https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Fri, 01 May 2026 05:24:05 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329997 Wed, 13 Aug 2014 16:04:22 +0000 Marlene 1329997@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wow! &nbsp;So many ways to look at this issue. &nbsp;From totally practical to completely cerebral! &nbsp;And actually, in my case, I need to go cerebral. &nbsp;Now that I have seen so many ideas, the ones that are resonating with me are the ones that are telling me to explore the idea of "me". &nbsp;</p> <p>Last night I started doing my fall closet edit and made the decision to let go off all the more classic shaped jackets and blazers. &nbsp;I have them because I am "supposed" to but I never wear them. &nbsp;Ever. &nbsp;I always reach for the quirky toppers. &nbsp;I like things that different and unconventional. &nbsp;So I should just accept this about myself and work it. &nbsp;I think its a pretty decent first step in this process. But the journey continues. &nbsp;I hope that this is what I need to do to figure out "me". &nbsp;Well, the "me" that needs to get dressed. &nbsp;I want the outside me to match the inside me. &nbsp;Then I will hopefully be able to negotiate the shopping thing better/easier. &nbsp;So yes, it would be EASIER if the fashion styles of today were more specific but that is not the reality. &nbsp;I just need to develop the tools to fend for myself!</p> <p>So thank you everyone that has piped in so far. &nbsp;Its been so enlightening and thought provoking. &nbsp;This really is a great community!</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329809 Wed, 13 Aug 2014 11:08:45 +0000 crutcher 1329809@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I hear your concerns...A few suggestions...what do you reach for and would wear every day if you allowed your sweet self to do so?...Troll the online shopping offers..Nordstrom, Gap, etc...what hops out at you and you smile when you see it?...Go to Pinterest and troll styles..this always gets me as I can find a ton of Me's...<br />Your style is not hidden..it is just hanging around for you to find...Good luck...<br />(What about reading Ines de la Fressange's book Parisian Chic...that gave me some great suggestions...Also if you like Ines, google her and you will find a ton of pictures...always an inspiration for me...good luck...) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329793 Wed, 13 Aug 2014 09:09:00 +0000 fuzzylogic 1329793@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi Marlene! &nbsp;I completely understand! I think the key to knowing which trends to try and how to incorporate them&nbsp;is knowing yourself! And sometimes this involves experimentation..... &nbsp;so be brave and have fun! &nbsp;It's only fashion.......!!!!! Which pieces/outifts do you feel most comfortable in? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329787 Wed, 13 Aug 2014 07:07:06 +0000 T 1329787@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Choice can be overwhelming. Which is why I suspect some people adopt a sort of uniform when it comes to clothes. <br />I think people here have given good advice when suggesting you to&nbsp;introspect. Maybe you could identify few idols&nbsp;who you admire for being stylish, and initially just try to imitate their clothing choices in your own colors &amp; budget. Or even a pin-board where you collect images of styles that appeal to you. If this is something that you haven't thought about consciously earlier, it may be a bit hard at first. </p> <p>I think once you start to know what you want to wear, you may start even appreciating the wide variety that is out there.&nbsp;</p> <p>I am so glad I no longer have to wait for plaid, polka dots, gingham, stripes &amp; other&nbsp;patterns to be in vouge before indulging my preppy side! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329613 Wed, 13 Aug 2014 00:59:16 +0000 Style Fan 1329613@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I find shopping much harder now that I am retired.&nbsp; When I worked it was easier.&nbsp; I have been working on the Starting from Scratch Wardrobe from the Vivienne Files, into mind and unfancy blogs.&nbsp; Getting dressed is much more challenging.&nbsp; The style is not the issue for me but what to wear for the activities I do.&nbsp; Dog walking, yoga, cooking,......&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329594 Wed, 13 Aug 2014 00:44:51 +0000 Angie 1329594@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Marlene, perhaps&nbsp;the fact that you no longer work full time is making it&nbsp;harder to choose amidst the overwhelming variety of casual pieces. Throw in your environmental norm, and it just became more complicated.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329561 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 23:44:24 +0000 Gigi 1329561@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Marlene, I agree that too much choice is stressful. Sometimes I long for my tiny pre-YLF wardrobe where I just picked a colored bottom and one of my white tops and got dressed for the day. And it can be so easy to go into a store and find that the skirt you want comes in only one color, so that's what you buy, as opposed to going online and getting&nbsp;to choose between ten different colors, which is perplexing. At least that's what happens to me&nbsp;:(</p> <p>I wonder if one of the reasons you're also having a problem is maybe you yourself are changing? I found that as I tried new types of clothing, I didn't know what the "real me" was anymore. I was changing based on the clothing. I think that dressing in different types of styles is very powerful for developing our sense of identity.