https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Tue, 21 Apr 2026 19:14:53 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2055174 Fri, 23 Aug 2019 12:36:44 +0000 RobinF 2055174@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wow Opaline, you really did cut it! I'm not that brave but it would make the transition easier for sure and shows off your pretty face. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2055122 Fri, 23 Aug 2019 05:26:46 +0000 Anonymous 2055122@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I took extreme measures recently and totally chopped mine off. Hair today. Gone tomorrow.<br /> It was growing in patchy (brown/white/grey) since my 30s and was suffering from health stuff (Lupus/Thyroid) and didn’t wanna keep putting chemicals on it to keep it brown.<br /> I’m 46 next month and I understand the concern of appearing older. I empathize. That said, I really like your new growth color. And I love ombre color, I think it can grow out looking really stylish. I don’t think it will age you based on your pictures.<br /> I wish my growth were a solid color, but I am game to go with what I have. :)</p> <p>As for comments though, first thing my Dad said was ‘Why on Earth would you do that??’ !!<br /> He’s since adjusted. Or pretends to have! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2055071 Thu, 22 Aug 2019 21:39:22 +0000 Barbara Diane 2055071@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I wish I had been on the forum when I did this. My hair was long, grows slow, and took forever to grow out. Years. I definitely would have cut it shorter so it would have looked better sooner.</p> <p>I love your natural color. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2054298 Mon, 19 Aug 2019 18:03:59 +0000 karen13 2054298@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Late to see this and to chime in but I strongly encourage you to keep going. Recognize this is the worst stage. There are many good tips here if it makes you crazy but I think it looks great </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2054071 Sun, 18 Aug 2019 21:34:19 +0000 Vix 2054071@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi again Robin --</p> <p>re the toner, I'm not much help...my stylist used something pretty standard to take down the brassiness. [I had semi-perm dark brown which had always started getting red as it faded, then I had started doing 2/year highlights to help "blend the grey" and THAT'S what really did me in when I started transitioning, ugh, as I'd had my last highlight 2 months before.&nbsp;</p> <p>My stylist only did a toner on me twice (IIRC 6 weeks apart) and then I just used a conditioner for blondes (!) the rest of the time.</p> <p>If I could give another few tips -- coloring monthly meant I got a monthly clarifying shampoo plus deep condition. When I stopped that was only happening at cuts (~ 8-10 weeks) and man -- my hair got into a lot of trouble! I don't even use a lot of product but there was build-up, and then inefficient conditioning, etc.</p> <p>Grey hair tends to dehydrate very easily from sun / environment, and can look coarse due to that. Like most, my grey is actually finer than my dark hair parts -- google Philip Kingsley for more on that if interested. So I rec experimenting with the type and frequency of conditioning your "new" hair needs to help it look its best.</p> <p>Good luck! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2054049 Sun, 18 Aug 2019 18:50:36 +0000 Anonymous 2054049@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I have to applaud you because I just cannot do it, yet. I use a demi permanent dye and at this point just going a tad bit lighter each year. Right now I am using a dark natural blonde and will soon be doing a half/half mixture of dark and medium natural blonde. Eventually I will get there. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053969 Sun, 18 Aug 2019 11:55:04 +0000 Roxanna 2053969@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I went natural about 2 years ago (around 40) after coloring for 10 years. I had absolutely no comments when growing it out (probably because people didn't know what to say!) But once I grew it out, I got lots of compliments and still do (particularly since I cut it into an edgier style.) Or took me a while to find my groove (thicker eyebrows, stronger makeup, edgier style) but once I did, I feel more like me then ever. I say go for it! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053962 Sun, 18 Aug 2019 10:17:43 +0000 Mainelady 2053962@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi RobinF! I haven’t been on the boards much lately, but am very glad I didn’t miss your post. I have only read a few of the comments, because I wanted to reply. Suz, I did see your comment. Thank you for the compliment to my silver whisperer stylist and your kind comments.<br /> RobinF. Yay for you! It sounds like you are really ready for this change and I think that is the most important part. I love your pics! Your natural hair color is coming in beautifully! You have a radiant smile and that is what I think people will notice first.<br /> IMO you don’t need to do anything other than maintain your healthy hair. If I had thought my transition would have been as lovely as yours, I would have given it a try. I was not at all confident and relied heavily on my stylist to help me. That is what worked for me. Your journey is your own and you should do what you feel is best for you.<br /> Please continue to post updates! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053918 Sun, 18 Aug 2019 02:17:59 +0000 Echo 2053918@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Your natural color is SO beautiful! It will be well worth the effort to grow it out. However, it can become awkward when you hair is half-and-half, and highlights or even simply dying the rest to match your natural color might be worthwhile. I have grey coming in, and I have not colored it away. My hair is longer, and I would rather keep the grey than color and eventually have to deal with the stripe.