https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Tue, 21 Apr 2026 12:19:20 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903829 Tue, 03 Apr 2018 14:40:17 +0000 Carol 1903829@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ha!&nbsp;<b>Rachylou</b>, I saw that acronym on another post, and couldn't figure it out.&nbsp; Thanks.&nbsp;&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903731 Tue, 03 Apr 2018 07:21:55 +0000 rachylou 1903731@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I have to say, a lot of days it doesn’t really quite come together for me. It’s the shoes. Practicality wins. YLF always has the answer tho: the FFBO - the fast fall back outfit. Saves the day when I can’t think </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903702 Tue, 03 Apr 2018 02:24:22 +0000 gryffin 1903702@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Welcome Carol - I think we've all had periods of time where we felt like that.&nbsp; I did after I had my son.&nbsp; Dressing a new body, so tired.&nbsp; Agree there is no effortless.&nbsp; The great thing about YLF is it's a place to figure out your personal style.&nbsp; Whether it's following fashion, a personal vision or something in between.&nbsp; But effort, thought, experimentation, are part of the process.&nbsp; Effortless is the outcome of tremendous work when your wardrobe actually works for you and makes you happy.&nbsp; But like an impromptu, no one will guess the angst, work, calculation, and persistence that was required to make it all "effortless!" </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903682 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 23:41:46 +0000 Carol 1903682@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I find a lot of good stuff at the thrift stores here, because it's LA--there are rich people who get rid of great stuff.&nbsp; You do have to wade through a lot of junk, though.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903675 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 23:01:16 +0000 Greyscale 1903675@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes I do! I see that you're in LA so you have many of the same stores as me (San Francisco) -- I shop at Crossroads Trading and Wasteland. But over time I've become much pickier, and now I usually only look in the designer section. I do find that my thrift purchases are more likely to be failures, though. I'm trying to be good about really evaluating whether I want the item or I just love a bargain. Same goes for Nordstrom Rack. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903666 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 22:31:07 +0000 Ledonna N. 1903666@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>YES I HAVE&nbsp; lol Yes I'm yelling.&nbsp; For me it is an ebb and flow. Welcome to the boards.&nbsp; I take inspiration from the ladies here as well as Angie.&nbsp; I still stay true to who I am.&nbsp; I left the Army and had no clue so that is why I came here developed my style and then 10 years later had a baby had to get through my no maternity wardrobe at 43 now I'm trying to find my mama vs me style.&nbsp; You are certainly at the right place </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903655 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 21:58:36 +0000 Carol 1903655@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm sorry I can't respond to each and every one of you--you all had words of wisdom and encouragement.</p> <p>But I did want to say,&nbsp;<b>Joy</b>, that I loved reading your stories!&nbsp; It sounded like a Charles Dickens novel about a teaching assistant. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903627 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 20:12:40 +0000 Carol 1903627@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>Greyscale</b>, do you still shop at consignment stores? I do at least half my shopping at thrift stores.&nbsp;&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903620 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 19:31:31 +0000 Emily K 1903620@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Recently, I found a new quotation by which to live, "Do not compare your behind-the-scenes to everyone else's highlight reel." &nbsp;So true...and yet so inevitable that it happens! &nbsp;I am always catching myself thinking that people who do things well just somehow have effortless talent, but that is unfair to those people because it cheapens the effort that they put in (maybe recent, but maybe over a lifetime) of honing their craft to get to the point where they are now. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903593 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 17:35:28 +0000 Greyscale 1903593@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi Carol - I'm around your age and one thing I've noticed is that life is full of shifts that feel awkward for a while. Like shifting from one's college style to professional, or losing / gaining weight. Things get thrown apart and then settle back down eventually. </p> <p>I think my current style is defined, distinctive, feels like me. But 20 years ago I'm not sure I could have imagined that. In high school I was an outcast albeit with interesting clothes (the grunge era was kind to me). In college I happily wore men's jeans and tshirts. It wasn't a bad look but very different from what I wear these days. The first big awkward transition was college to grad school (2002). My grad school roommate basically staged an intervention. She got me some modern jeans (fitted, boot cut, not men's) and I finally started wearing a bra!</p> <p>Anyway, I just kept on shopping at consignment stores and honing my style, with more hits and fewer misses over time. For the past 5-10 years I've felt really comfortable in my wardrobe. There was no one moment when I felt like I'd 'made it' though. (To be honest, having a bit more money helped...)</p> <p>I developed my style by analyzing other people's clothes and browsing shops. Your path might be different - maybe your art student style is intuitive and you'll refine it with nicer items and more editing. Maybe you'll go back to the freewheeling student look with no problem. But in any case, it can be a lot of fun! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903569 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 16:03:31 +0000 Suz 1903569@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><i>Cardiff giro, we usually hang the empty garment over a target or tree or something and I stand back and watch. Also, I whoop and holler like an overgrown idiot LOL<br /></i><br />Cindysmith, now, <b>that </b>is what I call having fun with fashion!!</p> <p>Don't let your clothes boss you around, <b>Angie</b> always says.&nbsp;</p> <p><b>Carol</b>, 37 is a great age to return to having fun.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903467 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 07:30:52 +0000 tulle 1903467@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Welcome, Carol! I think you can see by the answers to your question how helpful and generous the members of this forum can be. Your response to Cocolion's thoughtful question is very telling--and very typical--I think:&nbsp; in our early twenties, slim-waisted and light-hearted, it's easy to feel attractive, whether concerned about fashion or not. I've watched my daughters go through this inventive phase, and as they get older, they, too, are becoming more tentative and self-conscious.&nbsp; Fashion "rules" are often stultifying, though fashion tricks can be useful and fun.&nbsp; Angie's advice about keeping the joy and emotional satisfaction in dressing has been liberating to me.&nbsp; It's all about reconnecting with and expressing your essential self, rather than trying to fit any pattern. You will find lots of encouragement for that here. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable/page/2#post-1903457 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 06:52:49 +0000 CocoLion 1903457@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Carol -- that is fascinating what you say about feeling stylish and free and non-chalant in college. &nbsp;I think you will be able to capture that feeling again by sticking with YLF and the help of Angie and the forum. :-)<br />Denise aka CocoLion </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903434 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 05:14:03 +0000 Bijou 1903434@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Carol, I definitely have days when nothing seems to work. That top that I thought would be great with the jeans... it just looks off somehow. Now when I buy something new, I do a try on session at home to see if it actually works with the things I thought it would and try different combinations. This is useful, because then when I am in a rush, I have an outfit to wear that I know works and not a trail of clothing that has been rejected. For special events, I always plan what I will wear and like to have a couple of options, depending upon how I am feeling (and weather conditions) on the day. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903418 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 03:40:48 +0000 Jenni NZ 1903418@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I like what La Ped and Windchime wrote, and what you wrote yourself about being an art student! I think for some of us at that young age, late teens early twenties, if we are lucky enough to have a nice figure and a bit of a fashion gene, that can be a great time. I was able to mix hand-me-downs, second-hand finds with the odd new trendy item usually on sale and seemed to shine. In fact once, when I was 20 I think, one of my girlfriends said ( after I'd been on a shopping trip) "You must be the most fashionable girl in the class!" Short red tartan mini dress, tights and gold slipper type shoes. But about the same outfit, one of the more staid young men asked another "Has Jenni gone punk?". Um, no. Don't think I'd ever been told I was the "most fashionable" before or since. Still love that girlfriend 37 years later! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903386 Mon, 02 Apr 2018 01:10:53 +0000 Windchime 1903386@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>For a period of time in my late 40’s, I felt unfashionable all the time. My body was changing, and I didn’t know anymore how to dress in a flattering way. Discovering and learning from YLF has made a huge difference for me. I’ll never have the finely-honed sense for style that some people have, but I generally feel good in my outfits now and frequently receive compliments on what I’m wearing. I still have the occasional day where I don’t feel fashionable; now it’s a matter of figuring what to tweak in that day’s outfit so it feels good. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903351 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 23:26:49 +0000 cindysmith 1903351@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Cardiff giro, we usually hang the empty garment over a target or tree or something and I stand back and watch. Also, I whoop and holler like an overgrown idiot LOL </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903333 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 21:41:36 +0000 LaPed 1903333@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Carol, I think your comment about feeling fashionable in college when you weren't even paying attention hits the nail on the head. It's a funny thing, isn't it? Often the best outfits are the ones that involve the least thought.</p> <p>Of course, a lot of people also miss their younger bodies or younger lifestyles, and figuring out how to feel effortless in one's current circumstances may require some, well, effort. It's behind-the-scenes work, and I'd bet 99% of the people you look at and think "Wow, s/he looks great!" do it to some degree: playing dress-up in their own closets, fiddling around with make-up or hair, scouring thrift stores for something totally unique, taking the time for a mani/pedi or a tooth whitening, etc, etc. You get the idea. Obviously you're much more aware of the "rules" now than you were at 18, but that in itself is an advantage. You get to decide which ones you want to follow and which ones you want to break. Just like being an art student -- you learn a basic framework of techniques and aesthetics, but to create something great and truly your own, you have to get to the point where you're confident enough to subvert what you've been taught. And the only way to get there is to keep trying, experimenting, refining.