https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Thu, 30 Apr 2026 16:12:04 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts/page/2#post-63624 Mon, 04 May 2009 15:46:54 +0000 merry77 63624@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Tarzy - I'd love a great recommendation, but I'm far away from LA! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts/page/2#post-63620 Mon, 04 May 2009 15:30:04 +0000 tarzy 63620@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Merry - if you're in the Los Angeles area I can recommend a wonderful stylist!</p> <p>I also caved and colored again this weekend. I guess I'm just not ready yet. But it's still on my mind. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts/page/2#post-63601 Mon, 04 May 2009 13:40:28 +0000 merry77 63601@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>An update on going gray:</p> <p>Well, I'm not getting very far finding a new hairdresser. When I went last week, the lady did not do at all what I asked for, and there are lots of long straggly pieces sticking out on the bottom. And it cost twice as much as the last place I went, and she talked non-stop during the session but to everyone except for me. I don't like it when people ask lots of personal questions the first time you see them, but I think it's rude to carry on conversation with everyone else in the room except your client. And if she was paying more attention to me (the one paying her, you know?), maybe my hair would look better. So anyway, have to try somewhere else next time. </p> <p>My hair is much shorter than I wanted for now, so I guess I'm already partly to the short hair thing. I'm just disappointed because I wanted to make it a dramatic change when I did. Sigh.</p> <p>I'm having mixed feelings about the whole thing. I went back to Ohio (where we moved from last summer) to visit this weekend. One of my dearest friends decided to stop coloring since we'd seen her last. She's pretty much all gray instead of the reddish blond she'd been coloring her hair for years, and she's in her early 50's. Her hair looks good, but it didn't have nearly the same personality. It was shocking to see the change though. One day she was wearing a black top and silver and pewter jewelry and the next day she wore a brown top with an animal print scarf. The black was better than the brown, but I think colors would have been a big improvement. I love to wear black and brown, so I'll have to be careful to add more color options in my wardrobe for close to my face.</p> <p>The trip was interesting because I hadn't really thought about this before, but there were lots more women with gray hair in my circle of friends and acquaintances in Ohio than where I live now. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts/page/2#post-62095 Thu, 23 Apr 2009 19:05:12 +0000 judy 62095@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks everyone for this thread and the links. I am about two chapters in to Diana's book which I found in a used bookstore yesterday (for 7.98, brand new...not sure why it's so expensive at Amazon? <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Going-Gray-Looking-Great-Unfading/dp/0743246802/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&#038;s=books&#038;qid=1240513015&#038;sr=8-3" rel="nofollow">http://www.amazon.com/Going-Gr.....038;sr=8-3</a> ) Though I made the transition from dyed to naturally graying brown hair about five years ago, I still vacillate at times but something always comes along to say "don't dye it". Her book is just the confidence boost I was needing this week...thanks again. I say try it if you want, or transition slowly. It's like nature is coloring your hair for you, it's an adventure and you can see how you feel about it. Who knew there was so much support out there? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts/page/2#post-62092 Thu, 23 Apr 2009 18:50:15 +0000 tarzy 62092@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm definitely an "over-analyzer" too, so I completely understand.</p> <p>By the way - I got red frames a few months ago (with the wonderful help of Angie and this forum) and I love them. They work for me now, and I think will also be great if I do go grey. I highly endorse red frames! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts/page/2#post-62083 Thu, 23 Apr 2009 17:46:50 +0000 merry77 62083@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I don't think you hijacked it at all! The psychology of gray is all through this thread, and your situation is an example of that. </p> <p>I don't know I would say I'm aware of my feelings and options. I just like to over-analyze everything! I'll definitely have to take lots of notes, and I'll probably change my mind a few times along the way. </p> <p>My son and husband were laughing last night when I was coloring my hair since I had already told them I was thinking about going gray. It was semi-permanent hair color instead of permanent, so it is a change. And they both agreed that my glasses are too boring for gray hair. I'm thinking about red or a purplish-blue for frames, and they were a little freaked out about the idea. It will be an adventure for sure. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-62071 Thu, 23 Apr 2009 16:54:51 +0000 tarzy 62071@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sorry Merry - I didn't mean to hijack your thread with my tale of woe! It's a challenging time right now, and sometimes I get a little lost in it all. </p> <p>You seem very aware of your feelings and options, and I'd love to hear about your journey through this process! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-62047 Thu, 23 Apr 2009 13:01:03 +0000 merry77 62047@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Christine - I've looked at so many gray hair articles and sites in the last couple days that I don't remember where I saw what. If you are interested in going gray (which will probably be in a little while since you're only at 10%), I did come across several things about curly, gray hair. I know one recommendation was to avoid blow drying because it increases frizz. Most of the tips focused on making sure your hair is super-healthy no matter whether it's curly or straight or wavy.</p> <p>Tarzy - It is interesting to think about what effect it could have on your job search. I came across a couple articles about that idea, but it was all based on hypothetical discussion, not necessarily anybody's actual experience. Several people who had gone gray already talked about positive reactions because of them having the courage to go against the grain, be theirselves, etc., but I think all of them were already in an established position. Age does not always equal experience or abilities, but so much of experience and abilities comes with age that is really a disgrace that so much emphasis is on youth. I hope people come to their senses soon so you can end the job search. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-62026 Thu, 23 Apr 2009 02:58:15 +0000 tarzy 62026@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Shiny - I did use a lighter brown for a while, but it just didn't look right to me. I don't know if it's because I'm used to seeing myself with dark hair against fair skin, or if it just wasn't the right color. I used a lighter brown, but it looked mousy on me. (Since I'm still unemployed, I just don't have the money to go to the salon right now. I dye it myself, and I'm sure it isn't the best it could be.)</p> <p>I also have curly/frizzy hair, and I worry a lot about that "grey mop of frizz" thing. I don't want to look like an old poodle! </p> <p>To add to my confusion - I'm having such a hard time with job hunting now, and I know that age has something to do with it. I live in LA and often apply for jobs that are connected in some way to the entertainment industry - this is a very age-conscious town. I have already experienced very subtle (but very real) age-discrimination, and I don't look anywhere near my real age. If I walk in with grey hair, I fear I'll never get past the receptionist! On the other hand, I'm so sick of that kind of thinking, and I wonder if by being more authentic, I might actually open other doors for myself. But reality is reality, and I need to start earning money soon - so it's probably not the best time to make such a huge decision! But this is all very much on my mind right now. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-62020 Thu, 23 Apr 2009 02:11:39 +0000 ChristineB 62020@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This is such an interesting topic, and so timely to many of us!!</p> <p>Shiny - my Dad skipped the 'steel' grey stage &#38; went from med-dark brown hair (with blue eyes) to pepper &#38; salt, to more salt then pepper to snow white. My mom dyed her hair for years &#38; years before going grey, and she was also pretty much white when she stopped the dying. She started off med brown hair &#38; green hazel eyes (I have her coloring).</p> <p>I agree with Shiny that it's the texture/lack of shine that makes people look older. I never thought of it that way, but it makes sense. So, where does that leave us curly hairs? That's another reason I'm concerned about greying. If the way to look like a young grey haired person requires flat irons, or even curlers &#38; curling irons, I want no part of it. One thing I love most about my hair is its low maintenance. I've finally started to figure out what hair products to use in my brown hair, I don't really want to start over trying to find products to use with grey hair.</p> <p>And here I am talking like I'm SOO grey, which I'm not. I'm 33 and less than 10% grey. It's very interesting to think about, though!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61989 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 16:20:43 +0000 merry77 61989@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I haven't seen anything with before and after pics that show before NATURAL hair color. Most of the before pics are dyed hair, so it wouldn't show the difference. I'm not sure on that either. I've been looking at my maternal aunt's color and my dad's and my roots to try to guess about what it will look like. My dad's is a beautiful sterling silver with just a bit of dark brown/black now. My aunt's is pretty close to the same color now, but had a lot of yellowish tint through the years.</p> <p>I'm hoping it ends up more like my dad's than my aunt's, but I think her salt &#38; pepper over the years would have looked better if she had done some of the deep conditioning treatments and used a purple shampoo and some of the other tricks to add shine. I love my sweet aunt, but she is definitely not anyone's style inspiration! She never colored and started graying young, but because she dressed old-lady (poly pants with elastic waist, floral tees, holday sweatshirts, etc) she looked old. I will definitely not be doing that </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61986 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 16:10:55 +0000 shiny 61986@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Merry, that sounds like exactly all the right reasons for going gray. I am a big believer/recent convert in embracing what you've got and working with it. </p> <p>Thanks for the link - very interesting. I am wondering if in your web research you've found anything that talks about/shows pics of "before" and "after's"? I am very curious about this. For example, my DH was a reddish brunette with green eyes; now he is a distinguished blue-gray. His mom, who was a blonde with blue eyes, and very fair, is white as snow. My mom was a dark brunette with reddish highlights and dark brown eyes with fair skin and she also first went blue-gray and is now white. My dad, who's coloring is very similar to my own (we bear a strong resemblance to each other), skipped the gray part and went right to white. So I am curious if there is any general consensus out there, i.e., if you originally were this color, you can probably expect you'll go gray-silver/gray-blue/snow white etc.? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61981 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 15:58:50 +0000 merry77 61981@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Shiny - Diana talks a little bit about a treatment like that here <a href="http://goinggraylookinggreat.com/diana_does_silverizing" rel="nofollow">http://goinggraylookinggreat.c.....ilverizing</a> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61979 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 15:55:23 +0000 merry77 61979@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I understand I think, Shiny, although that is not an issue for DH and I. He just has a few gray hairs, but he is balding so if I gray while he balds, we'll be about even But my dad (same genes!) went gray very young and people give my parents funny looks and think he's our grandpa instead of dad, especially since I have a 15 year old brother! I don't know that my mom ever thought much about it, but people seem confused sometimes by the whole thing.</p> <p>I'm not sure I would mind looking older than I do. People often think we are younger than we actually are, and sometimes that brings up questions about how long we've been married and how old our son is and why we don't have more children. And not that it really matters, but our son was born eight and a half months after we got married but to someone else entirely. He joined our family at the age of 9. And we wanted (still want - not sure) more children but it just didn't happen the way we planned, but discussions of us looking younger than we are often bring up issues that are totally unrelated. I know I don't have to say anything about any of it to anyone who asks, but it still at least brings up the issues in my mind. </p> <p>But people's perception of your age can be a good thing or a bad thing or a neutral thing. There are disadvantages no matter what you do.</p> <p>On the financial note, I found this great blog through the Going Gray site <a href="http://www.rockthesilver.com/rock_the_silver/" rel="nofollow">http://www.rockthesilver.com/rock_the_silver/</a>. She has a post about the added costs (for her at least) of going gray, but she also went through a lot of other changes at the same time. (And I love her glasses!)</p> <p>I guess for me it's not necessarily financial or wanting to look older or anything like that. I think it has more to do with trying to work with my body and my features and not against it and trying to embrace it. And in some ways, it's kind of a "stick it to the man" rebellion (from School of Rock). I do care what other people think, but I don't want to have my life choices dictated by what other people think I should do.</p> <p>Whew. Who knew hair color could be so philosophical? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61974 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 15:47:36 +0000 bella 61974@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This is a great topic, something I have been thinking about a lot lately, too.<br /> I am 29 and I have inherited my mom's genes, who went gray early on (in her early 30s she had a fair amount of gray hair and she never dyed her hair).<br /> I realize that I already have about 10% gray hair. It is not very noticeable (except to me) but it reminds me that this is a decision that I will have to make sooner or later. For now, I dye my hair - not because it is gray but I like a slightly darker and shinier tone than my original color.<br /> My biggest fear is looking older than I am. Over the years, I have observed my mother, who to me is a really dashing women with a super short haircut and beautiful gray hair, receive compliments on her looks from strangers. I am very proud of her. On the other hand, there is a little story that my mom tells me from time time. Apparently when I was very little (and I don't remember this now), I used to ask my grandmas whether my mom was old, because she looked older than other children's mothers in my school!:( It is a funny story, but I can tell from the way my mom tells this story that this hurt her a little bit and I don't want my children to think that I am old. Not to mention that I don't have any children or have any short term plans to have children so I will be probably older than my mother when I have kids.:( Lots of things to think about! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61972 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 15:45:15 +0000 shiny 61972@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Tarzy, have you considered a compromise? Instead of going gray now, since your face is so young looking, you could simply dye your hair lighter instead, something that would blend better with the roots? This would buy you some time to get used to seeing yourself in the mirror with a lighter, different hair color, while taking away some of the burden of your current maintenance regimine. </p> <p>You mentioned mousiness and this is my biggest pet peeve about my own natural hair color. Hair dye -even if it is the same exact shade- takes away the mousiness and adds luster, depth, etc. It also changes the texture. So the trouble with mousy hair isn't the color per se. </p> <p>My biggest fear about going gray is also not the color, because I think gray hair can be very pretty AND flattering - it's the texture, lack of luster, etc. If they made a gray hair dye or glaze that could add all that back in, that would be great. I wonder why they don't have anything like that? I bet it would sell like hot cakes. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61971 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 15:32:39 +0000 shiny 61971@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I don't think you have to go super-short hair if you go gray. I looked through that Going Gray web site yesterday and it sounds like the issue isn't hair length but learning to work with the texture of gray hair, which is very different: it is a lot drier, less shiny, and prone to frizzies. Certainly very short hair would be easier to style, but it's not the only option. </p> <p>That web site gives good tips about products and styling techniques. It makes the point that women look older and frumpier not because their hair is gray but because their hair is frizzy/dried out/lacking luster. Really made a lot of sense to me... just imagine these two women:</p> <p>1) One with a frizzy, short mop of gray hair that lacks shine;<br /> 2) The other with shiny, straight, frizz-free long gray hair. </p> <p>The first will be the "typical old lady" look... the second will be marvelous and stunning and make people do double-takes. That's the kind of gray I want to be someday. :-)</p> <p>However I do have to agree with Shana that it is probably inevitable in our society that gray hair will make people assume you are older than you really are. I thought a lot about this last night. I don't really mind people thinking I'm older than I am - that would be a *good* thing in my book, having spent most of my life with a baby face.</p> <p>But, DH is only 2 years older than me and since he went gray, I do get comments from people (very rude people, if you ask me) inquiring as to our age difference in a way that seems to suggest they are thinking he is much, much older than me. Yes, I've always looked younger than my age, but before going gray DH did too, so it's not just that. There is a part of me that is tempted to go gray sooner rather than later so we look more like we "match" if that makes sense! </p> <p>Meanwhile, my mother went gray very early on (30s) while my dad didn't get his first gray hair until his mid-50s. Even then, his grays were unnoticeable. It wasn't until he hit his 60s that he seemed to go stark white virtually overnight. So my parents went through a long period (20 years) where my mom, who is one year younger, looked older than my dad. I know it bothered her, but she was so tired of dying her hair, and my dad couldn't care less - he loves her no matter what. But now they look just right together and they are just so cute, with their matching white locks. :-)</p> <p>I actually do not mind all the maintenance and time spent caring for my highlights. That would not be the motivating factor for me, because I have this hunch that going gray would not necessarily reduce that time and $ all that substantially. Sure, I wouldn't have to pay for highlights but I'd still have to get my haircut rather frequently and pay for a good cut. And I'd still have to use quality shampoo, moisturizer, anti-frizz stuff - and a flat iron for sure. If going gray requires more make-up then there's that additional expense (I don't wear much now). Not to mention wardrobe updates because I imagine you need to wear different colors. </p> <p>Nah, for me, the motivating factor would be more about wanting to still look like a couple who is aging gracefully together. I guess if the going gray thing is all about authenticity, then that is how it translates for me: my marriage is very important and precious to me - more so than looking young or anything like that. Does that make sense? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61965 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 14:21:35 +0000 merry77 61965@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Shana, my gray hair is also a different texture than my brown hair, but it's more wiry and coarse instead of finer.</p> <p>To all of you concerned about long gray hair, on the Going Gray Looking Great site there are some pictures of fabulous long gray hair. I have for years gone long, short, long, short and everything in between with my hair, but have stayed short to medium for several years now because I have an insane amount of hair. Because of it's thickness, it just feels too heavy when it's long. But I'm actually only thinking of going short short for the transition.</p> <p>We'll see what happens. I have an appointment with a new hairstylist in one week, so hopefully I'll make progress in that area at least </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61964 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 14:14:18 +0000 shana 61964@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I agree that a stylish haircut is probably the most important aspect of keeping your look fresh &#38; modern and not looking "old." No matter what you do though, people will just assume you are older if you have gray hair - it's just the result of our society's standards on aging. Since nearly everyone colors, we're just not used to seeing women with their natural hair color. </p> <p>I'm only about 10-15% gray and I am already thinking about it, especially as the grays are now more and more visible. Since I have black hair, they really do stick out - plus the texture is so crazy - they are finer &#38; frizzier than my regular hair and are very resistant to blowing out/straightening. Like some of the others above, my concern is about having to go to a shorter haircut - I've always had longer hair and I like it on me. It seems almost every women over a certain age (maybe 40) seems to have short hair which I guess is what you need to do as your hair thins and grays. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61915 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 03:36:18 +0000 wilson 61915@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This is such a facinating topic! My 6 aunts have all transitioned in the past few years from dying their hair very dark brown to going all white. After watching them carefully (I too am white haired at 33 but dye it dark brown and plan to go white some day) here are a few things I would say make a difference between being an attractive gray or white haired woman and being dowdy:</p> <p>Eye color...my brown-eyed aunts seem to look more striking than the blue-eyed aunts</p> <p>Fitness level...a fitter (not necessarily skinnier) person seems to look better grey than a non-fit person</p> <p>Skin color...my olive skinned aunt definitely looks better wearing white hair than my ultra-pale blue eyed aunts</p> <p>Teeth color...teeth seem to look more yellow with colorless hair on all of them</p> <p>Eyebrow color...Darker eyebrows look better to me than lighter eyebrows on grey or white haired women</p> <p>A friend of mine in her late 30s let her longish hair go gray and she said she the most interesting part of it is being percieved by others to be older than she is. She has two small children and although she is strikingly beautiful with flawless skin she is mistaken frequently for being their grandmother. She is a freakishly centered person so it doesn't bother her but it is something to consider.</p> <p>Paige </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61909 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 02:41:46 +0000 medusa 61909@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Gray hair can be beautiful. Go for it! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61899 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 01:18:07 +0000 Kathleen 61899@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You should be proud of the changes your body goes through within your lifetime. I think that super short gray hair on women (age-appropriate) is beautiful. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61869 Tue, 21 Apr 2009 20:46:50 +0000 marianne 61869@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>That's something I've been thinking about lately. I am 35 and I've been getting a lot of new gray, and I am developing a gray streak over my forehead. My mom is in her late 50s and has been dyeing her hair for over 15 years, and she regrets it now. She hasn't stopped yet because she doesn't want to go through the pain of growing it out. </p> <p>I also had long hair all my life, and I realize that I'll probably have to cut it off when I get more gray, which makes me nervous - I have no idea what it would look like, and the prospect of styling terrifies me. Still right now I am leaning toward not coloring. I do hope it'll become more acceptable and widespread in our society in the near future. We are so conditioned to see gray hair as unattractive, but really, doesn't aged skin look odd next to rich hair color? I am also very low-maintenance (read: lazy) and can't even get myself to paint my toes. I can't even imagine going for in for coloring on a regular basis. Although I would probably have to have my hair cut more frequently with gray hair to avoid looking frumpy... hmm.</p> <p>Anyway, I vote yes and I think your plan (glasses, clothes, great haircut) sounds great. Good luck! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61818 Tue, 21 Apr 2009 16:38:16 +0000 ChristineB 61818@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Well, since you are about my age, my mom is a fair bit older, but tarzy might find this story interesting. A few years ago (when she was about 50) my mom went grey. She started by slowly cutting her hair shorter &#38; shorter, and choosing lighter &#38; lighter hair color (she was med brown originally). I personally think she looks much, much younger with her beautiful platinum short, sassy hair cut than when it was a little longer &#38; brown. Seriously.</p> <p>As for me, about 2.5 weeks ago I colored my hair to cover grey for the first time. I plan on doing it for a few years, but I'm not sure how long. I like my hair long, and that makes it hard to go grey.</p> <p>I flip flopped about dying my hair for MONTHS. My biggest concern is that society expects us to dye our hair when we start going grey. I don't think that's fair at all. I've seen women with long grey hair that look much older than they really are, and since I like longer hair (a couple of inches past my shoulders), that concerned me. I know that I shouldn't worry too much about what society thinks if I'm comfortable with me, but it's still hard.</p> <p>Anyway, good luck making your decision. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61817 Tue, 21 Apr 2009 16:29:51 +0000 Anonymous 61817@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think grey hair is so beautiful on the right person with the right coloring. Tarzy, you seem to me like a good candidate for it working. I think wearing a wig for a test drive, or at least trying one on in the store is a great idea.<br /> I also think the idea of pulling the hair through one of those streaking caps to dye it while it grows out is a fab idea.