https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 18 Apr 2026 20:19:56 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2023084 Mon, 29 Apr 2019 08:47:45 +0000 Sally B 2023084@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Mmmm ... I'm a fusspot so if it's visible in any way, it's binned. Having said that, often my cheap items last longer than more expensive purchases! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2023063 Mon, 29 Apr 2019 04:02:48 +0000 Jessikams 2023063@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Love it, DonnaF </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022665 Sat, 27 Apr 2019 01:36:38 +0000 DonnaF 2022665@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Call it "Western old money shabbily genteel." Since you're not Chinese, maybe you can get away with it? Maybe get a new bag with the new coat? Or a bigger one to REALLY cover the rubbed patch? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022504 Fri, 26 Apr 2019 10:04:19 +0000 Sal 2022504@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lyn- your words are true for me also!!!</p> <p>I do distinguish wear from stains- and some signs of wear from worn out. </p> <p>I am not terribly observant so often do not notice. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022495 Fri, 26 Apr 2019 08:47:57 +0000 lyn67 2022495@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think it's all about different cultures, personalities and environments you live in- and big surprise also about how good your vision is!( not kidding!:-)). <br />I myself am annoyed by (and cannot wear too much/many) signs of wear (not only for work, but casual, too)-but I take care about my clothes and petting&nbsp; them for years.<br />Interesting point about jewelry (from Brooklyn) I never liked too shiny (maybe only for a cuff?) and pristine either and I would happily wear&nbsp; an authentic piece which shows a good amount of wear (like Coco:-)) but the truth is I&nbsp; cannot afford&nbsp; one&nbsp; so I have to please myself with fake antique finishes-but they don't last unfortunately...:-(&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022478 Fri, 26 Apr 2019 06:10:09 +0000 anchie 2022478@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>For me shoes are the most difficult category to define when it is too much. I walk a lot and destroy my shoes on regular basis but I can’t replace them after each scratch. There’s a point when they become just too beaten which I don’t always notice or I don’t have adequate replacement and have to keep wearing them. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022465 Fri, 26 Apr 2019 04:37:21 +0000 Jessikams 2022465@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wearing happily for now. We’ll see how I feel when fall runs around! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022249 Thu, 25 Apr 2019 12:43:22 +0000 Liesbeth 2022249@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm with laPed and would probably retire when they:<br />a) start to look bad beyond the parts covered by your bag<br />b) look like they will tear at any moment</p> <p>Yet all other considerations are equally valid </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022244 Thu, 25 Apr 2019 12:35:36 +0000 Brooklyn 2022244@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I must fall into Angie’s “urban grit” camp as I’m comfortable with fair wear and tear. As long as the item still fits and is clean and pressed (no stains, unintentional rips, pet hair or obvious loss of shape). My face is lived in and my body is lived in. I’d rather not look like everything I am wearing on it is brand new and in pristine condition. That’s part of the reason why I like vintage jewellery - the fact that it has a history and wasn’t made yesterday. Much like me! But that’s just my style preference of course.</p> <p>I was reading recently about the iconic Byzantine style cuffs developed by the Duke of Verdura for Coco Chanel. She adored them and wore them everywhere. Apparently the ones from her personal collection are all chipped from wear. I like the fact that, for all her wealth and the fresher alternatives that must have been available to her, she saw the enduring beauty in them and remained faithful to them, despite the obvious signs of wear.</p> <p>So, if you still love the coats, wear them with pride </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022218 Thu, 25 Apr 2019 11:09:12 +0000 LaPed 2022218@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think there's definitely a cultural element to this. I'm in New England where there's a lot of perceived virtue in the old adage "Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without." And there's also an element of "old money" here so people wearing all shiny new things, driving new cars, etc are looked at by some as "nouveau riche" (very different from Beijing, I suspect!). </p> <p>I have a hard time being bothered by visible wear on most things. I probably wouldn't wear that coat to a job interview or important meeting, but for everyday wear I would live with it until I found a great replacement. I would also remind myself that most of the time, the bag itself will be covering the wear, and when I take off the bag, I'm probably taking off the coat as well, so how much will people really notice it? </p> <p>Like Jenni NZ, my frugal side would be bothered by coats that wore out quickly, especially the pricier one. So when shopping for a replacement, I would be looking for a solution to the problem, maybe a smooth, durable fabric that could tolerate a lot of abrasion. A trench coat with a warm lining, perhaps?  </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022216 Thu, 25 Apr 2019 10:14:24 +0000 Jenni NZ 2022216@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Goodness Joy some of you ladies are pretty tough in this thread! You and Janet and lisap! Surely Jessikams, who is a snazzy and interesting dresser, is still going to look OK in these coats for a while longer if she wants to wait a while and get more out of them especially the more expensive one.<br /> I don’t think her eyesight will seem to be going </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage/page/2#post-2022179 Thu, 25 Apr 2019 04:02:35 +0000 Anonymous 2022179@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Time to go shopping. It’s like not seeing food stains on your clothes. People may wonder if your eyesight is going. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2022089 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 21:48:47 +0000 Jenni NZ 2022089@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I get furious if I think it is too soon with what I think of as a quality brand. And that’s where being the forum’s resident tightwad helps, if I have got it at an outlet store, on sale, designer garage sale at Fashion Week, or whatever. You’re saying it’s kind of fair enough because of all the walking in those coats? I would still feel cross about the Club Monaco one more than the H&amp;M one. I might still ditch them if you can see it at conversation distance because I don’t feel as good with much visible wear. I can cope with some. I’m with Sal I think, may be our shared Kiwi culture, there does come a point...And since you’re in Beijing it may be best to follow your surrounding culture.<br /> But I totally understand your thrifty side feeling whiny. My thrifty side is most of me with a very small side of “seize the day” which mostly appears with shoes! So I would be buying a cheap one next time but maybe updating the bag as Bijou suggests so it doesn’t happen- or if buying a more expensive coat then *definitely* updating the bag.<br /> My husband is also more willing to wear worn stuff than me. He uses his father’s saying ( his father now 88 years old) of “It’s all right”. I don’t always agree! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2022085 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 21:31:34 +0000 Anonymous 2022085@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This whole conversation is making me very anxious I notice EVERYTHING and just can’t with worn out clothes that are not meant to be that way . I want to take that person aside and ask if they require assistance , or an intervention - lol. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2022082 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 21:25:02 +0000 Jane 2022082@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I find very heavily worn items difficult to wear. I might consign from work to home wardrobe, but eventually, they just don't get picked out from my wardrobe. For me, it is particulary bags that start to look worn. as I am very heavy with them - or so it seems to me! I am quite surprised that H&amp;M wears the same as the CM trench. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2022053 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 19:52:59 +0000 The Cat 2022053@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What Janet and lisa p said. (So, you see, it's not just them. ) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021897 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 13:42:43 +0000 Astrid 2021897@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p> <div>To me items truly wearing out is a good thing, because it usually shows me that I got my money's worth out of them. Most of the clothing which gets thrown away isn't near the point of wearing out... I'm usually fine with a bit of wear, in fact I'm not a pristine dresser at all. But there's a point where I just have to let go. I guess when that point is depends on you as a person and your environment...<br /></div><div><br /></div><div>I'm all for shopping responsibly and buying only what you need, but I never wear worn out or damaged clothes. I either try to fix them (in case of torn seams, lost buttons and so on) or I let them go. So I say buy a new coat! <br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Just yesterday I realised that I've worn my favourite denim jacket through at the elbows. There's already a hole on one side and the other isn't far away. I've been wearing it for at least five years, so I'm happy with the wear I got out of it. It was a wardrobe workhorse in summer, so I'm going to shop for a direct replacement.<br /></div></p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021896 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 13:40:34 +0000 Angie 2021896@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I've lived in Asia and in Europe. You are dead right in my experience, <b>Jessikams.</b></p> <p>In London, Amsterdam and Paris - a worn trench is no problem. Part of urban grit. Chanel bags are quite beaten up!&nbsp;</p> <p>In Hong Kong and Japan - it's seen as more problematic. Very pristine and polished styles everywhere. Chanel bags are immaculate.&nbsp; &nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021895 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 13:35:52 +0000 Sal 2021895@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Mmmm it depends. Mostly on what the item is, where I wear it, how much I like it. I am okay with wear on many things - but there does come a point...... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021858 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 10:37:12 +0000 Anonymous 2021858@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It depends on how much I love or need the item! If it's not a workhorse and I don't love it, I'll pass things on with a small amount of wear. But if it's a wardrobe essential or something I really love, and can't afford to replace it (or can't find something I like as much) it stays long past it's prime. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021853 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 10:16:31 +0000 Jessikams 2021853@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My photo attempts have failed utterly- just a dark blur when I get close up- but that’s ok, as I was really just more interested to hear the variety of perspectives. I love all your unique voices— RunCarla’s impossibility of “unseeing,” Shevia’s desire to just leave the house!, Gretchen’s husband as the Hulk.... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021797 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 07:40:19 +0000 Stagiaire Fash 2021797@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>"IDGAF" is the new RATE </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021796 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 07:32:59 +0000 Gigi 2021796@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I personally don't feel very good wearing things that are showing wear. To me, if the wear is obvious at conversation distance, then it is time to start looking for a replacement piece. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021744 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 01:32:33 +0000 Echo 2021744@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I look at things very much like Janet. There are some items that are better with wear, but as for crisper items, signs of wear ruin the look for me. I have a pair of five buckle boots that get better every year, but most other clothing is a loss for me once it shows clear signs of wear.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021743 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 01:29:43 +0000 Kathie 2021743@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>For work clothes, I prefer for items to be reasonably crisp, and not pilled, thinning, or faded. I do try to learn from what's happened. For example, after wearing through the elbows on two cashmere sweaters, I realized that I was leaning on my elbows a lot. In your case, I'd likely buy a new trench next fall, and figure out a different bag, or a different way to wear it. For weekend clothes, I'm far less picky, since my weekends are spent watching kids' sports. I'm starting to think about my commuting shoes- although I shed those at work, I run into a lot of people on my way into the office, so I'm thinking I might want to start applying closer to my work standards for those. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021741 Wed, 24 Apr 2019 01:11:14 +0000 Jaime 2021741@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Pilling is my bugaboo but I am sure I wear tired looking bags frequently. I am not into that everything is squeaky clean and new look for myself (as I would never be able to leave the house). Need pictures to assess the case at hand. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021633 Tue, 23 Apr 2019 17:32:14 +0000 Gretchen 2021633@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>For me, if it's noticeable at conversation distance, it's time to repair or retire. It's more that I wouldn't feel comfortable in it.&nbsp;</p> <p>Jessikams I think our husbands share the same approach. Mine just had a button down fray to the point that the fabric split. We had a good laugh about his "incredible hulk moment" and he finally retired the unwearable shirt!&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021604 Tue, 23 Apr 2019 16:15:02 +0000 Carla 2021604@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I was thinking along the lines of nemos'smom re: patches. Maybe a leather patch over one shoulder, like on a rifleman' sweater? But, only if you really love it. It will allow for continued use of the bag that caused the wear, too.</p> <p>I get so disappointed when an item causes damage, or clothing doesn't hold up. DS had a spendy winter jacket that pilled horribly from his messenger bag. Soooo disappointing. A pair of cool stylish trousers pilled on the hip where by cross body rubbed, and I couldn't unsee the damage. Pilling has really put me off synthetics. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021594 Tue, 23 Apr 2019 15:27:32 +0000 taylor 2021594@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sounds like these items are well loved and well worn . Probably time to replace for something new and pristine.:) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/how-much-is-too-muchdamage#post-2021568 Tue, 23 Apr 2019 13:53:11 +0000 Jessikams 2021568@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>LisaP, I feel similarly. Though my thrifty side is very whiny about it.</p> <p>Very interested to hear others’ thought processes though. My hubs, for example, wears stuff to work even when it is frayed or lightly marked (pen ink etc). He says “it’s still a button-down, it’s good enough.” I feel that sharper is better, especially at work. Maybe I feel especially that way in Beijing, where new/clean clothing is very much “the done thing”, perhaps because of recent growth and prosperity. In the US I tend to see worn clothes as tough or authentic, but that doesn’t seem to fly in Beijing in the same way. </p>