&nbsp;</p> <p>To answer your original question: I've always had something of a grain-of-salt approach to mainstream/contemporary fashion, but have always been very committed to maintaining and honing my personal style (you'll notice&nbsp; a lot of people make that fashion/style distinction). The last time I felt really lost in my own style was the first few months after DS was born; it wasn't so bad living in leggings and little tunics while pregnant, but postpartum it somehow became torture -- but nothing else fit! That's about when I started reading fashion/style blogs (mostly YLF and Already Pretty) and really pushing myself to "up my game" if you will. That was 4 years ago, and I'm fully back to feeling like myself these days. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903316 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 20:23:54 +0000 Jenni NZ 1903316@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi Carol and welcome from me too. I have been here just over a year and spent many hours on the site. It has helped me manage my love for clothes and particularly shoes in that I was getting an overflowing-our-space wardrobe that I wasn't wearing enough. I've made good improvements with that.<br /> As far as feeling "unfashionable", yes,so often. I'm like some of the others, I'd rather dress to be true to myself with a nod to trends only if they happen to suit me and also can be accomplished without spending hundreds of dollars yet be ethical and environmentally friendly ( that last part difficult to accomplish!). I'm happy with most of my outfits on a daily basis now. Not that I look amazing. Just that they're practical for my circumstances and they all have something that I really enjoy about them, whether it just be the texture or the shoes or the colour or the earrings </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903303 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 18:44:44 +0000 Carol 1903303@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>CocoLion</b>, you asked when I felt most fashionable.&nbsp; I think it was in college--it was a very confident time for me. I'd safety pin a maxi dress for optimal waistage in a haphazard way, or dye my hair pink and orange.&nbsp; Funnily enough, I wasn't paying a lot of attention to fashion, just doing my own thing.&nbsp; I wonder if paying more attention to rules and guidelines has frozen my creativity a little.&nbsp; At the same time, I really like learning the guidelines, because I want to look more adult.&nbsp; I'm 37--can't look like an art student forever.&nbsp;&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903294 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 18:00:23 +0000 Cardiff girl 1903294@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Cindysmith please tell me that you are not in those Jeans when you have people shooting at them.I m all for. bit of garment customisation but risking actual bodily harm might be taking it a step too far!<br /> Dear Carol,as you can see from the above replies feeling fashionable is not a natural state for most women.I think that’s because being fashionable is so hard to define especially as fashion by its very nature is in a constant state of reinvention,thereby engendering the feeling of never quite having achieved fashionability.Which in turn leads to striving to acheive something that is forever shifting and is therefore only fleetingly achievable if at all.Much better to seek individual style and for that you have come to the right place.I hope you enjoy the journey. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903225 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 13:22:28 +0000 cindysmith 1903225@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Welcome! Glad you found this delightful corner of the internet</p> <p>I often feel unfashionable, even here. Which seems counterintuitive, since this community is so very supportive. I tend to like some pretty RATE (Rough Around The Edges) stuff: deconstructed, distressed to the point of rags, tactical, and just plain odd. I've gotten such favorable feedback here (even when it's criticism, its friendly &amp; constructive), and yet I sometimes feel a little bit like...</p> <p>... Idon't belong here. Everyone here is so well dressed, so stylish, so pretty; then here comes Cindy with jeans that she literally let people shoot with shotguns (seriously, I've done that often) and I kind of feel like I need to be shipped off to the island of misfit toys. That feeling isn't about how my weirdness has been received here; quite the contrary. Everyone is always welcoming &amp; supportive. I'm just my own worst critic, asking myself "what are you even doing here hanging out with all these beautiful people in their beautiful clothes?"</p> <p>When I needed to be stylish and situationally appropriate for my baby sister's evening wedding, I came here and begged for help. Everybody was very helpful, and it was a very comforting feeling knowing that i had a highly respected pro (Angie) and so many stylish &amp; supportive women helping make sure i got it right. They got it so right that I'll definitely be wearing the star of that outfit for a long time in both formal and casual situations.</p> <p>So if you're feeling unfashionable, know that you are not alone. I've actually seen our resident subject matter expert (Angie) put out the call for assistance. If the pro has asked for assistance, then there's no shame in me asking for it, right? And if the pro has asked this bunch for assistance, then I figure I can trust this bunch too.