</p> <p>Can you think back over the last few years and pinpoint any outfits that you really enjoyed? I wonder if that would help you see some patterns.</p> <p>One thing I did for my upcoming fall shopping was create a mood board. It was a lot of work, but the results were eye-opening for me.<br /><a rel="nofollow" href="http://into-mind.com/2014/02/28/mood-boards-2-0/">http://into-mind.com/2014/02/28/mood-boards-2-0/</a></p> <p>What I liked about this mood board idea was that the gal who created it divides it up into different categories: single color, color combos, materials/textures, etc. So you can really get a clear look at all the different components of clothing that you might be attracted to. And it can really help you narrow down what you want to buy *now*.</p> <p>She recommends using both print and electronic sources, but lazy old me just used electronic stuff. You can use Pinterest, or if you're like me and hate Pinterest, you can use your computer's photo program. I have a Mac and used iPhoto—I just dragged the images I liked into iPhoto to import them, and then I put them in albums according to the categories she lists in the instructions.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329460 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 21:31:47 +0000 rachylou 1329460@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, I'm with Claire on the actual practice of shopping. I can't, for example, just go into a Macy's. Way way too much... <i>stuff</i> just crammed onto racks. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329451 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 21:15:25 +0000 Anonymous 1329451@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Marlene, that makes perfect sense. I don't do well in large department stores at all. The only way I can shop there is if I've pre-shopped online and I'm going in to try on something specific.&nbsp;</p> <p>You might have to create some parameters that voluntarily give up some of your choices. I've done this so much that I'm considering removing a few of them or else I'll never find anything that works, lol! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329383 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 19:23:54 +0000 Suz 1329383@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ah!&nbsp;</p> <p>I used to get this when I went shopping. I hadn't shopped for many years and rarely bought myself clothes before YLF. Then I got back into it, but it took a while -- I felt overstimulated and jangled by all the choice.&nbsp;</p> <p>One strategy that helped me was to narrow it down to a few key items that I really needed. Good jeans, a winter coat, boots. This focussed my shopping and allowed me to concentrate on details of fit and style.&nbsp;</p> <p>Some people find boutiques easier than department stores. Or even chain stores -- once you find a brand that has a fit that generally works for you, you can concentrate your shopping energy there.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329379 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 19:16:04 +0000 Marlene 1329379@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oooh that book looks great! I must read that! &nbsp;</p> <p>I think my situation is sort of like grocery shopping. &nbsp;I hate it because I get overwhelmed by the choice. And ENTIRE aisle of soft drinks? &nbsp;30 kinds of ketchup? &nbsp;My brain just shuts down. But I LIKE going to Trader Joes. &nbsp;I find it so much easier when I only have to make a choice between 2....</p> <p>&nbsp;&nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329347 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 18:37:51 +0000 Anonymous 1329347@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I get that overwhelmed feeling when shopping too! There are so many choices, and I feel like each one will take me down a different style path. How do I know which one to choose?&nbsp;<b>Sterling</b> and others have given some great advice on how to articulate your style and narrow those choices down.&nbsp;</p> <p>Here's an interesting read called The Paradox Of Choice:<br /><a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Paradox-Choice-More-Less/dp/0060005696/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1407868540&amp;sr=8-1&amp;keywords=barry+schwartz">http://www.amazon.com/The-Para.....540&#038;s</a></p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329340 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 18:25:55 +0000 texstyle 1329340@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What do you reach for when you want to feel "good" in your clothes? Like you're going out to dinner with good friends and you want to look and feel relaxed and at your best. A certain color? Fabric? Pattern? Dress? Jeans? That's a good first step to me. Next, what you reached for, what style does the item or items have? Classic? Boho? Feminine?</p> <p>That's what I do at least. Not a lot of magic to it I suppose. I have preconceived notions of how I want to look I guess. But other than wanting to look clean, well groomed, pretty, feminine and ready for the activity I'm dressed for (but not girly, not glamourous, not androgynous, etc. for me), it makes it pretty clear to me that I'm a classic natural kind of person and gravitate towards that style. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329329 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 18:10:28 +0000 rachylou 1329329@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh I think you're right, Marlene. In decades past, there was The Look of The Moment and either you were on board or not. Ok, and maybe one counter-cultural style for the total misfits. The Look came in expensive and it came in cheap, and that was about that.</p> <p>Now there's a smorgasbord of styles, and many of them are "upcycled" styles. You don't have high / low versions of the same look. You have high and low pieces in an outfit. It's all about this myriad that results from everybody&nbsp; single-mindedly doing their own thing.</p> <p>I figure the first thing a girl has to figure out is what's that thing she's doing... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329245 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 16:40:50 +0000 Marlene 1329245@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Suz - now that I am writing it all out, that may be the root of the problem. &nbsp;What was "me" in the past? &nbsp;I need to really focus on that part of this process now that I am looking at what to buy for the fall. &nbsp;</p> <p>What is frustrating is that it was never this hard in the past. I found stuff I liked and wore it. &nbsp;Why the heck is it so puzzling NOW?&nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329239 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 16:35:58 +0000 Anonymous 1329239@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>There are some wonderful workbooks available on the internet for free that walk you through the steps to developing a personal style. &nbsp;I can't get you any links right now, but I will try to post some this evening.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />Another option is to use pinterest and pin everything that interests you. &nbsp;After you have an assortment of pins, go through them and break them down into the qualities/components that speak to you. &nbsp;Those are the things you might focus your search on. &nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329196 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 15:59:50 +0000 Suz 1329196@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Interesting. Can you identify what made them say that? Any patterns? Was it colours, or cut, or combinations, or what?&nbsp;</p> <p>I echo Aziriphale's question. What made you feel "you" in the past? Could you translate that into something that is current?&nbsp;</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329182 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 15:39:02 +0000 Aziraphale 1329182@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Marlene, what Suz says is right on the money. The trick is to identify certain key trends that make your look feel current.&nbsp;Like her, I'm loving all this choice. We are, in some ways, spoiled for choice in this decade. I see why you could get overwhelmed, though. If you feel current but don't know if you feel like "yourself", would it help to look back? What elements of your style made you feel like yourself in past decades?</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329173 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 15:26:45 +0000 Marlene 1329173@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've always felt like I had a personal style in the past. &nbsp;People would see something and say "that's so Marlene". &nbsp;I don't know what those things are now. &nbsp;I feel like what i wear is current...I'm just not sure if its "me" or not. &nbsp;There are just so many options when I am out shopping that i get overwhelmed. &nbsp;So yes...options are good. &nbsp;But the options just seem so random and broad that I am having a hard time honing in. &nbsp;So I struggle. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329143 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 14:47:12 +0000 Suz 1329143@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Did you have a defined personal style in the past, Marlene?&nbsp;</p> <p>Speaking for myself, I love the options available. It means there is something to suit almost anybody.&nbsp;</p> <p>Did you read Angie's blog post about what defines 2014 style? <a rel="nofollow" href="http://youlookfab.com/2014/03/11/the-look-of-2014/">This might help.</a>&nbsp;</p> <p>It's true there are many options -- but certain key trends do identify a very current look vs. one that is less current.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/i-figured-out-why-i-have-a-problem-with-todays-styles#post-1329135 Tue, 12 Aug 2014 14:39:23 +0000 Marlene 1329135@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I was glancing through Angie's 80"s post just a moment ago and had a light bulb moment! &nbsp;The past couple years I've been having such a hard time figuring out my personal style and dabbling in various trends and such, trying to establish what is "me". &nbsp;Well, in decades past, there was a definite recipe for what to wear. &nbsp;Now...there is none. &nbsp;There is so much of everything available that you are permitted to wear whatever you want. &nbsp;PLUS...so much of today's styles seem to be taken from the past, &nbsp;There doesn't seem to be a particular look that say 2014. It's like this year we are doing a 2014 version of 80's trends, for example.&nbsp;So on one hand, we can do whatever we please as individuals...on the other hand ITS SO HARD! &nbsp;Is anyone else struggling with trying to establish personal style with so many options available? </p>