https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Tue, 05 May 2026 09:35:06 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-198049 Tue, 10 Aug 2010 12:50:30 +0000 firefly 198049@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I have complimented strangers occasionally in the past, but since finding YLF I notice people's outfits more, and feel more ready to offer a compliment if I notice a great outfit or item. </p> <p>I've done the self-deprecating thing on being complimented too, but am working on trying to be more gracious with a simple "thank you". </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197952 Tue, 10 Aug 2010 05:06:16 +0000 Frances 197952@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Reneeb, when I was younger, I never thought about how my self-deprecation in response to a compliment impacted the giver of that compliment. Then I read somewhere that when you respond in a self-deprecating manner, it's tantamount to rejecting the compliment giver. And that's so true. Now that I'm older, it seems so obvious, but when I was young, cynical and entirely self-focused, it never even occurred to me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197949 Tue, 10 Aug 2010 04:57:42 +0000 Reneeb 197949@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>All the time I never met a stranger. But when I receive a compliment I always say something like thank you but i am so big or it would look better if I could walk straight etc.. A lady told me the other day to just say thank you. I did not realize that I responded like that. So I am going to try to just say thank you. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197936 Tue, 10 Aug 2010 04:26:27 +0000 Frances 197936@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, wow--I'm just circling back to this post and reading all the responses. How interesting that most of us can sometimes work up the nerve to compliment a total stranger, but become flummoxed, suspicious or embarrassed when the compliment is paid to us! I think I still harbor some youthful suspicions about compliments because I grew up in a family where the occasional compliment was usually followed by an immediate put-down. And even as an adult, I've been burned many times when giving out a compliment. Just a couple weeks ago, I complimented an imperious colleague on her shoes as we walked into a meeting. I couldn't help it--I just blurted it out because the shoes were beautiful, and I got an icy, curt and less than sincere "thank you" in response as she haughtily sailed off with her nose in the air. She didn't even look at me. </p> <p>But at the end of the day, I do believe that a compliment is a gift, as Kristen put it, and as adults, we shouldn't allow past negative experiences to inhibit us. We don't snub people who give us birthday or holiday gifts, and to behave with anything less than gratitude is just plain bad manners. We SHOULD give out compliments where they are due and brighten people's days, and we should learn to humbly accept compliments in turn with a simple sincere "Thank you!" at the very least. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197324 Mon, 09 Aug 2010 08:21:22 +0000 Lynne 197324@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Absolutely! It's nice to give feedback where it's due. Khris, you were right to get out of there....sounds a bit creepy. One of the nicest compliments I ever recieved was from someone who distinguished me from my (very attractive) colleague by describing me as "the attractive one" .....that was years ago and it still makes me sit up and smile. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197302 Mon, 09 Aug 2010 06:08:48 +0000 Katiepea 197302@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>If I see someone wearing something I adore and there is enough of a moment where our paths cross each other (ie, in a lift or in a supermarket queue), I love to give a short, sweet and sincere compliment to a stranger. Why not take the opportunity to give out a little bit of sunshine and possibly brighten their day, I say! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197280 Mon, 09 Aug 2010 04:42:40 +0000 Goldie 197280@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I used to never get complements on what I was wearing, so I never gave them, since it just seemed like a weird thing to do. I tend to love it when someone complements me, though, and I started giving complements as well. </p> <p>I only occasionally have the nerve to say anything to total strangers, but I've started making more comments to friends and acquaintances, with great results. At each of the last two weddings I've been to I've commented on the dresses that acquaintances were wearing, and was immediately taken into a conversation about where they got the dresses, how long ago, how much they love them, etc.</p> <p>The only uncomfortable part of the whole complementing business for me is that sometimes when someone complements me, I feel like I have to say something nice about what they're wearing in return, and that often feels fake (like I didn't think to comment about it until they complemented me). I guess I should just be better about saying thanks without feeling that pressure! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197269 Mon, 09 Aug 2010 04:17:52 +0000 Vix 197269@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This is a fun thread to read; I'm taking mental notes for the future!</p> <p>I have to psych myself up to give a compliment to a total stranger but I have and will continue to do it. </p> <p>I've also gotten better at responding to style-related compliments (they rarely came in the past, so I do appreciate them now!). I find a good default is, "Thanks, it's a favorite of mine/I love it too." Unoriginal on my part, but acknowledges the person's effort. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197194 Mon, 09 Aug 2010 02:28:44 +0000 halfpass 197194@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I do compliment others if I see something really fab. Sometimes I have a feeling of sisterhood with women I see who are well groomed and fashionably dressed. I have wondered of others feel that too.