https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Sat, 23 May 2026 16:19:49 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1889012 Tue, 13 Feb 2018 04:02:58 +0000 Suz 1889012@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Maybe Cee was making a statement? &nbsp;(???)&nbsp;</p> <p>I do understand why you loved the Paris sweater, though. It actually combines one of your essentials (oversized sweater for weekend wear) with a statement (I want to get out of Winnipeg in winter and look glowy while someone serves me my café au lait in bed!)&nbsp;</p> <p>I have mostly essentials, too, because while my heart rules in some other areas in my life, I have trouble allowing it to rule in my closet. Except when I purchase <b>expensive</b> essentials, ha!&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1889011 Tue, 13 Feb 2018 04:01:40 +0000 Cee 1889011@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Maine Lady's cream cowlneck started it ! </p> <p>Look at it's police mugshot photo ! I ask you, have you ever seen a more evil garment !?</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1889006 Tue, 13 Feb 2018 03:54:16 +0000 Anonymous 1889006@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What ?? Lol. And for the record , I cannot with cowlnecks either . </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1889002 Tue, 13 Feb 2018 03:46:14 +0000 Cee 1889002@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I love you lot more than I hate cowlnecks, loud infomercials and loud infomercials selling cowlnecks... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888998 Tue, 13 Feb 2018 03:37:33 +0000 Anonymous 1888998@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>A Gemini through and through And you’re absolutely right , my heart dictates everything . </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888919 Tue, 13 Feb 2018 00:41:39 +0000 Carla 1888919@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Re-reading, your post and your PARIS sweater story and it struck me that maybe 'statement' pieces are emotional (heart) and 'essentials' are calculated items (head)?</p> <p>My head rules my heart, and most of my wardrobe is practical essentials (turtlenecks, t-shirts, tanks, straight cut jeans and pants, pencil skirts). The unplanned, emotional, impulse purchases are my statements - and unlike anything else in my closet! Maybe you have more statements because your heart rules your head? (I'm wondering if you are a Leo?)</p> <p>Purple leather jacket<br /> Embroidered silk bomber<br /> RELAX sweater. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888914 Tue, 13 Feb 2018 00:20:14 +0000 Sal 1888914@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lisa - I will write an off topic post on my planning.</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888819 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 16:58:49 +0000 texstyle 1888819@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I think I own mostly essentials but for me maybe the statements are much more subtle than others. I have a pair of interesting jeans that seem a little more of a statement. My white twill jeans are more statement than my blue denim jeans (for me again). My long knotted necklace might be another statement for me. <i>Any </i>dress would be a statement for me lol. Also a couple of my newer patterned sleeveless tops are def. more statement than my usual.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888805 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 16:14:13 +0000 Sara L. 1888805@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I find these essentials posts interesting because I can't figure out essentials from statements in my own closet.&nbsp; I've kind of given up on this exercise for myself but I still find it fascinating to read about.&nbsp; </p> <p>I love that pink sweater - the pink is pale enough and dusty enough that it reads feminine without being super girly. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888796 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 15:36:17 +0000 Jenn 1888796@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm just popping in to say that I kind of love that Paris sweater too. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888794 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 15:33:05 +0000 Elizabeth P 1888794@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I struggle with this as well Lisa, and am formulating a post about my situation... getting all the feedback is certainly food for thought.</p> <p>I feel I'm also much more of a statement girl than an essential girl.&nbsp; Although, I definitely have some essentials.&nbsp; I don't layer much, so I need my pieces to speak for themselves.&nbsp; </p> <p>Following with interest! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888788 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 15:09:15 +0000 Christina F. 1888788@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm just chiming in to say my tops are all statements, too. Except for the few I keep for statement bottoms. I'm also tracking my wardrobe, and I repeat bottoms a LOT, and tops hardly ever. I should cull if I can, for space reasons. But anyway, tracking has been helping me figure out which items belong in which category. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888776 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 13:51:59 +0000 Helena 1888776@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Just re-reading this thread, and I really find Suz' comment about 'items you've been wearing since high school' being a good clue something's an essential, really helpful ... just re-visited my list and, yep, with variations in cut (e.g. my skinnies used to be bootcuts used to be baggy high-waisted used to be tapered jeans) to account for the current decade, my list is virtually unchanged in 30 years and still going strong ha! I guess we really do know ourselves when we're young! :)&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888682 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 02:03:38 +0000 Column 1888682@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>lisap: I hear you on basics being boring. I was an all statement buyer before YLF. The problem with my closet was that I HAD no basics—not even footwear that made daily outfits work. Now, I have a closet full of them, and I can get dressed. What a concept. I did have to figure out a silhouette for my bottom half. I prefer narrower bottoms, whether pencil skirts or skinny leg trousers. Nailing that piece made everything else fall into place. And when I find a good basic, like my winter lined Talbots trousers, I don`t mind buying multiple colors, since finding basics is no fun, ha ha. No one really notices that I am always wearing the same trouser precisely because it is a support act to something higher profile, or just part of an ensemble. So I have made my peace with basics that way. Statement dresses, however are an entirely different weakness! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888673 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 01:37:37 +0000 Anonymous 1888673@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>Suz</b> - I laughed at the cultural norm comment too . &nbsp;And on that note, <b>Sally</b>, I want to know what these new planning tools are that you are using in other parts of your life. That comment struck home with me. &nbsp;</p> <p>You know , lately, I've been buying things, some good, some kind of questionable, and it's often a response to having been in a spending drought. &nbsp;And instead of filling holes, or boning up on essentials, I buy something else. &nbsp;Two weeks ago I came home with a crazy (actually, I cut the tags off and wore it out of the store) oversized, pink mohair sweater with the word PARIS knit into the front. I went into that store looking for black work pants. &nbsp; For starters, I don't usually go for words on clothes, I don't go for pale pink, and am well aware of oversize sweaters being questionable flattering, or not. &nbsp;What was that all about? But I LOVE this sweater now and am so happy I bought it! &nbsp;Essentials, bah. &nbsp;I still don't have good black work pants, however &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888671 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 01:29:28 +0000 Anonymous 1888671@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><b>unfrumped </b>- this makes sense to me too, and how I see it.<br /><b>Vix</b> - I agree with your categories - and like the in-betweener part too</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888668 Mon, 12 Feb 2018 01:25:47 +0000 Anonymous 1888668@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Sally - I've heard of Witchery , and appreciate this find for the Kowtow tee. That's really up my alley! &nbsp;</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me/page/2#post-1888567 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 20:27:08 +0000 Sal 1888567@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am not huge on essentials either Lisa- and I can struggle with things like a basic merino sweater or a plain long sleeve tee - they are not enticing in store.</p> <p>There are one or two labels here that produce lots of neutrals but in slightly more interesting shapes (- maybe seamings, maybe neckline) - I have a few simple black and navy pieces from them.</p> <p>The labels are Witchery, Kowtow and Moochi if you want to look them up - Witchery is an Australian chain store - mid market, the others are NZ brands, Kowtow is a local ethical brand, and Moochi a local designer brand.&nbsp; Attached is a pic of a Kowtow tee I bought - I wear it more fitted than shown&nbsp; - or maybe I just fill it out with curves - the lower neck is flattering on my short neck, and the twisted side seams make it a little more interesting.&nbsp; I know it is still an essential and pretty plain but it feels more exciting to me. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888542 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 18:54:33 +0000 Suz 1888542@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Wow, <b>Sal</b>, this is brilliance, here... <b>LOVE!&nbsp;</b></p> <p>"<i>1) I have to get dressed every day- it is a cultural norm around here.</i><br /><i>2) In that case it takes a similar amount of time to put on nice stylish clothes as poor ones.</i><br /><i>3) How I dress does matter - for work, in social settings and towards m own self esteem.</i><br /><i>4) When things are chaotic in my life (first six months of 2017 were really rubbish for me) having some control and order around my clothes helped me.</i><br /><i>5) I am using some new planning tools in my work and family life this year and in a way they are similar to how I started planning my wardrobe. I saw the benefits I gained and realised that I could improve other aspects of my life using a similar process."<br /></i><br />Plus, #1 wins the comedy prize today....along with <b>TG'</b>s "men give zero you-know-whats about spending time on hobbies that don't benefit the world!"&nbsp;</p> <p>This is totally beneficial to the entire forum.&nbsp;</p> <p><b>Lisa,</b> I have the same question about proportion of essentials to statements. I suspect it would differ between individuals. But I really want to find a way to figure out what the optimum balance is for myself. And intend to do some more serious analysis this spring to get there.&nbsp;</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888537 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 18:37:15 +0000 unfrumped 1888537@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I might distinguish between super-statement tops vs “ interesting, stand-alone tops” which are an Essential. You can’t get dressed without them. You have to shop for them to have a certain number, replace worn- out ones, match to bottoms. Amongst them might be a range, some more memorably statement-y than others. Perhaps I’m in the weeds, though. I don’t want to confuse thing more! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888526 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 18:25:11 +0000 Anonymous 1888526@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks all. I must sound like a whiner for attention . &nbsp; In my world/family/uupbringing etc, being interested in clothes relates to spending $. And that's the issue. &nbsp;Buying clothes has always been the way I dealt with loneliness, low self-esteem etc....and it can get out of control very quickly. &nbsp;</p> <p>Anyhow - I find these essentials the hardest things to buy. &nbsp;I can pick out a statement sweater or jacket in less than 2 minutes , but try to buy a pair of work pants, or even a pair of khakis, or a plain cashmere sweater etc &nbsp;and I'm stumped. &nbsp;It turns into a frustrating quest (see a recent plea for help post regarding work trousers) . It's not necessaril about fit, but that IS an issue, it's more about not being interested in very plain essentials. Even my work pants need to be interesting and not just a straight cut dress pant. &nbsp;I wonder if this indicates that I should not try so hard to find uniqueness in every piece, and that for these essentials, go with very traditional and basic designs?