https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Thu, 16 Apr 2026 09:12:14 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk/page/2#post-868347 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 23:32:44 +0000 4babiesMe 868347@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This is a very interesting post for me! I enjoy reading the responses. I'm just barely into my transition from frump to fab (what, 2 weeks maybe?), and I often wonder how people around me will perceive the change. I'm torn between wanting to blend in with the "normal people" and wanting to be noticed as looking fabulous. Quite the conundrum when you are insecure and feel like dressing more stylish will make you more confident, but wanting to avoid laser eyes from others. LOL Though, I have the feeling the laser eyes will come most often from DH and the other people I love (my sisters), who seem to be "stuck" and unwilling to accept new trends. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk/page/2#post-868313 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 22:47:57 +0000 Thistle 868313@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am on 1. But then, I dressed pretty frumpy before. Okay, REALLY REALLY frumpy before! And having such a hard time having DD, and then finally carrying her to term but being on limited movement, then the C-section and the post partum thing. Yeah, 1 for sure! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-868309 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 22:45:28 +0000 rachylou 868309@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Mm. I don't know how I chart. Have always been beyond people's comfort zones sartorially, but not in a bad way (I hope). I would say my zaniness is entertaining and we all enjoy that. However, I prefer not to have people comment at work (positive or negative); that I take as a bad sign. Work is not my catwalk. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-868081 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 19:01:13 +0000 cciele 868081@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've always dressed a bit differently from the norm and have always gotten comments, pretty much positive. So nothing's really changed in my style journey -- it's all par for the course. I guess that'd be a 0 or 1. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-868077 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 18:49:07 +0000 RandomThoughts (Andrea) 868077@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm a 0 or a 1. I don't get many comments but when I do it's positive feedback about my shoes in particular. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-868041 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 18:22:07 +0000 Astrid 868041@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm somewhere between 0 and 2. I think my style changed slowly (mostly because of my budget) and people who saw me regularly didn't notice a big change. I didn't get many comments, but a few positive and negative ones. Those came mostly from people I hadn't seen for a while. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867890 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 15:49:33 +0000 Adelfa 867890@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jayne, I think you've nailed an aspect of the issue--the transition from invisible to visible can be uncomfortable! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867873 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 15:35:31 +0000 Tina.b 867873@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I can't exactly gauge where I fit in on the scale. But I haven't undergone a significant style evolution. Usually the only people who comment on my clothes are people who have a similar interest in fashion. Great question and I enjoyed reading all the responses! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867869 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 15:32:05 +0000 jayne 867869@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I guess I am a 5. The comments are almost always positive and the few negatives I mark down to differences in taste. I do want to note that I have been 'doing' new outfits for about a year now and in the beginning I did get uncomfortable with the eyes! You see, beng frumpy before no one looked. But when I made an effort I started getting at least a once over from women and a man here and there. So no comment, but it was odd to be visible. Now I am pretty used to it and just enjoy it as I am doing something (right or wrong) that makes me stand out. Better than being invisible! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867855 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 15:21:47 +0000 Tanya 867855@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think I am somewhere between 2 and 3. I am a scientist working in a lab, and being fashionable is generally looked down at, and sometimes it can even hurt ones carrier. I personally love clothes and tend to be an early trend adapter. So I am always trying to balance things, to come up with outfits that are modern and polished and me that still do not raise too many eyebrows. I will purposefully tone everything down on days when I have meetings with superiors.<br /> Outside of the lab though, I am a 4. Funny how things change depending on the environment. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867837 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 15:02:08 +0000 modgrl 867837@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think I'm a 2, but I've done this on purpose. I want to look stylish and trendy but I also use my clothes as a uniform or camouflage to fit in. I want to look good, the best "me" that I can be every day, but in a way that is appropriate to the situation. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867833 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 14:55:07 +0000 Adelfa 867833@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sarah and GG, you've got keepers! That is so sweet! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867778 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 13:49:49 +0000 Sarah A 867778@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Interestingly I have moved recently and have become a 0 -- no one here has known me long enough to ever think I dressed anything but like I do now! LOL. DH really likes the new attention I spend on how I look so I am on the positive scale all around right now. Will be interesting to see as things evolve how that may or may not change... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867688 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 10:59:14 +0000 Greek Goddess 867688@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I vary between a one and a five. People always think I have spent a fortune buying clothes and nothing could be further from the truth. I have eclectic tastes and have learned how to put a good look together out of what I have. Most of the time I go out I get compliments on what I am wearing. My husband gives a compliment often, but he will say if something does not look right. I was in the clothes shop yesterday and he commented on how pleased he was that I was buying clothes that will flatter my small waist this summer. He often tells me he is proud of me and loves to be seen with me. I guess that is the ultimate compliment. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867622 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 06:33:06 +0000 Adelfa 867622@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Diana, that's interesting! Interesting that some types of attention you're fine with, others not, and you can describe which is which. I'll have to think about this!</p> <p>Hmm, if my knitting gets complimented, I'm fine with that! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867618 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 06:23:46 +0000 Diana 867618@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm some combination of 1 and 4, depending on the outfit and setting. Oddly, although I am an introvert, it doesn't discomfit me when people talk about my clothes or my style. But say something about *me* (and more often than not it's a compliment, like "you look pretty today" or "you have a great smile") and I still get really uncomfortable. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867616 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 06:07:37 +0000 Adelfa 867616@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lyn D, happy is good! And so are DHs who can joke about things they don't like! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867615 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 06:05:31 +0000 Lyn D. 867615@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>2 and 4 for me.<br /> D.H. jokes about things he doesn't love- patterned pants or shoes for example.<br /> Overall I am happy, budget be-dammed! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867611 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 05:59:34 +0000 Adelfa 867611@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lyn, that's a funny line. I bet your patients appreciate that your look is lively and fun. Once I was leading a depression group and my clients had a little mutiny about my wardrobe. "You wear so much black! It's SO depressing!" I had to reconsider the effect of my clothing choices! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867608 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 05:56:43 +0000 Adelfa 867608@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Rae, that's funny! (We cross posted.) Is he right, or is he missing the many bf-clad Angelenos? I'm trying to think of my recent visit to Venice, and it was skinnies all the way. I'm wondering if LA people are more reluctant than average to give up body-con trends. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867607 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 05:55:34 +0000 lyn* 867607@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am a 4. People make snarky comments, especially when the rest of them are in scrubs. What I tell them is ... "They can take away my freedom, but they can't take my clothes!" And I either get a laugh or a strange look.</p> <p>Oh well, I like dressing differently </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867606 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 05:53:21 +0000 Adelfa 867606@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Elisabeth, it could be that you're in a different culture from theirs. There are cultures where dressing well tends to be frowned on--I can think of two "opposite" ones: a) some conservative religious circles and b) some progressive circles (think college town with lingering hippie influence). Another key might be that you've always dressed like this--sometimes it's the change that triggers the comments. Very interesting and I'm glad you've never had to suffer from cattiness!</p> <p>Donna, LOL!!! "My church is not stylish. Not even the gay members." Oh, I have to remember that! Sort of twisting my brain trying to picture that church. One of my gay colleagues told me that on a recent trip, he took a separate suitcase just for his footwear! I'm introverted too, and often dislike attention.</p> <p>Brenda, you and hubby seem to have a really great fashion relationship! I thought it was so sweet that he requested strapless!</p> <p>Gingko, what effect does it have when you consider your purchases through the other women's eyes?</p> <p>Echo and Zapotee, that makes sense! It seems like the fabbers who've always dressed aren't really drawing comments!</p> <p>Katie, it's so true that our tolerance for attention might vary with mood!</p> <p>Suz, of course you don't have to pick! You know that! Pick as many as you want, or none of the above. I always appreciate your thoughtful responses. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867600 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 05:43:00 +0000 rae 867600@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Heh, I'm at a 2, which is actually the result of feeling both 1 and 3 in different scenarios. People like the changes here and at work, but DH makes the comments at home. In the end I suppose it averages out. He actually said the other day that he never sees anyone else wearing baggy jeans - and we live in LA LA Land, people! I would be in big trouble if we lived somewhere really conservative. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867597 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 05:37:22 +0000 Aziraphale 867597@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Gee, I don't know. I dress how I like, and sometimes it's mainstream and sometimes it's a bit outré. And since I've always dressed like this, no one really notices. People do comment sometimes, but it's always to say nice things, like "I like your shoes" or "you always look so put-together" (although I can't figure that one out, because lots of times I'm in my hiking gear or I'm just a plain ol' hot mess). And I guess I must like the attention, or I wouldn't bother putting myself together, or bother to buy shoes that are likely to inspire comments.</p> <p>So I guess I'm a zero and a five. :-)</p> <p>I'm always surprised when people write posts about how they get negative or catty comments when they make an effort to dress stylishly. And these sorts of posts do pop up regularly. I've been reading this blog for two years, and I'd say once every couple of months someone writes a post about a coworker or fellow soccer mom's snide comment, in which it's clear the poster was a little hurt or taken aback. I have literally never had that happen -- so either people are less rude where I live, or else I'm just oblivious. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867567 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 04:48:54 +0000 DonnaF 867567@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I would say a LOT of #1; many, many people have commented along of lines of "Boy, you've upped your style quotient since your daughter left for college." This is from my women's group where half of us -- basically, those who commented -- have been meeting for over 18 years, and from my church, an overlapping group BTW. My church is not stylish. Not even the gay members. But footwear IS required. And perfume discouraged thank goodness due to environmental sensitivities.</p> <p>I'm basically an introvert so attention embarrasses me, but not enough to return to frumpdom. And since I feel that my bright blue suede booties are a bit loud for work, I've worn them to church. And now 19 year old DD lusts after a few items of my clothing, including those blue suede booties, and in the past she was never interested in anything I wore. I just have to be careful that I don't wander into MDAL territory. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867564 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 04:48:00 +0000 qfbrenda 867564@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I do get comments though they are mostly positive. Hubby is generally thrilled with how I dress though isn't afraid to tell me when he doesn't like a particular look or item. I try to please him most of the time and occasionally let him know he needs to adjust his eyes. :)</p> <p>I guess I'm a 4. I'm not too worried about what the "normal" folk think since they are usually way under dressed in my estimation. I'm going to do what I'm going to do and they can think what they want to think. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867550 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 04:35:33 +0000 Ginkgo 867550@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm about a 2, the comments have been favorable but I'm a bit self-conscious about them. My husband teases me but does like the occasion when I look "right", and a friend who used to dress up for work (and still works) has sloughed off and has not always been positive. The normal folk that I know seem to include a number of women "of a certain age" (like me) who have sort of quit dressing well. Lately I've found myself considering new purchases through their eyes. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867539 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 04:25:09 +0000 Echo 867539@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Given that many people around here wear workout gear or yoga pants most of the time, I have always "dressed up" in their eyes. So no one has noticed anything different with me because I am just trying to change proportions and tweak things to make them more flattering instead of changing my style completely. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867508 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 03:51:24 +0000 Katiepea 867508@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hmmmm, this is really interesting.</p> <p>For me personally, I find I oscillate anywhere between a 3 and a 5. </p> <p>This range is because I believe a lot of it comes down to my mood on any given day ('tood matters, I've found!). I think it also depends how "out there" the new look is in comparison to previous style choices I've made. If it is a kind of variation on a theme that I know works for me, I'm less likely to care what anyone else thinks. </p> <p>Thanks for the food for thought! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/looking-okay-for-the-normal-folk#post-867501 Tue, 05 Mar 2013 03:46:40 +0000 Suz 867501@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Adelfa, you are fast becoming our Queen Pollster!! </p> <p>And you raise great questions. </p> <p>Once again, I want to say: No no! Can't pick one!! It's too complicated. It's not either/ or, it is both/and! </p> <p>The only people to have made critical comments since I've joined YLF have been my husband and daughter. I have received compliments from others only (though who knows what some might privately have been thinking). And although hubs and/ or daughter often let me know they think I'm off my rocker, just as often they let me know I've done well. So it sort of balances out. </p> <p>As for me, my attitude is #4. Sure, my confidence can take a beating some days, but mostly I figure I"m moving in the right direction. </p>