https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Fri, 17 Apr 2026 09:34:44 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth/page/2#post-2062480 Fri, 20 Sep 2019 10:49:02 +0000 unfrumped 2062480@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Risks are relative, as you say!<br /> Never had booties before YLF.<br /> Also had poison eye for cropped pants , but now totally “ need” them ( in some seasons) for my style. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth/page/2#post-2062381 Thu, 19 Sep 2019 21:47:31 +0000 The Cat 2062381@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>By the way, thank you, Carla, for the inspiration to continue to evolve our personal styles and try new things!</p> <p>The past couple of years, wide floral trousers, ankle length trousers, loafer sneakers, Birkenstock style sandals, a long pastel blazer and a long slim sleeveless pleather tunic have been among my successful new-to-me-items. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth/page/2#post-2062380 Thu, 19 Sep 2019 21:46:33 +0000 The Cat 2062380@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>If you feel comfortable with your style, if it's a natural reflection of your personality, and if you wear it with confidence, people will often respect you for it and enjoy it. That's my general experience. And it feels kind of liberating to have a personal style instead of dressing like anybody else. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth/page/2#post-2062379 Thu, 19 Sep 2019 21:41:54 +0000 The Cat 2062379@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Interesting reading, Carla and many commenters.</p> <p>As for myself, I actually don't feel I have taken any sartorial risks. I usually don't see view wardrobe items as risky, unless they are worn in a completely strange setting, like sporting a swimsuit as office wear or wearing stilettos in deep snow, which I have never felt the slightest temptation to do. :-)</p> <p>But I do know that up through the years, others have viewed some of my choices as rather courageous--like insisting on going grey when "all others" indulged in dying, or wearing midis when few others did so, or sporting bold, colourful glasses that noone around me dared to wear. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth/page/2#post-2062178 Thu, 19 Sep 2019 01:52:38 +0000 rachylou 2062178@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thought provoking. After joining YLF I did finally totally put down the Prep and am much happier sartorially for it. It wasn’t the criticism that worried me; I learned long ago chutzpah pretty much makes everything work. I guess it’s that my life is steeped in preppiness in every other way and I didn’t know if it would work... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2062129 Thu, 19 Sep 2019 00:01:46 +0000 Carla 2062129@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>How apropos is this.</p> <p><a href="https://unefemme.net/wearing-more-color-challenges.html" rel="nofollow">https://unefemme.net/wearing-m.....enges.html</a> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2062084 Wed, 18 Sep 2019 20:13:32 +0000 Gigi 2062084@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Your post was a pleasure to read, Carla! I too didn't have a leather jacket (well, still don't--only faux leather right now) or a jean jacket before joining YLF. I got my faux leather jacket and my jean jacket about a year ago. The jean jacket is more a practical purchase for me, but the faux leather one is just what the doctor ordered for my style, and I love it. I keep looking for a real leather jacket, but I am very small in the shoulders and short waisted, so I rarely find anything that fits.</p> <p>My biggest fashion risk after joining YLF was wearing leopard print. I had never worn anything eye-catching in my life before that. I had a therapy appointment one day and decided to wear my new animal-print booties. My therapist's eyes just about popped out of her head! She made me very self-conscious by the way she reacted. But the fashion-forward gal who worked at the front desk raved over the booties, which helped me feel a lot better. I decided I liked the booties and would continue to wear them, and it turned out that they garnered a lot of compliments over time and helped build my self-esteem. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061702 Tue, 17 Sep 2019 18:22:47 +0000 Anonymous 2061702@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'd have thought those 3 things were always part of your style too!<br /> I think I'm taking much fewer fashion risks now, since I tried so many things before and feel like "been there done that." Now I'm honing my style and less afraid to spend more on pieces. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061688 Tue, 17 Sep 2019 18:00:14 +0000 Barbara Diane 2061688@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Maybe a bit off topic but realizing that items can fall on either side of the border of my line between great and too much and I can’t always tell which side of the divide said item will land. </p> <p>One top became a much loved workhorse and a once worn tote sized purse now holds art supplies. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061338 Mon, 16 Sep 2019 12:25:24 +0000 nemosmom 2061338@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What a fun and fascinating read, Carla! I would have thought a denim jacket had been in your closet forever - it seems like such a signature piece for you </p> <p>I will have to ponder this one... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061284 Mon, 16 Sep 2019 02:24:29 +0000 DonnaF 2061284@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I started following YLF maybe eight years ago and joined over 7.5 years ago but took quite awhile to post photos as I didn't have a barely decent cell phone until a few (3?) years ago.</p> <p>This means I was pretty clueless as to what was on trend for maybe 58 years since I am 66 now. I just (rarely) went into bricks'n'mortar stores and figured if something were (still) sold it must be okay. So even considering what is on trend is a bit of a risk because my environment is decidedly not fashion or trend conscious. It helps that my mother passed away four years ago because she was always hypercritical of all aspects of me including my appearance, and now I feel freer. I also used to dress to be invisible because I didn't want to embarrass my daughter, but I think that piece was more about me than her.</p> <p>So now I feel free and worthy of being stylish. But now, umm, I feel the pressure of never going out without looking put-together because certain neighbors, folks from church, etc. seem always to check out what I'm wearing. Yikes!!!! OTOH, I think people need to know a woman can be 66 years old and not look like she has *given up*.</p> <p>As to fashion risks? Kick flares, especially under dresses. Most of mine are hacked baby bootcuts which never hang quite right on me. And pattern mixing. A little bit of color mixing, but I don't wear all that much color. But anyway, I wouldn't have done all those things without YLF since I don't see much of that on my streets or at Trader Joe's.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061172 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 19:37:39 +0000 bj1111 2061172@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What @kkards said—in addition to risks as an athlete and in moving, the risk of retiring to something is huge for me so I look to you as a role model who has successfully navigated this particular transition with verve and style.</p> <p>Perhaps those larger changes may have been informed or facilitated by taking (smaller) fashion risks </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061169 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 19:36:09 +0000 cindysmith 2061169@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I don't know if I take too many fashion risks. The riskiest I get is with my hair, I suppose. I'll grow it long for a while, then go crazy and have it all chopped off; but now that I own tape-in extensions, even an under shave isn't that risky anymore </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061160 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 19:13:27 +0000 smittie 2061160@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I don’t think very linearly, so telling the story of my journey is hard. Too hard for Sunday afternoon.</p> <p>But I will tell you about my risks, in no particular order:</p> <p>-wearing conspicuous colours and patterns. This was generally a failure but not completely. I like a conspicuous blue. I like a conspicuous column of colour but I have to be in the right mood. </p> <p>- wearing conspicuously trendy items. I have learns I’m totally ok with this. although I generally am never the “first in” on a trend, I’m close.</p> <p>- wearing clothes that my mother would approve of. (Yes, this is a risk because they’re veeeerrry Classic.) Really an utter failure, and I wish it weren’t so, as I love my mother’s style. She wears Breton tops and lovely quality sweaters, shoes, and handbags. She is polished even without makeup!</p> <p>I’ve tried to emulate her but I always end up feeling like an old lady. This is why I can’t get on board with Breton stripes! Even boat necks are iffy. </p> <p>- handbags. Partial success. I never really owned handbags before YLF. I’ve tried many types, and seem to like structured cross bodies the best.</p> <p>- tall boots. Success. This is a thing that I’ll be wearing forever I think.</p> <p>- jean jacket and leather jackets: success on both, but am thinking their success is related to my preference for classic pieces, rather than their wearability. (I have to be in the right mood to wear them.)</p> <p>-skirts in the winter: jury is still out. I’m thinking that skirts and tights are a touch too dressy and cold for our winters. Am looking to experiment now with jean skirts and leggings.</p> <p>As Janet mentioned, you have to try a lot of things to figure out what you like. </p> <p>As Cardiff girl mentioned, there is the whole “mother thing” that can colour your whole perception of what your style is. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061157 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 18:56:03 +0000 Angie 2061157@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What a joy to read, <b>Carla.