https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sun, 19 Apr 2026 06:39:14 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/7#post-1334394 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 21:30:58 +0000 Angie 1334394@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you IK for wrapping up this thread on such&nbsp;a positive and fabulous note. Reaching consensus is indeed a great way to close this thread.&nbsp;</p> <p>Of course, if anyone wants to discuss the topic in future, feel free to open another thread.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/7#post-1334270 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 17:42:46 +0000 cheryle (Dianthus) 1334270@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>If only the democratic process employed by governments were as efficient and effective as YLF. &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/7#post-1334222 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 16:34:11 +0000 Mo 1334222@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>;) &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/7#post-1334219 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 16:31:47 +0000 ironkurtin 1334219@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Emily - Agree!&nbsp; Personal criticisms are not helpful.</p> <p>Not to be cold but I think we're at a point of consensus.&nbsp; Ask for a critique (say, with STYLE LAB in your header) and you'll get it.&nbsp; YLF stays true to a goal of being open and supportive, and if you want to cheer, or get one yourself, go for it.</p> <p>I suggest we close this thread now? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1334211 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 16:23:56 +0000 Neel 1334211@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Honestly, I have come a very long way in my style journey using Angie and this YLF community. And if that is due to the cheer leading ... So be it! </p> <p>I have got plenty of advice when I have asked for it. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1334203 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 16:18:51 +0000 Emily 1334203@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Maybe one of the other 100+ replies to this post has mentioned this, and I missed it? :)</p> <p><a rel="nofollow" href="http://youlookfab.com/2014/02/11/judge-the-outfit-not-the-person/">http://youlookfab.com/2014/02/.....he-person/</a></p> <p>On reading through it sounds like the critiques that were found to be hurtful or have stuck with members were phrased more like criticisms of a person than an outfit.</p> <p>I love that in addition to being stylish&nbsp;this is a tactful, polite, kind, grown-up space. &nbsp;Does anyone else remember the livejournal hot_fashion back in the early 00s? &nbsp;Yeugh.</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1334195 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 16:09:03 +0000 ironkurtin 1334195@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>MsMary, you are so right. One thing I've always loved about YLF is that assuming good intentions comes with the site.&nbsp; It's a great mantra in general. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1334182 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 15:56:56 +0000 MsMary 1334182@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am absolutely Team Be the Change You Want to See.&nbsp; I really do think there's room for cheerleading, gushing, Outfit Labbing, and all of it right here as long as we're clear abut what kind of feedback we want, and reasonably sensitive in the kind of feedback we give.&nbsp; One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was "assume good intentions," and I think a little of that would go a long way in this context, on all sides of the WIW's. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1334158 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 15:21:50 +0000 ironkurtin 1334158@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jorja, why is that?&nbsp; Please explain. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1334144 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 15:04:10 +0000 Jorja 1334144@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am a regular lurker who is always debating whether I should post a comment or maybe even a WIW. I have read enough of this post to know I won't be doing either. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1334032 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 13:20:45 +0000 pil 1334032@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I *try* to remember to ask for suggestions for improvements in my threads. My experiences with forum feedback have been genuinely helpful and encouraging and greatly appreciated. Spanning (am I using this correctly?) opinions are not unwelcome on my threads, they are all part of the give and take and can be educational.<br /> Unfrumped's comment resonates with me though.<br /> "Otherwise you risk the clique effect of, we' re the real thing, the crest of you are fluff."<br /> As someone who doesn't have an innate, or even acquired, 'style eye' and is more of a cheerleader, I find myself hesitating to comment lately. My comments aren't analytical or critical in nature but, superficial as they may be, are simply a genuine appreciation for the poster's outfit and and my way of being an active forum participant. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333989 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 12:12:35 +0000 unfrumped 1333989@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think it is better for each poster to just say the type of feedback desired. That is more likely to happen as one is or gets more comfortable with outfit anayseis. Otherwise you risk the clique effect of, we' re the real thing, the crest of you are fluff. </p> <p>There is always a tendency to tutu to cm change itherdcrsthervthan change ourselves. I have that, big time. As in, if I think I have a great idea, I start thinking of why " we all" should start doing that-- it helps legitimize it and make me feel less alone. </p> <p>So I can see why it is attractive to have a category that announces " serious critique" but I think in the long run it is better to lead by example and not by creating a category. </p> <p>I also get back to, it's most important for me to GET critique and less important to feel unfettered in giving it. I don't mean that as self- centered--I<br /> mean it again as, heal thyself, don't fret about "fixing" other people. </p> <p>That approach may be what provides the checks and balances on how much analysis a poster really wants. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333955 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 10:11:12 +0000 gryffin 1333955@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>crutcher - what beautiful words!!&nbsp; Amen to that!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333954 Mon, 18 Aug 2014 10:08:27 +0000 crutcher 1333954@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>If its not broken, don't fix it...I appreciate having this dialogue but somehow I fear this is going to cause us to loose the special place that is YLF...I have just loved this positive, interesting place (YLF) where I can come and just let the day's troubles go away for a while I play clothes...I appreciate Angie's positive personality where you know you are safe and loved...Maybe what I am looking for is a simplistic solution...<br />I keep coming back in my mind to Dr. Maya Angelou's words:<br />&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;People will forget what you said,&nbsp;<br />&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;People will forget what you did<br />&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;but people will never forget how you made them feel...</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333720 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 23:59:19 +0000 Angie 1333720@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This sounds too complicated, and I am not keen on adding more categories to this forum.&nbsp;I stand behind what Mary said. If you want a very detailed critique of your outfit - all you have to do is ask for one in your forum&nbsp;post.