https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Thu, 23 Apr 2026 20:52:12 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559988 Wed, 07 Mar 2012 13:13:44 +0000 ManidipaM 559988@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Meredith, yes, thank you for that caveat too! That's what I'm hoping to do with all this navel gazing (out loud!) --- figure out WHAT to replace and what to replace it WITH, *before* I actually throw out the old faithfuls that have run ragged. Yep, entirely in step with your strategy there.</p> <p>I also realized today that I need to double up for some things. Partly there are laundry issues --- I wear a lot of vegetable dyes, which are best worked in like colours, being less 'fast' and chemically more sensitive to reactions that synthetic dyes. Acid- and alkali-set dyes are best NOT washed together, for example. So I often need to dress by colour each week, or the laundry would never get done. It does mean more options are needed.</p> <p>The other, bigger issue seems to be that I'm an itinerant professional. I have a homebase in two very different cities; and then every month or two I'm travelling to entirely uncertain places. I need basics in BOTH wardrobes, and I also need either a duplicate travel capsule (expensive!) or one that can be easily carted on my back when I switch homebase. So <strong>Epiphany 9: I need to identify not just holes but also where to double up!</strong> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559982 Wed, 07 Mar 2012 13:01:53 +0000 Meredith1953 559982@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi ManidipaM<br /> I had another thought I wanted to add. Yes I am trying to get my stuff "mean and lean" but I am definitely still not even close to getting there. In addition to analyzing how much is actually NEEDED by function (dressy, work, casual etc) and seasonal concerns (warm vs cold- some of which is solved by layering, but not all) I also need to replace items because although worn frequently out of need they do NOT all make me feel fab. </p> <p> It's interesting, because the purge I am trying to do needs to also walk a delicate tightrope with the need to have some clothing to wear! Example, I have really only a few pair of work trousers (at last count 6 because I can't wear blue jeans to work although I can do colored denim so that is an option that fits both work, and play and maybe even smart dressy) however I really don't care at all for 5 out of the 6 existing pairs I own- which is pretty sad. I would like to have 5 pairs of work trousers in total so that means I need to replace 4 of the existing ones with more flattering and stylish pairs. So a goal for a few shopping expeditions would be to gradually acquire those 4 pairs of pants and toss the 5 I don't like. What I am saying is I don't necessarily purge them till I have REPLACED them with the needed items. Hope this makes sense! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559814 Wed, 07 Mar 2012 04:51:57 +0000 ManidipaM 559814@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ladies, I could hug each and every one of you today! :-D</p> <p>Meredith --- Oh, that is *such* a thought-provoking point about expectations for women to have more stuff! I recall my mother used to say that my father's biggest joy in having a daughter was that he could play real-life 'dress up' with his 'doll'! He certainly bought and sewed far more clothes than either my mum or I could ever need; but was far more restrained with his own wardrobe. And my husband certainly has far fewer clothes --- because he is focused on his 'style comfort zone' (certain looks he simply will not wear; he has one pair of dress pants; very few ethnic garments and only for special occasions). Why am I more protean in my style? Is it conditioning or innate? So hard to separate the strands... but I need to try to get to that 'lean and mean' place. Thank you! (And feel free to keep reminding me!)</p> <p>Kirti --- "...my closet is tiny. But on any given day, I don't have a lot of items in it that are orphans or make me feel not so fab!" This succinct statement is one of the best motivations ever! THANK you for putting it so memorably.</p> <p>Ornella --- you smart lady, you! Thank you for the link. About to take a fine-tooth comb to it. So helpful! Both for practical strategizing and for gaining hope and inspiration from your success.</p> <p>Fern --- we think alike! I actually worked out a year's worth of 33.3 on a spreadsheet last autumn, and stuck to my imposed restrictions very successfully this winter (apart from a work trip to an entirely different climate). That's why I sort of suspect the fear of dearth and future regret in case I 'over-purge' is not only moot but irrational. And I need to make this my motto for future purchases: "understand how a replacement IS an improvement." One sure-fire way to stop repeating mistakes!