YouLookFab Forum » Topic: Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?

YouLookFab Forum » Topic: Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it? https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Wed, 15 Apr 2026 01:39:36 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php Barbara Diane on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it/page/2#post-2094304 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 20:43:13 +0000 Barbara Diane 2094304@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Things I knew immediately, that it was love at first sight? A handful or two. Not this year, but my life. I put them on, or saw them, and I KNEW! So, most of my purchases I purchase or keep because they work for me. They fit well enough. They look good enough. They are comfortable enough. The color doesn't wash me out. They feel like me. And without these, I would literally be naked. Often enough, items I am unsure of become workhorses; well loved often worn items in my wardrobe. Sometimes they are wildcards. Then it's fun to figure out why they work so well. The hard ones are the ones that are almost perfect but I know what the problem is. I have one I am still pondering. It is very comfortable, fits well, works in my wardrobe, is flattering. But I question that for an item that is comfy it has bracelet sleeves when I want the warmth all the way down my arm. And it is black and gray and I don't seem to be wearing those colors this winter. But I have a hunch that will change and it would be a workhorse next winter. Last years mistake- a red scarf that's just a bit too bright and maybe cool a red. A possible mistake-hard to tell as it's more of a warm spring/summer top so I haven't played with it enough yet-a leopard print popover lightweight polished cotton top. I've been looking for a few years for more of that style and weight and for an animal print but the base of the print is a bit beige for me. Lesley on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it/page/2#post-2094243 Tue, 21 Jan 2020 18:24:06 +0000 Lesley 2094243@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I love reading all these responses! I love my wardrobe and own very few things that I don't wear, so I was hoping I could contribute to the "confident answer" pool, but I am definitely more hazy about it. When I find a wild card, RunCarla is right--the heavens open up and the angels sing. But sometimes when I am buying something that I need it is more of a quiet "like" than a "fall in love" and even sometimes I wonder if I won't end up wearing it because I'm not mad about it like my more flashy and unexpected purchases. And sometimes the things I only like end up being things that become workhorses. I bought a black cashmere turtleneck this year and it wasn't cheap (see: cashmere) and I wasn't madly in love at first try-on (boring! a black turtleneck!). But I loved how it felt, it fit perfectly, and I could imagine the outfits I'd be making. I have loved it more than I imagined. And I, too, have had that experience of a dainty floral looking excellent at the store that comes home and suddenly looks like a hospital gown. If I have *any* nagging doubt it goes back before the tags come off. (Someone wise, perhaps Angie? said once that you like an item the most the day you bring it home, so if there's any doubts return it to look for other fish in the sea.) I'm happy to report it rarely happens, but it happens. I know on some level this seems to contradict my above feeling about not being totally in love at first wear (see, complicated!) but it's more like a little voice deep down thinks something's going to bother me about it as opposed to trying something on and thinking, "It's not my favorite thing, but it's kinda perfect anyway." Jenni NZ on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2094009 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 18:53:54 +0000 Jenni NZ 2094009@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ It’s a pain to have to go twice, but the reason I have been doing it is because I have too large a wardrobe and I want to wear it all. And doh!- if I buy something new I won’t wear something older as much. So it needs to jump a high hurdle to be allowed in. The olive boots I would like are not yet turning up as they can’t be just any old olive boots. UmmLila (Lisa) on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2094007 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 18:45:19 +0000 UmmLila (Lisa) 2094007@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ My most hated shopping experience is when I find something I really like and wear, and then other things similar to it keep popping up, and they are somehow a tiny bit better. This happens to me often if I am shopping for a coming season and have something in mind, I find it and then more pieces come available further into the season. Jenni NZ on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2094006 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 18:44:46 +0000 Jenni NZ 2094006@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I am with you and Liesbeth. And also with Janet. The best items I walk away. This is usually in fairly local B and M stores. If it plays on my mind, I go back. If it’s gone, it wasn’t meant for me. Even then mistakes can be made, but successes are increasing thanks to both tracking and to all of you at YLF. I have seldom regretted leaving something in the store. April on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093976 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 16:28:59 +0000 April 2093976@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You and me both, Liesbeth.  Liesbeth on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093975 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 16:24:33 +0000 Liesbeth 2093975@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Here to say many of these tips are great - but you will still make mistakes. I have left stuff at the store and regretted it after it sold out (though not very often) and I have had things that 'clicked' turn out less comfortable or practical than I thought and become benchwarmers... I do hope with practice and sel-reflection (and the help of you guys!) to get better at this though! Angie on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093966 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 16:05:06 +0000 Angie 2093966@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Sweet April, I wish I could be succinct and helpful about my answer. But once the item has followed me home - which is in itself a great hurdle to cross! - I rely heavily on my emotions - (must have high happiness factor) - to tell me yay or nay after assessing the usual: <ul> <li>fit, comfort, flattery, practicality, fuss-factor, modesy-factor</li> <li>remix ability (I am big on remixing old with new) </li> <li>does it reflect my chosen style adjectives and style moniker </li> </ul> When I am unsure, I ask Greg and Sam April on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093947 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 14:05:08 +0000 April 2093947@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Your #1 is the way I approach antiques, Janet.  