</p> <p>So pull up a comfortable chair, poke around on the site and explore, and don't hesitate to post specific questions because that's what this place is here for<br /> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903223 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 13:11:36 +0000 BrieN 1903223@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Unfashionable? I went for years in T-shirts from Target and shorts or chinos as I chased my kids around. And then without a plan I'd buy a single statement piece from a local boutique or TJ Maxx and of course still have nothing to wear. I'm not exactly fashionable now--more likely I'd say "put together". But knowing that i have something i love in my closet to wear to most every occasion = priceless </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903222 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 13:10:46 +0000 Mainelady 1903222@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am not very trendy, so if that translates to fashionable, then I am often not. I like putting together outfits that help me look and feel my best. I am defining and refining my personal style. My personal style works well for me in my lifestyle. There may be other settings where my personal style would not be considered fashionable or stylish, but I have to be ok with that. First and foremost I have to be me. An important part of being authentic to my style is to always include at least one happiness factor to my outfit. Always!<br /> I care about making an effort and it does take time, consideration, trial and error and a willingness to learn. I have discovered so many aspects of style (color, fit, silhouette, trends, basics, essentials, completers, statements) here on YLF. I have discovered an amazing support group, too!<br /> Enjoy the journey. Fashion and style are processes and ever evolving. I am not sure there is a final destination. I think there are always going to be new goals and adventures up ahead. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903215 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 11:48:44 +0000 Toban 1903215@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Unfashionable? Feels like I always feel that. Stylish? I accomplish this more often. I think of fashionable as trend setting or on trend and I am a late to never adopter of trends and rarely deviate from my preferred silhouettes and colors. But stylish to me means that I have identified what best suits me, and while this takes some effort, it takes less over time once you’ve found your personal style “rules”. The YLF blog and forum are an amazing resource to help identify how to make something work, from perfect pant length, to the right type of top for different styles of skirts, etc... I love that Angie gives us tips on incorporating on trend pieces, and it has helped me to expand my style direction. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903205 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 10:51:06 +0000 Anonymous 1903205@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This is such a great question. &nbsp;The short answer is an <b>emphatic YES</b>. &nbsp;There is a long answer .... but I have to figure it out for myself before I can post about it. &nbsp;Thank you for giving me something to analyze over the next few days. &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903168 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 06:12:39 +0000 CocoLion 1903168@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>The MORE effort I make, the more stylish I feel. &nbsp;As for being fashionable, I went through a phase between 1 and 4 years on the forum where I wanted to be in the trendiest clothes, all the time. &nbsp;I got that out of my system and now I'm going back to modern classic with a bit of avant - boho I throw in the mix from time to time (and as &nbsp;result of prior trendy phase -- some of the trendy pieces I acquired actually had staying power).</p> <p>What are some of the times you did feel fashionable? &nbsp;If you never actually felt that way, when did you feel great in your clothes, and why? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903162 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 05:53:21 +0000 krishnidoux 1903162@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Welcome to you! Yes it's effort as others have said, but the good news is that you don't have to do a lot for results. You dont have to go all out and start shopping for hours on end (please don't do that!). But just one happy item carefully selected - like a pair of particualrily cute white tennis for example - can change everything. For me, a turning point was when I participated in an painting-inspired dress challenge on the forum and discovered thanks to Angie I could pair red earrings with army green and navy shades. This opened up a whole new world to me, and I realized I had been stuck in a certain stiff, matchy-matchy and somewhat myth-ridden image of what dressing fashionably meant. Once you reach that point, you start looking at yourself differently, try on things in a new way, and that's when the fun begins.&nbsp;</p> <p><b>Joy</b>, what a journey yours has been! My heart goes out to you! I am impressed at how far you have come.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903159 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 05:30:41 +0000 Anonymous 1903159@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>OH, yes! The worst was college. I had to live on $10 a month and most went for food. My first roommate would not be seen with me in my own clothes and insisted that I wear hers. A prof called me a little brown mouse ( most of my wardrobe was given to me from by a kind aunt who was coming out of a brown period). My advisor criticized my student teaching clothes ( same brown capsule...good quality, horrible fit). Friends took clothes for me from the drama department closet. My favorite pieces were worn when I was in the 5th grade and had been my mother's, bought pre-WWII. It could not have been much worse but there was nothing I could do until I got a job. Even then I needed to help my younger sister get through college. I am so grateful to Angie and this community for so much guidance and encouragement. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/have-you-ever-felt-really-unfashionable#post-1903145 Sun, 01 Apr 2018 03:09:11 +0000 Jaime 1903145@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Welcome! I don't think it would actually be much fun if style were effortless. Style and understanding fashion are skills and you have come to a wonderful place to learn and practice. </p>