</p> <p>There has been a noticeable flip-flop of how I view basics now vs when I was in my 30's. Dressing traditionally, and with quality basics looked good when I was younger, now - it just makes me feel plain and dowdy. I fear I may be seeing myself in the mirror differently than others do, and for all I know, I look crazy ! &nbsp;(I keep hearing a recent comment made by my daughter with regards to a joke I was making about "old people" &nbsp;- Mom, I don't know what you and dad see when you look in the mirror but.......). &nbsp;That still makes me laugh.</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888490 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 17:10:15 +0000 Vix 1888490@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi Lisa --</p> <p>Angie gave you a great start so maybe use that for whatever classification system works for you at whatever percentage.</p> <p>I can't do the basics/essentials breakdown because I have statement hosiery, essential stretch slips etc. And then some of my statements are workhorses blah blah so it gets tangled in my mind.</p> <p>Don't know if it's helpful but for me it's:</p> <p><b>-- backbones </b>(will buy over and over -- sometimes plain, sometimes more detailed -- generally cannot put an outfit together without involving at least one of them)&nbsp;</p> <p>[ex: black and grey knit skirts and dresses; B&amp;G merino sweaters;&nbsp;streamlined B&amp;G pants;&nbsp;metallic shoes; stretch silk slips; black knee high boots and booties; deep blue and purple tops/sweaters/scarves; shell-based jewelry; sterling drop earrings; plain black hosiery of 20 different weights + microfishnets; streamlined dark wash jeans; black leggings]</p> <p><b>-- in-betweeners </b>(bridge pieces that work with backbones and / or statements)</p> <p>[ex: shoes/boots in color-color or with interesting details; shoes in "expanded" neutrals; solid color-color dresses in all weights;&nbsp;print silk jersey wrap dresses;&nbsp;various jewelry; textured hose and tights; print jersey skirts; trendier jeans/pants; print scarves]</p> <p><b>-- statements&nbsp;</b>(a lot of my statements are also workhorses and I generally make sure they work with my backbones and in-betweeners)</p> <p>[ex: print silk tops and tunics; high-drama color-color raincoat; OOT&nbsp; jewelry; attention-getting hosiery like black and silver herringbone tights + black with silver overlay fishnets] </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888446 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 15:16:12 +0000 Helena 1888446@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Men have exactly 0% guilt about having hobbies that don't directly improve the state of the world ... Just sayin' ... Talk on Lisa!! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888437 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 14:41:50 +0000 Amy Isabella 1888437@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Absolutely what kkards said! And thank you for posting this - I learn an awful lot from your threads. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888435 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 14:34:31 +0000 Janet 1888435@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>What kkards said!</p> <p>I’m glad you posted this because I get a little confused around “essentials” too (I feel like I tend to want some statements to be essentials). </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888433 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 14:28:18 +0000 kkards 1888433@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>lisap...the world is spinning out of control...and ylf is one of the places i come to give me a little relief from it...actually a big relief...here is a group of people, most of whom have never meet IRL, many from far away places, forming bonds over shared interests....its the spirit of the Olympics but without the podium LOL!<br />anyway....i hear you on the struggle of&nbsp;defining your essentials...the line between essential and basic can be fuzzy.....i'm afaird that i will be no help there....</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888419 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 13:28:52 +0000 Aquamarine 1888419@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am also enjoying this thread, and learning a lot from everyone, so thanks for starting it Lisa.</p> <p>When I wonder why the heck I am concerned about clothing, I remember the challenging times in my life when I was thankful my wardrobe was sorted. Those challenging times were a tiny bit easier because I could focus on the task at hand. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888379 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 07:12:28 +0000 Jane 1888379@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Just saying that I’m enjoying this thread very much. Thank you Lisap for starting. I will watch with interest. </p> <p>(Thinking about clothes stops me from over thinking on everything else!) </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888362 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 05:16:30 +0000 Jenni NZ 1888362@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>For me getting my clothing more sorted has been of huge psychological help. I really like what Sal wrote. I think it gives me something small to control when there are so many things I can't- the political situation worldwide being one and the future of my adult children's lives is another, being unsure when/whether they may have excellent long-term relationships, could buy property or not, etc. I think I'm learning to accept all these things but having a bit of a hobby like this is not so harmful? My husband plays computer games instead and we accept each other's relaxation. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/ask-angie---not-sure-i-know-what-essentials-are-for-me#post-1888358 Sun, 11 Feb 2018 03:58:57 +0000 Lynn 1888358@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I care too I also get the "feeling guilty for spending time thinking about clothes - when the world is falling apart around us". But as Sal says we do have to get dressed everyday so why not have it bring us some joy. I am now trying to view it as part of my self-care. &nbsp;</p> <p>I too struggle with understanding essentials so yoru posting this has been very helpful to me. I also tend to wear a statement top + pants as my primary uniform. &nbsp;I have just begun adding some outerwear toppers but my climate is more forgiving than yours. </p> <p>Thanks for sharing your struggles.&nbsp;</p>