If it's still in my head a couple of days later, it usually comes home with me.  Very smart to do this with clothing as well. Janet on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093945 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 14:00:15 +0000 Janet 2093945@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ A little bit of what a lot of former posts have said! Two tests: 1) I walk away and leave the item behind. Particularly if it’s pricey. If it sticks in my head for hours or even days, I go back. If it’s there I try it again and if it’s still everything I thought, it goes home with me. If it’s gone it wasn’t meant to be. I’ve had occasional regrets for things that sold out but not many. 2) I get the item and take it home. It’s perhaps a little outside of my comfort zone or a little different for me. But the return policy is friendly. If I can make multiple outfits with it and want to wear it right away, or within the first week or so (weather, activities etc can be a factor), I consider it a win. If it languishes for a couple of weeks or more, and I find excuses not to wear it, it should go back. Sisi on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093938 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 13:28:31 +0000 Sisi 2093938@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I do not consider myself a confident shopper at all ...  :) .That said, it is something instinctive for me. I try on something and dang! I immediately feel happy. In most cases this will become a workhorse. Anonymous on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093935 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 13:16:52 +0000 Anonymous 2093935@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ A Very high try to buy ratio, probably about 40 to 1. Apologies to store clerks! To me it's by feel mostly. If I put something on and it feels right straightaway, it will probably come home with me! nemosmom on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093928 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 13:00:00 +0000 nemosmom 2093928@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ Another outlier here, LOL!  Lots of really great advice here, though. I am taking notes! Anonymous on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093927 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 12:54:13 +0000 Anonymous 2093927@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ This is an great question.  I enjoyed reading the responses.  For me the answer is very simple.  As RunCarla wrote, It is a combination of ‘this fits like it was made for me’ and ‘d@#% I look good!’  I have to add one more factor, it feel wonderful against my body.   To summarize. 1.  It is something I actually need in my wardrobe (rarely an impulse buy). 2.  It fits me fabulously. 3.  I feel really good wearing it from an aesthetic point of view.   4.  The fabric feels wonder against my skin.   Helena on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093924 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 12:36:12 +0000 Helena 2093924@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I am going to be the outlier ... I have no such process haha! I am more likely to gauge an item's success when I get home, based on how quickly I want to pull the tags off and start wearing it ... I suspect it's that difference between what a piece/outfit looks and feels like irl vs a photo ... It doesn't matter how great the selfie is, if I feel off in the grocery store lineup, I don't want to wear whatever it is. Not very helpful except to say, give yourself grace! It's art more than science as far as I can tell. April on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093921 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 11:48:20 +0000 April 2093921@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I'm impressed by how well you know yourselves and how articulately you  describe your processes!   There are some talented wardrobe-crafters here.  :) Style Fan on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093918 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 11:25:41 +0000 Style Fan 2093918@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I have a shopping list but I am flexible.  I had been looking for a long winter coat, preferably olive, for a few years.  When I tried on the Lululemon puffer last year it felt right.  It looked good, it was a great olive colour and the reviews were excellent.  There was another puffer competing with it that was less expensive but the Lululemon won out.  I felt better when I put it on.  Mr SF agreed with my decision. Same with my new olive boots.  They had been on my list for a few years.  They felt so good on and were the perfect colour so I just knew they were coming home with me. I have bought things that were not on my list but I knew they were just right for my wardrobe.  My Sarah Pacini olive sweater is one of those.  I saw it, tried it on and bought it.  It has earned its keep.    These are the things that I have realized about my shopping. When I try on a piece I feel good in it.  I don't look at something about the piece and wish it was something else.  For example, I don't look at the sleeves and wish they were longer, or straighter, or something else.  I like the piece for what it is. The piece fits into my wardrobe without needing a lot of help.  I don't need to go out and buy more pieces. It fits really well.  There may be alterations needed but in general, the fit is good.  I can see myself wearing the piece for a few years.  I keep my clothes for a long time. No dry clean only.  Back it goes!!!!  Wool coats and blazers are an exception.  Of course, I rarely buy those anymore. I stick to my colour palette.  Olive, cream, ivory, chocolate brown, cognac, denim and a tiny bit of burnt orange.  Sometimes I add some black but in small doses. Anonymous on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093916 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 07:43:57 +0000 Anonymous 2093916@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ First, can I afford it! If that’s ok then next step is does it fit right and feel comfortable. If that is ok then the final step is deciding does it look good on me, and am I happy to wear it. If it passes those tests then it gets bought. Cardiff girl on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093915 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 07:40:21 +0000 Cardiff girl 2093915@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ when I go shopping I always try and wear something that I feel really good in,do my hair and makeup then when I am trying things on it’s a case of,does it look /feel as good as the clothes I came out in and does it look as if I already owned it.If I put something on and I am not sure or I am trying to make it work then it’s a no.Its taken me a long time to work this out! Stagiaire Fash