</b>&nbsp;You made my heart happy today. THANK YOU. Can I clone you?&nbsp;</p> <p>I thoroughly enjoyed reading everyone else's comments too.&nbsp;</p> <p>*group hug*</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061134 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 18:06:11 +0000 Style Fan 2061134@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Carla, your fashion risks have served you well.&nbsp; I would have thought you were wearing similar pieces your whole life.&nbsp; You always ask the most interesting and thought-provoking questions.&nbsp; I love reading them.&nbsp; I do agree with kkards that you come across as adventuress person.&nbsp;&nbsp;I am also glad that kkards joined YLF.&nbsp; I enjoy your posts and WIWs.&nbsp;&nbsp;</p> <p>I have always loved fashion, clothes, design and colour.&nbsp; I am not sure that I have taken any risks but I do like to find pieces that are out of the mainstream (Trippin boots, Jesse Kamm pants - before they were known, Sarah Pacini).&nbsp; I would usually only put one of those pieces in an outfit.</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061092 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 16:51:01 +0000 Alicewonderland 2061092@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I love your second to last paragraph-about being worth it and deserving to be visible. This is so much why I enjoy fashion as well.</p> <p>For me the fashion risks were actually caring about fashion and posting on the board. I was also brought up to not care about these things, and I’m also a really introverted person. But one day at work, my friend casually noted, “you look like you don’t care at all about now you look.” Uh oh. It wasn’t malicious, just a curious observation of how I could be so free of such worries. After that I started with the “10 pieces every woman needs in their wardrobe” lists, which actually served me well since I had mostly nothing. Then I came here, where sometimes I’ll get convinced to try something new. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061074 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 16:04:17 +0000 Anonymous 2061074@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am so glad you joined, <b>KKards</b>. &nbsp;It has always been my pleasure to read your posts. &nbsp;Best wishes. &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061032 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 13:15:34 +0000 kkards 2061032@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>i wanted to come back and say that joining YLF has been the riskiest fashion related thing i've been in a long long time... i'm a horrible writter, (I'm&nbsp;dyslexic and writting has always been problematic, i think way faster than i type and even reading things back don't realize i've skipped whole words because my brain "fills" them in) so joining a community where all the communication was written was scary, and for me risky, would people think i was ignorant/not smart/not worth paying attention to. &nbsp;and when i joined i was just nearing 50 and in a style rut....but its been transformational, i think i've found my fashion groove again, and i just assume that people who are put off by my writting are free to just skip over anything i've written....</p> <p>(my biggest fashion leap has been embracing white jeans year round, once i got over my "its against the rules" thing, it was liberating and seemed to open up so many other fashion doors) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061028 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 13:12:20 +0000 Janet 2061028@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wow, Carla, what a great reflection on your evolution and growth. </p> <p>I found YLF and the world of style blogs almost nine years ago, coming out of a very difficult year following the loss of my mother. I’ve always been interested in style and clothing, but had sort of fallen into a self-employment rut: working from home in sweats and defaulting to a steady diet of basic bootcut jeans and tees. </p> <p>The interesting thing for me is that I went through a process of trying a bunch of stuff that was ultimately *not* me in order to come full circle to what feels authentic to me, but in a more mindful, deliberate way — not just a lazy default. Along the way, I discovered that I could wear skinny jeans (like Dreika, I avoided them because they went against the norms of flattery I had always followed for my wide hips and big thighs), long jackets, and chunkier, more substantial footwear. </p> <p>The other night I gave a talk to a group of photographers, and at the end summed up with advice to not take it too seriously and not be afraid to make mistakes. To try stepping out of the comfort zone and play and experiment — all of these choices are reversible if we decide they are not successful. But I do believe that many of us have to try a little bit of what we are *not* in order to discover or define what we are. Because sometimes what we are is a bit broader than we thought. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061017 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 12:47:36 +0000 Anonymous 2061017@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>So insightful, Runcarla, and I was surprised to hear that the leather jacket, etc., were risky items, because they all seem perfect for you. &nbsp;You were born for white jeans!</p> <p>I might be the opposite of you. &nbsp;I grew up in a very regimented environment (school uniforms, pressure to conform, and so forth), and as soon as I moved out I rebelled in all kinds of ways, including my wardrobe. &nbsp;There was nothing I didn't try out, and had a ball doing it. &nbsp;Since joining YLF, though, my risks are much more calculated, and I've been able to hone a personal style out of disparate elements. &nbsp;So a bit different from your style journey, but clearly YLF has made us both happier with our wardrobes! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061010 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 12:37:50 +0000 Helena 2061010@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Fabulous Carla; it's a joy to witness your fashion evolution, and I feel extremely blessed to have this community of women, some of whom are a step or two ahead of me on life's path, as a constant source of inspiration!</p> <p>I'll have to ponder your question - for me, it might be 'what risks aren't I taking, and how is that holding my growth up?' ... hmm, good mental fodder for my Sunday a.m. coffee ... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2061009 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 12:34:13 +0000 Dreika 2061009@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Incredible and thought provoking post, Carla. Completely agree that taking risks in how we dress could lead or signify a personal change and growth. And also sometimes seemingly small things mean quite a lot in terms of change. This is why I don’t think interest in fashion is a shallow thing. On the contrary - thinking that fashion is a shallow hobby is not a very thorough approach.<br /> I’ve ever had interest in fashion since young age - in 5th grade sewed my first dress. But I did notice a moment when my style shifted drastically and this coincided with a personal change for me. I even think that letting myself wear more “rebellious” clothes made me realise that I could be more free in other aspects of my life as well. And by “rebel” I don’t mean doing something dangerous or even noticeable for the others but rather just living and dressing how I want and not by other people opinions.<br /> This moment for me is marked with my first pair of skinny jeans (got them in 2012). For the first time in my life I felt confident to wear something form fitting on my bottom half and in the same time to wear something oversized on top. It was the total opposite of everything I’ve been thought about flattery and fashion silhouettes yet it felt right and I discovered my personal flattering priorities - waist surrendering, fluid on top, fitted/tailored on the bottom or fluid all over but keeping bottoms cropped. I’ve never felt dressed right before that moment but since then I’ve felt fab even in the simplest T-shirt and jeans outfit. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2060998 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 11:58:52 +0000 kkards 2060998@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>such an interesting read....1st becuase i had not realized that your first denim jacket was so recent, to me it seems so organic to what i think of as your style, that i just assumed it was always a part of it. and 2nd that you think of the additions of a leather jacket etc as risks, becuase i think of you as fearless, after all you're a&nbsp;triathlon athlete and traveler who picked up and moved cities....to me those are risky, and not the activities of someone with low tolerance for change....so interesting how we think of ourselves vs what others see.... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2060992 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 10:47:34 +0000 Synne 2060992@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>After joining YLF I also bought my first leather jacket, denim jacket, breton stripe tee and white jeans. As weird as it may sound, earlier I prided myself in NOT paying attention to trends. Now I cherry pick what trends suits me and my lifestyle. I also have a smaller wardrobe now, a more sensible budget, more fun shopping and clothes that actually gets worn. I also have far fewer "I have nothing to wear for activity or event X"-crisis. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2060983 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 09:57:33 +0000 Anonymous 2060983@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What a powerful and interesting post. &nbsp;I cannot be as specific as you, but I did learn I was worthy of the splurge when it came to buying bags and sweaters. &nbsp;This was a huge mental hurtle for me to overcome. &nbsp;I never looked back and I never regretted those decisions. &nbsp;</p> <p>In contrast, I did regret every time I bought something based on lemming behavior. &nbsp;I wasn't buying for myself and those decisions were nearly always wrong for me. &nbsp;Why would I want to dress like someone other than myself? &nbsp;If anything, I grew more quietly confident in my choices and&nbsp;learned to really like my own personal style statements. &nbsp;<i>Confidence.