</p> <p>My mum colored her hair for years, and at first she just highlighted to disguise the grey. But then her entire head was eventually a light to medium brown that she never was even close to naturally. I encouraged her to grow out her natural color (her hair is quite short and always has been), and it is stunning. A truly salt and pepper, steely sort of color.</p> <p>I think you will be very pleased with your hair when it completely grows out. The in-progress stage can be tough, but it will be worth it! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053830 Sat, 17 Aug 2019 19:10:18 +0000 Gretchen 2053830@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Very late to the thread, but chiming in with more encouragement. I think you are going to be very pleased w the final result. I love the idea of darkening the ends so you have a full ombré while growing out, or maybe doing some light lights on the crown to smooth the transition? </p> <p>I have to say I’m envious of those who can make the transition and have a gorgeous head of silver or white hair. Can’t wait to see your new do! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053739 Sat, 17 Aug 2019 12:07:46 +0000 RobinF 2053739@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Jules, you’re probably right that the halfway will be awkward. I’ll have to keep an open mind for ways to help the transition.</p> <p>Cindy, thanks telling me how you did it, I think yours is gorgeous! I have considered doing an all-over lighter shade but kind of want to get it over with. That could be a great solution though if I get to where I can’t stand it. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053681 Sat, 17 Aug 2019 02:51:14 +0000 cindysmith 2053681@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>When I got ready to let mine go, I was dying my hair a pretty intense, dark red/auburn (sort of black cherry, maybe?) I had to do mine in stages, because the "skunk stripe" effect was just so jarring. I had a friend who had made the transition from jet black to growing out her white hair by having her stylist do a sort of ombre effect, so that's what I did but gradually because I'm not an expert. I started doing my roots a mid-brown-red sort of thing, and I did that for a few months. Then I went with a dark strawberry blonde for a couple of months, then a lighter strawberry blonde for a short while, then I quit doing anything to the roots. I</p> <p>Ultimately, it was worth the pain in the arse because now "marshmallow hair" and "toasted coconut" hair are all the rage and people are spending a fortune to get their hair white and I don't have to do anything but a purple conditioner to keep the brassy notes away.</p> <p>Good luck with your journey, I hope you find it to be as 'worth it' as I have </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053545 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 18:15:20 +0000 Jules 2053545@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It looks pretty darn good I’d say. At the half &amp; half mark it may get a bit awkward? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053508 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 16:28:28 +0000 Elizabeth P 2053508@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><div>I don't have time to properly respond to this now (so much to say!) but just wanted to chime in to encourage you.&nbsp; Your hair is going to be gorgeous.&nbsp; And it looks fine in those photos :)</div><div><br /></div><div>I did a blonde streak in the front of my hair, so it would look "purposeful" and not like I was just lazy.&nbsp; I think the silver/grey/platinum colour is much better now than went I went grey - I had to do a blonde streak but I bet you could do a more grey one.&nbsp; I also did some very very thin lowlights just in my part area when my stripe was 2-3", to lessen the impact without setting me back too far.&nbsp; <br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Good luck!<br /></div><div><br /></div> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053460 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 13:43:26 +0000 Bijou 2053460@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Robin, growing out hair can be a challenge, you look lovely. I do like Brooklyn’s suggestion to go even more ombré and extreme in dying the ends of your hair.</p> <p>I know my Mum would have had a similar reaction to your Mum. You need to wear your hair in a way that makes you happy. Silver hair is beautiful, as many forum members prove. So great that DH is supportive. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053445 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 12:37:13 +0000 RobinF 2053445@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wow thank you all so much! I knew I was coming to the right place for support!</p> <p>Molly Mac - thank you for the pictures, great to see someone making it work!</p> <p>Janet - I also had short hair for many years but it doesn't work on me any more. I think that is my mom's fear about her own gray, that it is patchy and not pretty. I actually may be grayer than she is (hard to tell of course since she's always colored it) which is ironic since her mom had beautiful white hair and is probably where I get mine.</p> <p>Jenava - I agree that I should just leave it, faster grow out is a big plus!</p> <p>Sal - you made me laugh - I don't have a lot of cellulite so maybe it's a trade-off!</p> <p>Runcarla - Moms are funny aren't they? I wonder if I do that to my daughter...</p> <p>The Cat - thank you so much for the detailed response! Good advice re:colors and this would be a good time for me to start on it. Those are all colors I wear and like but I'll have to pay closer attention to the golds and beige's that I wear. My eyes are gray but look blue sometimes so I think the colors will be good.</p> <p>JAileen - thanks! Maybe it will look like yours!</p> <p>juli - interesting that you get more compliments now, that's always nice</p> <p>Vix - you mention a toner, any recommendations? I'm interested in that idea</p> <p>Pil - I said the same thing a year ago, I think I'm ready now but it took me a while</p> <p>Suz - I think your comments are very helpful, keep 'em coming!