on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093914 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 07:28:53 +0000 Stagiaire Fash 2093914@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You know, I’m a little worried about this for the coming year as I have a list for the first time ever. The way I want to approach it is not “ok, wide-legged pants, have to find a pair of them” but more to go ahead and browse and then, when something appeals to me, that’s when I’ll consult the list to see if I can use it. In all honesty, I have the list in my head, won’t need to pull out the phone, but I still want to keep that order of events. Jane on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093910 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 06:57:29 +0000 Jane 2093910@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ It is a feeling at first as others have said but then a practical thought process. It is definitely easier when I’m not pushed into buying something immediately because I need it. It is also definitely easier when I’m relaxed. DH is the last hurdle. I only show him things when I’m unsure and his first reaction I take. Gigi on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093909 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 06:36:07 +0000 Gigi 2093909@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ As Suz mentions above, part of the equation for me is knowing what I am looking for before I shop. I mostly shop online, and I am generally looking for specific things. To find out what these specific things are, I do a lot of browsing of fashion week photos and that sort of thing online. Then, once I know the kind of thing I want to add to my closet, I go looking for it. When I try the item on, I will have the reaction others have mentioned above: Wow! This looks amazing! The fit is perfect, and the item looks good on me. I can build outfits with the item. And I have the desire to wear the item as soon as possible. taylor on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093908 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 06:21:22 +0000 taylor 2093908@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ It usually happens like this: I see the item..I gasp just a bit.  I touch the item , If the fabric is  excellent  I move to the quality .  I quickly check the price to make sure everything makes sense ,  perhaps it’s on sale.  Then I will try it on.  If I LOVE the fit.... and I must love the fit ,  then I know :) Visual love, fabric , quality and fit , and am I willing to pay that price.  If those things fall into place,  I usually buy.  I’m  a bit of an impulse shopper ,  but I have found some of my favorite and BEST pieces just browsing Suz on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093904 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 04:16:30 +0000 Suz 2093904@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ ETA: a few more thoughts.  I know my needs / desires before I shop. What's missing? What do I feel I need (and don't have) when I'm trying to put together outfits? How do I want to look and what pieces are necessary to achieve that look?  At the same time, I stay open to the wild cards. (They often turn out to be game changers.)  As others have said, if I can immediately imagine a bunch of outfits with this item and see myself wearing it in different contexts, that is a really good sign.  A few of my "absolute right, I know I'm buying (or keeping) this" purchases over the years. As I went through my Finds I realized almost ALL of them would qualify. But these are pieces I felt instantaneously YES about. Some are essentials or completers. Some are statements. Some I may have asked the forum about, but even if I did come for K/R advice I was probably really asking everyone to love my beautiful thing with me. :)  <div> </div> rachylou on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093902 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 04:14:57 +0000 rachylou 2093902@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ You know, that’s a deep question. I think you have to know what you really want and need, which takes some thought before hand. Because you can try something on and look fantastic, but then never reach for it because you didn’t want a dinner dress... you wanted a dog-walking outfit... Suz on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093899 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 04:05:22 +0000 Suz 2093899@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ What the others said. It's a feeling, a "click" of rightness. Often the main indicator is fit. When it fits as if it was made for you, well....maybe you should listen. :)  Like Sal, I've made the worst mistakes in trying to replace worn out essentials. I look and look and look and really have a need and can therefore sometimes convince myself that the not-quite-right is good enough.  Sometimes it is good enough, in the sense that it truly is essential and so a good-enough replacement is okay until I find a better option, because otherwise other great pieces will languish for want of this completer.  This business of waiting for the "click" explains why it takes a long time to build a fantastic working wardrobe.  Jaime on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093885 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 03:25:02 +0000 Jaime 2093885@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ I try something on that I know is a hit and then try it on and see if I get the same feeling of rightness.  Anonymous on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093884 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 03:21:34 +0000 Anonymous 2093884@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ There's just a "click" in my mind when it's right.  Like falling in love with the right person!  All doubt disappears. Toban on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093879 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 02:12:48 +0000 Toban 2093879@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ What Runcarla said ^^. It fits awesome and you feel good in it. I’d also add that it’s when I can immediately picture how it mixes and matches in my wardrobe and when I can’t wait to wear it as soon as possible. If it takes too much work to make it work for me or doesn’t fit my lifestyle ... I just say next. I keep a small wardrobe and almost every item has periods of heavy wear. Carla on "Ask Angie & other confident shoppers: How do you decide you've found it?" https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie-other-confident-shoppers-how-do-you-decide-youve-found-it#post-2093877 Mon, 20 Jan 2020 02:03:20 +0000 Carla 2093877@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ The heavens open, and the angels sing! It is a combination of ‘this fits like it was made for me’ and ‘d@#% I look good!’  Like Sal I’ve had this kind of luck with my thrifted black wool jacket, a white shift dress (also a HEWI), a red linen sleeveless dress, and a leather purse.  Also my last pair of jeans and my black combat style boots.