<br /> OTOH, I don't particularly like compliments on my outfits from people I work with regularly. I have a large wardrobe and do spend a lot of time pulling outfits together and I don't really like people to know or acknowledge how obsessed I am. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197163 Mon, 09 Aug 2010 02:03:28 +0000 Lisa 197163@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am starting to compliment more often. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197061 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 23:10:11 +0000 medusa 197061@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I do this sometimes; other times I'd like to but I'm too shy. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197038 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 22:07:57 +0000 Steph 197038@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I do compliment strangers--never on their style generally, but on specific items of clothing they are wearing. People are always really receptive, regardless of age. </p> <p>I also receive compliments from strangers and it totally makes my day. I think I am good about receiving the compliments and am always willing to give information about the items of clothing.<br /> (Sometimes I fear I give them more info than they really want: for example, they may ask where I got it and I will tell them, then also tell them the designer, how long ago I got it, and if it is out-of-season, where they might look to find it now. I can get overenthusiastic!) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197006 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 21:24:34 +0000 Debora 197006@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Cute story, MorethanBeige! I often will compliment the grocery store checkout girls on their manicures. I know that has to be a tough job dealing with the public and hope that it gives them a little lift. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-197000 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 21:19:46 +0000 morethanbeige 197000@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes I do! And as others have mentioned, the older I get the more I do it. I think it's because I feel less self-conscious about myself and more comfortable with others. I also love getting complimented. One time the check-out lady at the grocery store complimented my shoes (wedge sandals with straps.) She asked me what they were, I couldn't remember, so I took them off in line so I could tell her. Then it took some time to get them back on. OK, maybe too much! At least I'm sure the others in line behind me thought so! haha </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style/page/2#post-196970 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 20:52:54 +0000 Debora 196970@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes! I do try to give sincere compliments. I know it makes my day when I receive one. I've also noticed that giving compliments have the added benefit of making me feel good. Something so simple can be so powerful, especially in today's world where face to face human contact is often limited due to technology. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196961 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 20:37:57 +0000 tarzy 196961@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes. And the older I get, the easier it is to do so. I don't often compliment younger women (late teens, early 20's) because they seem to get so embarrassed and look at me like I'm a total weirdo, but I'll ALWAYS compliment a woman my age who's rocking a great look.</p> <p>Sometimes it's a quick hit and run "Great top!" Sometimes I'll ask if they remember the brand (they never do. Drives me crazy! Maybe it's because we debate everything so much here on the forum, but I know the exact brand, size, store, price, date and time I purchased it, and other color options of everything I wear, LOL.) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196942 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 20:06:19 +0000 Inge 196942@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You know, this was one of the things that really surprised me when I started reading YLF: how many times you lasses seem to get stopped in the street by strangers to talk about what you are wearing/receiving compliments about your outfits.<br /> That just doesn't happen in Europe. </p> <p>But the penny dropped (as in "oh one can actually do that!"), and I started trying it myself, feels wonderful. And the reactions are amazing. I've yet to meet someone who didn't walk away smiling. I was even brave enough to ask a lady which perfume she was wearing in a dressing room a while ago. Would never ever have occurred to me before YLF:-)</p> <p>And I really don't mind getting compliments myself (from friends or strangers, it's rare here, so I appreciate them extra). I'm also still learning to smile and say thank you, like MNSara. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196935 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 19:55:44 +0000 shana 196935@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes, I try to make a point of it because it really can brighten someone's day. I am working on accepting compliments in a more gracious way since I have a tendency to be dismissive. Kristen, I like how you have put it - I would hate to stomp all over a gift that someone gave me. I'll have to keep that in mind! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196892 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 17:37:10 +0000 judy 196892@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I DO! But I don't give a compliment for every great thing I see. If I did, I'd just be doing it constantly. But often "nice boots" or "great jacket" has to come out! Usually followed by "It looks great on you!" because it really does. </p> <p>The reaction is interesting. Some people seem genuinely flattered. Others act like you are just bothering them and please don't talk to me. Now that I think about it, it's usually the young women (20s) who act like they could give a **** what I think, and I wonder sometimes is it ageism? Perhaps they consider me too old to value my opinion? Or worse, if this "old lady" likes what I'm wearing, how cool can it be? But I can't help myself! And it is only happens occasionally. But the women my age and older are often the most