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333626 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:36:22 +0000 catgirl 1333626@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>&nbsp;I think just using the term "Outfit Lab" in a title could be shorthand for "break it down, Fabbers" - in other words, I want constructive critique and I can take it.<br /> A separate section would be great too.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333625 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:35:41 +0000 Suz 1333625@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>That's what I was thinking, Dana. A separate category like shopping, dressing, etc. We could discuss with Greg and Angie to see if they like the idea. I do see AmyK's point -- if this is your biggest draw then it can be hard to find the posts that are doing it when you're in a hurry.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333624 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:34:47 +0000 columbine(erin) 1333624@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I like the term Outfit Lab, from Alasse, too. Seems like it could be a helpful term to use in the title of posts, to help direct what kind of feedback you need on your WIW. WIW-outfit lab edition. Hmm. There is so much food for thought in this thread.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333621 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:33:17 +0000 ironkurtin 1333621@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You mean, like shopping and dressing, another section called Lab or similar? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333620 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:32:03 +0000 minimalist 1333620@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Alassë, in the little time I have for the forum, I'd like to be able to quickly find those threads in which the member is seeking detailed critique (and perhaps unfiltered initial overall impression). If those threads were merely titled differently, they might be a challenge to find.An "Outfit Lab" (love that!) tag would simplify so much. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333619 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:30:18 +0000 Suz 1333619@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hmm. The title "Outfit Lab" IS really cool and could identify the need very clearly. Neat.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333617 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:29:34 +0000 Suz 1333617@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Fascinating. I fall into MsMary's camp in the sense that I think all we have to do is ask if what we want is analysis specifically. Maybe in something other than a WIW post. Again -- K/R or "this sweater or that" type posts tend to yield the most analysis, along with, "I like these proportions (or colours, or silhouette) for me, do you? Why or why not?" and similar.&nbsp;</p> <p>Basically, WIW is something that already happened. So analyzing it too much without specific requests to do so, (e.g. "I felt meh in this outfit all day, can you help me see why?") can feel a bit silly.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333616 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:28:14 +0000 catgirl 1333616@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>We could also have those little&nbsp;"signature"&nbsp;footers at the bottom of all our posts that say what type of feedback we want.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333613 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:24:25 +0000 Lyn D. 1333613@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I like the term&nbsp;<b>'Outfit Lab'&nbsp;</b>from Alasse- food for thought! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333612 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:23:56 +0000 minimalist 1333612@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Like Gaylene, I would likely post WIWs again if there were a section for dry and unemotional outfit analysis. Previous attempts at posting WIWs yielded certainly well-intended encouragement, and helpful insights from several members whose opinions I appreciate. On balance though, it came up shorter on concrete feedback and objective impression-sharing than I'd need to feel posting WIWs is worth the privacy compromise. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333607 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:16:34 +0000 ironkurtin 1333607@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It's clear that many people do feel the way they dress is very personal, not just in terms of personal style but in terms of personal reflection on themselves.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333604 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:14:43 +0000 Alassë 1333604@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Interesting idea to have a separate sub-section for heavy-duty analysis. Or, perhaps a member could title her WIW thread in such a way that announces her desire to have an outfit lab discussion. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333597 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 21:02:45 +0000 MsMary 1333597@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It's so funny, because I experience the existing YLF as "a place where outfits can be analyzed and critiqued in a helpful way."&nbsp; I've seen it happen here over and over again.&nbsp; I really do feel like if you want detailed critiques, all you have to do is ask for them.&nbsp; </p> <p>As for making it impersonal, I feel like that would be hard because how we choose to dress ourselves is inherently very very personal. So even comments about "just the clothes" can hit close to home.</p> <p>ETA: but certainly no web site can please everybody!&nbsp; I wouldn't trade our little sanctuary in the rough-and-tumble interwebs for anything!</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333588 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 20:54:24 +0000 Gaylene 1333588@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'd probably post WIW pictures if there was an area like the one MFF describes in her post where an outfit could be analyzed and critiqued in a helpful way. My feelings are like IK's in that it's just an outfit. If a comment resonated with me, I'd find the information useful; if a comment didn't fit my own ideas about how I want to look, I'd move on. To be honest, one of main reasons that I don't choose to post WIW pictures is because I don't think I'm comfortable with the idea of my picture on the internet followed by a bunch of personal, even if they were flattering, comments. On the other hand, a picture followed by an analytical, objective assessment of what is, and isn't, working in the outfit somehow de-personalizes the whole thing--the discussion is about the outfit, not me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/honest-feedback/page/6#post-1333507 Sun, 17 Aug 2014 19:23:53 +0000 ironkurtin 1333507@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'll be honest, I ignore opinions on clothing when I disagree.&nbsp; It's more about the social sharing part for me, so I'm not going to be flattened if someone hates my pants. I'm also willing to admit sometimes my pants choice might be bad, and if it is, well, live and learn. It's just a day in pants someone out there doesn't like -- it's happened before and I bet money it will inevitably happen again. There is always another day and, unluckily for my husband, more pants.</p> <p>But I do hear that many of you really take negative feedback -- even as a structured critique -- to heart.&nbsp; I also hear your reluctance to potentially hurt someone else because you don't know all the factors in their dressing decisions. Plus I hear the women who see cheerleading as a route to positive change. I respect all these points of view. I'd like to submit that seeing clothing as an outfit, not as a reflection on the person, can be extremely liberating - even when the person uses their clothing as a mode of self-expression.&nbsp; </p> <p>In any case, it's interesting how a comment on an outfit can potentially be such a minefield, isn't it? </p>