</p> <p>DonnaF, Claire, Sveta --- your insight astounds me! </p> <p>You're quite right, Donna: I haven't bought more than perhaps 5 tops and a pair of thong sandals in the last two years. Strangely, it's not that the wear and tear is spread out across my garments. I often default to the same handful to wear around the house. BUT I'm fairly careful with my clothes (childhood habits from a thrifty family, like Sveta mentions) and they simply keep better than most people's! It *does* feel wasteful, as Claire so astutely picks up on, to throw *functional* clothes away just because they aren't *flattering*. Like Sveta hints, my cultural baggage chimes in to remind me of people who'd (quite literally) kill for the luxury this represents. </p> <p>Sveta, I agree with you SO much here: "Even the thought that you can throw away something which can be worn was alien to me. It took me a lot of will to get over those feelings but as soon as did the first purge it felt so liberating that I wanted to do more." I'm so inspired at your achievement, because I know first-hand how hard this must be.</p> <p>I'm guilty of this: "I realized that I was forcing myself to wear some things to justify their presence and I did not feel great wearing them." Also of this: "Perhaps they represent some unfinished dreams or projects and letting them go feels like failure." </p> <p>Claire, I could kiss you for that last one! Yes, some of my things I have a Linus-like blankie hold on. Life's been full of changes these last few years, and there's more uncertainty in the offing. But I need to stop clutching at a dysfunctional wardrobe. Maybe, since I AM paranoid, I need to put away a few good quality, flattering things that aren't good lifestyle fits just now --- in case the old lifestyle rears up again --- but MUST let go of the iffy. <strong>And I need (dun-dun-dun! Epiphany 8 coming through!) to separate some elements of my travel wardrobe, which is almost a costume-like entity in contrast to my everyday things, from my regular clothes (bar layering things)!</strong></p> <p>Christie Anne --- so important to be able to really SEE all of the things we have, isn't it? In India, closets are not a feature of our homes, and with a lot of moving in recent years, I've actually been living out of boxes and drawers for 3 years. This is part of the problem, certainly. You have me beaten on the shoes, though! Which again, only goes to show that it CAN be done and I need to get my behind in gear to do it!</p> <p>THANK YOU ALL, LOVELY LADIES! I need to get snapping photos now. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559621 Wed, 07 Mar 2012 02:08:55 +0000 christieanne 559621@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You have done so well to figure it out thus far! I am very impressed with your realizations and also with the humor and grace you are demonstrating in sharing. </p> <p>I have been closet purging/examining since December.<br /> Here are the self imposed guidelines I have made for myself but you should think about your own guidelines: </p> <p>1) The closet clean out is not a one time deal. Since I don't have unlimited resources to start over (and no valid reason to do so) I will have to continue to be selective in purchasing and ruthless in eliminating.<br /> 2) My personal goal is to be able to see everything. That means no under bed/boxed up storage of anything Amended to allow a box of seasonal scarves and gloves and one that holds cocktail/small purses and a few sentimental keeps (Girl Scout hat and sash) but they are hat box size.<br /> 3) Try to keep only things that I can reasonably wear now/near future - no sizes that would be easily a year away from wearing. I figure that if my body changes that drastically, I will want new and figure it out then. </p> <p>Shoes was a big endeavor - I had at least 100 pairs! I did a quick toss of very outdated. Then separated like styles/colors together all over the floor - it looked like a shoe showroom. Since I was determined to keep only those that fit in my visible storage (back of door hanger and one closet hanger shelf thing, I went through a process of comparing next to each other and thinking about versatility, current fashion, usefulness, etc.<br /> I still have too many though. </p> <p>You can do this! It is easier to pick one category a week so you don't get overwhelmed. In the meantime, I like the Pinterest idea and then of course, the fantastic support system you have here while you take your journey </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559618 Wed, 07 Mar 2012 02:06:56 +0000 Sveta 559618@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Manidipa, you are hilarious! You should tie for the first place with Claire for the most funny YLF writer!:-)<br /> Claire just summed up perfectly what I wanted to say. When I joined YLF I purged at least 85% of my closet during the first 6 months - and boy, that felt so good! It was very hard to start: I came from a country where most of people were quite poor and hoarding stuff was a norm. Even the thought that you can throw away something which can be worn was alien to me. It took me a lot of will to get over those feelings but as soon as did the first purge it felt so liberating that I wanted to do more.