grateful and even strike up a conversation. </p> <p>I hope I am good at receiving them, and I say thank you. Because I am truly grateful and I do like it. I also don't mind at all if they want to know who makes the boots, say, or where to get them. Do you? </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196890 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 17:34:33 +0000 Kate 196890@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I try to, though I could be better at it. What I'm awful at is asking where a stranger bought something (or what brand it is). It feels like it's one thing to compliment them out of the blue, it's another to demand information (even if I love the item and really want it). </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196881 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 16:56:29 +0000 MNsara 196881@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It seems easier as I get older to give out compliments to strangers. Maybe I am entering the kindly, grandmotherly stage of life? I am most inclined to compliment some item(s) that are particularly fab on the stranger.</p> <p>For receiving stranger compliments, I have finally trained myself to smile, say 'thank you', and NOT say anything self-deprecating </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196874 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 16:29:53 +0000 bella 196874@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes, yes! I think it is good karma. I get complimented on my outfits (especially my necklaces) pretty often so I return the positive thought back to the universe. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196871 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 16:25:51 +0000 bj1111 196871@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>all the time. like angie, i make a point to compliment older men and women. </p> <p>i usually comment on a specific item or "look" rather than a general "you look great". </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196864 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 16:06:49 +0000 Melissa 196864@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh, boy. Frances, maybe you and I can be neurosis twins. This topic made me really think about complimenting and receiving compliments from strangers and acquaintances. I'm going to need my tea to work this out.</p> <p>Ok, I have my tea (earl grey today because comments on the perfume thread made me think of it), but things are no clearer. It turns out that I have complicated feelings about compliments, mostly because I am a suspicious person and often find that compliments veer into other, more fraught arenas, like hidden agendas and gender issues. These issues may merit a post of their own, but are way too much to get into here.</p> <p>That said, I do often enjoy giving and receiving compliments. But, I think that some more extroverted people are naturally more graceful about compliments, and that for those of us who tend more toward the introverted and/or socially awkward, you have to pick your moments. For me, I do like to compliment strangers, but I only do it when I genuinely admire the thing I'm complimenting and when I feel that all the factors are right. My hangup about trying to "read" situations for appropriateness before issuing compliments may be over the top, but it's a pretty deep-seated personality trait. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196863 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 16:06:21 +0000 Alecia 196863@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I like to compliment people, too. It really does seem to make people smile and have a bit more spring in their step. I enjoy receiving compliments myself. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196858 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 16:00:50 +0000 Mamapicklejuice 196858@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>All. The. Time. I have actually run after people. It's a bit selfish on my part because it gives me such a boost to see someone's eyes light up from a compliment. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196857 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 16:00:49 +0000 Maya 196857@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Rarely. But one time I could not resist complimenting a girl who looked around my age (at the time I was maybe 20) on her coat. I was looking for a new winter coat and fell in love with hers. I told her it was fabulous and asked her where she got it. And that is the story of how I discovered Anthropologie. Unfortunately I did not get the coat because a) it was $$$ and b) it was way too long and had detailing at the hem that prevented it from being shortened. But still. Makes me wonder what else I might discover if I were less shy! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196854 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 15:57:35 +0000 marianna 196854@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sometimes! I am quite shy and it's hard for me to speak to strangers, but occasionally I will compliment someone's style. I feel great doing so, and I love making the person smile! Other times I just internally ooh and aah at the person's style, but don't have the hutzpah to compliment them.</p> <p>I like receiving compliments from strangers (who doesn't!) It always adds a little spring to my step. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196851 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 15:54:39 +0000 Sparky 196851@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm with BethW. The older I get, the more easily I can talk to perfect strangers, including giving compliments. I love receiving them too. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/do-you-compliment-strangers-on-their-style#post-196834 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 15:28:45 +0000 Angie 196834@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>100%. It happens daily, many times a day. It's like an energy inside of me that requires releasing before I pop. </p> <p>I often compliment people on a certain item or part of of their style too. And if the man or women are over 50 and they look incredible, I RUN to give them a compliment. </p>