in this thread that I can't add much to. I will share a little about what helped me. • Just exist in my current wardrobe for a while and not feel that I have to feel/dress fabulous every day. Sounds dumb, but giving myself permission just to have a basic, ok, not perfect outfit felt freeing. That's partly why I took a lot of time off here. The drive to have fun wasn't there. Give myself permission not to feel "current" or trendy. • Consider which current pieces I actually don't like, and why. Cut, fabrication, fit, color. Sometimes a piece wasn't right. So I would prioritize those pieces to replace with something that was ideal and checked all boxes. • Consider which pieces most impact my feeling confident/good. For me, eyewear and bras have a big impact on this. I don't skimp on my budget in those areas and slow-buy only when something is a perfect 10. Certain colors-forest green, burgundy, cobalt-impact this, and a HUGE part of my wardrobe contains those colors. • Acknowledge that a big part of my style persona is dressing the way I want to feel/project externally even if I often don't feel that way. I love rich or bright colors and many bold prints; they project happiness to me. However, I'm not a naturally very happy, buoyant, optimistic person. Visuals actually can kick me out of a shallow funk or make me smile when I otherwise feel lousy. I know that about myself and go with it. Since late 2015 or so, I reached a point where I'm pretty happy with the "staples" of my wardrobe, but if you look at the overall shapes and colors I wear, it's very consistent, and could be "boring." I have two basic uniforms and only vary the exact pieces or the accessories, or replace what's getting worn out. But I don't feel bored wearing it. viva on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855104 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 15:03:25 +0000 viva 1855104@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Also, can I just add that for me, one of the challenges to feeling good in my clothing is that my shape seems to fluctuate very slightly but meaningfully almost on a DAILY basis. So something that fit well and felt great a couple of days ago just will not work on my body today. I know that's not about style, but it is about dressing and about the emotional component of working with what's in the closet, and it makes it all harder in the 50+ world. texstyle on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855100 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 14:54:21 +0000 texstyle 1855100@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ lisap - I wonder, do you have one favorite non-neutral color? I felt like I was having a hard time getting some color back into my mostly neutral closet over the past year or so and finally I decided to just try a slightly dusty shade of coral top to see --- right away I realized how much more "alive" it made me look. I've worn that top at least 4 times already. And there I was thinking maybe it was my choice of blush color making me feel washed out. lol.  I added another patterned top with some of the same coral color and again felt much happier when I put it on. I'm only making small steps because I rarely find the "just right" shade of color that I enjoy, but I think it's important to focus on adding color slowly and maybe only in small doses (part of a pattern instead of the whole top for example).Or a necklace with some color to add just a touch... I echo others suggesting adding more shades of white to your wardrobe too as it's a great way to add some vibrancy without color. I like to add various shades of white jewelry too - but it has to be the right piece, I don't like anything that looks plastic or overly embellished or too ethnic as it seems to overwhelm me. I like organic, natural looking pieces mostly. And as to body image - hanging out over the weekend with a group of friends and some new people in a similar age bracket (some older too) was a nice thing to remind me - we ALL are getting a little older, softer (both in a physical and social sense), rounder in many cases, a little wrinkled, etc. - - - while I was there I can't really remember feeling any concern about what I was wearing or how I looked. No one made comments about other people's clothing - no questions like "Oh that looks great, where did you get it?" --  I thought back to about fifteen years ago when that would have been asked multiple times at most gatherings. LaPed on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855088 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 14:37:07 +0000 LaPed 1855088@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I don't know that I have much to add, but this thread is a treasure-trove! I'm going to come back and read it more carefully later. I will add that I've always experienced the effects of a certain sartorial stodginess; I always attribute it to growing up in New England with its Puritan roots, but who knows. Ex: I wore a lot of purple up 'til I hit 30, and over the past year any purple that isn't almost-black just doesn't feel right anymore. I shy from animal prints. Or really most prints that aren't stripes or plaid (but plaid is just stripes in both directions!). I had a thing for printed leggings, but that has passed -- I can't make them work any more, so the remaining pairs are for loungewear only. I can't chalk these preferences up to any one cause -- age, or body issues, or class pressures, or what have you. I feel more confident than I ever have. It's really just ingrained stodginess.    The only solution I can offer up is finding minimal-commitment ways of exploring the edges of your style Venn diagram -- the stuff that isn't an obvious "yes" but isn't an emphatic "no". There's a been a lot of talk of "shadow personas" on the forum lately -- maybe you have one you want to indulge/explore/give permission to? (Mine apparently wears fisherman's caps and lace-up boots, like a sooty young lad in a Victorian drama, a la Tiny Tim...).  Christina F. on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855084 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 14:31:18 +0000 Christina F. 1855084@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I empathize a lot with what you're saying here, bit not regarding my wardrobe - regarding my hair and the fact that I've kind of let things like makeup (feeling ambivalent about it these days) and skin care go a bit. Not to mention my fitness routine. In my case, I know what some of the answer is for me, which is to take some effort out of fashion and into these other areas. For you, I think you've had some great advice here, and I don't have much to add except that I've found some wardrobe joy this year in trying things in dressing rooms I didn't think advance I would like. Sometimes I ended up laughing at myself a lot in the dressing room, which was fun! But I also got some stuff I wouldn't have touched a year ago. I agree that you've got this! I think you have an innate sense of style that can get you over this rough patch. RobinF on "My wardrobe, and therefore my style, is boring. What to do?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/my-wardrobe-and-therefore-my-style-is-boring-what-to-do/page/2#post-1855078 Mon, 23 Oct 2017 14:01:44 +0000 RobinF 1855078@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I love this thread, it covers so much that most of us deal with. I also fight with my body, my style, what I am projecting about myself. You have really gotten some great advice here. I will be re-reading it for myself. I don't have a lot to add but I will echo everyone else and say that I love your style and I don't think it would take much to tweak it to where you love it too. I agree that it could very well be seasonal, these in-between periods are really hard.