<br /> I realized that I was forcing myself to wear some things to justify their presence and I did not feel great wearing them. Life is too short to waste it on something you don't love!<br /> I posted a lot of "keep or throw away" things here for a feedback and it helped tremendously. I weeded out a lot and began to fill the holes with careful consideration. Now I love my wardrobe and while I still make some shopping mistakes they are far and few between.<br /> Good luck and keep us posted on your progress! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559603 Wed, 07 Mar 2012 01:49:03 +0000 Anonymous 559603@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Dear Manidipa, you are making marvelous progress! I think true style begins in the head, and you are doing the work of figuring it all out. These epiphanies amount to huge strides forward, and I loved reading your post! Loved. Laughed at little too (*with* you not *at* you). I am all to familiar with the feeling of hyperventilation when something starts to feel out of control for me. I can also relate to the fear of scarcity if I should let something go unwisely. Having been raised by hardworking and thrifty parents it is hard to part with something that still has some use value.</p> <p>The only advantage I have on you is that I'm not emotional about stuff/clothing that I don't love, and I really enjoy a good clean-out. I finally convinced myself that if I donated something to Goodwill and then later needed the item, I would be able to go back and find nearly the same thing for very little money. I figured that if I give, Providence will see fit to provide for me in my time of need. However, you mentioned in a earlier post that you don't have charity shops where you live (for resale). So that changes things a little.</p> <p>Be that as it may, I would still encourage you to do a MAJOR purge. You have too many choices and it can be overwhelming. Plus if your closet is lean and mean, you can easily pinpoint a true hole and fill it with no guilt. I hope you won't be on SYC for the next 6 years; that seems a bit drastic. And you are WAY to tough on yourself. Getting rid of the clothing mistakes that stare you in the face everytime you go to your wardrobe is one of the kindest things you can do for yourself, and before long, you will forget you ever made them! I think you probably do need the shoes you posted about the other day, unless you already have the exact same thing and just can't find them. What good is it to have gobs of the wrong clothes when you probably are only wearing a few dozen go-to outfits anyway? Either you have some fab stuff hidden away and just need to get organized, or your things are out-of-date, not flattering, the wrong size, for the wrong lifestyle, for the wrong climate or for a past job, Perhaps they represent some unfinished dreams or projects and letting them go feels like failure. I gave away many sewing patterns and loads of fabric once I realized it was actually making me feel guilty for not being more industrious. Out of sight, out of mind. :)</p> <p>Okay, I'm stepping down off my soapbox. I hope we're still friends! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559492 Wed, 07 Mar 2012 00:08:33 +0000 DonnaF 559492@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Manidipa;<br /> How long ago did you acquire most of your clothes? I would hazard a guess that the bulk were not purchased within the last year or two, right? I am one of those people who have a hard time letting go. . .but not as bad as my mom who has clothing from every decade dating back to the 1950s and has five closets and a rack stuffed with clothing she doesn't wear and hasn't worn for decades but won't part with. Too bad she has always been bigger than my daughter and I so we can't even wear them for costume parties! I certainly don't want to be a hoarder like her.</p> <p>I am finding it helpful to circle back periodically and try on clothes with a real stink eye and figure out if they fit and why I don't wear them. I also told myself that I deserve to wear better than raggedly clothing even just around the house. I was shocked recently when I tried on a few things that I thought fit, only to discover they didn't. Better to figure that out now than on a day when I donned them and rushed out the door before checking the mirror! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559360 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 22:00:17 +0000 fern 559360@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Manidipa - Your post is awesome and so funny - haven't we all been there?<br /> My Complete Closet Spreadsheet (I will call it that from now on) was incredibly beneficial because I stopped buying duplicates - or, I had to understand how a replacement was an improvement.