&nbsp;</i>That is what I learned. &nbsp;</p> <p>My wardrobe is smaller than when I first found YLF. &nbsp;It is coordinated and meets my every need (except wedding guest). &nbsp;I have made huge strides forward. &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2060954 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 07:32:52 +0000 Cardiff girl 2060954@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What a great thing to post,l ve never really thought about fashion in these terms before but here goes.<br /> Joining YLF and posting pictures of myself.I might seem confident but actually I hate having my photo taken it makes me feel really awkward.l was brought up in a family whose catch phrase was,nobody is interested in you and any thing that did draw attention was seen as showing off,the ultimate sin!Spending money on clothes was obviously a highly frivolous activity and not encouraged not that we had any money in the seventies to spend anyway !! so I totally empathise with you and Suz when you talk about feeling worthy to spend the money on yourselves..<br /> I also empathise with Bijou s comments on aging,my mother was a very attractive woman and did not see aging in positive terms rather something to be dreaded and dressing mutton as lamb was another cardinal sin in our house.She commented constantly on other people’s appearance and not always in an entirely positive way.l realise that this was to do with her own fears but I feel that it has made me very self conscious.<br /> So posting pictures,dyeing my hair purple and generally “showing off” have been my biggest fashion risks. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2060947 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 06:32:05 +0000 karen13 2060947@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Such a great topic and wonderful reads from everyone. I am so indebted to all of you for helping me push my comfort zone. My style has improved tremendously in the past 4 years, as I was stuck dressing a shape I no longer had, and had never really thought much about what worked and what didn't. I am much more confident about being able to dress appropriately for most occasions.&nbsp;</p> <p>Echoing Suz, posting photos was very hard. But so worthwhile. Thanks to YLF's warm, kind and spot-on guidance, I ahve worn dresses, tucked in a few tops, and started sporting cropped pants and high waisted pants. I even have bought some earth tone and lighter colors to mix into to my overly dark, cool toned wardrobe. And today I actually semi-tucked all day on errands and was OK. That sounds like a small thing, but I constantly try to semi-tuck, and then either fully tuck or untuck when I leave the house because it feels contrived for me, even though I like the look on others. And today I wore mustard wide crops and got an compliment from a stranger.</p> <p>Small risks, and still no jean or leather jackets in my closet, but maybe soon!&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2060943 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 06:01:30 +0000 Bijou 2060943@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Carla this was a great read and really insightful.</p> <p>I have always enjoyed fashion and been relatively adventurous in what I am prepared to try and also how I define my style. Spending money on quality items has never made me feel extravagant as pretty early on in my career I was told by a mentor to dress for the role I wanted and I found that being well dressed helped with my professional credibility. I did tend to buy items that had a point of difference (so not true classic suiting) because then it felt like me.</p> <p>Turning 40 made me feel concerned that I had to get more serious with my styling for fear of being labelled "mutton dressed up as lamb". The problem was, I felt quite drab in head to toe neutrals - I love grey, white, black and navy - but an entire wardrobe of these was not giving me joy. </p> <p>I am not a serious person and like colour and whimsical elements, so YLF and Angie's personal style which embraces colour really helped me navigate wearing colour and not feeling like I am trying to be anything other than myself.</p> <p>This getting older is a tough one and YLF (Angie and forum members) has just been so great at helping me enjoy trends in a way that works for me. I'm the boss here, and fashion is not going to boss me around!&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/fashion-risks-change-and-growth#post-2060940 Sun, 15 Sep 2019 04:47:47 +0000 Anonymous 2060940@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am a 73 year old who first tried leather jackets and jean jackets, even jeans, because of YLF and have enjoyed having them all. With Angie’s guidance I feel like I can still wear graphic tees and sneakers, I do not feel like the old woman that I am and can still have fun with fashion.<br /> I am wishing you the best in the coming years...lots of adventuress and the health and strength to enjoy them. </p>