<br /> Grey hair is like very short hair in that it looks very good on some and very bad on others. I talked to a stylist about cutting my hair pixie short and she said that I would have to wear more makeup which I am not interested in doing. I don't think my features would look good with short hair even if I did wear more makeup. What I'm getting at is maybe we can find out what characteristics make having grey hair successful and then comparing ourselves to the list. I think the greys I've seen who are striking have higher color in the skin, a beautiful shade of silver hair (which I think can be helped with shampoo or high or low lights), a fairly young looking face. I also think makeup is helpful when someone has grey hair. I'd love to do it but I don't think I would pass the test. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61810 Tue, 21 Apr 2009 15:38:17 +0000 tarzy 61810@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Merry77 - I have been thinking about the exact same thing! I'm actually a bit obsessed with this thought at the moment! I'm 51, but still look fairly young. I also color at home (due to the cost of the salon). My hair grows very quickly, so I have to touch up my roots every two weeks at least. I'm so tired of it. I am probably at least 90% grey under the haircolor.</p> <p>I recently saw a woman with the most incredible grey hair - it was like spun silver. She had it quite short, and it was just stunning. But she was definitely in her late 50s, maybe early 60's, and looked it. She had a very wrinkled face, and a very red/rosy complexion. The pinkness in her face actually looked great with the grey hair, which sort of gave me hope, because I'm fair with a cool tone to my skin. But she definitely looked older than me. </p> <p>I absolutely worry that going grey/silver will age me. My entire fashion persona is tied into "dark hair, fair skin." I dress for that. I pick my clothes based on dark hair. That's how I see myself. I am very fearful of looking "old," even though my face is "young." But - there's a part of me that would like to be authentic. I like the idea of accepting who I am, where I am I life, and not trying to be something I'm not. But I also don't think there's anything wrong with doing things to make yourself more attractive. I am attracted to the idea of going natural - but the reality is quite another thing.</p> <p>If I do it, I will get a super short haircut. I HATE the way my hair looks when the grey is growing in gradually. It looks so mousy. I would rather chop it off and wear hats or headbands. It'll soon be hot anyway, so a short haircut would be good. I've talked to my stylish about it and she thinks I would look good with grey/silver hair. She thinks I have good coloring for it. But it's easy for her to say! It's easy for other people to say "go for it" - it's not their reflection staring back in the mirror! (Sometimes I wish there was a grey wig I could wear for a few days to get used to the idea.)</p> <p>This is definitely my next big decision. I'm so drawn to doing it, one the one hand. But I am also very fearful of looking older. I guess it's vain at my age to think that, but you get used to seeing yourself in the mirror looking a certain way. I don't know anyone who wants to look old! If I knew my hair would be that beautiful silver, I'd do it. But who knows what it will really look like. </p> <p>This is such a huge decision. I am so tired of the constant upkeep. But I'm just not sure I'm ready. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61809 Tue, 21 Apr 2009 15:36:23 +0000 merry77 61809@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Carissa - I read everything Teresa had about her transition, and that's how I found the Going Gray Looking Great site. I'm sure my very small local library doesn't have the book, but maybe I can get it on interlibrary loan. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61804 Tue, 21 Apr 2009 15:21:22 +0000 chewyspaghetti 61804@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Gray can be really beautiful! It sounds like you have a great plan on making it work for you. I plan on just letting it happen naturally. I do have a friend who is prematurely gray, but she does all the wrong things- dowdy clothes, bad haircut, etc. It does add age to her, but I think that her clothes do that as much as anything. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61803 Tue, 21 Apr 2009 15:19:24 +0000 carissa 61803@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Absolutely go for it! </p> <p>Don't worry about freckles and gray being weird, that's just our culture/society having colored our hair for so many decades now.</p> <p>I recently decided to stop coloring my hair as well, esp. after I checked out the Going Gray . . . book from the library.</p> <p><a href="http://www.wardrobe911.com" rel="nofollow">http://www.wardrobe911.com</a> is run by a stylist Teresa Morisco and she too has gone gray early. She has some good posts on the subject. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/going-gray-what-are-your-thoughts#post-61801 Tue, 21 Apr 2009 15:14:47 +0000 merry77 61801@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My skin tone actually concerns me a bit. I have very fair skin with pink undertones, but I have lots of freckles. Are freckles with gray hair weird? I'll have to pay attention to see if I find people with gray hair and freckles so I can visualize it for myself.</p> <p>And Joy, I will switch to semi-permanent haircolor immediately to help with the transition a bit. The rinses you mentioned don't really do anything for me since my grays are so coarse and stubborn.</p> <p>Shiny, I was already thinking about the purple shampoos. Thanks for the reminder. </p>