<br /> Purge anything that doesn't fit or you don't like, and then:<br /> Pick your favorite 33 item wardrobe. It's called Project 333 wardrobe, and those minimalists folks make do with 33 items (yes, including shoes and accessories) for 3 months. They say they forget about clothes by the end, dressing is so easy. Ahem. That's not what I want, but every time I sit down to list my 33 items, I learn something. I haven't bothered to *really* do the challenge, but I did move everything but the 33 to another room. If I want something from outside my 33, I have to go get it &amp; I'm forced to think about what it offers.<br /> Ornella talks about this in her post (link above), how limits give you focus.<br /> "lean and mean" - "style statement" - All are about limits providing focus. Hmmmm. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559316 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 20:57:56 +0000 Ornella 559316@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Mandipa, you are one fabulous creature and your writing has me glued to the monitor every! single! time! ;-)</p> <p>I hear you - oh so well! Been there, done that, perhaps the numbers were not quite the same, but the sense of loss certainly is. And not just me, so many of us.</p> <p>I've written a long post some time ago for this exact purpose - if I ever feel someone is going through what I went through wardrobe-wise, I can just point them in that direction. I hope it will make some sense and be of help to you. You can read it <strong><a href="http://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ot-silver-jubilee-of-weekly-themes-what-ive-learnt-so-far-long">here</a></strong>. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559259 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 20:36:42 +0000 Isabel 559259@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Great insights !! Isn't it amazing how we can have too much and still have nothing to wear ? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559251 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 20:32:12 +0000 Kirti 559251@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I love how Meredith has put it - 'I need to keep the number of items lean and mean!' I work with that philosophy too, that is why my closet is tiny. But on any given day, I don't have a lot of items in it that are orphans or make me feel not so fab! And that took months of culling, giving away impulsive and ill fitting purchases and best of all, getting a lot of helpful advice here on YLF. I don't even shop now unless it is YLF approved and actually fills a need in my closet </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559239 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 20:23:36 +0000 Meredith1953 559239@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>ManidipaM,<br /> Don't hang your head in shame! I sometimes think culturally women are kind of encouraged to have a lot of "stuff". Men have far fewer items and are willing to spend more for them and wear the heck out of them. No one says anything if they repeat themselves every week.</p> <p>I personally want to determine what is an appropriate number of each type of outfit to have (by that I mean by season and function, not by item type). This is going to take a hard look at my real not imagined lifestyle. </p> <p> Example. I get dressed to the 9's less than half a dozen times a year. A Christmas party, or the opera, or a special anniversary, never anything formal or black tie, soooo.... how many "fancy" oufits do I need? Not many. </p> <p>I go to work 5 days a week and get a couple of weeks off in the summer so having more work clothing that can work across seasons is probably the most important thing for me. Even then, do I really need more than 2 or 3 weeks of outfits? Not really. </p> <p>Play clothing is pretty much weekend and 2 weeks in the summer so again, how much play clothing do I need? </p> <p>What I'm trying to explain so poorly is that I need to keep the number of items lean and mean but try to up the style and quality quotient. </p> <p>Does this sort of make sense? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559215 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 20:08:42 +0000 Transcona Shannon 559215@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Ok...now that I've stopped laughing over your hilarious comments, I can weigh in a wee bit. First, I think you've done AMAZING over the short time you've been at YLF. These epiphanies are huge and are going to go a long way in getting you where you want to go. As Suz mentioned, once I got brave enough to start posting outfits (I was with YLF for 8 months before I got up the nerve), I did a methodical "keep or toss" exercise. I had already purged a ton of stuff I knew didn't work for me (didn't fit, wrong colour, doesn't go with anything, hideous pattern, what was I thinking...you get the point). But I still had some items that I was unsure about since I didn't yet trust my instincts (still don't quite often). These I would combine into an outfit and then post for the YLFers to determine if the item was useable or should be tossed. It was extremely helpful.