</p> <p>Kathie - I wish i hadn't colored all these years then maybe it would be easier</p> <p>Laurel - good ideas, I'll have to experiment with some scarves or clips</p> <p>Brooklyn - I love the way you think - I am intrigued by the idea of darker tips, hmmm</p> <p>Shevia - thank you so much! I am a bit worried that it will never look like me in the mirror - I told myself I have to give it enough time even when grown out to know if I actually like it. The authenticity issue is tricky because I feel pretty authentic as a brunette!</p> <p>Bonnie - thanks! I do think it's pretty but it's just a big change</p> <p>Nancy - I agree a good cut helps it look intentional. And younger :)</p> <p>Lyn67 - thanks for the wonderful compliments! It was fun to all be together, doesn't happen too often these days.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053440 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 11:25:53 +0000 lyn67 2053440@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wow, your silver roots are so fab!!!!-but can so relate to your fears. Otherwise than putting in more&nbsp; highlights, or cutting it shorter, you could for ex. wear a pony tail for posing in&nbsp; picties -or&nbsp; use a hat-or a hair band on top of your head -then the longer brown hair will not show from a front view. But frankly you have such a gorgeous hair, lots of texture!! Beautiful family picties, too!:-) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053419 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 04:27:51 +0000 NancyW 2053419@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><div>Your white hair is dramatic and beautiful. I colored my hair from the late 80's until August 2018. My dull medium brown had a little gray by age 24,&nbsp; but I was reacting to the sad brown more than the gray when I started coloring. Over the last 15 years of color it was highlights and lowlights and I let the fringe go natural. Now that all the dyed hair is gone, I love the the white in the front and am just tolerating the rest.&nbsp; My head is too grey and not white enough! My secret: I don't look at what I don't like. My hair was always medium to short and cut into layers - that may be easier than a blunt cut. I suggest the shortest and sharpest bob you can bear and cut it regularly. There is something about a great haircut that makes the look seem more intentional. Good luck</div> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053417 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 04:06:03 +0000 Bonnie 2053417@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>If my hair looked like yours, I would definitely let it grow out. It's a beautiful shade of silver.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053413 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 03:40:53 +0000 Jaime 2053413@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>There is so much great advice and encouragement on this thread! I stopped coloring my hair about 7 years ago when I was 46 and will add a few variations on the theme:<br />1. The transition is the hardest, when it is not clear if what your are doing is intentional or not. You are lucky that your dyed hair is light so the difference is not that harsh, but it will take patience.<br />2. I went for the big chop to hasten the transition, but the real transition was in the next couple of years where I had to get used to seeing myself in the mirror.<br />3. I have never received a rude comment such as Anchie did (and I would be fuming if I had). But I have noticed that certain older than me women, with dyed hair, are the most resentful and tend to say things to indicate I am older than I am (ie as old or older than they are). Younger women have been incredibly encouraging, wishing their hair would be my color (haha) or their mother would do the same, or asking if it is natural, and definitely indicating that they plan to go grey when the time comes. (Of course only time will tell and fashions change.)<br />4. I do not go along with the idea that not dying is more authentic. Not at all! I wear more makeup not less now, does that mitigate my authenticity? We are born with our hair color and greying pattern but what we do with it is authentic whether it involves changing it or not.&nbsp;<br />5. On the other hand, my hair grows VERY fast and not having roots (very apparent against my very dark original color) makes me feel much better about myself. And I hated dying my hair either myself or in the salon.<br />Too long! Anyway good luck! You look terrific in your pictures! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053404 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 02:13:43 +0000 Brooklyn 2053404@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I actually love the ombré effect and I would be tempted to continue it, maybe even intensify it, by dyeing the tips darker. Your silver grey hair is a wonderful colour. But it will look great even if you go silver all the way. </p> <p>And, I must say, you have lovely skin and a young looking face. You look great in the photos! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053402 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 02:04:45 +0000 Laurel 2053402@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I stopped coloring and it was pretty painless----but my natural color wasn't TOO far off from the "boost" I was giving it.... And, I did shorten my hair at one point to be done with the dyed ends once and for all.&nbsp;</p> <p>I had this idea, since the "wind blowing" photos gave you pause,.. what if you wore a small headband or scarf and wore your hair off your face and back? &nbsp;The part would disappear, and the front section might JUST show your natural color. &nbsp;I'd experiment with a headband or narrow tied scarf and see what that looks like! It's that PART which drove me crazy, and I tried to avoid having a part as much as possible during the grow out. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement/page/2#post-2053394 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 01:36:24 +0000 Kathie 2053394@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Chiming in with support! Your natural color is beautiful, and your cut is super flattering. No personal experience, as my brown hair is graying naturally. So many YLFers have fabulous gray hair, and that definitely has encouraged me not to dye my own. Good luck! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement#post-2053392 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 01:35:02 +0000 Suz 2053392@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Of course I can't leave this subject alone. :)&nbsp;</p> <p>I was also one of the first among my similar-age friends to stop colouring. Older friends had paved the way, though, and that inspired me. And now it seems to be a trend. Like the Cat, I get more compliments on my colour now than I did when I was "assisting it," &nbsp;most often from younger people but also from people my age and older who are still colouring.&nbsp;</p> <p>I think Vix is very wise -- the "in between" stage is really the worst and it is so difficult to judge what your natural colour will look like when there is still colour hanging on in the rest of your hair.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement#post-2053385 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 00:06:16 +0000 pil 2053385@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Robin, the silver is beautiful! I wish I was brave enough to do the same. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement#post-2053383 Thu, 15 Aug 2019 23:51:45 +0000 Vix 2053383@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi Robin --<br /> Quick note of encouragement from me. Honestly you're in a good place with your growout...a few more inches and it will start to look intentionally ombre, then you'll be done! </p> <p>When I grew out my grey with shoulder-length or so hair I found i couldn't really get a feel for how it would look til all the old color was gone. 16 months, fun. I told myself I could always dye it back but I needed to judge the After not the During. </p> <p>So try to hold on. I have no regrets (and a mother who's horrified) and think you sound very ready to get to the other side!</p> <p>I wonder if you might need just a toner to offset any brassiness in the fading dyed part? I think your natural color looks great with your skin tone.</p> <p>Ps first of my local friends to stop dyeing so I feel you. Can count 1 recruit (co-worker) and you never know who you might inspire...the YLFers inspired me! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement#post-2053382 Thu, 15 Aug 2019 23:45:42 +0000 Vix 2053382@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Double post! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement#post-2053377 Thu, 15 Aug 2019 23:25:53 +0000 julijuli 2053377@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think it looks great! I did go the highlight/lowlight route but now that I’m through that phase I have gotten so many compliments on my grey hair. Way more than I ever did on the colored version!! Hang in there - the best part is that your hair will feel so healthy!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement#post-2053367 Thu, 15 Aug 2019 22:32:38 +0000 JAileen 2053367@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Your new natural color is lovely. When I decided to go grey, I discussed it with my stylist. We ended up going with blonde highlights. This made it more natural looking (less contrasty). I think she did that for a few months.</p> <p>Anchie’s hair is gorgeous, and anyone disparaging it is an idiot.</p> <p>I get lots of positive comments, and very few negative ones. I don't care what anyone says, I like it so there! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/growing-out-the-gray---need-encouragement#post-2053363 Thu, 15 Aug 2019 22:17:12 +0000 The Cat 2053363@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You are fortunate to grow out radiant silver white hair. And it looks gorgeous with your healthy glowing skin and beautiful eyes!</p> <p>I do understand that the "growing out time" feels long and boring, but please try to endure! Both you and others will probably be amazed when seeing the striking result in some months!</p> <p>In the meantime, start experimenting with some new-to-you colours and patterns, and try to identify which ones suit you best. In particular, start with items near your face. Try white pearls, statement silver jewellery, and scarves in clear cool colours and patterns including white or silver. A scarf or top in a pattern combining three colours similar to your hair colour, skin colour and eye colour will emphasize your unique beauty. Remember to experiment with lipstick colours too.</p> <p>I know you love neutrals, but try combining them with more visible colours. Do you have blue eyes, or at least a hint of blue in your eyes? If so, I bet clothes in shades of blue will look wonderful with your colouring. Try bright or medium blue tops and scarves. And deep blue might prove to be a beautiful and versatile neutral for you.</p> <p>My hair started turning grey when I was in my early twenties. But there were only relatively few grey hairs here and there, so for many years, I more or less camouflaged them, by highlights, lowlights, and dark dye. But ever since I was a child, I had actually admired silver white hair and looked forward to get it myself. However, it took many years before most of my hair had become grey or white.</p> <p>When I was in my early forties, I realized that I had so much grey hair that I was forced to dye the roots every fortnight, and then I stopped. During the following months, I edited my wardrobe, got rid of colours that no longer worked for me, and concentrated on wearing colours that looked great with my "new" colouring.</p> <p>In my experience, younger people have been the most positive ones to my grey/white hair. In the beginning, I did sense that a few people my age, and some more in my parents' generation, were a bit skeptical or somewhat surprised (perhaps because they themselves were afraid to look old with grey hair). However, the skepticism didn't last long. In fact, I have never received so many compliments from people in all age groups--sometimes even from complete strangers--as after I stopped colouring my hair. The same might very well happen to you! </p>