</p> <p>Hang in there - you're doing great. We'll keep you from hitting the stores! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559210 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 20:05:09 +0000 Kirti 559210@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I love the idea of a pinterest board for you. With so many different styles here on YLF and all the blogs out there, it would really be helpful for you to narrow down what kind of styles suit you and what styles you like! </p> <p>Another purge is in order, I think. But only after you do a bit of self analysis? I mean, you should LOVE every item in there, otherwise it is just taking up space, right? Or so I think when I ruthlessly cull my closet and donate stuff every once in a while!</p> <p>I did a lot of browsing on three sites when I was started out on a style journey - YLF (of course!), Already Pretty and Inside Out Style. Sally of Already Pretty has a lot of posts I found very helpful (especially her Reader Request posts) and Inside Out style helped me figure out my body shape and the colours that suit my skintone!</p> <p>I hope these suggestions help! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559180 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 19:49:29 +0000 rae 559180@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Manidipa, you are brave to tally up all your items. Honestly, I'm a bit afraid to! I have had a large wardrobe for a long time, so I definitely share many of your feelings expressed here. </p> <p>Epiphany 5 hit home the most for me. This is where I finally started to feel a sense of control over the clothes, rather than feeling the clothes controlled me. Bless Una for coming up with UWP, because suddenly it became clear what I should keep and toss and buy. AND, I am very excited to see what you come up with for your style statement/goal!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559179 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 19:47:27 +0000 ManidipaM 559179@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Suz, Amy, Meredith, Sunita --- thank you so much for your support! And yes, PLEASE do holler if I sound even remotely like I'm heading towards retail therapy.</p> <p>Meredith, I hang my head in shame. This ginormous number is AFTER a closet purge last winter and a supposedly ruthless (ha. ha. ha.) pruning two years ago, when we moved across the country. :-/ Epiphany 7: Someone has no clue what a 'purge' should look like!</p> <p>Sunita, thanks for holding my hand over this. I DO need to get over feeling so incredibly wasteful (which feeling my spouse and parents magnify in THEIR horror that something is beyond 'rescue', making it harder)... and just DO it already! Now, with another move staring me in the face, is the perfect time.</p> <p>Suz, thanks for reminding that this is *supposed* to take time and not be an overnight success of an event. For some reason, I'd convinced myself that while building style is slow, letting go of old habits was easy. Obviously, silly idea, or no one would have any bad habits left :-/</p> <p>Amy, big thank you! I do edit every so often, but I have still ended up where I stand --- which means I am NOT doing it right. hadn't occurred to me to keep notes of why and wherefore; which means I am probably stumbling because of the same blind spots each time. That is SUCH a helpful idea!</p> <p>ETA: Natalie, Jayne --- missed you ladies last time!</p> <p>Natalie, THANK YOU again, this time for this last link which proves it CAN get better from here. I need to learn from you, so much... </p> <p>Jayne, yes, I see what you're saying about moving past the emotional roadblocks. That's a particularly hard task for me, as I do get awfully sentimental about my possessions, and feel a sense of betrayal about saying sayonara to a gift or handmade treasure, even if it NEVER fit my shape or style. Thank you for reminding me that I HAVE to deal with this, or I'll never get started! Especially as I have 2.5 and NOT 4 seasons to dress for currently (the other 1.5 seasons are supposed to be accounted for by the rest of my wardrobe in another city, and I'm SURE I've forgotten what it actually contains) :-/</p> <p>Now I need to re-assess my list and identify my piles, then figure out that dreaded pile#2, a la the stylish Shannon ---&gt; K/R! (I need to also be brave and post those WIWs) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559157 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 19:36:50 +0000 jayne 559157@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Mandi,</p> <p>I actually don't have a problem with the numbers...they can be even higher if you really have 4 seasons to dress for and need to change as you go.</p> <p>But, since you admit to the holding on for sentimental reasons....don't start making outfits before you do at least one purge. Angie has a nice blog about closets and clearing out where you put piles of 1. love, 2. maybe. if 3. no way and then give yourself permission to get rid of 3 and work on pile 2 a bit. 1. is a no brainer so keep them but the 2 pile is the challenge. Shannon has a great method of trying to post one from pile 2 and deciding finally whether to keep or give away. I did that myself and it gets easier and easier over time to make the decision. I found certain things I thought I 'should' keep or wear made me feel a little tiny bit of dread at wearing them. I have learned to listen to that feeling and it helps later when you are shopping. This is the start of your journey! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559154 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 19:35:36 +0000 goldenpig 559154@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Awesome, Manidipa, awesome! I love your post and your detailed analysis. You are hilarious! I am in the same boat. I think I counted up my wardrobe items in my closet and I'm over 300. And I've slowed down with my shopping but that still hasn't stopped me from picking up new items! I have to remind myself that I have so many fab things already and that if I buy something new, it will prevent me from wearing my other items more, so it really has to be super duper fab. And I've gotten much stricter with purging--I did a couple of huge purges and even if something fits, if I didn't feel fab in it I let it go. Of course there's always a few senitmental favorites that I have a hard time letting go, but on the whole I'm doing a pretty good job. Even then my closets are stuffed so I certainly sympathize! Good luck with your purge and remember to set the bar high and that will help you filter! It is so nice to have a closet where you walk in and everything makes you feel fab!<br /> Here's my closet purge/reorganization thread where I counted everything:<br /> <a href="http://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/closet-nirvana-complete-wardrobe-inventory-and-organization-pics" rel="nofollow">http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....ation-pics</a> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559136 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 19:25:22 +0000 Sunita 559136@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Your post made me giggle!</p> <p>I suspect you have tons of compamy in your situation. I could easily rival your number for shoes/boots and jackets/sweaters, but not for the rest. BUT, big but, I also did a couple of major cleanouts of my closet recently. Sounds like you might need to do the same. Toss or give away anything that doesn't fit or you just don't wear (for whatever reason). Keep a couple items for sentimental reasons if you like.</p> <p>It might feel awful while you're doing it (I recall thinking how incredible wasteful I had been), but it's tremendously liberating in the long run. Plus, now that my closet is semi-organized, I am a much more disciplined shopper. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559121 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 19:12:57 +0000 Meredith1953 559121@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>ManidipaM,<br /> First of all "you are not alone!" I know I have closet orphans and things that I don't love, don't fit my current lifestyle, don't fit....you get the idea. Now that being said, I don't have them on epic scale like you. I am in awe. We can all help rein you in if you sound like you are about to break your self imposed moratorium on clothing buying. Pinterest AND photographing are both fab ideas. You made my day! You have such a brilliant way of conveying your consternation. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559120 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 19:12:13 +0000 Amy 559120@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>The most helpful thing I've done recently is to purge my closet of "so-so" items and only keep the things I really liked. As I did that, I kept a running list of why I tossed certain things: fit problems, fabric problems, style problems, etc. That process helped me articulate what I didn't like, which has proved a valuable tool when shopping recently. I'm far less likely to add more problem items to my wardrobe now.</p> <p>I would do that before I tried anything else. You'll gain some clarity and some closet space. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559118 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 19:10:38 +0000 Suz 559118@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, Manidipa! You are both hilarious and brilliant. </p> <p>Not to mention lovely and beautiful, but we all knew that already! </p> <p>Believe me, you are NOT alone. YLF is packed with women who have been in exactly your situation and that is why they are here! </p> <p>I would say your first step is to prune. First, try it all on. If it doesn't fit or is outdated and doesn't make your heart sing—OUT. It. Goes. </p> <p>Then, once you've done that, you can start testing outfits here. Shannon did this over the past winter and it was really helpful to her; I'm sure she'll say more. </p> <p>Meanwhile, you can start the Pinterest thing and also perhaps read some of Angie's blog posts about developing a personal style or identifying one's style. </p> <p>This is a process and it is going to take a while. Whether we start with an EMPTY closet (as I did, following weight loss) or an overfull one, we are all on this journey together. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/epiphany-somebody-stop-me-and-thank-you-natalie#post-559115 Tue, 06 Mar 2012 19:03:00 +0000 ManidipaM 559115@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>GP (Natalie) started two threads recently that got me finally moving out of procrastination mode: <a href="http://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/whats-on-your-wardrobe-to-do-list-lets-get-cracking" rel="nofollow">http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....t-cracking</a> and <a href="http://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/just-for-fun--complete-these-three-sentences-about-your-wardrobe" rel="nofollow">http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....r-wardrobe</a></p> <p><strong>Epiphany 1: I have nothing to wear... because I have too many orphans!</strong></p> <p>Seeing as I have a trip in the offing and had to root through my closet anyway, I decided I may as well get started on My Complete Closet Spreadsheet, to help plan for my impending cross-country move.</p> <p>I spent all day; I'm still not done (it's nearly midnight); and already the tally has me shocked witless!</p> <p><strong>Epiphany 2: I have too many clothes! (period)</strong></p> <p>Some of you will remember I had been asking about shoes and talking of buying bags recently. Well, throttle me or shout me down next time I do that, would you please?</p> <p>At last count (and this is just what I could remember, including the other half of my closet in another city), I have 30! pairs! of! shoes! </p> <p>Okay, let's say half of these are 'mistakes' or 'outgrown' because my lifestyle has changed unexpectedly --- but I surely *cannot* actually NEED more shoes?! No, I don't have business-formal black shoes, and no, I don't have nude heels to elongate my legs. But really...? 30?! Can't I just make do with what I've got?</p> <p>I won't bore you with the rest of the hyperventilating I indulged in this afternoon, halfway through this exercise. I think the numbers speak for themselves (and I'm not even done counting). What they say loud and clear is that I NEED TO BE STRAITJACKETED INTO SYC MODE FOR A TERM OF SIX YEARS AT LEAST!!!</p> <p>::deep breaths!:: Here comes the confession:<br /> *Tops (including knits, T-shirts, and Indian ethnic garments) ---&gt; More than 93<br /> *Bottoms (pants, skirts, Indian ethnic garments) ---&gt; over 70<br /> *Dresses ---&gt;Baker's dozen, maybe more...<br /> *Sarees---&gt;Two score and more, perhaps three!<br /> *Sleepwear --&gt; at least 15 sets/outfits<br /> *Scarves &amp; stoles ---&gt;30-odd?<br /> *Sweaters, coats, jackets &amp; shawls ---&gt;Maybe 35?</p> <p>Now, it's possible I should let go of more than two-thirds of this lot for reasons of fit or frump, but am hanging on out of sentimentality... or because of some stupid fear of running out of options and not being able to find or afford replacements. </p> <p>BUT EVEN THEN, a third of this is still an outrageously unwieldy number! Wouldn't you agree? (I won't be so crass as to ask a lady about her personal numbers; but hands up, please, all those who think this is MORE than enough, or should be!)</p> <p><strong>Epiphany 3: I'm clearly a terrible shopper with no sense of personal style, else with this many clothes, looking decently put-together should be a breeze!</strong></p> <p>I'm putting this out here, posted up in public, to hold myself accountable. STICK. TO. SYC! at least until I whittle down the wardrobe to manageable proportions.</p> <p>Yes, I need a cardigan or two --- but only for next winter! Yes, a cami or three will sort out a couple more orphans apiece. But...</p> <p><strong>Epiphany 4: I have enough orphans to remix, repair and pair up BEFORE I even consider shopping</strong></p> <p>And the corollary to #3 and #4 is...</p> <p><strong>Epiphany 5: I *need* to urgently narrow down my style goals and perspective in order to dig myself out of this mess and not make things worse</strong></p> <p>I'm wondering if putting together every random outfit combo I can think of and photographing for assessment is the way forward... or is it too confusing and overwhelming? Should I just start with a Pinterest board to identify what I like... or would that be impractical because I clearly *don't* know whether what I like will work for my shape, style and lifestyle? </p> <p>What *would* you do, if you were mad enough to find yourself in my closet crisis? (Pretend you fell down the rabbit hole --- that might help. I seriously cannot imagine how anyone sane or sensible can get to this place. Me? I must be barking, or in possession of Mad Hatter crossed with March Hare genes!) </p>